Hi guys! After the two parter and mostly after Hunt I felt like they didn't show that much of Kate's reaction to things, mostly to the scene I chose to write about. I would like to put emphasis on the fact that I ADORED these episodes I don't think the episode would have been better with something like this in it, I think it's perfect the way it is! So this tag is mostly just a tiny idea that floated around my head after watching. I know it's awfully late but I just didn't have the time to finish this sooner. The parts in italics are scenes from the actual episode and the rest can be blamed on my imagination! I hope you will like it! :)
Disclaimer: Oh, how I wish I had the slightest part in creating this amazing show… But no such luck!
Castle watched as his phone flew up in the clear, forest air and in the next second it was blown to pieces. He jumped at the harsh sound of the rifle right beside his ear and he turned to the man at his side with an exasperated yell.
"What are you doing? That was a $200 phone!" he grimaced. How will he keep in touch with Beckett now? And more importantly, what if the kidnappers wanted to contact him?
"And that's how they track you..." said the man seriously, without even the hint of regret in his voice.
Kate clutched her cell phone to her ear desperately, her body tense as she perched on the edge of the desk.
"Castle? Castle!" she called, hoping with all her heart that her partner would answer her, say something to reassure her that he was okay. That he was all right. But the rational side of her mind knew what she heard. She knew that his phone had been shot to pieces even before the beeping sounded, indicating that the line was broken.
Her heart was hammering in her chest as she pulled the phone away from her ear, eyes staring into the nothing in front of her as the sound echoed in her mind.
She tried to calm herself, saying over and over again that he was alright. He had to be! He would call her back any minute and tell her what happened...
She hopped off the desk, feeling the eyes of the IT guy on herself. Exiting the room she ran her fingers through her hair, taking in deep breaths and exhaling them slowly.
Her mind was giving her images of Castle laying on the ground, covered in blood God knows where and she felt her hands tremble. She couldn't lose him, not when things were so perfect between them. Not now when she was finally starting to allow herself to love him and be loved in return.
She went into the break room for a coffee but she couldn't pour the hot beverage into a cup because her hands were shaking. She willed them to stay steady but it didn't help, she only ended up spilling a few drops of the coffee on her jeans.
"Crap..." she muttered and put her mug down.
She pulled out her phone and tried to call Castle back. She knew it was hopeless, she knew he wouldn't answer but she just couldn't help herself. Still, her throat became dry and her heart clenched painfully when she heard the mechanic voice telling her that his phone was unavailable at the moment.
In these moments she hated that she was a cop. That she had to think rationally, that she had to act reasonably and be responsible. She wished she could act like a girlfriend, somebody who was scared to death for their loved one's well being. Which she was. She didn't know if she could bear to lose him. She wasn't sure that she wouldn't go mad if she lost Castle. Kate was pretty sure she wouldn't be able to take any more loss...
She went back to the bullpen and looked around for Ryan and Esposito. They were bent over their desks typing away crazily on their computers. They wanted to find Alexis as soon as possible too, Kate knew that but she couldn't ignore the panic in her heart. Rick was in Paris and she wasn't there. He might be in danger but she wasn't there to protect him... She knew she wouldn't be able to do much even if she was there, but he was there with her every time her mother's murder came up again. He was there every time she was in a life and death situation ever since she knew him. And even if only to hold his hand and try to reassure him, Kate wanted to be there with him.
The sound of the gunshot still echoed in her head as she walked towards her detectives. God knows what trouble he has gotten himself in without even thinking about consequences. And he didn't know how to protect himself. He may liked to think that he was becoming more and more like a cop and it might be true about solving mysteries, but not about training and about weapons and combat. He didn't get a training yet he was playing spy, playing the hero.
He was just a writer. A cheeky, annoying, nosy, childish, arrogant, adorable, lovable writer. Her writer...
But Kate knew that he wouldn't step back, she knew he would go and do something stupid and reckless. Because his daughter was taken and she was the most important person in his world. Kate knew that if anything happened to Alexis he would do anything in the world to save her. Anything. She could see that when they questioned the suspect with the gunshot wound. He was determined and he had a wildness in his eyes that she had never seen before. Not that she didn't understand it completely...
But now he had ran off to Paris and here she was, stuck in New York when all she wanted to do was go there and search the whole city for him if it was neccessary.
"Yo, Beckett! What's new? How's Castle?" asked Esposito, bringing her out of her thoughts as she stopped next to his desk.
"Not good... I think he's in trouble." she told him and saw that Ryan was listening as well. "Listen guys, I..." she thought it over one last time, but her decision didn't change. She couldn't stay here, she knew she wouldn't even be able to help the guys now. She was way too close to this too, they all were. But now she had this constant fear in her chest and she couldn't focus on anything other than Castle. "I have to go there. Find him. Just... Be there for him if I can't do anything more. I just can't stay here... Will you..uh, cover for me? Make something up for Gates?" she asked and looked the guys in the eye. Both of them were looking at her with understanding and Kate felt relief and gratitude overcome her at their loyalty.
"Sure thing!" Esposito said without hesitation and his partner nodded in agreement.
"Though I don't think she will ask..." Ryan added and Beckett agreed. The captain seemed just as intent on getting Alexis back as them, which surprised her but also made her like Gates just a bit more.
"Thanks guys!" she said and turned to leave when Esposito grabbed her arm.
"Hey Beckett! Be careful!" he asked and she smiled at him.
"I will!" she promised then rushed to her desk to get her jacket and in two minutes she was out of the precinct.
She wanted the fastest way possible, she called the airport and as soon as she got home she switched on her computer to check out the website as well. The next flight to Paris was already full and the one after that would only take off six hours later. Kate sighed helplessly then decided that it would have to do. It wasn't like she had a private jet to go with…
She pulled out a duffle bag and without looking at what she was packing she threw a couple of clothes in it. Just the most important stuff. Underwear, a warm sweater, her backup gun, toiletries. She also put a change of top into the bag, just in case. A book for the flight and her passport came on top of it all and she was finished.
Kate looked at the clock and saw that she still had five hours and ten minutes till the plane took off. Still more than three hours till she even had to get to the airport.
After a moment of thinking she pulled out her phone and tried to call Castle again. Much to her surprise it rang out, but even though she waited forever he didn't answer. Her chest was heavy and her mouth dry. How was it possible that his phone survived the shot? Maybe it wasn't aimed at the phone? Maybe the shot hit him?
She didn't want to consider that as an option, but why the Hell didn't he call her back? He knew she would be crazy worried…
Kate gritted her teeth together and called the precinct instead, making sure that her disappearance didn't cause any trouble. Esposito assured her that they kept everything under control and that Gates didn't even ask about her whereabouts when she returned from a meeting. He told her to stay calm because that was the only way she could find and help Castle and Kate knew he was right. If only she could even out her erratic heartbeat!
When she ended the call she decided a shower was much needed and she made her way to the bathroom. Hot water did in fact do wonders to her body but not her mind. She was still mulling over the phone call with Castle and what he might be doing at the moment.
Kate quickly dressed and after admitting to herself that she wouldn't be able to sit around and wait anymore she grabbed the duffel bag and exited her apartment. She hailed a cab and told the driver to get to the airport as soon as possible. She kept fidgeting with the zipper on the bag and with the sleeve of her shirt as the taxi crossed BrooklynBridge and as soon as they arrived at JFK she threw some money to the driver and was out of the car.
She raced through the crowd, her bag constantly hitting other people's luggage and got to the mile long queue at the counter where she needed to buy a ticket. With a scowl she stood in the line, blaming it on bad karma.
Her stomach was clenched into a tight knot and her heart was thumping in her throat. She gripped the handle of the bag so hard that her knuckles got white but the queue moved excruciatingly slowly. She did her best to keep her mind off Castle and the worst scenarios she could come up with but it wasn't really effective.
By the time she only had two people before her, her nerves were a mess. She was on the verge of bursting out in tears and she had checked her cell phone about thousand times to see if the guys left her any message.
She was acting like the nervous girlfriend and she hated that as well. She hated the insecurity and the all encompassing worry that settled deep in her gut.
The vibrating of her phone in her pocket tore her out of her thoughts and she fished it out while taking a step closer to the counter. She would be the next one, she noted relievedly.
Kate looked at the screen and raised her eyebrows when she saw the unknown number. She examined the numbers and almost dropped her phone when she realized that it wasn't a call from the U.S. Her finger was trembling slightly as she answered it, her head spinning from panic. What if something happened to him? What if it was bad news? She chased there thoughts out of her mind and cleared her throat.
"Beckett!" her voice sounded strong, the familiar professional way she picked it up giving her tone some confidence.
"Kate?" she heard a breathy voice and she grasped her cell tighter, recognising it instantly.
"Rick! What happened? God, are you okay?" she asked, praying that he would reassure her. Begging that it wasn't a ransom call, or a goodbye call... She wouldn't be able to take that. She wouldn't be able to bear his loss! She couldn't lose him...
"Yes! Everything is fine, I have Alexis and we are at the U.S. Embassy. We're safe and we are going home today!" he told her and Kate felt tears well up in her eyes.
"That's good… I'm…uh, I'm glad you're okay…" she rasped out, her voice trembling.
"Kate, you okay?" she heard his concerned question and let out a weak chuckle.
"Yeah, sure…" she murmured, wiping away an escaped tear with her thumb. She didn't even know how much this had effected her until she heard his voice. The stress and worrying took its toll on her and now she felt fragile and exhausted. All the pent up and repressed fear got free at hearing him, healthy and alive and mixed up with her endless relief.
"Excuse me, Miss…. Hello! Miss!" a polite voice interrupted her thoughts and she looked up to see that she was next in line. The lady behind the ticket counter was blinking at her questioningly, waiting for her to say where she wanted to go.
"I'm sorry…" she told her and stood to the side, turning and walking away, feeling the confused stare of the woman on her back. She was still clutching her phone and her legs were shaky as she walked. "When should I expect you to arrive?" she asked from Castle, willing her voice to be confident and not to show the emotional wave she was having. He didn't need to know how she got all panicky. How she almost flew to Paris without even having permission from her boss just to look for him and make sure he was fine. Kate wasn't ready for him to know that she was so deeply in love with him that she couldn't imagine living without him… No, not yet. But the time would come soon!
"About 8-9 hours. Please Kate go home and have some rest. Tell the boys to do so as well! I'll call you when our plane lands at JFK!" he said and she couldn't help but roll her eyes a bit. How could he say that like it was so easy? She knew she wouldn't be able to relax until she had him in her arms, until she saw with her own eyes that he wasn't harmed!
"Right! Okay, have a safe flight! Tell Alexis that I say hi and that I'm happy that she's fine!" she told him, her lungs feeling dry as three little words, ignored and repressed for so long, wanted to be spoken out loud.
"I will!" he promised "See you in a couple hours. Bye Kate!" he said and she could hear that there was more he wanted to say and her heart swelled at that. He knew she wasn't ready to hear it and say it back. He knew her so much. And she loved him so much for it. She let out a small smile at that thought. She had come such a long way. There she was, able to think about it, admitting it to herself in her mind. And one day, before long, she would surprise him and say them herself.
"Bye Castle!" she said and ended the call, exiting the airport and hailing a cab to ride to his loft.
The door to the loft flew open and Kate and Martha looked at it in the same second. Martha jumped up from her seat on the couch with a happy shriek.
"Ohh, you're back! You're back! Ohh…" she ran to Alexis and embraced her.
Meanwhile Kate put her mug down and got up from the armrest of the couch as well, smiling widely at Alexis then only having eyes for the writer who entered a step after the young redhead, his eyes already searching for hers.
"Oh, it's great to be home…" Alexis told her grandmother but Kate barely heard it as she rushed to Castle and she wound her arms tightly around his middle, her heart thumping painfully in her chest.
"I'm so glad you're okay!" she whispered their trademark sentence into his ear, almost smirking at how many times they had exchanged that one little sentiment, using it to express all that they couldn't say just yet. He sighed into her shoulder and she reluctantly pulled back an inch to look into his eyes, which were serious and a bit guilty. "Please, don't do anything like that again without me!" she pleaded with him, allowing all her worry and dread for their well being to show for a moment, just to show him what she felt, how serious she was. Her eyes traveled his face to make sure that he was okay then met his eyes again, feeling so grateful that he was there.
"I won't!" he promised with a warm, handsome smile and she let a smile spread on her face as well while she reached to cup his face and pull him to her for a short, loving kiss.
"It's okay, Gram! I'm okay!" they heard Alexis's voice reassuring Martha when they broke apart.
"Oh.." Martha sighed and Kate looked at the pair next to them.
"Honey, hi!" she said with a huge smile as she moved towards Alexis, pulling the girl to herself and squeezing her as she felt Alexis's hand come up around her.
"Come here, you are brilliant!" Martha told Castle while hugging her son and Kate's felt warmness spread in her whole body at the familiarity of it all. She couldn't even believe that she was in fact part of this wonderful family. That they all, even Alexis, forgave every wrong move she had, every mistake she made, every time Castle was put to harm's way because he worked with her and mostly every time she hurt Castle and accepted her without hesitation. They welcomed her like she was always a family member and Kate was beyond thankful for that!
"Just bril… Everybody must be starving! Come on! I made breakfast!" Martha announced and pulled her son towards the kitchen. Kate took Alexis's arm affectionately and they followed Martha and Castle.
Kate felt relief and love overflow her because they were fine. She pushed aside all the questions she wanted to ask from Castle, all the worries that this might not be over yet, all the tears that escaped to fall and cherished this moment. They were all right and they were home and it was all that mattered…
So, this was it! I would love to hear what you thought about it, so reviews and all kinds of feedback would be highly appreciated! :)
Thank you for reading! I hope you liked it!