Disclaimer: I do not own The Walking Dead, I just love it.
The Girl I Love
I liked Beth from the start. Just from her feeding me a few times, I could tell she was a really nice girl. While I was still in bed, I thought about the deer and what he had told me. Dale was smart so I decided to ask him about it later.
After I was up and able to get around again, Beth didn't pay much attention to me. Of course, I was just a kid and she already had a boyfriend, Jimmy. He was nice to me and seemed like a decent guy. I could tell that Beth liked him a lot. I saw her around the farm and she was polite to me, but nothing other than that.
Hershel's farm was fun. I had never really been on a farm before. There were horses, cows, and chickens to see. Feeding the chickens was a real treat. The fields and the swamps were cool too. I enjoyed exploring them. But mostly, I missed Sophia. She was my friend and I was worried about her. I liked her quite a bit. She was out there alone and in this unholy mess.
I asked Dad about her. Sophia was lost and we had to find her. Dad said that they were doing the best that they could. I really believed that, especially when Darryl got injured trying to find her. I told Dad that I knew that he was lying when he said Sophia was okay. It wasn't a bad lie, but one to make me feel better.
I went to Dale when he was standing watch and climbed up on top of his RV. "What do you know about death?" I asked him shyly.
Dale looked at me for a moment and smiled. "Are you asking me because you almost died or because of those things out there?"
So I told him all of it. About the woods and the line in front of me with nothing on the other side. Then I told him about the deer and what he had told me about Beth.
"From the sound of it, you may have had a near death experience. It can happen when you are about to die," he said stroking his beard. "One school of thought is that your brain hallucinates when you are dying . It's simply your final thoughts. The other theory, according to some people is that there is something after."
"What do you believe?"
"I'm a philosopher about these things son. I think that living a good life is important. If you want to know what I believe . . . I had a wife before this, Irma. I loved her and I hope to see her again after I die. If you want to know what I think about you and the deer. I think it was the last thing you saw before you got shot. It's only natural to dream of something you see or think about before you go to sleep. As far as the deer telling you that you'll fall in love with the first girl you see when you wake up . . . She is already with someone and you're too young for her. I wouldn't put much faith in it."
Before I went, Dale called me back, "One more thing. Be careful about Shane. I don't trust him."
"What do you mean?" I asked, confused. "Shane is my friend and he's friends with my Dad and my Mom. He helped us. We wouldn't have survived without him. I've known him for as long as I can remember."
"I mean I think he has done some bad things and I don't like it. Watch him."
So I didn't believe it about the deer, I told myself it was a hallucination. Still, I wanted to spend time with her and I did when I could. I was playing checkers with Beth when Shane started shouting about the walkers in the barn. When we found Sophia in the barn, I was so sad. She looked so like herself after she got bit that I wondered if there was still something in her that was still her. Later, I realized that there was nothing left of her in there. Dead is dead and being bitten and walking around after means you're dead.
I saw how upset Beth was by the death of the one walker. She walked over to it thinking it was dead, but it got up and tried to bite her. It was a close thing, it almost got her before Dad and Shane pulled her away. Then T-Dog killed it.
Afterward, Beth found me sitting in the house crying for Sophia. That was the first time that she and I really talked. She sat down next to me and said, "I'm sorry about your friend Carl. I lost my Mother Annette and my brother Shawn as well. They both got bit and Otis helped Hershel put them in the barn." Beth got up and took a picture off of the refrigerator and showed it to me. "That's Shawn on the left and Annette on the right. The picture was taken about a year ago. It's hard to deal with and it hurts to lose them. I'm sad because of it and I'm sorry for your friend."
"I was friends with her. She was the first girl I ever kissed. I didn't like her Dad and I know she and Carol didn't either. I'm not sure why though, but I think he was a bad man. Shane beat him up right before he died."
"Some people are just like that. When I was a kid, younger than you are now, our dog Charlie got bitten by a skunk and became rabid. Dad shot him. He was a good dog but he went mad and started to bite. I think that happens to people too. Not just like those things out there but in their mind. Like Ted Bundy or John Wayne Gacy."
"I'm sorry about your brother and your Mom," I said while I wiped away a tear. Then she excused herself and said she had to go wash dishes. I went out of the house and heard a crash coming from inside. I didn't know what happened. Mom told me later that she collapsed and later tried to commit suicide.
"What's suicide, Mom?"
"It's when someone tries to take their own life."
I was scared and upset. "Why would somebody want to do that?"
"Some people get that way when life gets too hard for them. Beth lost both her Mother and her brother. Do you remember how sad you were when we thought that we had lost your Dad?"
I nodded, "Shane said he was dead, but he wasn't."
"I know, he lied and I still don't like him for it. Be careful around Shane Carl. I don't think he has our best interests at heart."
"What do you mean? He helped us before."
"It's hard to explain, but if you haven't noticed, he wasn't happy when your father came back."
I resolved to keep an eye on Shane, in case he tried to hurt my Dad. Dale had said something about it to me as well. I stole a gun from Daryl at one point and tried to kill a walker, but I couldn't do it. Because I failed, Dale died and I felt bad about it. But I remembered what Dale said to me about Shane. So I followed my Dad and Shane when they went to find Randall and in the end I was the one to kill Shane.