Finally I've had time to post this. Sorry it's taken me so long. I've had to deal with...issues in the family. I hope you enjoy the first chapter!
"Lois and I are getting married."
Donna gasped while Diana clenched the table so hard it cracked under her grip. Forcing a smile, she said, "Oh, that's wonderful news, Kal. I'm so happy for you."
Shayera knew that was a lie. "We all are, Clark. When did you propose?"
"I propose to her last night, and she said yes. We're planning on getting married by the end of this month."
Diana tried her best to keep her jaw from trembling as she felt hot tears sting her eyes. Underneath the table she felt Donna squeeze her hand in comfort while Shayera placed a hand on her leg.
Months had passed since Donna was rediscovered, as well as the knowledge of the Amazon sisters' status of the daughters of Zeus. Both had developed in powers since then: In addition to superhearing, Diana also had strength and speed that rivaled Clark and Flash respectively, and superbreath, also like Clark. She found the last one out by sneezing during a dust storm during a mission. It took hours to get Donna out of the ice.
Donna was finally showing new powers as well she had weaker versions of Diana's powers, but still harbored jealously from Diana being stronger of her. But with each passing day, that jealously dwindled down to nearly nothing.
Clark turned to Diana, suddenly feeling nervous. "Di, I want you and Donna to come to the wedding. I know it may be a little difficult for you, but please come, even if for a moment."
For a fleeting moment Diana thought he said that because of his feelings for her, but realized it wasn't. He didn't love her the way she knew she did him. Over the months, she had to listen how he'd met Lois Lane at his job at the Daily Planet and started dating, and afterwards she would always go to the training room for hours on end. Donna and Shayera noticed this pattern but could not stop her. She was doing everything on her own.
That wasn't it, either—the sisters' mother, Hippolyta, was finally caught by Hera a week prior. She had done the cruelest joke ever to Diana: She turned Hippolyta into clay, mimicking the legend of how Diana was born. Even the Amazons weren't left out and turned to snakes.
Yet she never showed a single tear. While Donna cried herself to sleep for a couple of nights, Diana just had an emotionless expression on her face, locking her feelings away behind a stoic wall. She had to be strong for Donna, she kept telling herself. She knew how it felt to see an elder loved one cry and only be able to hold them. It made her feel completely helpless, and she didn't want Donna feeling the same way.
"Of course Donna and I can come," Diana said. "And it won't be for just a moment. I want to see you on your happiest day, Kal. I want to see just how happy you've become with Lois."
While Clark smiled, both Donna and Shayera winced. They knew the words were true, but it was becoming too much for Diana, who was now starting to shake.
"Thank you, Di," Clark said. "Lois is just dying to meet you. Perhaps I can take you by later on today?"
Donna had to grab Diana's arm to keep her from shaking more. "Of course, Kal. I would love to see your lucky soon-to-be bride."
He smiled again, and the tears grew even more. Couldn't he see that he was hurting her?
No, he didn't, or else he would not be saying these things to her. She could barely keep the tears back and hoped that Clark would stop talking soon, or else she'd have to walk out herself.
Clark shook his head. "No, that's all." He gave each of them a hug. "See you later."
As soon as Clark was out of their sight, Diana stood up, walking briskly to her room. Her room was her safe place, where nobody could disturb her. Recently she had a dense metal added into the interior of her walls so that she could not hear anyone outside of it. Beforehand, she'd often have a hard time falling asleep, but now she could sleep without a problem, so to speak.
Also, it kept Clark from hearing her anymore.
Just as she made it out of the doorway, she felt two sets of hands on her. "Diana," Shayera said softly, "are you alright?"
"I'm fine." She tried to pull away, but the hands wouldn't allow it.
"You're a horrible liar," Donna said. "We both see you're not alright."
"I will be fine, now let me go."
They spun her around so she was facing them. She was trembling, unshed tears in her eyes. Donna grabbed Diana's arm. "It's okay if you want to cry," she offered.
Once again, Diana spun away from them. "I am telling you, I am fine. I don't need condolence from my little sister or my best friend." She started walking away again.
"Donna told me about Themyscira."
Diana froze. The memories flashed through her mind like lightning, how she and Donna were going there for her mother's birthday, only to find every single Amazon turned to snakes, while Hippolyta herself was a model of her helpless form, her arms outstretched and her face twisted in horror…
"You don't have to be strong anymore," Donna nearly whispered, slipping her arms around Diana's waist while pressing her face into her sister's back. "We understand. Remember what you told me when we found out about our father?"
Oh, she remembered perfectly. She remembered telling Donna that it was fine to show emotions, yet here she was, abdicating her own words, showing strength instead of sorrow. "Diana, you don't have to be Wonder Woman right now," Shayera said soothingly.
The words of comfort from Donna and Shayera were slowing proving to be too much for Diana to take. "I know I don't have to. I choose to. Now leave me alone." Once again she tried to walk away.
But Donna wouldn't allow it. "Why are you denying yourself relief? We know Clark's words cut you deep…"
"You know nothing!" Diana screaming, wheeling around so fast Donna and Shayera were caught off-guard. "What do you know about me? There are obviously differences between us!"
She was delirious from grief. "Diana…"
Diana wasn't listening. Turning sharply on her heel, she nearly flew at lightspeed towards her room, throwing herself inside the open door. The tears were barely held back at that point, but she still refused to let them fall. She was an Amazon, a warrior, a princess—an outcast to Clark's relationship.
Her vision was blurred heavily, but she still made out the image of her bed and collapsed on it, curling into a fetal position. Never had she felt so upset before, not even when she found about Lois and Clark's relationship. They had started out as friends, but it soon turned into something more.
And Diana sat there and smiled the entire time, while on the inside she was screaming.
Diana wiped at her eyes, knowing she'd never show weakness again. She hated the feeling, she hated anything having to do with vulnerability. Yes, she told Donna that vulnerability was okay, but couldn't help but feel like betraying her own words.
She clenched at her bed sheets, taking deep breaths to calm herself down. It wouldn't help to get worked up over something she could never have, would it? She just had to get used to Clark's decision and support him for it, even if it meant betraying her own feelings…
How she didn't hear Shayera and Donna come in she'll never know. "What?" she nearly growled.
Donna was unfazed by her sister's anger. "You know why we're here, Di."
Diana turned away from them. "Like I said, I don't need your comfort. I'm fine."
"That's a lie and you know it," Shayera argued. "Just look at you; you're like a child whose best friend move away. We know you're upset over Clark's relationship with Lois."
It hurt just to hear that name. "I appreciate your concern, but I am fine. What will make you two realize that?"
They looked at each other. "We want you to relieve the stress inside of you," Donna aid
"I'm not stressed."
Shayera, despite understanding everything, was starting to get irritated at her friend's stubbornness. "Diana, we know you are! You have a reason to be. You lost your entire home in a day, and now the only man you've had feelings for is getting married to someone other than you."
Diana didn't turn to face them at all. "You two won't leave me alone until I admit defeat, won't you?"
"We're not saying that," Donna said. "We know you won't admit defeat, but we want you to acknowledge it."
"I already have. My best friend is marrying someone that's not me. Isn't that acknowledging defeat then? I know I can't have him, and I never will."
Donna gazed at her older sister sympathetically, moving around so she could face her. "Di, we know it hurts, so why don't you just…"
"Don't even think about it! I am an Amazon, a princess, and a warrior! Since when does any of those three cry because they can't have something they want?"
Now Diana sat up, glaring madly at Donna. "No, don't try to reason with me. You know that I'm going to ignore you. As a matter of fact, why are you still here? Don't you and Shayera have monitor duty?"
With a sigh, Shayera grabbed Donna's hand, leading her to the door. "Fine, Diana, we get it, we'll leave for now, but we're not done talking. Do you understand me?"
Diana waved them away, lying back down on the bed. "Whatever. Just go."
As soon as the door closed, the tears returned. She badly wanted to let her anger out, but what good would it do her? It would not get her mother back, nor would it get Clark to be with her. No matter what she did, she was still lost.
Clark slid down next to Diana, who was sitting at a table in the cafeteria. She was there for a full hour, yet she didn't even touch her salad. Instead, she had her head bowed, as if something interesting was happening under the table.
Days passed since he'd told everyone about the news. Everyone was happy for him, but he had the feeling that, although Diana smiled and acted cheerful about it, that something else was going on. Her beautiful sky blue eyes now were dulled to a darker shade, and at times they appeared almost black. If he asked her if something was wrong she'd only smile and shake her head.
He was also aware of the insulator put into her walls recently. Not only did it block noise, but it also had the same structure of lead, which made it difficult for him to look through the walls as much as listen to her. But he knew it was to hide something. What, he didn't know.
When he took his seat, Diana didn't even bother to look up, or even acknowledge him being there. She kept her head down, shaking slightly. It took him a moment to realize that she was clutching a photo of her mother underneath the table.
"Di," Clark said softly, rubbing her arm, "is everything alright?"
It was scaring him, how the woman that would fight until the end despite hurting in every way possible was now suffering some kind of emotional turmoil and would not confide in him, her best friend, about it. Was he at fault? Did he do something to make her this way?
Slowly, Diana said, "Not now, but I'll be fine."
Not now? "What happened? Do you want to talk about it?
She started shaking more, and Clark thought he'd crossed a boundary. "I'm fine," Diana insisted. "It's just some…foolish mistakes that I've done."
"Di, you're not fine. You've been sitting here for an hour looking at that photo of your mother." An idea came to him. "Did your mother do something else?"
Diana quickly shook her head. "No, no, it wasn't her. She did nothing wrong. She couldn't have done anything wrong."
"Why not? Oh, and did you tell her what I said I promised I'd do for her birthday?"
She suddenly tensed, and the photo in her hands slipped through her fingers. "I…didn't get the chance to tell her. She wasn't available."
"Oh, well, can you tell her for me next time? I want to prove to her that I'm worthy of being your friend."
Clark noticed that Diana tensed even more. Was it something he said? "O…okay, Kal, I will," she nearly whispered.
What was wrong with her? This was NOT the girl he was used to. No, she wasn't even a girl—she was a woman, his best friend. It was between him, her, and Bruce that made a tightknit bond. Even though Bruce was currently in Gotham, he always checked up on the Watchtower, mostly them.
"Di, I know there's something wrong," Clark said sternly. "Why won't you tell me?"
"Because I can't," she mumbled. "If I tell you, you'll hate me. I don't want you to die hating me."
By then she was shaking so much that he'd taken her into his arms, rubbing her back. Something was DEFINITELY wrong, and he was going to find out, no matter how long it took him.
Ah, love can make you oblivious, ne? As you can see, Diana went back on her own words, holding her pain inside of her. But with her homeland's death, her loneliness, and her dealing with Clark's marriage, will she survive? Find out soon!