A/N: Written as a birthday gift...back in February. I forgot to post it here until now.
Warnings: Non-explicit sexual situations, slash, two men and a baby (and just how that happened left up to the imagination)
The body beneath Severus was warm and inviting, and he could find no reason to complain about the mouth nibbling at his earlobe – though if he was honest, that mouth was not always so kind. One would think that a committed relationship would have tamed the endless verbal sparring, but one would be wrong. Infatuation (or love, as some sentimental fools would call it) did not whisk their differences away; it simply allowed more room to appreciate the similarities.
He slid his long fingers down Harry's toned chest to the waistband of his pants. 'Well, there are a few appreciable differences,' he smirked into Harry's ruffled hair at the thought.
Harry lifted his hips with a horrendous wail. Wait. What? 'Oh.' That horrendous wail hadn't come from Harry. It had come from the muggle torture device on the bedside table known as a baby monitor and concealed what Severus was sure was the most delectable moan.
Severus groaned and dropped his head against Harry's shoulder. This child had the most atrocious timing in the world. "It is crying again," he sneered.
"That's your child, Severus, stop calling her 'It'," Harry chastised. "Ah, wait, I think she's stopped."
Severus sighed his relief. The baby obviously had no concept of time. "I will stop calling it It, when it learns my name is not Ma-Ma."
Harry laughed at his insulted tone of voice. "She loves you."
"That remains to be proven," Severus replied sardonically.
"M-m-mamaaa! Ma-Maaaa!" The baby began wailing again.
"Don't you dare laugh," Severus glared down at his husband. Harry was already laughing. He was shaking with laughter, actually.
"Oh alright! I am going. I will silence that ungrateful child one way or another." Severus grunted and got out of bed, pulling his robe on and padding down the hall. Baby monitors, indeed. If one could not hear their own child crying within the confines of their own home, their home was obviously far too large and they were not nearly as attentive to their child's needs as they ought to be. As it was, Severus already had a migraine from the dual-audio. The fact his private time with his beloved was interrupted by the product of their affections did not help endear him to the child any further, not after midnight. He contemplated a sedative potion. It was not advised on babies so young, but it might be worth the risk if he ever wanted to sleep normal hours again.
Harry flopped back. Having a kid really did put a damper on one's sex life, but it would only be what? Eleven years before they had the fall to themselves? Harry sighed. He was going to have to either become really patient, or really creative; the latter was more likely. He could hear Severus open and close the door from the baby monitor. As smart a man as he was, Severus hadn't quite realized yet that the baby wasn't the only person he was spying on with that handy little muggle device.
"Oh for pity's sake, this is what's got you so riled up?" Severus complained at the child.
Severus picked the stuffed toy dragon off the floor – a gift from "uncle" Charlie, and leaned over the crib, shaking the foolish thing in her face. "Alright, already, you spoiled little thing. Be silent," he chided, but it was difficult to be truly angry when looking upon such an adorable little face. It was a good thing she hadn't inherited his looks. She had Harry's green eyes.
"Ma-Ma!" Pudgy fingers gripped his sleeve.
"Oh, alright, Lily. For pity's sake. I tremble at the thought of how much noise you will make once you learn actual words." He scooped the baby up and rocked her gently. "You have your doll now, child, be still."
"mamama," the baby cooed.
"Yes yes, of course, I love you, too, you mischievous little imp, but if you do not allow your parents a little alone time now and again, I may take that back when you're old enough to understand it." He settled her back in her crib with her favorite stuffed animal. "Bow your head now, little flower. The morning will come soon enough."
The baby cooed pleasantly, and after a few more minutes, Severus returned to the bedroom, dropping his robe on the floor and climbing back under the covers.
"Have I told you how much I love you today?" Harry asked, curling into the older man's chest – the burning passion of the moment had been ruined by their daughter's pure innocence, but there would be plenty of time for it later.
"At least fourteen times," Severus replied drolly. "And, on another point, don't think I can't read you like a book: you're using that wretched device to spy on me and make sure I don't manhandle our child."
"Not at all." Harry leaned up to kiss the older man gently. "I'm using it to spy on you and remind myself that the constant deluge of snarky commentary is all for show, and you're actually quite loveable."
"Maybe," Harry chuckled. "But, love makes fools of all of us, even you, 'Mama'."
"...the child isn't the only one I know how to silence, you know," Severus quipped.
"Then silence me," Harry dared.
'Oh,' Severus realized. There was that burning passion, right where he'd left it, in the empty space between Harry's arms and the spark of humor in those stunning emerald eyes. He had no intention of wasting it, so he lowered his mouth over Harry's, slid his fingers lightly down his torso, slipped his hand down toward the waistband of his husband's pants, and prayed upon any deity or demon willing to listen that fate would be kind enough to spare them from any further interruptions.
Fate, apparently, was a cruel and vindictive mistress. Severus groaned in despair and threw himself back against the pillows. Apparently, this was as far as they would be getting tonight.
"She just loves you so much," Harry laughed, leaning over and pressing a kiss to his husband's jaw.
"I wish she loved me a little less."
"Maybe we should let her sleep with us tonight."
"If we want any sleep at all, I don't see that we have much choice."
"I'll get her," Harry said, giving Severus a tame kiss before getting up. "Don't look so depressed. As late as she's up, she'll sleep half the afternoon tomorrow."
"And proceed to put us through this again tomorrow night," Severus reminded.
"Maybe," Harry answered from the doorway, "but we'll still have the afternoon."
The suggestive tone did not escape Severus's attention. Perhaps he had been premature in calling fate cruel. Only time could tell with any certainty.