A/N Ok. So I'm writing this simply because I did not like the way things turned out in twilight. Lol. Tough shit, I know. BUT NOT IN MY OWN LITTLE FANTASY WORLD. In this world Bella was still reckless, and in love with her vampire, but things dont go down the same the cliff edge. This change is one that will lead her to a completely different ending. Edward doesn't go into Romeo and Juliet mode, and so he doesn't have reason to come back to Forks…at least not for a while… *dun dun dun*
And this IS my first twilight fanfic out there, so you super fans should probably cut me a break if I make some stupid context error in regards to the general story line or characters. =/
Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight Saga characters. The ONLY thing I have any rights to is the plot line and S. Meyer ever helped a bit with that too. So, no suing me for copyright infringement, k thanks.
With that, let the story begin. My I will warn you readers, the first few chapters I tried to make the little 'mance between Jake and Bells continue on as slow and awkward as it was in the actual series. Didn't want to rush them, ya know? Jake said he had just needed another 6 months so I'm giving it to him; hopefully Miss Swan isn't a dumbass and doesn't let all that sexy beefcake go to waste. O.o
Well what are you waiting for? READ! And when you're done *reviewwwww*!
The wind whistled through the trees behind me and over the waves in front of me. I watched them crash against the rocks far below and felt like those waves and I had a lot in common. Edward had been gone for so long…and yet still I ached for him. Everywhere I looked I saw another memory from our past, and each time it was like being thrown against the rocks of the cliff, and exploding into a million pieces. It wasn't fair… He wasn't fair…. And I was stupid for ever believing I was good enough to keep him.
My foot nudged a rock off the edge of the cliff and I watched it plummet down and be swallowed by those waves. A picture of Sam and Emery taking the same path came to mind. They had lived…I would too… though I was beginning to wonder if I cared either way… I just wanted to see him again… and this was the only way I could do it… so why was I hesitating?
I moved a hand up to gently touch my chest and was amazed yet again to find that it was solid, and no hole was present where my heart would normally be; it ached like a huge hole should be there. Thank God for Jacob. I didn't think he could ever fix me, it was putting a band aid on a gushing wound, but I did want him to try. I wanted someone to try.
I found another rock with the toe of my sneaker and kicked it over the edge of the cliff. Poor thing… it would never climb back out of that churning water and return to the top of the cliff… it would never find its way back to where it belonged… I stepped up and let the toes of my shoes hang off the ledge.
I heaved a sigh and then gasped as a pair of huge arms wrapped around me and jerked me away from the cliff edge.
"Are you crazy Bella? Do you want to die?" Jacob hissed as he pulled me against his chest and growled into my hair.
"No…I just wanted to see…" I sighed. I hated talking about Edward to Jacob. It just led to us arguing and me defending the man who had left me behind like last week's garbage.
"No Bella. There's no good reason for this. You can't keep doing this. What the hell would Charlie and Renee do? What the hell would I do?" His crushing hug was starting to make it hard to breathe.
"Jake…I didn't do it…it's OK," I whispered and tried to wiggle from his arms.
"No. It's not ok. But there isn't a damn thing I can do about it... other than not let you out of my sight again…" He sighed and slowly released his grip. "So from now on I won't just protect you from that leech, but from yourself."
I sighed. "Jake. I'm not suicidal. And you can't protect me from everything."
He snorted, "I can try Bells."
He was relentless, and he deserved better than I could give. But he wouldn't listen to anything I said…thank god I had him… "Whatever."
He grinned and wrapped an arm around my shoulder before guiding me back towards where I had parked my truck. He wore his usual carefree smile but I could tell that I had scared him.
"Come on, let's get you home, and warm, and safe," he said and nudged me to the passenger side door.
"I'm always safe with you." I grumbled, "You won't even let me handle knives when I'm cooking."
He laughed and climbed into the driver's seat, "You would cut off a finger Bells! You can't even walk without finding something to trip on."
I huffed at him, but we both knew I wasn't mad at him. I could never stay mad at him long, even if I did have a good reason.
"Want to watch a movie? I rented the new werewolf flick, thought we could get a few laughs out it," he smiled over at me as he pulled back out onto the road and pointed us towards my house.
I smiled and nodded at him, but when he turned and looked back at the road I couldn't make myself do the same. I had liked his hair long but he was handsome both ways, with his beautiful skin, and his beautiful smile, and his beautiful body. It blew my mind that he wanted to be with me. He was like Edward…either one of them could get whatever girl they wanted without much effort. Too bad I was ruined.
"Stop staring Bells, you're making me nervous," he murmured and then chuckled as I blushed and jerked my eyes back to the road.
"I wasn't staring…" I mumbled quietly. Sadly we both knew I was lying.
Charlie wasn't home, but that didn't bother me. Had Jake not been here I would have felt the loneliness like knife to the chest; I wasn't good at being alone anymore. Thank God Jacob was here. I sighed; I was getting tired of thinking that.
He put the DVD that had been left on the table into the player and flopped on the couch. But when I raised by eyebrow he just grinned and said that he had been 'pretty confident' I wouldn't turn him down. I glared at his smirk and wandered into the kitchen. He was always hungry.
By the time I had made the two of us four sandwiches, of which I would only be eating one; he had the movie paused and ready to play. He smiled warmly at the food and I, and patted the couch next to him.
I sat down and scooted over till our sides touched, not enough to encourage his already determined self but just enough that I could soak up some of his heat and temporarily not be frozen inside.
He munched happily on the food and I nibbled my own. Within twenty minutes the movie had already started being ridiculous with its grotesque hairy monsters that looked nothing like my Jacob, and I was starting to doze off.
I awoke to find that I was no longer sitting up next to Jacob, but sprawled across the couch with my head on his lap and his hand resting comfortably on my upturned shoulder. I coughed and sat up; being in that close of proximity with him always made me a little nervous, and a little depressed.
"You passed out, and I didn't have the heart to wake you." He raised his arms over his head and stretched while yawning. I caught myself wishing he had forgotten to put a shirt on again so I could watch his muscles flex with the movement.
I shook myself and looked at the floor, "Yeah…"
"Stop making that awkward face Bella. You don't ever have to be awkward with me. Just relax and do or say whatever feels right. Easy as breathing," He smiled warmly at me.
Why did I always feel like he was waiting for me to blink profoundly and suddenly tell him I loved him and I had been crazy all this time? Why did it always bother me that I couldn't give him what he wanted? Why was he always smiling!
"Sorry," I glanced at the clock on the DVD player and sighed. "It's like 2 am. You should probably head home before Charlie sees you or Billy misses you."
"Charlie already did. He smiled, patted your head, and told me to move you upstairs when the movie was done. Then he told me if my hands did any wandering on the way he would put them into handcuffs for me." Jake laughed like it was the funniest thing he had ever heard, and I stared at him open mouthed.
"And as for Billy, ever since my first phase I have been coming home pretty late or not at all. So he doesn't mind." He had all the answers.
I rolled my eyes. "Fine. You can sleep on the couch. I'm going to bed."
He smiled at me, "I will. And if anything that wants to hurt you gets anywhere near this house, I'll show it how the natives like to play."
I sighed heavily at his dramatic efforts and he laughed again. It must be lovely to have so much to laugh about.
"Goodnight Bells," he stood and gave my hand a soft squeeze before giving me a nudge towards the stairs.
I gave him a little smile and mumbled a 'night' in his direction, and then I trudged up the stairs and into my bedroom. The bed was cold…and my heater was sleeping on the couch. I sighed and imagined the cold sheets were alive and male, and pale with golden eyes.
Again I awoke to a surprise. Someone was shaking me and saying my name over and over, and though this much was not new to me, the face in front of me was. Charlie was nowhere in sight and Jacob filled my vision.
"You were screaming…" he whispered, brows drawn together in worry, "and you're crying…"
"I'm sorry…I…didn't mean to wake you…" I heaved out the words between sobs. Why were the nights always so horrible?
Jacob sighed, "Don't you dare apologize to me for having a bad dream. Scoot over."
I didn't have the will to argue, nor to move, "Jake…"
He didn't seem bothered as he slid his arms under my back and legs and scooted me over to the other side of the bed. I shivered as I was moved from my warmed up sheets to the cold ones, but he was quick to follow me down and smoothly slide under the sheets next to me.
"Y…you can't…sleep with me…" I cried softly at him as his warm arms wrapped around me and he pulled me up against his chest.
"Shhh…" he whispered as he wiped my cheeks free of tears and petted my hair out of my face. "Stop worrying and let me protect you from those nightmares. Stupid dream catcher…must be faulty."
I almost…ALMOST…smiled. He would protect me from the dreams, of that I was sure, but I doubted I would ever stop worrying. "Thank you…Jake"
He tucked another wayward strand of hair behind my ear and smiled down at me, "Well there's no need to thank me. I mean, I'm already getting a pretty good deal here."
I smacked him on the shoulder and then pressed my face into the hollow of his neck, "Tomorrow I'm going to be mad at you for this."
"Tomorrow, I will be so well rested and content I won't mind it a bit," he whispered cheekily back, and my eyes started to slowly fall shut again, still wet from my tears.
As my consciousness lost the battle again and I started to drift off, I could have sworn I heard him whispering softly over me, in a voice so low I could barely hear it. What words I thought I could make out weren't English…but something deep inside me told me they were powerful words; words that could protect me from anything. Words that were reserved for loved ones. Oh Jacob…
The next time I woke up it was morning, and Jacob was gone. His scent was on my pillows and his warmth still surrounding me, and I could almost still feel his arms around me.
I stretched and got up, heading for the bathroom while noting that I hadn't dreamed again after he had crawled into my bed. Too bad I still owed him a glare for that. He knew I couldn't handle being close to anyone yet…that was probably even the reason he had left before I had woken up, that or
Charlie's lingering threat about handcuffs. I smiled a bit and climbed into the shower, already making plans to head over to his house when I was done.
Billy smiled and waved me inside only a moment after I had knocked on the door. I gave him a soft smile back.
"He's out back in the garage," Billy said and moved back over to watch TV.
"Thanks" I said and followed my usual trail to the garage where I could find Jacob 80 percent of the time.
"Morning beautiful," he said before I had even stepped a foot inside the garage.
I stumbled on a nonexistent car part on the floor at his comment and then frowned at him, "Don't call me that! And no more sneaking into my bed when my mind is all slow from sleep!"
He laughed and grabbed a tool before rolling back under the car he was working on, "Whatever you say Bella."
I grumbled at him, and sat down in my usual spot. My backpack and homework were still here from the day before. Thank goodness it was the weekend and I hadn't needed it. Grudgingly I pulled out one of my books and a pencil, I'd almost rather be coated grease and under the car with Jacob.
Billy brought a pizza in for us before announcing that he was heading off to go fishing with Charlie and that Embry had called for Jacob.
Jake went in the house to call his packmate back and I started in on the pizza.
By the time he got back I had eaten a whole piece and a half, which was impressive for me.
"What did he want?" I asked and handed him the box.
He sat down on the floor next to me and started to eat, "Sam wants to talk to the pack, so you're coming with me to Emily's. I can't leave you unattended."
I wrinkled my nose. "I'm not three Jake."
"Whatever you say Bella," He smiled at me and finished his second slice.
It took only another ten minutes for me to finish my second piece and him to finish the rest. I laughed and poked him in the stomach, then we got into my old truck and left.
The ride to Sam and Emily's place was a quiet one, but neither of us minded. The weather was in one of its rare warm and sunny moods, our windows were down, and the sound to the wind rushing through the trees and around us was enough to keep us both content.
We pulled up in the driveway of the packs leader's home a good fifteen minutes later; my hair was rebelling and Jake was smiling. What did I have to miss? Or who?
"Good to see you Bella, Emily's got some lunch ready inside if you're hungry," Sam said as he walked up to us and gave Jake a pat on the back. I nodded at the two of them and wandered into the house as the other boys started to collect outside.
God Emily's cooking smelled good. I had just eaten two slices of pizza but I could already feel my stomach sitting up and paying attention. It didn't matter what she cooked, it was all amazing. The woman was a domestic goddess, and what's more impressive, she was surrounded by boisterous young wolves who never stopped eating-and yet no one ever went hungry and no meal was ever prepared halfheartedly. I didn't know how she handled it. "Need any help?" I asked as I moved over to her side to see what she was cooking.
She smiled at me and I found myself thinking she was beautiful, even with the scar…something about being happy and in love really made a person's inner beauty shine out…. I swallowed the thought of how I must appear to people and started carrying the food she handed me over to the table.
"So how are things going Bella?" she asked with a smile as she followed me to the table with a huge bowl full of mashed potatoes.
I smiled at her and gave her the customary "Good, and you?"
She started to reply but was drowned out as the boys started pouring into the room while talking loudly and shoving at each other.
Embry smiled and opened his mouth to say hi only to get cut off and pushed out of the way as Paul jumped into a seat at the table. Jacob smiled at me and sat down.
The others followed suit, and once they were all seated a small amount of chaos left the room and Sam walked in, looking a bit more somber than usual.
"Jake, I wanted you and Bella to come so that we could give you a heads up on what's going on with the red headed Leech," he said as he sat down, referring to Victoria. I sat up straighter and gave him all my attention.
"She seems to have caught on that we always have Bella under our protection, and she has started trying to distract us." He sighed, "Both Embry and Jared have scented her skulking around their homes…meaning we now have a lot more people to protect. She has successfully divided our attention."
The boys now seemed more like men as they all nodded solemnly; even Jake looked more grown up. I watched his jaw clench and had the oddest urge to soothe the tension from him. Everyone was quite for a few moments, and then surprisingly Jake spoke first.
"We need to find her," he said softly, not meeting anyone's eyes. "Make her believe we have eased off Bella and pretend to rush off to someone else's house one night, she'll know since she follows us all intermittently… she won't ignore an opportunity to hurt Bella… and when she shows up we can finish it."
Sam reached over and squeezed his shoulder. None of the others would have suggested using me as bait, they all knew how Jacob would react, it just proved how desperate he was that he had come to the same conclusion. I felt like a huge thorn in the side of the entire pack.
"You will have to be one of the ones to leave her Jake," Sam said. "If the leech sees that we have all disappeared but doesn't see you actually go, she will think that you have stayed…anyone would."
"Yea…we can't leave Bella completely alone," he said softly, meeting my eyes for a second before looking away again.
Sam nodded, "We will need someone who appears weak to stay, so the leech will make her move. Perhaps one of us could take one for the team, and get a couple of wounds to stir up the scent of blood."
I was surprised when Paul was the first to speak, "I'll do it…"
The boys fell into serious planning mode and I faded back into my own mind. I would have been dead long ago if the pack hadn't been there for me when…He...Edward had left me, to 'protect me', and yet in leaving me he had done all but try and kill me himself…he should have known…he should have stayed…
Jacob's thigh brushed mine under the table and my heart skipped a beat, which in turn made me blush. God, I couldn't touch him at all without getting flustered. Several of the boys glanced at me, a knowing smirk on their faces and I had the sinking feeling that they had all heard my betraying heart stutter.
A strong hand gave my knee a soft pet, and I looked up at Jacob and found him looking away and appearing deep in conversation.
By the time the small mountain of food had been eaten, the plans had been set. Jacob would stay part of the night with me, until a few of the pack rushed in, informed him that Victoria's scent had been picked up outside one of their homes and that they were going after her, and then a wounded Paul would offer to stay with me since he wouldn't be much help in the actual fight. It was a good plan, but it all hinged on the theory that Victoria would be close enough to hear their conversation, and smell the blood. I was worried it wouldn't work, but the fact that each of the boys was very confident that she would be within hearing and seeing range made me worry more… How often was she following me? Watching, and waiting for a chance to strike? No wonder Jake was so keen on me being with a member of the pack at all times…
They all said their goodbyes and started to split up. Jake and I would go back to my house, the others would go scouting, and then have a Paul-beating session. They would be at my house around one in the morning.
Jacob was quiet on the drive back to my house, and finally I gave in and broke the tension.
"What are you thinking?" I mumbled, studying his face for any hints.
He sighed, "That if I had protected you better it wouldn't have come to this. The leech would already be gone, and you could relax and be happy… instead I have to leave and let her get so close to you that it makes me feel sick."
I blinked; every time I thought that I had him figured out he showed some new side of himself and threw me off again. "You don't have to…we could figure out another way."
He snorted and looked at me with eyes that were much older than either one of us actually was, "Don't be naïve; she won't stop until she gets what she wants. And I'm not going to let her hurt any of my people, ever again. I'm tired of it, this ends tonight."
My throat was suddenly so dry I had to cough, his words were so final….I didn't want him to go… I had such a bad feeling that Victoria would get what she wanted in the end, she would kill my Sun, and so I would die too, and maybe somewhere it might ruffle one of Edward's feathers…but probably not. I turned and looked out the window at the passing scenery, my mind racing faster than the Rabbit back to my house and even further into tonight's future.
We climbed out of the truck when we got to my house and Jake smiled at me, "Stop that pouting, after tonight everything will be better. You should be smiling."
"I'll smile when it's over and you're safe" I mumbled under my breath.
He stopped walking towards the house and looked at me. I sighed; I had forgotten that he could hear EVERYTHING. "What would you do to have me alive and walking back to you tonight, sleeping next to you?"
I answered truthfully, "Anything...minus the sleeping next to me part."
He smiled but his eyes reflected just how serious he was, "Even give me something to live for?"
My breath caught, oh no…he was going there…again…what was I going to do? My mind wanted me to yell no and run inside my house, but my heart ached so much at the thought of him dying for me that I stayed…and nodded. "What do you want?"
"I want a kiss Bella." He watched me, his eyes boring into mine, "A REAL kiss, no fucking peck that you would give a brother or your dad."
I gasped and instantly saw an image of his lips on mine in my mind, "I…I…"
He moved closer, invading my space and then grabbing my shoulders before I could step back, "I'm asking for one kiss. Not sex. Not your heart. Not even a damn piece of it. Is it really that high of a price? Are your kisses so revered that no mere mutt can have a single one?"
He wasn't talking like my Jacob. I could feel his anger skating across my skin and burning me everywhere it touched. "No…"
"No what, Bella. No I don't get it or no it's not too much to ask for?" He demanded; his lips already so close to mine that I was having trouble processing anything.
"No, it's not too much to ask!" I cried out and jumped against him to smash my lips gracelessly against his. It hurt me, and I knew that it would probably hurt even more later. Still I sat there for a minute, it was the first time I ever initiated a kiss with someone and I was doing a terrible job of it.
His rumbling laughter vibrated his chest against me and moved his lips over mine. I pulled back about the time his arms wrapped around me, though he let me move my face back. I pulled one of my arms out of his hug to wipe my face, "Just…just come back safe." My hand was shaking…and I quickly lowered it.
He smiled, "I will and when I do, I will get my kiss. And you will let me lead, at least until you relax and start to enjoy it."
I frowned and wiggled out of his embrace, "You just got your kiss."
He shook his head, "No, I believe the kiss was meant to be a reward, something for me to strive for. Meaning it happens AFTER I come back. Are you giving me a reason to stay safe or not?"
I sighed and started to bite my lip, only to wince when I tasted blood. I had split my lip kissing him, and he had laughed. My cheeks burned red, "You're a jerk. But yes, you have your reason. I will ENDURE one kiss."
He ignored my barb and smiled so brightly that my heart fluttered and I forgot what the hell I was irritated about.
"Race you to the couch," he whispered and took off.
"Damn it Jake," I mumbled and couldn't help but smile as I slowly followed him inside the house.
It was only four o'clock in the afternoon when we sat down and started a movie. Every hour until one o'clock would be hell for me.
After the movie I wandered into the kitchen and made and enormous load of spaghetti: two jars of sauce, two pounds of hamburger meat, two loaves of garlic bread, and an entire box of pasta. It wasn't as much as I wanted to give Jacob to keep his strength up, but it was all I had in the kitchen. I'd make a bowl of salad too, just in case.
He came into the kitchen sniffing. "Hmm, I LOVE your spaghetti…" He snuck up behind me and snagged at piece of meat from the sauce before I could catch him.
I swatted his hand as he put it in his mouth, "You can wait ten more minutes!"
He rolled his eyes, "Bella I hope you are nicer than this to your kids; they will grow up anorexic and depressed."
As he walked off I could almost hear those kids laughing, a little boy perhaps, maybe a girl a little older…they would run in giggling. He would pull her hair an she would cry and run to me…then maybe I would let them both lick a spoon from whatever I was making to distract them…they would look up at me smiling with those big dark eyes… I froze. I couldn't think like that, I couldn't picture THEM like that…. with Jacob's hair and eyes and his sunny attitude.
I briefly tried to picture different kids, perhaps with a very pale complexion, and small pointy teeth that would sharpen when they got older…maybe even those oh-so-familiar golden eyes… I shivered before I could stop myself. They looked…terrifying.
Jacob nudged me, "Bella, I'm not much of a cook, but I'm pretty sure that if you keep staring off into space and ignoring the food that it WILL burn…"
I shook my head and tried to give him a smile. It didn't work, but I went back to cooking nonetheless.
Charlie walked in just as I was getting out the plates and sniffed the air, "Smells good honey."
Jacob grinned at him and handed him a can of beer, while sitting down with his glass of water and mine. Charlie nodded at him obligingly and started carried the plates to the table where Jake had already put the food.
We all loaded up our plates and started to dig in, Jacob ate like he was starving; but before I ate my first bite I silently prayed that Jake would be here to eat breakfast with me.
After dinner Charlie mumbled that he was going to watch baseball in his room so that we could have the living room. Jacob smiled at him and told him goodnight and then Charlie kissed me on the forehead and disappeared upstairs.
Jake and I sat on the couch, and I couldn't help but scoot up close next to him, as close as I could get, and wrap my arms around one of his larger ones.
He smiled at me, "I think I'm going to go find a vampire to fight every night if it means you are going to act like this."
It just showed how bothered I was that I didn't say anything.
"It will be ok Bella, I'd move a fucking mountain to come back here and get my kiss," he smiled at me but again I failed at giving him one back. Instead I just clutched his arm closer to me.
I'm was going to die, that's all there is to it. He is going to go out there and fight, and he's going to get hurt, and when he doesn't come back it will be just like losing Edward all over again, except that this time the man wouldn't be leaving by choice, and I was wasn't healed yet from the last one…I was already hurt, giving me more pain would break me. My anxiety was so high that I had to clamp my eyes shut for a minute or so just to hold back the tears threatening to escape.
"Bella, if you can't smile for me then I will be forced to make you," he sighed, "and you told me you hated tickling, so I suggest you get your act together."
I sighed and gave him my best effort for a smile, and I guess he deemed that it was also the best he could get, because he left me alone after that. For two hours the movie ran on and even though I had seen It twice before, I had no idea what was going on during any part of it. My mind never stopped working and my arms never loosened their grip on him.
He got up to put another one of our favorites in, but paused when I wouldn't let go of his arm.
"Bella, I'm just going to put in another movie…" he whispered.
I shook my head, "Can't we watch TV?"
He laughed, "Sweetie we have almost five more hours of waiting, cable just isn't going to cover it. Now I'm going to get up and go to the bathroom, and you're going to pick us out a movie; and then we will sit down, just like we are now, and cuddle some more. Ok?"
I took a deep breath and released his arm, trying to beat down the wave of panic that swept over me. Jake walked into the bathroom and I dug though the stack of movies and pulled out one that I didn't exactly recognize nor care about. I pushed it in the DVD player and sat down to wait for him to come back.
He flopped down next to me and I immediately latched onto his arm like a child clutching its mother.
He smiled and pressed play on the remote only to glare at me as the movie started. It took me a minute to realize that he was even looking at me.
"What?" I mumbled, trying my best not to look pathetic.
"Pride and Prejudice? Really Bella?" he glowered at me.
I couldn't help but smile, "I'm sorry, I didn't actually READ the title…" I hadn't even known we owned it… mom must have bought it for herself and it had accidentally been packed in my stuff.
He rolled his eyes but settled in to suffer through it.
My arms and head ached and my mind was starting to slow down, exhausted from being so overworked with my emotions in such a short time. I blinked my now heavy lids and decided I would only shut them for a second, before I went back to figuring out a way to keep Jake from dying tonight.
"Wake up Bells," Jake whispered; his lips on my forehead, "it's time."
I blinked for a moment and then it all hit me and I sat up, "Jacob! Why the hell didn't you wake me up! I needed to spend time with you! You can't leave! I'm not ready yet!"
He smoothed my hair back, "You needed the sleep more than you needed to watch lame movies with me and I need you healthy. So that when I DO get back, that kiss you owe me will be the best ever." He smiled and stood up to stretch.
Thunder rumbled outside and I shivered, "Jake…please…don't…"
He ignored me and spoke in almost a whisper, "It's started to rain, how much ass does that suck? She will be harder to keep track of because of that."
Tears were already running down my cheeks, "Jake! No!" I moved towards him and he wrapped me in one of his famous bear hugs.
"Shhh Bella, keep your voice low, let's pretend Charlie can hear us," he murmured against my hair.
I sobbed but whispered my next words, "Please Jake…I have a bad feeling…please…"
He smiled, "Do you know how long I have wanted to hear you beg me like that? Like you need me?"
I didn't even blush. "Stay with me Jacob. Stay and I'll give you more than a damn kiss, I'll give you more than I've ever given Edward! I'll give you whatever you want, please," I surprised even myself; I had just offered my Jacob…my virginity.
That got his attention. He turned on me, eyes digging into mine and his hands clutching my arms so tight it hurt, "Don't let your fear control you and make you say something you are going to regret."
"I'm not!" I cried softly, "I'm not! Come upstairs! Please!"
Jacob glared at me, "Do you mean to tell me that you would take me up stairs and let me fuck you just so that you can keep me from fighting tonight?"
I flinched at his words and his rough voice but nodded quickly, "Yes, anything you want. Jake, please!" I tugged on his arm and tried to get him to move towards my bedroom, I would do anything if it meant he would be alive tomorrow. I was in a state of pull blown panic.
"I don't know whether to be happy that you care so much about me or completely pissed that you think I'm so incapable of doing what I was born to do…" He whispered heatedly.
I cried harder, "I know you can fight Jake! I just don't trust her!" he shushed me again and I sobbed quietly.
A soft howl reached our ears and I clutched tighter to him.
"It's show time Bells, let's go outside and play for the cameras," he kissed my forehead and gently unwrapped my clenched arms from around him. He smiled and walked outside, and I was helpless to do anything but follow.
We walked through the yard and into the trees not far away. The pack was all there, all in their wolf forms but Sam.
"Jacob," his voice was clear and calm, and soft, as if he knew she was listening and he didn't have to worry a bit about her not being close enough to hear him. "Quil scented the leech bitch near his home, we think she is still skulking around there. The pack is going to hunt her tonight, we need you."
Jacob growled, "I won't leave Bella just so she can circle back and hurt her."
"The leech won't circle back, she will have to feed soon, we need to catch her when she's weak," Sam said.
"I WILL not leave Bella alone," Jake growled and pushed me behind him.
"I will stay," Paul shifted from his wolf form and stood in front of us, I could see the blood dripping down his leg from where I stood, "I wouldn't be much use in a fight against the leech anyway."
I didn't have to fake a sharp intake of breath as he moved into the moonlight and I saw a gouge the size of my palm on his upper right thigh. "Paul…that's horrible…what…what happened…"
He laughed and winced. I didn't think it was faked either, "Embry got carried away when we were…playing… shoved me into a tree."
Jared laughed, "Luckily a branch caught him."
"Luckily, he wasn't hurt worse, you two are idiots," Sam scowled. He REALLY wasn't faking. "Back to the leech; Paul, you go inside with Bella, let her clean that up, and Jacob, come with us." He shifted, and any chance of further argument was lost. Sadly enough I was probably the only one that wanted to argue.
Jacob turned to me, "I'll be back. I promise… I'll end it tonight." He tossed Paul a pair of shorts I hadn't seen him carrying.
It would end. One way or another. "Remember why you are coming back," I whispered and turned to Paul. "Come on, Charlie's asleep by now; let's get that…hole, cleaned up."
Paul smiled at me, and started walking towards the house, only slightly favoring one side.
Jake smiled at me, like he was just going down to the gas station to get us a couple of snacks, "I'll be right back."
I nodded and turned. God damn my stupid eyes…they just wouldn't stop leaking…
Paul squeezed my shoulder, "He'll be back. You should know better than anyone that no leech is going to scare off Jacob."
I winced at his words, and he smiled. This wasn't the first time I found myself thinking that Paul didn't like me. I waved my hand at the chair next to him instead of replying. He rolled his eyes but sat down and let me start cleaning away the blood.
He cocked his head as if he was listening to something, and then mumbled, "So tell me how Charlie is doing."
I blinked at him, we both knew that he didn't care about Charlie.
"It's too quiet Bella. Tell me anything." His voice was low, and he was talking to me, but he never once looked at me.
I nodded and started to tell him about how Charlie was doing, and then how my mother and her man were doing, and ended up venting about her always getting to act like a child when I had to act like an adult. I stopped talking after I finished wrapping his leg and realized I had said a lot more than I'd intended to.
He nodded and stood up, "Let's watch some TV."
I walked over to turn on the TV and turned around to find his back to me while he slipped off his shorts, the only article of clothing he was wearing, in my kitchen floor. I whirled around, but it was too late, the image of his ass was seared into my brain. "Paul!"
A soft thump on the couch told me he had sat down, so I felt safe enough to turn around. Again I was surprised, but at least this time he wasn't naked. "Paul, what are you-"
He shook his furred head as if to shush me, and then dug at the couch with one of his paws…which I guess could be sort of interpreted as patting the seat. I sat and looked up at the huge animal perched on my couch. Again his head was cocked, listening to more than I could ever hear.
I think an hour passed before I had to break the silence, but it felt more like 8.
"Is he ok Paul?" I whispered.
Paul turned his huge head towards me, looking at me with such human eyes, studying me. Slowly he nodded and I heaved a sigh of relief; only to suck it back in as I heard a window shatter upstairs.
Paul was instantly jumping up the stairs, five at a time, and then he was gone from my sight. I stood up and listened for any noise of a brawl.
"Dearest Bella," her voice whispered from behind me as her cold hand clamped over my mouth like a steel band. "I've missed you so…"