A/N: Thought that I should post this today as it is April Fools after all (well it still is here at least). This is for destielisreal who asked for the prank war between the boys. So here it is! I had to cut a bunk of pranks out because it was getting way too long. Not my best work but oh well. Enjoy!
The pranks had started off simple, just little things that Gabriel got a kick out of. That was how he found himself before Dean and Castiel's apartment.
Gabriel was glad that Castiel had given him a spare key to their apartment, grinning as the door opened silently. He moved swiftly to their bathroom, his manner professional after years of pulling prank after prank. He knew that it was a classic prank but it still was hilarious. He had a package of Saran Wrap in his hand and one thing on his mind.
Dean and Castiel got home early that morning; Castiel going right to bed while Dean went to go get a shower. Castiel was nearly asleep when he heard Dean yell from the bathroom. "CAS! Get your ass in here!"
Castiel groaned as he rolled out of the bed and walked to the bathroom, knowing that Dean would have kept on yelling until he did. Dean was standing in the middle of the room, towel wrapped around his waist and his arms crossed. "Ha ha, very funny Castiel."
Dean only ever used Castiel's full name if he was pissed at him or horny and Castiel was sure that it wasn't the latter, "What is it Dean?"
Dean pointed at the toilet, face stony, "Saran Wrapping the toilet? Very elementary school Castiel."
Castiel ran a hand over his face, far to tired to be arguing with Dean, "I did not do anything to the toilet."
"Then who-" The realization dropped the look from Dean's face and making it into surprise then anger, "Gabriel. That son of a bitch."
Castiel turned from the room, heading towards the bed once again, "I am going back to bed now."
Dean ignored him, a smile creeping across his face as he spoke to himself, "Oh it is so on."
Sam was getting ready for his interview later that day, turning on the shower to let it heat up before climbing in. He hummed, as he got ready, washing the brand name shampoo out of his hair. Sam leaned out of the shower, grabbing a towel to dry himself off with. Everything was fine until the towel started to stick to him; the more he tried to wipe the water off of him, the worse that it got. Eventually Sam had to start picking off the little pieces of cloth that got left behind.
He walked out of the bathroom, chest bare so he could pick the fabric off, and headed to the kitchen where Gabriel was currently cooking breakfast. "Gabe, I think there's something wrong with our shower."
Gabriel looked up, tilting his head at the taller man picking miniscule pieces of towel off of him, "What are you doing?"
Sam looked up shrugging, "I think the water is sticky or something, my towel stuck to me and now it won't let go."
Gabriel rolled his eyes and walked to the bathroom, heading straight for the shower. Screwing off the head he hit it against the wall. The remainder of a lemon flavor hard candy fell out. Sam didn't clue in right away so Gabriel explained; "The candy melts in the hot water and makes you sticky when you try to dry off."
Sam shot Gabriel a look, making the other man to hold up his hands, "Hey! I didn't do it!"
"Then who did?" Sam demanded.
"I don't know!" Gabriel replied, "Probably Dean," he muttered sheepishly.
"And why would Dean want to prank you?" Sam asked slowly.
"I might have Saran Wrapped his toilet…"
Sam shook his head, chuckling at his husband, "Well, we're just going to have to get him back then aren't we?"
That was when Gabriel swore that Sam was his soul mate.
While Dean and Castiel were at work Gabriel and Sam snuck into their house, a tube of superglue in hand and a handful of wires connected to a sound box. They were very proud of this little prank.
Dean got home before Castiel, flopping down on the couch for a nap before Castiel got back from a double shift at the hospital. He must have dozed off for what seemed like a few seconds later Castiel came through the door, flopping down on top of Dean. Dean let out a huff of air as Castiel hit him hard. Looking down at the other man Dean chuckled, "Long day?"
The grunt that came from Castiel was answer enough. Dean tapped Castiel on the shoulder, signaling that he wanted to get up. Castiel rolled on his side, letting Dean climb out from under him before flopping face down into the couch again. Dean headed to the kitchen to grab a few beers, opening the fridge to find them.
When the woman's scream echoed through the kitchen Dean stumbled backwards, falling over the table behind him and hitting the floor in a heap, "Shit!" Dean scrambled to shut the fridge, cutting off the ear-piercing scream that emitted from the appliance. Looking at the door for a moment Dean slowly opened it, the scream starting the moment the seal broke. He shut it quickly again, opening it, then shutting it, making a song out of the scream. Laughing at the moment he pulled the door open, ignoring the scream as he grabbed two bottles out of the fridge.
Dean walked to the living room and to the couch. Castiel had flipped onto his back and Dean patted him legs. Castiel lifted them so Dean could sit, placing them over his lap once he was down. Dean passed him one of the beers, Castiel looking at him groggily, "What was happening in the kitchen?"
Dean chuckled, "Gabriel rigged the fridge to scream every time it opened. Amateur." Dean twisted at the cap of his beer, startled when it didn't open. Getting a firmer grip on it he tried again, his frustration growing when the cap just wouldn't come off.
Castiel watched as Dean struggled with the beer, "Maybe it's not a screw top?"
Dean glared at him, "It's a screw top Cas, the assholes glued the caps to the bottle." Castiel let out a silent 'oh' as Dean got up and went back to the kitchen with the two bottles. There was the sound of shattering glass then the pouring of liquid. Dean came back with two glasses of beer.
Castiel sat up, back against the armrest, legs tucked under him. He took one of the beers against Dean's, toasting to Dean's, "Here's to the beginning to the ultimate prank war."
It had been Castiel's idea and Dean was overly proud. It was his first prank war after all, and the idea wasn't as lame as he thought it could have been.
It was midnight when the first alarm clock went off; the ringing bells waking Sam instantly. Rolling over he reached for the bedside table, hitting the snooze button on the clock. The ringing didn't stop. Sam was fully awake by now, realizing that the ringing wasn't coming from the bedside, but from the corner of the room. He grudgingly got out of bed, heading for the source of the noise. He found a classic alarm clock sitting there; ringing like it's life depended on it. Sam turned it off before going back to bed, Gabriel rolling over as he climbed back in, "What's going on?"
Sam put a kiss on his forehead, the younger man curling into him, "Just an alarm clock going off. Nothing to worry about."
Gabriel hummed, already drifting back to sleep. It was one twenty five when the next alarm went off. Sam eyes snapped open, the gears grinding to life in his head. Grumbling he got up, hunting down the bane of his existence. This one was on the couch, Sam almost breaking the clock as he turned it off. The next one went off at two, hiding under the sink. The fourth went off at two thirty, this time it was on top of the kitchen cabinets. The fifth was ringing by three forty five; Sam tempted to smash the clock he found taped to the back of the front door out the window. The final clock went off at five twenty, ten minutes before Sam had to get up for work. Fishing it out from under their bed Sam took the clock, ringing in his hand, and opened the window. Cocking his arm back he threw the item as far as he could, listening as the ringing slowly softened then stopped, the sound of glass and metal breaking putting a smile on his face.
Sam climbed into bed, turned off his alarm clock, and buried his head into the pillow. He would call in sick later.
Gabriel was surprised that it was so easy to steal Dean and Castiel's clothes. Apparently neither of them knew what they owned well enough to realize that half of their closet was missing. They didn't even notice when they switched the clothes, the other half of their closet now missing.
Castiel never claimed to be a morning person, in fact Dean got up after Castiel had left for work just to avoid those few minutes of Hell that emerged from the other side of the bed.
Castiel grabbed a pair of scrubs and headed to the bathroom, his daily shower waking him up better than a cup of coffee. His mood was always dark before he got to the hospital, he hated mornings. His mood was worsened when he tried to put on his pants and saw that no matter how hard he tried he couldn't get his feet through the bottoms of the pants. It was made worse when he tried to pull the shirt over his head and couldn't get it on, his arms not even willing to go through the fabric. Tossing the clothes onto the ground he stormed back into their room, going through every piece of clothing that he owned, tossing each scrap over his shoulder before heading to the next.
This caught Dean's attention, half asleep when he glanced over at Castiel, "What are you doing?"
Castiel spun around, his face murderous, "All of my clothes are sewn together."
Gabriel's cell phone grabbed his attention, pausing the movie before answering, "Jo's sausage shack, what flavor and size would you like today?"
"Give Cas his clothes back." Dean was pissed which made Gabriel smile even more.
"Now what ever would make me want to do that?" Gabriel asked sweetly, smiling at Sam who was sitting next to him.
"Because he is thirty seconds from killing a homeless man for his pants and that blood is on your hands."
Gabriel sighed dramatically, "Fine. I'll bring Castiel his clothes."
The tension eased out of Dean's voice, "Thanks Gabriel."
"I didn't say when Dean-o. Cheers!" Gabriel hung up before Dean could respond.
When Gabriel unlocked his office door a sea of half-filled paper cups met him. Groaning Gabriel placed his briefcase on the ground and went to grab one of the cups. What Gabriel didn't expect was the cups around it coming up with it, spilling some of the water onto the carpet. Gabriel put it back quickly, not wanting to be working in a swimming pool for the rest of the day.
It took him half the day to rip each cup apart and empty them, tossing away each cup and coming up with his revenge.
Castiel was let off his shift early, Wendy coming in to take over for him saying that she needed the hours to make up for her the extra vacation time she used for her uncles funeral. Castiel reached their apartment, fiddling for his keys as he pictured the bath that he was going to take before Dean came home, toying with the idea of even taking one with Dean. Slipping the key into the lock Castiel turned it, and nothing happened. Pulling the key out Castiel tried another, finding that it didn't work either. Castiel went through his entire key ring before realizing that nothing worked. He just shrugged it off, thinking that he might have lost the key somewhere. He would just have to tell Dean and they could change their locks later in the day. Castiel sat down next to the door, getting comfortable for the thirty minutes that he would have to wait until Dean came home.
The sight of Castiel sitting on the ground met Dean, phone in his hand and the sounds of explosions coming from it. Castiel looked up at Dean, slipping the phone into his pocket as he stood up, "I seem to have lost my key."
Dean rolled his eyes, pulling out his keys as he said; "We'll change the locks tomorrow then."
Dean tried to turn the key, eyebrows coming together when it didn't work. Pulling the key out Dean tried another and it didn't work either. Dean was positive that he was using his house keys; he had labeled them for a reason. Banging his fits against the door he growled, "They changed the locks! I knew it was a bad idea to give Gabriel a key!"
Castiel put a hand on Dean's shoulder, calming the other man down a tad, "It is okay Dean. You forget, we have a key to their apartment also."
Dean turned to Castiel and grinned, "I love you."
Castiel smiled back, "I know."
Sam was the one to get home first from the University. Sam was able to get a job as a Teachers Aid in three separate classes, Greek Mythology, Latin, and Creative Writing. Stomach growling Sam headed right for the kitchen to make dinner. Sam went through the kitchen, trying to find the food that he knew was there. Every cupboard was bare and the only food that they had was in the fridge. And it was plastic.
That was how Gabriel walked in to the smell of pizza and Sam playing with plastic fruit. Neither of them minded the prank, but it still gave them a reason to retaliate.
It was the weekend and that meant that Dean and Castiel had two days off. It was meant to be relaxing and refreshing, which was the exact opposite of what happened.
Dean came home and was ready to take a nap, groaning from the days of hard labor. When he opened the bedroom door hundreds of crumpled up newspapers flooded out of the room. Scowling Dean waded through the paper, slowly making his way to the bed. Shoving the paper off the mattress to make a space for his body, Dean flopped down, tired enough not to care about the paper slowly covering him.
That was how Castiel found him an hour later. The bedroom waist deep in newspaper and Dean buried on the bed.
Gabriel found the first stuffed animal while searching for a box of cereal. It was sitting behind the box, the bull staring at him with cold eyes. Thinking nothing of it he shut the cupboard and walked away. It was when there was a duck in the bowls and a goldfish in the fridge that Gabriel realized that this was another attempt at a prank.
Though out the rest of the day there were stuffed animals everywhere. They were in the shower. They were in the sink. There were monkeys on the couch and dogs in the drawers. Cats hung from the ceiling and Turkeys were in the oven. There was a snake in Gabriel's briefcase and a stuffed animal was placed front row center of each class that Sam helped in. Even the students came by and handed him a stuffed animal, every single one of them. They lined the path that each of them took to work and people kept handing them to Gabriel. The homeless man gave his up rather reluctantly though, saying that him and Jolene had a 'special connection'. Gabriel threw that one out right away. By the end of the day Gabriel and Sam had both collected over five hundred stuffed animals.
Gabriel was quite impressed; the only thing he wanted to know was where they got all those animals.
It was the smell that hit Dean first.
Once you have smelt rotten cheese you never forget it. The problem was, Dean couldn't find it. It wasn't coming from the bathroom, defiantly wasn't coming from the kitchen, and Dean didn't know where else to look. He and Castiel took apart the house, grabbing cushions off the couch; pulling furniture from the walls and crawling on the floor to see under anything they couldn't move.
But the Cheese was nowhere to be found.
It was two days before Castiel got the idea to look in the vents.
Dean knew that this was a prank that he couldn't miss. This was something that you had to experience for yourself.
Hiding at the end of the hallway Dean waited for Gabriel or Sam, either of them would be hilarious. Castiel stood behind him, not understanding the humor behind the prank, but trusting that Dean knew what he was doing.
It was Sam who came in first, turning his head around to talk to Gabriel as they entered. Dean almost gave them away but was able to hold his snicker in. Just in time too as Sam took a step forward, head turning around, and walked straight into the Saran Wrap covering the top half of the door way. It was like watching a dog run into a glass door, their expression of surprise slowly fading to confusion absolutely priceless. Sam was so shocked by the plastic that he didn't have time to warn Gabriel, the shorter man running into the trap as well.
Dean nearly split a gut laughing, Castiel joining him rolling on the floor. Once they had enough breath to speak Dean wheezed out, "You should have seen your faces,' causing him and Castiel to burst out in another fit of laughter.
Both of them were lucky to leave the house alive.
It wasn't that the prank wasn't clever, it was. It was the fact that his T.V. remotes were encased in Cherry Jell-O that got Gabriel. He had always watched The Big Bang Theory once he got home for work and now he had the job of cleaning gelatinous mass from between the buttons.
The only plus side was the fact that Gabriel got to eat Jell-O as he watched the re-run.
Castiel had to get up everyday at ten p.m. to make it to the hospital on time for his shift. That was the misery of working the night shift. There was nothing out of the ordinary that night; everything was going Castiel's way. There was less traffic than usual and he hadn't had an awkward brush-in that usually happened during the shift change.
He was walking down the hallway the check in at the Nurses station when he ran into Rebecca, a nurse that he had the privilege to work with several times. She looked confused when she saw Castiel, pulling the clipboard to her body as she said, "Castiel? What are you doing here?"
Castiel tilted his head, "I am here for my shift."
Rebecca's confusion deepened, "But it doesn't start for another two hours." When Castiel's head tilted again she pointed to the clock on the wall, "See? It's only nine."
Dean was just getting up for work when his phone buzzed, indicating a message from Castiel. Gabriel and Sam set the clocks two hours ahead. Go back to sleep. Dean hit the pillows with a smile on his face.
Gabriel called it an April fools prank at the best. Dean was slacking.
Sam had just started brushing his teeth when he started gagging, yanking the brush out of his mouth as quick as he could. Grimacing he rinsed his brush, making sure that it was completely clean before attempting to brush his teeth again.
He came out of the bathroom a few minutes later, calling out to Gabriel, "Wash your tooth brush before you use it. Dean put salt on them."
Gabriel would have given anything to see Castiel's or Dean's face when they turned on the sink. It was a simple prank, just a piece of well-placed tape, but it was a laugh anyway.
It was Dean who had the misfortune to turn on the tap first, the water spraying him in the face and soaking him before he turned off the tap. He ripped the tape off and threw it in the trash, vowing his vengeance against Gabriel as he changed his shirt.
Dean knew that it wasn't creative, but it was enough to drive anyone crazy. He bought the cricket at the pet store, heading straight to Sam and Gabriel's apartment to let it go. He grinned as it hopped away, waiting for a moment until he hear the tell tale sound of a crickets chirp.
The sound kept Gabriel up all night, Sam able to sleep through the soft noise but Gabriel could not get the noise out of his head. The steady chirp echoing around his brain threatened to drive him crazy. He spent the next day hunting the insect down, killing it the moment he found it.
He placed the carcass of the bug in an envelope, putting it through Dean and Castiel's mail slot before heading to work the next day.
Sending the bug back just wasn't enough for Gabriel, so he came back after work, slipping silently into the house after Castiel left for work. Dean was in the bathroom, singing in the shower at the top of his lungs.
Gabriel walked towards the bathroom as silently as he could, pulling out a bag of pennies. Taking one out he jammed it between the door and the door jam, smiling and he pushed one after the other in. Looking over his work once more he quickly slipped away, proud of his handy work.
Dean ran his hands through his hair, giving himself a once over before going to leave the bathroom. Turning the door handle he pulled on the door. When it didn't move he put both hands on the doorknob, yanking as hard as he could. The door didn't move an inch.
Dean didn't get out of the bathroom until Castiel came home eight hours later. From then on there was always a screwdriver under the sink and Dean didn't go anywhere without his cell phone.
Sam and Gabriel had a ceiling fan in their living room and Dean knew that flour was a bitch to clean up. That was why he took a bag of flour and covered the blades of the fan in it. Making sure that there was nothing on the floor Dean left, scanning the room one more time, seeing there was no proof that he was even there.
Sam was the one to turn on the fan, the flour exploding from the fan and covering the room and Sam in a fine layer of white. He stood in the middle of the room, looking down at the flour that covered him from top to bottom. Gabriel's laugh echoed towards him, the man standing just out of the blast zone. Sam scooped up a handful of flour and threw it at Gabriel, hitting him square in the chest, the flour bursting onto his face. Gabriel looked at him stunned for a moment before taking his own handful, throwing it at Sam's face. He was able to duck in time to avoid a mouthful of flour, but the fight was on.
It took them two hours to clean up the flour and they had to get the couch dry cleaned, but it was worth it.
Castiel didn't notice the glances until halfway through his shift. They were fleeting, barely there, but everyone seemed to be sending them Castiel's way. Castiel ignored them, not really concerned about what his coworkers were thinking. He had his work to do and that was all that mattered.
That train of thought changed when Rebecca grabbed his arm and pulled him aside, looking around before saying, "Look Castiel, I am happy that you have a healthy relationship with your husband and all that, but could you keep your sex life a little bit more private?"
"I don't know what you are talking about," Castiel went to move past Rebecca, wanting to continue with his work.
Rebecca grabbed his arm and pulled him back, pressing a folder into his hand, "I picked it up the instant I found it, but a couple people had gotten to it first. It wasn't pretty."
Castiel was impatient now, huffing as he opened the envelope and pulling out the contents. His eyes went wide as he flipped through the pictures that he found. They were incredibly well photo-shopped, each one of 'him' and 'Dean' in various positions, costumes and kinks. Castiel took extra time examining one, tilting his head back and forth, even turning the picture upside down while muttering, "How does that even work?"
Rebecca watched as Castiel went through the pictures, a little uncomfortable at witnessing her co-workers sex life. She relaxed though as Castiel seemed just as surprised as she did, "So you didn't leave this lying around?"
Castiel was examining a picture of him completely bound and Dean lurking in the dark shadow of the black room, what seemed to be a Cat o' nine tails whip in his hand. "I can assure you, I have never seen these photos before in my life."
Rebecca let out the breath she didn't even know she was holding, "So why are they here?"
Castiel put the photos back in the envelope, placing it under his arm, "It seems that my old roommate has decided to take his prank to the next level."
"It was a prank?" Rebecca's jaw was on the floor, "That is so not funny."
Castiel nodded and went to walk past Rebecca again, "It matches his sense of humor, he probably found nothing wrong with it. If you would kindly inform those you see that the pictures were a joke I would be indebted to you."
Rebecca shrugged, "Sure. Don't want people walking around and thinking that you're some kind of sex fiend."
Castiel opened his mouth to correct Rebecca before she held up a finger, "Don't. I don't care if it's the wrong terminology. Damn it Cas! I'm a Doctor, not a linguist." With that she turned and left, leaving Castiel behind slightly confused, wondering where he had heard that before.
Gabriel was hanging over the back of the couch, his arms dangling and almost touching the floor, "Hurry up Sam! My tummy is making the rumblies that only hands can satisfy!"
Sam came into the living room with a bowl of popcorn and two glasses of water in his hands. He placed them on them both on the table before sitting on the couch, Gabriel pressing into his side and sighing contently. Sam looked down at his husband and laughed, "Really Gabe? Hands?"
Gabriel looked up at him, his face innocent, "What? They are nutritious and delicious."
Sam chuckled as he turned their movie on; tonight was 'Big Fish'. The screen darkened, remaining that way until a voice echoed in the room, "Don't turn around. Don't look back. You're here now, there is no escape."
Gabriel cocked an eyebrow, "Is that Dean?"
A sudden flash of light crossed the screen, making Gabriel jump. A series of picture flashed across the screen, maggots, eyeballs, crosses, pentagrams and rotting flesh. The music made Gabriel curl in closer to Sam, Sam holding on just to remind himself that he was there. The images kept flashing by, becoming creepier and more gruesome as they went on. Sam was grimacing by the time the voice came back, Gabriel white as a sheet. "In three days time you will be visited. In three days time you will be dead."
The screen went black again, Sam and Gabriel both staring at the screen dumbstruck. Gabriel eventually peeled himself off of Sam, going to the DVD player and taking the disk out. It was an average blank disk, nothing special about it. Gabriel put it back in its case and pulled out another movie. Looking at the disk this time Gabriel saw that it was the same blank disk. Dropping the movie he moved on to another, opening each case and dropping them to the ground. Each movie was the blank disk, every single one replaced.
Sam and Gabriel decided to just watch T.V. instead, nervously laughing off the whole ordeal.
Three days later Sam and Gabriel came home, opening the door getting a face full of plastic skeleton dressed up as a clown. Gabriel passed out immediately. Sam didn't sleep for a week.
Dean had just finished his shift at Bobby's and was searching for the Impala, which he swore he had parked in his regular spot. There was nothing there except for a baby blue Prius. Walking closer Dean could see that the interior was bright pink, the seats covered in a furry orange fabric. There was a note on the windshield, a simple 'Dean' written on the front. Picking it up Dean read, 'If you ever want to want to see your Impala again get into the car and follow to GPS's instructions. Do so, and your car will be returned to you.'
Crumpling the note in his hand Dean cursed, gritting his teeth as he climbed into the car. He winced as he turned the engine over, the soft purr a polar difference from the powerful rumble of his Impala. He was physically pained as he pulled out of the lot, knowing the mocking that he would get if anyone saw him in the car.
The GPS took him to an abandoned parking lot, his Impala sitting in the middle of the emptiness. Dean stopped the car, climbing out of the Prius and running to the Impala, gluing himself to the side of the car, stroking her exterior as he mumbled into her paint, "You scared me Baby. Don't ever leave me again. Gabriel's going to pay for touching you."
If there had been a hidden camera filming him the entire time Dean never found out.
The first phone call came while Gabriel was in the middle of a meeting. He had excused himself and walked out of the boardroom, hissing into the phone, "This had better be damn important."
"Oh it's very important." The voice on the other end of the line was one that Gabriel had never heard before. The man sounded like he had been sucking on helium and then smoked a pack of cigars, his voice way to high and gravely to be natural.
"Who the hell is this? How did you get my number?" Gabriel was pacing now, his mood accurately pictured as a teakettle about to boil over.
"Look, if you didn't want people calling you then why'd you put your number in the back that magazine?" The Dude was ticked off, clearly unimpressed with Gabriel.
"What magazine?" Gabriel had stopped pacing now, all of his attention on the guy on the other side of the phone.
"The one with the Asian chicks with massive tits. So if you don't mind, I'd like to get down to business." Gabriel hung up then, storming back into the meeting. He sat down heavy, Lucifer raising an eyebrow at him. Gabriel sent back a glare. Lucifer sighed, giving up on his moody brother.
The calls continued all day, Gabriel deciding that ignoring them would be better than trying to explain that he wasn't a pimp. Gabriel only made two calls that day, one to 'Busty Asian Beauties' to get the ad taken out and the other to Dean, just to curse him out a little. He had to get his anger out some how.
The clanking was driving Dean crazy and there was nothing he could do about it until he got to Bobby's shop. His grip tightened on the wheel every time the clank resounded through the car, fury building as he thought of ways to get Gabriel back. No one messed with Baby and got away with it.
He pulled into the garage, fuming as he got out of the car. Placing a jack under the rear tire, Dean cranked her up just enough so he could fit under. Wiggling under the car Dean went to the driveshaft, flipping open his pocket knife as he did so. Bobby walked into the shop to hear Dean grumbling under his breath. Standing before the car with his arms crossed Bobby asked, "What are you doing boy?"
Dean responded from underneath the Impala, "Gabriel put a Zip-tie around Baby's drive shaft. Every time it turned the tie hit the gas tank. Driving me crazy."
"What, the noise?" Bobby could hear the knife sawing through the plastic, Dean working with a vengeance.
"No. He touched Baby. No one touches Baby. This is the second time too. Son of a bitch is going to pay." Bobby rolled his eyes, walking out on Dean. Leaving him planning his revenge on the other man. He didn't care as long as it remained out of his shop. He kept his shotgun for a reason.
Sam had no idea how Dean and Castiel did it, but they did. All the desks and chairs from the entire University were on the roof. Not placed or stacked, but piled, interwoven and tangled in a heap. Not only were the desks there but Sam some how knew that the office chairs in the middle of the pile were from Gabriel's office. The desks were chained together, one lock keeping them all together with a note tapped on the front.
Sam was alone on the roof, having come early to prepare for class when he found the room bare. It had taken him half an hour to find the desks on the roof, the mound at least ten feet high and thirty across. He pulled the note off the lock, reading it as he tried to figure out how to explain to maintenance that he was in need of bolt cutters. The note was simple, Sam recognizing Dean's script right away, 'Don't mess with a dudes wheels.'
Sam crumpled up the note, taking one more look at the mountain before him. Maybe they had bribed the students to help.
It was Sam's idea, but Gabriel was the one to pull it off. Castiel noticed it first; it was hard not too considering the fact that there was a crowd surrounding the base of the hospital when he got there.
Castiel looked up, wondering what the big fuse was. He didn't see it right away, but when he saw it he knew that things were officially out of hand. Not only was the Impala on the roof of the Hospital, but it was also set on it's side across the gap between the two wings, 'I do what I want' painted on the undercarriage.
Castiel dreaded the call that he had to make to Dean.
Dean knew that this was it, the pinnacle, the icing on the cake, the prank to top all pranks. And Gabriel or Sam, possibly both, was going to kill him. Castiel had begged him not to do it but Dean was adamant. This would teach them to paint Baby.
It was a simple enough prank; all it consisted of was a firecracker, a can of paint, and a lot of newspaper. Dean wasn't even sure if it would work, he had seen it on an episode of Mr. Bean, but if it did he would gain the rank of ultimate prankster. Maybe even god.
He and Castiel spent the entire day wrapping every piece of furniture, appliance, and object in newspaper, making sure nothing was left. They lay the leftovers on the floor, not wanting to ruin the carpet. Dean then placed the can of paint in the center of the room on the table, raising it a little so it would cover as much area as possible. Lighting the fuse of the firecracker he placed it into the open can and ran for his life, dragging Castiel behind him.
Their apartment was ten blocks away from Sam and Gabriel's, but Dean swore on his life that he could hear Gabriel's yell.
Gabriel had come home to a vomit orange house, every single surface covered in paint, the remnants of the can of paint sitting on the coffee table. Unfortunately for Gabriel neither Dean nor Castiel had thought to shut the bedroom door, the splatter reaching all the way to their bed.
Not only did Castiel and Dean spend the next week repainting the apartment, they bought a new bed and sheets and were forced to sleep on the couch the entire time too, Sam and Gabriel taking over their bed until the apartment was finished. That was the last prank in the escalating war, both sides agreeing to the truce. It didn't put an end to the pranks; it just kept them from becoming outrageous again, neither side wanting to have a repeat of the last several weeks. And if Dean was ambushed by a bucket of water when he re-entered his apartment Gabriel would swear that it wasn't him.