I own nothing. This was a silly idea that made me giggle whilst listening to the song. Hope u like just a funny one shot I wrote coz I can't sleep! Check out my other Rizzles stories if you like this. Twitter jdroxburgh x feedback always welcome. This is pre-rizzles set in the show.


Gay Bar.

It was lunchtime and Homicide Detective Jane Rizzoli had plans to meet her best friend Medical Examiner Doctor Maura Isles and go out for lunch. As Jane entered the café she noticed it was far busier than normal and there were rainbow flags and banners everywhere. She frowned and was manhandled and bombarded by her Ma.

Angela was brimming over with excitement "Isn't this great Janie?"

"Um...yeah...Ma what's going on?" Jane looked around her perplexed.

"It's something I organised through the community, it's a celebration and gathering of the" she looked up at a banner "LGBT community, to show that the police aren't prejudiced!"

Jane sniggered "And free coffee is gonna do that?"

Angela socked her on the arm "Don't laugh Janie! This is a positive step for the" she looked up again "lesbian, gay, bisexual and trans...trans...I always forget that one!"

Jane shook her head "Transgender Ma."

"Whatever!" Angela waved her hand in the air "Anyway it's great! These people are lovely! Plus that handsome guy over there just gave me his number!" She nudged Jane with her elbow.

Jane looked over and groaned "Ma...that's a woman."

Angela frowned at her "What?" She looked over. "No!"

Jane sniggered "Trust me Ma, the breasts are a bit of a giveaway!"

Angela stared at her admirer in shock. Maura entered the café and was accosted by a tall woman as she entered. Jane glanced over and panicked, she ran over and grabbed the ME roughly by the elbow and dragged her over to Angela.

"Ow! What?" Maura rubbed her elbow frowning at the detective.

"Trust me you'll thank me later!" Jane was glancing around nervously.

"I won't if I get a hematoma." The medical examiner stated sulkily. Both Rizzolis turned and stared at her blankly, she sighed "A bruise."

Jane was about to retort when a song blasted loudly from the radio. Jane's eyes widened in shock with immediate recognition and she turned to Angela open mouthed.

You! I wanna take you to a gay bar,

Angela stared at her daughter frowning "What?"

"Please, please tell me this is just the radio and a horrible coincidence and not something you picked out to play Ma!"

"What? I did some research into their kind of music! I wanted them to feel at home."

At the gay bar, gay bar, gay bar.

Jane looked mortified. Maura frowned at her confused "What's wrong Jane?"

"Nothing, nothing! Ma is just a stereotypical dumbass!"

Angela and Maura spoke at once "Language Jane!"

Maura was still baffled "I don't understand. What's wrong with the song?"

Jane opened her mouth to retort but simply pointed to the radio indicating to listen.

I've got something to put in you,
I've got something to put in you,
I've got something to put in you,
At the gay bar, gay bar, gay bar.

Maura shrugged her shoulders "I don't see the problem!"

Jane groaned "This is an LGBT gathering-"

"Lesbian, gay, bisexual and trans...trans...transformer?"

Jane face-palmed herself at her Ma and grumbled under her breath "Yeah Optimus Prime is due any second."

"What?"

Jane shook her head "I give up! This is a nightmare, an actual nightmare and I'm gonna wake up any second!" She began pinching her arm.

Maura tutted at her "You're overreacting!" She turned to Angela who was still muttering to herself "I think you mean transgender."

Angela clapped "Yes! That's it!"

Maura turned to the younger brunette who was holding her face in her hands "I don't see how the song is inappropriate, it's just about asking someone to frequent a homosexual club."

Jane looked at the ME through her fingers, she was deadly serious. She dropped her hands to her hips "I've got something to put in you...that's not inappropriate?"

Maura looked at the detective earnestly "No. It could mean any number of things."

Jane sighed "Yeah but it doesn't!"

"You don't know that! You can put your time in somebody." Maura said innocently. "You can pu-"

"Maura! Stop!" Jane placed her hands on the medical examiner's shoulders.

"What?"

"It's clearly not about that and I really don't wanna talk about it anymore!"

Maura sighed "I just want to understand why you deem these lyrics inappropriate to lesbians?"

Jane blinked at her. "What?"

Maura wasn't listening to her and was thinking again "It could be an expression of love. Putting your love into someone, that's an expression isn't it?"

Jane was exasperated "Wait, no! I'm not gonna touch that one!" She shook her head "Why lesbians?"

Maura frowned "What?"

"You asked why I thought it would offend lesbians? There aren't just lesbians here...and it's a guy singing...I highly doubt he's singing to a lesbian!" She sniggered.

Maura was shocked and had no answer "Oh...I have no idea..." She began racking her brain for an answer.

Angela grabbed Jane by the shoulder "Janie! There's someone here I'd like you to meet! This is Alex!" Jane turned around and gasped in horror as she faced one of her dates from the undercover op at Merch, the blonde one with curly hair. "She says you two have already met?"

Jane smiled nervously "Um, yeah...hi" she begrudgingly held her hand out and the blonde took it willingly, she tried to hold on to it but Jane pulled back sharply "Volleyball." She winced as she used the same excuse as before.

"Alex here was telling me how much she was hoping to run into you here as she hadn't been able to contact you!"

The blonde was making eyes at her again and Jane swallowed nervously "Yeah...real shame..." She elbowed the ME who still seemed lost in her thoughts.

Maura was knocked back into the conversation and she thrust her hand out "Hello, I'm Do-" Jane jabbed her again and she cleared her throat "Maura."

Alex frowned at the medical examiner "Nice to meet you...you look kinda familiar were you at Mer-"

"Yes!" Jane interrupted loudly, an idea suddenly clicking in her mind. She slid an arm around Maura's waist and pulled her into her body.

Maura immediately reacted to the detective's touch and went into full LLBFF mode, rubbing her hands over Jane's arms and swaying lightly with her, leaning her head back into Jane's chest.

Angela turned back to see Jane and Maura cuddling each other and acting very strangely, she frowned at Alex who didn't seem happy and stalked off. She turned back to ask Janie what that was about when Jane let go of Maura and Vince, Barry and Frankie all walked in.

"Hey Ma what's goin' on?" All three men began to make their way over but not before each of them caught sight of the woman near the doorway who had spoken to Maura.

The three women shook their heads at the three men and sniggered under their breaths, none of them wanting to reveal that she wouldn't be interested in any of them.

The men started a cock fight about who the woman would pick.

"You kiddin' me grandad? Ain't no way she gonna go for an older model when she can have this!"

Korsak scowled at Frost "You know what they say! Can't beat a classic!"

Frankie laughed at them both "You know women love a guy in uniform!"

All three stood up straight and started to nudge each other as the women stood up and began to make her way over. Angela, Jane and Maura were on the verge of crying with laughter.

The woman sauntered over with a napkin in her hand, she made a beeline for Maura. She slipped the napkin into her hand as she bent down to whisper in the ME's ear.

The three men were stunned as they watched the beautiful woman ignore them and go to Maura. They each gulped in turn at the thought of them together.

Maura blushed furiously at the suggestion that the woman had just implied. She reached out and grabbed Jane's hand but it didn't deter the woman as she leant in for a kiss.

Jane felt Maura grab her hand frantically and saw the woman lean in. Jane stepped in and pulled Maura away giving the woman an absolutely filthy look. She stroked Maura's cheek softly and the ME looked up at her with those with big hazel eyes. "You ok babe?" Jane's voice took on a huskier tone than normal and Maura simply nodded. "Come on. Let's go for lunch" she took Maura's hand in hers and just in case the woman hadn't got the hint yet she leant in and placed a gentle kiss on the ME's lips.

Maura was stunned as she felt Jane's soft lips brush against her own. She felt the brunette tugging at her hand as she lead them out of the cafe and she followed, lips still tingling.

Angela, Korsak, Frankie and Frost just remained staring at the doorway through which the two women had just left. They slowly turned to look at one another, bewildered at what had just happened.

"Wha...what?" Was all that Frankie managed to utter. The other three shrugged their shoulders.

"I guess they support lesbians, gays, bisexuals and transformers..."

All eyes turned to frown at Angela.

The End.