Hello lovelies! I'm so sorry about the delay, I've been busy with university business, like finding a room and packing my stuff, so i didn't really have time to write. I hope you like this, it turned a bit more angsty than i anticipated, but it will bring a bit more depth into the relationship, I think. ENJOY AND LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK!
The new day arrived with whispered conversation.
The muttered words were as quiet as they could possibly be, but they still weren't quiet enough to keep Hermione in her sleeping state. The giggles and hushes slowly seeped through her unconscious thoughts and pulled her back into the world that had changed drastically in the few hours she had been absent.
The words that had made it to her brain didn't seem to make any sense. The harder she tried to understand, the harder it got to make out the sentences through the hushing sounds. With her eyes still shut tight so they would think she was still asleep, she tried to remember where she was. It seemed as if she had only slept for ten minutes, her brain slow and quiet, still lingering to the harshly interrupted quietness that is sleep. By putting all her senses, but her sight on alert, she slowly realized that she wasn't in her bedroom; the breakfast smell that normally only faintly adorned the air was strong, the smell of bacon forcing its way in her nose, making her mouth water. Not to long after that it dawned on her that she wasn't lying alone. There was an arm circled around her waist that gently held her in place. She was pretty sure that, if the arm would disappear all of a sudden, she would tumble out of the bed. "Did I fall asleep while talking to Ginny? Who is laying behind me?!" She frantically searched her brain for the answer, going through everything she had done last night before sleep had taken her.
Her eyes flashed open wide, a gasp escaping her mouth.
She had fallen asleep with Ronald Weasley.
Everything turned ice sharp as all the events from last night rushed back, as if someone had cleaned the condensed goggles that had hidden these memories inside her brain. Hermione didn't even realize that her surroundings had grown quiet. She was breathing erratically, forcing the air inside her lungs at such a fast pace she wasn't even sure if she was breathing at all. All the emotions overwhelmed her and she felt herself lean into the body behind her.
His arm instinctively tightened itself around her waist and she felt his slow and steady breath on her neck. She tried to mimic his breathing, and after a while she felt herself calm down. He always seemed to soothe her, calming her absent-mindedly. It would be one of his silly jokes, or the awkward neck scratch he so often does, but most of the time his presence alone would be enough. There was this air of rest and peace around him that she had not felt around anyone else, ever. It's like a radiance made especially for her, and it would soak into her skin to warm her bones and control her autonomic nervous system, calming her heart rate and breathing until she was completely calm again.
She remembered how she had listened to the soothing sound of his breaths before falling asleep last night; it was the sweetest lullaby she'd ever heard. Now that she thought of it, she couldn't remember feeling this well rested in ages. There had been no nightmares, and she had not woken up once in the whole night, something that hadn't happened since the war had started.
"He really is my savior." she whispered.
She then noticed the absence of sound, and she focused on her surroundings to check where exactly she was lying. As her blurry sight became sharper, her cheeks turned red, and for a split second she wished she hadn't gone downstairs last night, because then she wouldn't have been in the horribly awkward situation she was now.
Everywhere she looked there were ginger-haired people, grinning like madmen at the sight before them. And to make it worse, she could see George and Bill taking photos of it all.
Since it was only 2 weeks after the battle, the whole Weasley family -including Harry, who was basically part of the family by now- slept in The Burrow. Although no one would admit it, most of them stayed for Molly. They all wanted to check on how she was dealing with everything, and since no one was happy with what they saw, they stayed to make her feel less alone. It was as if all the Weasley men tried to fill up Fred's place, even if they knew that this wasn't possible. It was nice having them around, though. They filled the air with chatter and sometimes even laughter, and it gave Hermione the chance to get to know the entire Weasley family. She hadn't had a chance to really talk to Charlie, Bill, and Percy before the whole war thing had started, and now they didn't have to go anywhere, there was time enough for that. At a normal occasion she would have even been happy about seeing George's sly grin again as he snapped away, but for now, at this very moment, Hermione wished they had all gone to their own homes, because there was just a bit too much ginger around her. She opened her mouth and then closed it again, unsure of what she was supposed to say to make them stop staring at her. She looked at Ginny, who was grinning and wiggling her eyebrows, and Hermione wished she knew where her wand was, so that she could hex those eyebrows with a nice enlarging spell. But before she could do that, she had to make sure that Molly wouldn't hex her, or Ron, into oblivion.
While Hermione stuttered a weak good morning, she thought about how she was going to tell everyone what had happened last night. The longer she thought of it, the more she began to regret the way she had acted the night before. While Molly and Arthur and everyone else was sorting out there lives, she was acting like a hormonal teenager, snogging someone in the middle of the night and falling asleep on the couch of the family who had so kindly granted her permission to stay. She had acted radical, without thinking of the consequences, and when she looked at Molly now, she could see how, beneath the affection molly felt towards her and the cheerfulness of the moment, there was also doubt, panic and pain in her eyes. The pain maybe wasn't due to her acts alone, but the panic and doubt probably were and this made Hermione's heart clench so painfully she almost gasped out loud.
She had done everything she had wanted to do for so long, but while doing that, she had lost a piece of herself. She had not followed the rules, not thought about others and most of all, she hadn't stayed between the lines. At the moment the Weasley family had needed her most, the moment when they could really use the Hermione that was down-to-earth, caring and clever, she had left that Hermione in the corner and chose for herself. She knew that people could break under the pressure of a trauma, she had seen it with her own eyes, but she had always thought that she would be stronger, that she would be able to pull through and help the ones she loved to go through it as well. But she had failed. She had failed the Weasley family, and she had failed herself. She should've waited, but instead she had succumbed.
Dark thoughts began to roll into her head like fog coming out of a fog machine at a club, and she couldn't do anything to stop it. She tried to push it away by focusing on Ron's breathing again, but the sound of her pumping heart was so loud that it shut off all the other sounds. It was as if someone had thrown timber on the flames Ron had almost entirely extinguished last night. The glowing embers of her depression turned into a roaring fire again, burning away the happiness she had felt just moments ago. Everything was into ashes again.
She had totally forgotten about the situation she was in, but she was snapped out of her dazed state when the arm that held her into place disappeared all of a sudden and she, just like all her happy thoughts, came crashing down. As the ground met her body in an unforgiving crash, sound washed over her and the sound of Ron's curses filled her ears.
then everything turned black.
The smell of bacon and eggs slowly waved its way through Ron's nervous system, awakening his senses until it finally hit the wake-up button at the back of his brain, pulling him out of his unconscious state. Ron started to move his arms above his head to stretch his stiff muscles, like he did every morning, but something stopped him from freely moving his left arm. He peeked open his left eye just a tiny bit to see why he couldn't move properly, and all the sleep he felt melted away instantly.
"BLOODY FUCKING.. WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU ALL DOING IN MY BLOODY BEDROOM?!"
Ron scrambled backwards, trying to hide his body under his sheets until he noticed that he was wearing a shirt and did not have any sheets to cover himself up with. Next to that, something was moaning ,as if it was in pain, right next to his bed. Which wasn't his bed. And to make it all even more complicated, his whole bloody family was watching him, booming smiles plastered to each of their faces.
"Could someone tell me what the fuck is going on, or do I have to hex someone's bullocks off first?!"
No one answered him though. The moaning sound had stopped and everyone's eyes were on the thing that had produced it, concern written on all of their faces. Ron hurried his way to the edge of the couch -"why the hell did i fall asleep on the couch, for fuck's sake!"- and peeked over it. On the ground lay a very disheveled Hermione. Ron stared at her unmoving body for a long time, roaming her tiny frame with his eyes as if he could read all the answers to his ignored questions on her skin. "her skin."
Suddenly, he remembered his hands touching a lot of that particular warm and soft skin less than 12 hours ago. He remembered her lips on his, her scent and her oh so lovely tongue. Ron's eyes grew wide as it dawned on him. He had slept with Hermione fucking Granger!
He didn't have time to relive everything that had happened that night, though, because Harry was shouting at him. Ron moved his gaze from Hermione and looked at him, confused about why he looked so panicked. Then his head finally caught up with his ears and all sound came back. "Ron! For Merlin's sake, do something! Wake her up! Don't let her lie there like that, you're the fucking -sorry Molly- freaking one who pushed her on the ground in the first place! GET OFF YOUR LAZY ARSE AND DO SOMETHING!" Harry just stood there, his arms waving in a frantic matter, trying to help Hermione by reaching out for her and then pulling back again, as if his touch was only going to make matters worse. Ron got up from the couch as fast as his stiff legs allowed him, and he then crouched next to Hermione, whose face was pale as a sheet, eyes closed. He gently took her by the shoulders and sat her up against the couch, so that her back was resting against it. He stared at her still closed eyes, stared so hard his eyes began to water. All he could think about was that he had fucked it up. Instead of making this morning the best morning of their lives, he had pushed her unconscious! He just didn't know what he had to do, all he could think about were the sparks that had been in Hermione's eyes that night. The sparks that still had to be there when she opened them again.
Since his mind couldn't produce any useful information, his instincts took over, and he pulled Hermione close. He could feel her heartbeat through their shirts and he pulled her even closer, so that every inch of their bodies was touching. He then did what he had done the night before when she had freaked out: he started whispering soothing words in her ear. He told her how she meant the world to him, how nothing was her fault and most of all, how much he loved her. He told her how he saw his life with her, how they would grow old and she would get a job at the ministry while he went to Auror training. How they would have ginger-haired kids that would be as smart as her, or bushy haired kids that would obsess over a not-so-talented quidditch team. he told her how they would live together forever, how they would make love in the morning and how he would never leave her. He poured out his heart and soul to her, while he kept pulling her closer, begging her to wake up and smile at him again. Hoping everything would stay perfect.
Hermione stayed quiet.
After what seemed like an eternity someone shoved him away from Hermione. He didn't even try to resist, nor did he look at who had shoved him so rudely. His whole mind was blank, his eyes wide with panic. He stared at Hermione's limp body, the image blurry because of his tears. He didn't even remember crying, but when he rubbed at his eyes he felt how his whole face was wet. There was a loud beeping in his ears, and it felt like he was breathing through a straw. All he could think of was Hermione, and how he had managed to ruin everything. His soul was in her head now, he had given her all he could give her, and she was still unconscious. He could still feel her heartbeat against his chest, as if she was still in his arms, but at the same time it felt like she was miles away. People were now blocking his view, standing over Hermione in a frenzy of movement and sound, but he couldn't register anything. He felt someone drag him up, and he let that person guide him away from Hermione without protest. He didn't know anymore. He didn't know what to do, how to function. All he knew was that the love of his life, who he had kissed for the first time less than 12 hours ago, was unconscious, and it was all his fault. He had not been able to save her, and it hurt like hell.
The butterflies that were soaring in his stomach just second ago had been turned into dragons, and Ron imagined them tearing at his stomach and intestines, eating him from inside out, while he couldn't do anything but sit in his room. What he was feeling surely matched the image.
OKAY SO THIS WAS A SHORT AND ANGSTY ONE! there will be more, but I can't tell you when since uni will start in two days and I just don't know how much time I'll have between classes. PLEASE REVIEW AND FOLLOW IF YOU WANT TO SEE MORE! XXXXXXXXXXX