Warnings: Cursing, and I'm gonna be a lot less gentle. That means this warning covers EVERY word, so if I decide to toss out the N-word cuz' Hidan's all about colloquial, nobody better bitch. Suicidal!Hidan, cutting (more blood letting, but still a possible trigger), possible character death. High school AU, KakuHida, typical Akatsuki parings. No beta (but if anyone wants to, be my guest)
Disclaimer: I do not own anything other than the WORDS I BLEED FROM MY SOUL.
"This is the fourth time we've caught you doing this, Kakuzu." She maintained eye contact when she addressed him but when she didn't, she stared out of the frosty window. She didn't want to be here today, and neither did Kakuzu. "You're a smart kid, you have to be to have this-this web, I guess. You know, instead of using your connections to sell essays or answer keys or whatever cheating ring you're involved with, you could tutor kids or whatever."
"It isn't as lucrative." he muttered blandly. Kids with too much money would rather pay for an A instead of God-honest knowledge. But Kakuzu didn't care; he sold whatever was in-demand. "And this is the first time you've caught me."
"I know you must think we're all stupid here. And maybe that's my fault, I shouldn't have called you in those previous times without a sufficient amount of evidence. Instead, you've gotten three of your friends into some pretty serious trouble." Her eyes glanced back toward the window and she sighed. Kakuzu also occasionally stared out of the window, sometimes wondering what was keeping her attention. They were on the first floor of the school and the only thing outside of her window was a tree. "Aren't you even the least bit ashamed?"
Kakuzu shook his head, "I never did anything wrong. They copied and sold answers I wrote down. They paid me to answer questions but I did not give them consent to distribute them." His answer was less-than-satisfactory. He knew that at this point, that answer just wouldn't cut it. The first time he was brought in, he played stupid. Then he played the victim. Then he played innocent.
"I could have you expelled, and I'm sure you realize this." the principal paused and waited for him to nod, "But I've a better idea. All you have to do is tutor several kids for the rest of the year and you're golden."
He raised an eyebrow, "What if I just got those kids into this ring? Wouldn't all of this be counterproductive?"
She shrugged, "You could, definitely. But I'm giving you a good group of kids who honestly can't afford it or their schedules just aren't working for them. If any of them even hint that you're pawning your little cheat-sheets to them, then you will be expelled. No more exceptions, Kakuzu. You are on the very tips of the edge and I nearly murdered to get this done."
"Sounds... a little too good…"
"Like I said, they're one of the few decent kids I can find in this place. They need some help and you're definitely one of the smartest kids here. It's a win-win situation." Except he would be losing time, losing money, and he wasn't so sure of his web anymore. His classmates were also being interrogated, one at a time. Trying to white out his business, the smaller branches would either die from fear or inability to cheat properly.
"Fine," Kakuzu couldn't afford to be expelled and all of his teachers were now watching. Watching and waiting for a new string of idiots to pass a test with matching answers (word by word, written exams).
"You're first tutoring session will be this Thursday, right after school in the media center." The principal watched him as he gathered his things but before he left the room, she called out, "Don't forget! Tips of the edge!"
"So, what're ya' gonna do now?" Kisame asked. He chewed on some kind of minty gum that made the air around him smell like the ocean. He sat on the edge of the fountain in the outdoor mall beside Kakuzu. Two others stood beside them.
Kakuzu sighed, disappointed in himself, "Tutor a bunch of brats."
"Your business was bound to fail." Pein informed him unhelpfully. He was wearing a new set of jewelry today. It must be the nineteenth of the month, and every nineteenth day he swapped out his studs for a new matching pair. It was a supposed rebirth every month after and before September, Pein's actual birthday. What a rich bastard.
"Odd you would say that, considering you were the first to propose the idea five years ago." Last month was silver hoops with black stripes. Now he wore some purple studs, maybe amethyst. It would have looked ridiculously gay on anyone else, but Pein pulled it off with deadly sexuality. The lithe, paper white girl leaning on his arm seemed to add onto his sex appeal. She was folding tiny triangles and placing them into her small black shoulder bag but she folded them with such indifference and refinement, it seemed cultured.
The red-head scoffed, "Of course, it was a magnificent idea. You must have earned at least enough to pay for a car." He didn't pause for Kakuzu's response, because they both knew he did, "But everything falls at some point, even if it never hit a true high point. Nothing lasts forever."
The stitched teenager growled, annoyed at the suggestion that he was doomed to fail and his "business" was anything less than accomplished. "What about you, Pein? Does a god ever fall?"
He didn't even blink, just continued to play with the ends of Konan's midnight blue locks, "Yes, yes they do. But for me, I still have mountains to move before I meet my end."
Pause. "Intense." Kisame breathed before rolling his eyes, "Now that that's done, when's Itachi coming?"
Konan paused in her folding to roll her eyes, "Do you ever listen?"
"Wait, did he tell me already?" Kisame chewed on his lip, confused as if he typically remembered bits of information normally.
"Yes, he told us yesterday that he wouldn't be able to meet up with us today. He has to pick up his brother from some marching band thing." she informed him, a little on the snarky side.
"Oh yeah…" Kisame murmured before standing up and stretching, "Lame. I don't know about you guys but without Itachi, Tobi, and Deidara here, this group isn't much of a party." It was true, everyone in their little group was a bitch but it was less noticeable when someone added humor. Except Itachi wasn't funny, just not bitchy, which made him pretty chill to hang out with.
It was Konan's turn to roll her eyes, "That's too sweet of you." The two other teenagers were still too busy glaring at each other. But at least Kakuzu waved without looking as the pale-blue swimmer walked away.
"See you guys tomorrow. Don't get arrested without me!"
"We should at least grab a pretzel before doing anything too exciting." Konan moved away from Pein and he finally broke eye contact to follow her. He stalked behind her like a shadow while she headed to the stand as if no one was with her.
Kakuzu sighed and decided he didn't feel like being here today either. Why did he hang out with these people?
The "good group of kids" was… lackluster, to say the least. No one stood out to Kakuzu, he wasn't even sure if these other seniors were even real. They seemed to be those disposable characters on television shows that fade away after the real star walked into the room, whose arms occasionally came into the shot and voices sounding as a quiet, busy buzz.
Some made eye contact, some didn't. Of the six people in his group, only four arrived.
After the first five minutes of awkwardly asking what everyone needed assistance on and receiving literally no reply, he asked, "What is wrong with all of you?"
Still no response, not that he expected any. Kakuzu continued mockingly, "Not enough self-esteem, or are all of you just mute? Mute and stupid?"
The response was passive with small bows of heads and frowns. One girl opened her mouth as if to say something but as soon as he completely turned his head towards her, she shut her brace-fenced teeth.
"We are studying History and I'm not willing to teach any of you morons-" a door slammed open, "…English."
"Woah, what the fuck? I thought Euro was meeting up here?" Silver hair and purple eyes, as strange as anyone Kakuzu normally talked to. His white shirt was half unbuttoned, showing off his lean muscles that poured into hidden abs. Kakuzu kept his eyes above sea level but the teen's face was just as appetizing.
Someone interesting had just arrived.
"You are late," he paused to look down at his list. This was either Kazuma or Nanae. "Kazuma, I presume?"
"Assuming makes an ass of you. My name's Hidan, you dick-weed.." he replied haughtily, "Seriously, you've gotta be like to the most five years older than us. And stop looking like I fucked around with your mom."
The kid had a death wish. Kakuzu glared at him, frowning and menacingly snarled, "Watch yourself, I'm not an enemy you want." Instead of the reaction he hoped for, but he at least wasn't expecting since the kid was pretty gutsy, Hidan scoffed.
"I could say the same fucking thing to you, but I wouldn't want you breaking any mirrors. Dick."
Kakuzu didn't know if Hidan would make this tutoring punishment more or less bearable.
"Why are you here?"
"To suck cock—what the fuck do you think?"
Kakuzu rolled his eyes, "The principal informed me I would be tutoring students willing to learn, so again, why are you here?"
"Seriously? She said if I went to this piece-a-shit-waisting-time and helped tutor dumbasses, I wouldn't get expelled." Someone sitting down coughed, insulted but remained silent. Honestly, weren't stupid kids supposed to at least have a personality to fall back on?
"I highly doubt you know anything about European history."
"The fuck? You can't just guess that!" Hidan snapped, "I know every goddamn religious happening in that forsaken continent!"
"I highly doubt that." he paused, "but then again, religion is for the stupid." Their little group of nerds glanced around nervously at one another.
Hidan clenched his fists and pointed one towards the asshole. "Say that one more time, motherfucker." The silver pendant proudly hung over his chest, suspended on a black chord. It was of a religion Kakuzu did not recognize, but then again, he could only identify four, tops.
He sneered. "Did I hit a sore spot? I see you can't handle the truth about your own disillusion."
Hidan tried to spring over the table but surprisingly, one of the kids grabbed the back of his shirt.
"What the fuck!" he choked when he was yanked off the table's edge.
"I have wasted a whole fifteen minutes here and have learned absolutely nothing." he—Kakuzu couldn't remember his name—raged, "I have a test tomorrow! So STOP IT!" Everyone blinked. The boy who had yanked Hidan back blushed and sat down. "Sorry," he whispered, flustered.
Kakuzu cleared his throat and decided to actually start the tutoring session.
"And then the Spanish proceeded to-" Hidan paused, "Cool, it's 3:30."
"Wait, what did they do?"
"Try reading a damn book, 'cause I'm out." Hidan whistled. He hastily packed up all his things—which was really like three things—and literally pushed his chair over. "It's fucking raining like the sky's having its period." With one hand he quickly picked the chair back up and paused. He pursed his lips as if conflicted, "Alright, heathens, don't make me regret this. Anyone need a ride home?"
The group shook their head and politely thanked him, most of them pulled out their phones to call their parents. Kakuzu remained silent and quietly left. He cursed to himself because he usually walked home.
Just as Hidan said, rain was pelting the ground with a vengeance. The walk was about twenty minutes from the school. It didn't look like it was going to clear up soon. He pulled out his phone and tried calling Zetsu. Usually Pain would help him but after the little spat (which was proportional to the Cold War), they were playing a mix of a dominance and waiting game.
Kakuzu sighed and sat down against the wall. Zetsu hadn't picked up. Thankfully there was an awning over the cement bordering the media center. Little waterfalls poured from crevices and he watched lights flickering in layers of gray clouds.
The world seemed angry, as irrational as it sounded. It threw cold winds and rain and bolts of lightning around Amegakure. It was storming, as usual, and Kakuzu didn't know if he'd prefer snow. He's never seen inches of snow before (only sleet) but he'd imagine it to be expensive.
Kakuzu looked to his left and saw the offending voice. The other teen carried four books Kakuzu did not remember seeing him with before. But then again, Hidan was undeniably well-read in the field of theology and history. During their time together, he realized one of the book Hidan would refer to occasionally was worn with marked tabs. He would flip through it like an expert, barely glancing down as he pointed sections out to the freshmen. Enthusiastically pointing out sentences and expanding on them, showing the true depth of his knowledge.
Kakuzu hated it. He may be able to easily get a 2400 on an SAT but Hidan could write an encyclopedia on history.
"Yo, you listening?" Hidan walked towards him casually and stood by his massive feet.
"What do you want?"
"Hey man, I know you wanna—I don't know— eat my fucking guts or something, but you need a ride?"
"If you know I hate you, why are you even asking?"
"Dude, seriously? They're fucking called manners." Hidan snapped as he pulled a small, red umbrella from his bag.
"I need a ride."
"…" the other's purple eye twitched. His mouth was set in a firm line. Instead of replying, Hidan angrily stomped away through the rain. Kakuzu sighed and leaned his head against the wall. Like Pein, he wasn't planning to swallow his pride and run after Hidan. His green eyes closed, his ears quickly focused on the thunder. It was getting closer.
Kakuzu's eyes snapped open. To his utter surprise, Hidan's face was glaring at him through a closed window. He stood uncertainly—if this was a stupid prank, he'd murder Hidan. But as he approached the car (some generic, scratched-up five-seater) he trusted the silver-haired teen not to make a fool of him.
He got into the backseat, trying to hurry without looking hurried. The interior was neat and clean. His softly worn sneakers squeaked as they slid against the protective plastic mat on the floor.
"Alright, you ass-hat, don't fuck up anything in this car!" Hidan hissed before adding, "Cleanliness is godliness."
The stitch teen decided to keep his mouth shut until he remembered Hidan didn't know where he lived. So far, they've been heading in the general direction so he had forgotten. "I live in Jubilee Apartments. Turn left onto Rupert Av-"
"Woah, you serious? I live there too!" Hidan grinned at him and made brief eye contact through the rear view mirror, "I'm on the second floor!"
Kakuzu's eyebrows both raised, "I have never seen you around."
Hidan waved him off after he turned into the parking lot of the quaint, egg-shell apartment complex. It was rectangular with small balconies jutting out between every three windows. "Where you wanna get dropped off?"
"I'm towards the back."
"Jashin, how have we never seen each other?" he whistled as he parked his car. The rain hadn't calmed since they left the library, so Hidan instructed Kakuzu to reach behind his seat and he found a black, larger umbrella. Family sized.
Kakuzu shrugged, finding it a tad odd himself. "I have a free period first, so I leave a later. But that wouldn't explain why I've never seen you around before." He opened the door and quickly opened the door before any water could get into the spotless car. Together, they walked into the building, only pausing to unlock the door into the hallway.
"I moved in a few weeks ago." Hidan explained, "And before you ask, I moved here for reasons."
He raised a dark eyebrow, "I wasn't planning to, and that answer makes me wish you didn't guess stupid things." They moved up the stair and Kakuzu decided it was too late to be surprised anymore.
Hidan spluttered and said sarcastically, "Well, sorry! Most people fucking ask! I woulda asked."
"Don't compare me to idiots."
It took a moment before Hidan realized the jab, "What the fuck! I consider mys—Oh! This is me." Kakuzu didn't know whether to keep walking or wait for Hidan to dismiss him. He usually straight up ignored people who he wasn't on completely good terms with.
When the moron finally pulled out his keys (two key chains: unsurprisingly, his cult symbol and a plastic picture frame) he turned to Kakuzu, "See you later, dickhead."
He grunted, "Same to you."
A/N: Soo, a lot different from what I typically write, whenever I try to write even semi-seriously, I feel like I over do it. I plan on this being like five chapters, so let's hope for the best! Please review or PM me if you got something to say-anything to say- and I'll reply with some kind of urgency. And I've also wanted to bend Hidan's religion to fit in today's world without being illegal. There might be some hunts of "A Walk to Remember" but considering I've never watched that movie, only heard some quotes, it prolly won't be noticeable.