A/N: Hi there! I can't believe it's done and I finished my take on Book Two of Breaking Dawn. It took a lot of time but it was a good time. I'm honored you all stayed with me this long. Although I was entertained by Jacob's POV, I was kind of annoyed that I had to witness something as important as the pregnancy through his eyes rather than Bella's or Edward's. That was my motivation to write this story. And now that part is finally done. Thank you all for sticking around.
I'm sorry to say that, from here on, updates will become a lot less frequent than they have been recently. For the past year I've been a stay-at-home-mom but last week I had to go back to work. So I have a lot less time to write than I had before. I'm still determined to finish this story, and it won't be finished until I reach the last scene where Edward can finally read Bella's mind. But I can't make you any promises as to when we'll reach that point. I hope you'll understand but real life's a bitch and interferes a lot with what I'd like to do. If this is any consolation, I have a very clear vision of what Edward is doing and feeling during Bella's transformation. I don't know yet, when I can deliver it to you, but I certainly will.
Now I won't keep you any longer from meeting Renesmee. Enjoy the chapter and let me know what you think. I hope to meet you here again, soon.
Disclaimer: Twilight's not mine, etc, ect.
Chapter 18 – Fighting death
The blood that had come like a fountain out of Bella's mouth had soaked her sweatshirt, leaving the front dark red. The scent of human blood was heavy in the air. Bella's face had gone blank with unconsciousness while her body didn't cease to twitch and spasm. Every convulsion was accompanied by the noises of bones breaking.
For the second time since discovering that Bella was pregnant, my body was rigid with shock. The thoughts of the people around me were a jumbled mess that I wasn't able to decipher in that situation. All I was seeing and hearing was Bella choking, while our baby was breaking her from the inside in a frantic fight for his life.
My paralysis lasted for a fraction of a second before I was finally able to move again.
"We have to get her upstairs. We need to deliver the baby. Now," Rosalie shouted at me before she raced up the stairs with Bella in her arms and me and Jacob close on her heels.
We followed her into the study where she put Bella down on the examination table.
"Morphine!" I said in a harsh tone while Rose was busy keeping Bella from falling off the table in her spasms.
"Alice — get Carlisle on the phone!" Rosalie screamed.
While I was preparing the syringe to analgize Bella, Rose was pinning her down, ripping her clothes out of the way.
I was totally on edge, hearing my child's terror in my head while looking at Bella's unconscious form in front of my eyes. It was a good thing that my mind was spacious enough to work properly while all those other thoughts were running through it. I took Bella's arm and injected the morphine directly into the vein in its crook.
"What's happening, Edward?" Jacob asked in a terrified voice.
"He's suffocating!" I answered curtly.
Having a degree in medicine just like me, Rosalie knew at once what had happened. "The placenta must have detached!"
All of a sudden, Bella seemed to come to. With her eyes blinking wildly, she looked at me panic-stricken.
"Get him OUT!" she demanded in a shrill scream. "He can't BREATHE! Do it NOW!"
I wanted nothing more than to comply but it was too soon. She would still feel the pain of being cut open.
"The morphine —," I began to growl but her frantic voice cut me off.
"NO! NOW —!" She wasn't able to get another word out because another wave of blood spilled from her mouth.
I rushed to her head, lifting her upper body from the table to prevent her from choking. In my peripheral vision I noticed Alice rushing into the room, attaching something to Rosalie's ear. A second later, she retreated, walking backwards out of the door. I'm so sorry. The smell … the sight … oh Bella, I'm so sorry, I can't.
I tuned her out again. If she couldn't handle the situation then it would be better to have her out of the way.
"Carlisle, the placenta has detached. We must deliver the baby now. What do we do?" Rosalie's word were spoken so fast that they were almost merged into one.
"Make a horizontal incision of about eight inches width on the level of her hipbones," Carlisle instructed through the earpiece.
She grabbed a scalpel and touched the blade to Bella's abdomen, just above her pubic hair. She was about to press it down when I grabbed her hand to keep her from making a cut.
"Let the morphine spread!" I ordered her in a harsh tone.
"There's no time. He's dying!" she answered through clenched teeth.
I knew she was right but I didn't want to cause Bella such enormous pain. Without heeding my warning, Rosalie changed the angle of the scalpel a little, and the blade cut into Bella's skin. As soon as she had broken the surface, blood spurted from the little wound. Bella showed clear signs of pain but wasn't able to vocalize them as she was still choking on the blood she was vomiting.
My eyes were on Bella's deathly pale face, feeling the fear rise inside me, as I realized that Rosalie wasn't proceeding with the caesarean. I turned to look at my sister, who was frozen in place, her eyes locked with the blood-red scalpel in her hand, her gaze strangely unfocused.
I had to give it to her, the scent of the blood spilling from Bella's wound was much more potent than that from the conserves she had been drinking for the last days. And considering it was Bella's blood, it was delicious and tempting. Not nearly tempting enough for me to loose focus on my struggling wife and child, but Rosalie was fighting the urge to just drink Bella's blood. Her natural instincts made her take up an attacking stance, with her lips pulled back from her teeth and her eyes black with thirst. Her conscience was warring with her craving. Her thoughts started to lean towards giving into her nature, and I had to stop her.
"No, Rose!" I shouted, but I couldn't physically stop her as I was still lifting Bella's upper body to keep her from choking.
Jacob had noticed the change in Rose as well and reacted at once, throwing himself at her. He pushed her toward the door, and the two of them wrestled for a short time until Jacob knocked her into the door frame, breaking her earpiece in the process.
Alarmed by the noises, Alice appeared in the hall.
"Alice, get her out of here!" I ordered. "Take her to Jasper and keep her there! Jacob, I need you!" Alice took a hold of Rosalie's throat and dragging her out of the room without Rose even putting up a fight. The last thoughts I heard before concentrating on Bella again, were those of relief that she couldn't hurt Bella or the baby anymore.
As I looked at Bella again, I noticed the first signs of oxygen deficiency. Her skin was turning blue, and she had lost consciousness once again. The fear inside me was strangling but thankfully my medical training started to kick in, enabling me take charge. We needed to provide her body with oxygen to keep her heart beating until I could get the baby out and get the venom into her system.
"CPR?" I commanded in Jacob's direction.
"Yes!" he answered, glad to be able to help.
"Get her breathing! I've got to get him out before — " My words were cut off by a loud crack from inside Bella's body. A noise like that could only be produced by one of the big bones breaking. There was no reaction from Bella, and that moment I was grateful that she wasn't awake to feel the massive pain that had to go along with a fracture like that. Immediately after the noise, all movement in the lower part of her body ceased, only her bulge was still twitching with the frantically kicking baby.
"Her spine," I commented, and my voice broke over the words. Again, I was frozen in shock.
"Get it out of her!" Jacob growled, throwing the scalpel he had taken from Rosalie at me. "She won't feel anything now!"
As I noticed from the corner of my eyes that Jacob had started to ventilate Bella, I bent down, put the blade of the scalpel where Rose had already made the first cut, and holding my breath, I made an incision of about eight inches where her stomach met her loins.
Without wasting any time, I put the knife away and opened the wound, pulling the edges apart with my hands. I bent down further, and after taking a quick look at the stone-hard amniotic sac, I dove in, cutting the material with my razor-sharp teeth. I was so focused on saving my wife and child that I didn't even notice the sweet, mind-blowing taste of Bella's blood on my tongue. I had tasted it once before, but unlike then, I wasn't the least bit tempted to drink it. Right now, I was much too anxious for mundane desires like thirst.
My teeth on the vampire-skin-like material caused a screeching noise that made my hairs stand on end. As soon as the bubble was opened, a small hand, covered in red substance, grabbed my hand, holding onto it for dear life.
Somewhere in the back of my mind, I noticed that Bella had started to breath again.
"You stay with me now, Bella!" Jacob shouted at her. "Do you hear me? Stay! You're not leaving me. Keep your heart beating!"
I couldn't look up to see what was happening as I was working on freeing the baby from Bella's body. I stuck both my hands inside the opening and felt around until I was able to get a hold of the baby's head. Very carefully but quickly non the less, I freed first the head then the rest of the little body. Examining our child for a quick second, I saw that the small head was covered with quite long, dark hair, the eyes were the exact same color as Bella's and the little mouth was filled with a complete set of pearly white teeth. The baby's skin was pale but rosy and all ten fingers and toes were there — and she was a girl.
"Renesmee," I whispered in awe at the realization that we had a daughter. So Bella had been wrong after all. She had been sure we were going to have a boy. It didn't matter. The baby seemed to be healthy, and Bella had survived the delivery.
"Let me …," I heard Bella's hoarse murmur. "Give her to me."
My eyes met hers, and I noticed that they were blood-shot and glassy. I didn't hesitate before I moved the few steps toward her, placing the baby in her weak arms. I knew that I should proceed with starting her transformation, but I knew as well that this was a moment that every mother deserved. She had fought for this little creature for the past weeks, against massive resistance, and she needed this moment to connect with the person she was already loving so much.
"Renes … mee. So … beautiful." Her eyes that seemed unfocused before were now fixed on the little bundle in her arms. She was frighteningly weak, and I mustn't dare wait too long.
As I was allowing myself a moment to revel in the oh so natural picture in front of me, of my wife holding our baby, my marveling was interrupted by Bella's pained gasp.
Our daughter had put her little teeth to work, biting her mother. I quickly took the child away from Bella before she could cause any more harm.
"No, Renesmee," I chided softly, knowing that she was able to understand what I was saying. Her thoughts were very clear and at least as developed as they would be in a two-year-old.
All of a sudden and without any warning, Bella's heart stopped. My breath caught in my chest as the fear of losing her after all washed over me like a tidal wave.
Jacob reacted at once, compressing her chest in a steady rhythm to keep her blood circulating. After fifteen compressions, he ventilated her, before going back to making her heart pump. I watched his actions in a strange fascination while I was rigid where I was standing, Renesmee still in my arms.
"What are you waiting for?" Jacob's voice broke my daze. I notices that his eyes were filled with tears.
"Take the baby," I demanded. At once, I knew what I had to do, and I needed my hands free.
"Throw it out the window." He didn't even look up, stoically continuing to pump Bella's heart for her.
"Give her to me," Rose whispered from behind me.
I growled at her, in unison with Jacob, both of us remembering her reaction only minutes before.
"I've got it under control," she insisted. "Give me the baby, Edward. I'll take care of her until Bella …" She couldn't even say the words, remembering her own transformation. As obnoxious as my sister might be, I knew she had fought for the life of Renesmee alongside Bella over the past weeks. She would never do anything that could hurt our daughter.
I handed the little girl over to Rosalie and turned around at once, focusing on what I had to do next. I grabbed the syringe that Carlisle and I had prepared for an emergency and ordered Jacob away from Bella's chest.
Now was not the time for pleasantries.
"What is that?" he asked, still keeping up the CPR as his eyes were fixed on the syringe.
I couldn't waste any more time, and since he didn't seem to be inclined to take his hands away, I knocked them out of the way. Not really paying attention to the force I was using, I heard one of his fingers break. Although I was sorry for hurting him, there was too much at stake to dwell on it. Without any hesitation, I stabbed the needle through her skin, right into her heart, and injected the content, answering Jacob's question about what it was.
"My venom." Bella's heart reacted as if it had been electrocuted.
"Keep it moving," I demanded. The venom had to circulate through her whole body to begin the healing process. I was glad that the concentration on doing everything in my power to save Bella, pushed all emotions to the back of my mind. That way, the fear of losing her couldn't hinder me.
When Jacob started the cardiac massage again, I could hear that the viscosity of Bella's blood had turned thicker. It took him more effort to keep the circulation going, but I knew he could manage it.
Without paying much attention to his ministrations, I started to further the spreading of venom. To achieve that, I had to bring the substance into her vessels in as many places as possible. I started at her neck, carefully cutting her delicate skin with my teeth.
It felt like a lifetime ago that I had dreamed of sinking my teeth into her throat. At the time it was a very sensual phantasy. Now that I was finally doing what I had been denying myself from the second I met Bella, it was so very different from the way I imagined it. Yes, there was the sweet taste of her blood on my tongue but there was no frenzy, no rush, no need to suck her dry. Instead of the kiss of death, intending to take her life, this was an attempt to give her a new life, a proof of my love for her.
When the venom had seeped into her jugular, I pulled my teeth out, swiping my tongue over the incision to close the wound again. Repeating the process over and over again, I brought the healing liquid into several places along her arms, her legs and her femoral artery.
My mind was blank, pushing back the fear to keep myself calm, when slowly, Jacob's thoughts made their way to my awareness.
There's nothing here, just me, just him.
Working over a corpse.
That's what's left of the girl we both love. A broken, bled-out, mangled corpse. We can't put Bella together again.
Although his thoughts were completely hopeless, he didn't stop pumping her heart as I continued to bite and inject venom.
I know it's too late. I know she's dead. I know it because the pull is gone. I don't feel any reason to be here beside her. She isn't anymore. This body has no more draw to me. The senseless need to be near her has vanished.
Or maybe moved is the better word. It feels like the pull is coming from the opposite direction now. From downstairs, out the door. I so long to get away from here and never, ever come back.
I didn't understand how he could not feel that Bella was still here. I knew she was still with me, she had to be. She couldn't leave me alone. This had to work. But I could sense Jacob's desperation, and if he didn't feel the need to be here, then he shouldn't be.
"Go, then," I dismissed him in a harsh tone, roughly pushing his hands out of the way again, so I could take his place, keeping Bella's heart going. This time I heard at least two bones break, but I didn't care.
A bit of Jacob's despair got to me, and I knew that I was setting a faster rhythm than he had. Then again, the heart usually races during the transformation.
"She's not dead," I growled. "She's going to be fine."
I didn't pay attention to Jacob anymore. Eventually he left, leaving me alone with Bella in my frantic attempt to make the venom course through her body. It had to work out. As long as the blood was flowing through her veins, the healing could take place. If I had to, I'd pump her heart for the next three days until her transformation would be complete. If only she'd make it.
There were already slight changes taking place. Bella started to smell differently and very slowly the wound from the caesarean was beginning to close itself. To the human eye, these changes wouldn't even be recognizable. But still, the fact that her heart had stopped beating before I could bite her made the outcome uncertain.
I couldn't lose her. She had to survive. I needed her. Renesmee needed her. She couldn't just leave us like that.
"I love you so much, Bella. Come on. You have to help me out here." I began to talk to her, plead with her. I wasn't sure how much she could hear or understand. But it didn't matter. I needed to say all this much more than I needed her to hear it.
"Our baby needs you. I need you. Don't leave me. Please, don't leave me." I went on talking just to keep myself sane. Every thought in the house was drowned out by my overwhelming fear of losing what meant the most to me. Far in the back of my mind I noticed something going on downstairs but nothing mattered right now besides keeping the woman I loved alive.
I didn't know how much time had passed when, suddenly, with a few stuttering thuds, Bella's heart started to beat again. The irregular pumping quickly turned into a steady, racing rhythm. I had heard the sound before but never had it been like music in my ears, bringing back hope and assurance.
Exhausted and overwhelmed, I crashed down on a chair next to the examination table. Bella wouldn't leave me. Renesmee wouldn't lose her mother.
Now all it would take was time, a lot of pain on Bella's and a lot of strength on my part to see her through her transformation.
I listened to her frantically hammering heart, the most wonderful sound I had ever heard, that was making Bella change forever, to enable her to stay with me eternally.