A Titanic Tale Told in the Timely Fashion!

Showdown in Times Square

A few miles off the coast of New York.

            Jennifer Walters opened her eyes. The faint outline of the shore and the endless gray water of the Atlantic were the only things that she could see. The sun was low overhead and a bright red, making the ocean look like it was bleeding. The plane that was meant to take her back to Germany was now on it's way to the bottom of the Atlantic. Noticing for the first time that her skin was gray and that her body was not the same one she had yesterday, Jennifer began to worry. "I'm still the She-Hulk! Why haven't I changed back yet? Wait, it must be that medallion that I had. It…oh no, I dropped it when those goons grabbed me! Can I change back without it?"  Jennifer quickly started to tread water. "Now this is just getting monotonous. I can't even breathe without somebody trying to kidnap me. And why do I keep taking to myself?"

            Taking a few deep breaths, Jennifer began her long swim towards the shore. "Well, at least with this body I can make some good time. I wonder what happened to those two who were trying to kidnap me?"

Berlin, Germany

Julia Ratsel, better known to the leaders of the Reich as 'Krieger Frau' (or Warrior Woman, if one was so inclined) was at the moment standing before the heavy oak doors before her pondering that very same question. With her strength, she could have crushed not only the doors, but also all the people on the other side. Only one thing strayed her hand, an emotion she had thought long since banished from her mind: fear, fear of the people behind the door, and fear of what they would do to her as punishment for her failure. Ilsa, her darling Ilsa, had already had her time behind the doors, and when she exited the room almost an hour later, she couldn't even look Julia in the face.

A few minutes later, a harsh voice spoke: "Enter!" Julia hated the sound of the man's voice, but she knew better than to make the man wait. Walking into the room, Julia saw only two people. Her leader, Adolph Hitler, and the man she hated more than anything, her 'husband', Willie Lohmer-the Master Man. "Julia my dear, Ilsa was just telling about your disastrous mission. I'm having some trouble believing that a single American female could cause you to crash your plane into the Atlantic." Julia felt her mouth go dry and she struggled to speak, but her leader went on. " Of course, I have read the reports of this, ah, 'She-Hulk'. Do you think me a simpleton? This so-called creature just happens to appear and destroy everything in sight, and you are unable to capture or kill it? I think you simply failed in your tasks, and that you are trying to deceive me by concocting these fairy tales to hide your own incompetence!" Julia opened her mouth to speak on her behalf, but her leader slammed her fist down on the table. "I should have you sent to the Love Camps as a worker, but your husband has convinced me that I should you another chance. But should you fail again, you punishment will be unspeakable! Now, take your mate and find me the creature was suppose to be our newest weapon, but thanks to your idiocy, it is now running free. But thanks to the efforts of Herr Nacht, we have located the creature. I want you to go to the Russian boarder and bring that creature back alive! Now leave my sight!"

Julia was unsure she should have been happy or terrified at her new mission as she left the room, her husband Master Man walking along side her.

Moments after the two left, a small rat-faced man emerged from behind the curtains. "Mien Fuehrer, Project: Rache is ready, but I do have one question; why should we freeze those two? If, unlikely, we should lose this war, wouldn't Herr Skull's Sleeper robots be better at gaining revenge? Why freeze those two fools?" The dictator turned in his chair to face the smaller man. "Herr Nacht, you do not know the Red Skull like I do. He is far too ambitious, and at least I know how those two think. Now, leave me! I must plan, and I will have no one seeing me!"

            Saluting, the small man exited the room the same way he came in, leaving the most powerful dictator in Europe to his own devices.

  A few hours later in New York City

            New York City has been called the city that never sleeps. But during a blackout, it certainly gave that impression. Captain Ross, now dressed in civilian clothes, lit a match and read the message that had lead him to the Flairton Building.  The message looked like a simple telegram, bearing only the words: 'Believe rat is near the house. Stop. Go fetch the exterminators. Stop. Need to find latest Hammett story. Stop.' Ross lit the telegram on fire with his match and walked down a nearby alley. A figure dressed in an overcoat stepped behind him. Ross turned around, his hand going for the familiar sensation of the Colt he strapped to his shoulder. If the figure was in anyway intimated, Ross didn't have a clue. The figure spoke in a light voice. "Captain Ross, I presume?" The figure tossed the overcoat over, and in the moonlight, Ross could see that he was facing a tall man, wearing some kind of costume with a cowl that covered most of his head. Still holding his gun but not drawing it, Ross stepped back. "You know Hammett, right?" Ross replied, hoping that this strange man was his contact. The other man sighed. "I knew I should have picked a better codename. Oh well, who knew those silly books would be so popular?" The man then turned to the side, and Ross could have sworn that he disappeared, before the man repapered, seemingly right in front of his eyes. "Does that prove that I'm the Thin Man?"

Before waiting for a response for the astonished captain, the Thin Man pushed against a section of the wall. The wall slid back without sound to revel a lighted tunnel. "Captain Ross, if you would follow me please." Ross shrugged his shoulders and followed the man into the tunnel. He could see in the light that his contact really was a 'thin man'. The stranger was almost totally flat, like a drawing that somehow escaped the confines of the page.

Rounding a corner, the Thin Man pointed Ross to a small table in the center of the room. At the other end sat two people, a man and a woman, in costumes. The man was about Ross's height, had a yellow skullcap with wings on it, and he was dressed in bright yellow tights with big 'W' on the front. The woman was dressed mostly in red. A red, white and blue crest which reminded Ross of Captain America's old shield adorned her chest. A long blue cape rested on her shoulders. Both of them looked to be in their mid-twenties. "Captain Ross, meet the Whizzer and Miss America. I'm sad to say that we're the only members of the Liberty Legion here. The rest of our members are all on assignment elsewhere" The Thin Man said as his legs curled up like pasta strands as he sat down in the center of the table. Ross stared at the trio, and his hand slipped into his pocket. His fingers closed around the medallion that Yeoman Walters dropped. Taking it out of his pocket, Ross stared at the designs that seemed to stand out when the light played across it. He became so engrossed in looking at every little design that he failed to notice that everyone was staring at him. "Well Captain, what do you think?" The Whizzer said. Ross loosened his collar and slipped the medallion back into his pocket. "Right, sorry. Look, I need to find a yeoman named Jennifer Walters. General Philips" "Captain, we already discussed this. Weren't you listening?" Miss America said as she tapped her fingers impatiently. Ross looked down at the table as he tried to say something.

Meanwhile, in the harbor

            It had taken a while, but she had made it. The She-Hulk broke the surface of the dark water. Climbing up to the dock, the gray Amazon looked around. "Heh, I'm back on land. I'm not totally sure how I got here, but it doesn't matter. Funny, I feel…different somehow, like there's something I need, but I can't describe what it is." Walking around, the sound of breaking glass caught her attention. "What's that?" Turning her attention to the sound, she began walking towards whatever was making it.

            Todd Smith swore loudly as he dropped his last bottle of whisky. Cursing his life and his luck, he whispered harshly to the reason what he was standing outside in the cold instead of having a nice drink someplace warm. "Hey Vince, you finished or what?" It had been his idea to break into the Harbormaster's office during the blackout, hoping to find something worth stealing, but he was taking far too long for his personal comfort. "Fantastic. If a harbor patrol catches us, that would just make this lousy evening complete!" Todd paused in his rant when he heard something moving towards him, something VERY large. Thinking quickly (as quick as he could think, given the situation and his blood alcohol levels) he stumbled away from the sound, hoping to distance himself from his troublesome partner.

A large gray shape loomed in front of him. Todd stopped to look at the interloper, noticing for the first time that it was a woman standing in front of him. A woman who was barely dressed and looked like she could use some 'assistance', so being the good soul that he was, Todd walked over to the woman and tried desperately to say something witty. "Hey sweet stuff, need a hug? You look kinda cold there."

            Jennifer, no, why was she thinking of herself as Jennifer? The She-Hulk, that's what men called her, which was a much nicer name than that boring old Jennifer Walters and far more descriptive to boot. The She Hulk shook her head and brushed her raven black hair out of her eyes. She couldn't quite remember how she gotten out into the ocean, nor the reason she was standing alone in the dark. She was aware, however, of a small man trying to hit on her. The man barely came up to her breasts, and he was obviously drunk. An idea came to her, and she grinned like a cat that had just caught a fat mouse.

            Todd could barely believe his eyes when the woman walked up to and put her arms around him. And then he could barely breathe when she started to squeeze him a like a tube of toothpaste. "Guys! Help me!" He screamed as he felt his ribs beginning to crack. Vainly, he tried to kick at the monster that was slowly crushing the life out of him, but that only provoked the monster into squeezing harder. Dimly, he was aware of a sudden light that seemed to flood over everything before slowly succumbing to the wonderful feeling of being unconscious.

            The sudden light surprised the She-Hulk, causing her to drop the hapless fellow she was squeezing to ground. Hearing more voices coming from inside a nearby building, she grinned as she stood waiting for them to come to her.

            "Hey you old booze-hound, why didn't you tell us the blackout was over?" Vince called outside to the erstwhile lookout, unaware that Todd was now struggling to breath with several broken ribs and several other internal injuries. Vince, a tall man who might have passed for a twin of the famed boxer John L. Sullivan in his prime, walked outside of the Harbormaster's office only to stop dead in his tracks. Todd was laying in a heap on the ground, with a almost seven foot tall woman standing over him, dressed a showgirl Vince had seen once. "What the hell is going on, who are you?" Vince yelled, not really caring who heard him. The woman smirked and walked towards him, her hips rolling like gray ocean of muscle. "Your buddy was annoying me. You look like you got some fight in you, care to take me on?" Vince looked the woman up and down and started to back away. There was nothing to be gained by fighting, and she looked like she could probably handle herself just fine. But his choice in the matter had just been taken away as a loud siren pierced the night sky. For once in his life, Vince was actually glad to see  the familiar form of a black & white squad car driving towards them, it's horn blaring loudly in the night. The large woman, however, didn't seem to care too much for the noise. She turned towards the squad car, grinding her teeth. The car stopped and Vince ran straight to them. "Help, this crazy freak attacked my buddy, and she's going to kill me!" One of the officers's jumped out of the car and pulled his service revolver. "Alright, we got a report of a break-in. I don't know what's going here, but I want everyone here to put their hands in the air!" The officer looked rather nervous as he talked, and the gray woman snorted in disgust. "Sorry pal, I don't follow orders real well." Before Vince knew what was happening he was quickly picked up and hurled through the air like a baseball, his flight stopped short by the windshield of the parked car.

            Officer Stan Kirby and his partner Jack Thomas had both seen many unusual things in the Big Apple, but the following site took the kewpie. Stan moved out of the way as a man was tossed into their patrol car by some kind gray giant.

            Jack ducked down as the man crashed headfirst through the windshield. Looking up, Jack saw a woman, clad in some kind purple bathing suit just standing there, grinning at them. Grabbing the receiver, Jack quickly radioed in to the station. "This is car zero-fifteen down at the docks. We, Hell, I don't know what we have down here! We need a ambulance and back-up, and we need it" But Jack's transmission was cut short as the giant woman began to walk towards the car…

            Stan fiddled with his gun as he hid behind the car. "First the that Sub-Mariner floods us, now this. I never should have left Pittsburgh." Standing up, his revolver drawn, Stan stepped towards the woman. "Ma'am, please place your hands where I can see them. I am placing you under arrest for assault and destruction of police property. You have the right to remain silent, you have the right to an attorney, if, if" Stan was fumbling with his words as the woman smirked and walked to the car. "You call that" She flipped her thumb at the car "Destruction? Copper, I'll show you destruction!" Bending down, the woman ignored Stan as she started to pick up the car. "Jack, get out of there!" Stan yelled as he fired off three slugs, directly into the woman's backside. The slugs flattened against her skin and fell to the ground. The woman didn't seem to care for that, but she did drop the car. As she slowly turned around, Stan noticed that Jack had crawled out of the car; carrying out the poor bum she had tossed into it. But, to focus at the matters at hand, Stan now had to deal with a seven-foot tall woman with inhuman strength who was at the moment looking rather irate. Her voice sounded like a muffler being dragged over hot concrete as she spoke to the terrified officer. "Stupid little men, always shooting when you see something you don't like. I've been chased, kidnapped and almost blown up, and I'm getting sick of it!" Turning around, she gripped the car again, and with one heave, lifted it straight up over her head. "I'll smash you all!" she bellowed, and with one heave, tossed the car. Stan, having come face to face with something he never thought could exist off the printed page, did the only he could think to do: He fainted.

            Luckily, if that could be said in this situation, the car flew overhead just as Stan dropped, causing the car to miss him and fly out into the bay. The car hit the water with a big splash, and slowly began to sink.

The woman turned to Jack and snarled. "You bums got lucky, but if I see more of you creeps, you'll just wish the only thing I tossed at ya was a car!" With that, she took a standing jump and seemed to fly off into the night sky, towards the heart of the city.

Jack rushed over to his partner, who was just coming around. "Stan, you ok buddy?" Stan looked at his partner for a full minute before replying. "I should go into something less hazardous, like doing comic books or something."

A few minutes later

            As Ross looked at the two superheroes, a strange alarm began to sound. "What's that?" he asked as the Thin Man uncoiled himself and raced to a door where the sound was coming from. The Thin Man came bouncing back, holding a piece of paper. "That was our police radio monitor. Some kind of giant woman attacked two policemen and some thugs near the harbor." Ross stood up, a thin line of sweat breaking out on his brow. "Did they mention what happened to her?" he asked, the medallion feeling strangely heavy in his pocket. "Not really. She just tossed a car into the water and from what this says, she flew off towards Times Square." The Thin Man replied as Ross raced towards the door. "There's no time to explain, but we have to find that woman!"

A few minutes later, in the now bustling Times Square

            When the lights came back on, it seem that the entire city had woken up. Ross looked nervously around as the woman next to him patted his arm. "Miss America, are you sure you three can handle this?" The woman smiled as she looked up to the sky. "Relax captain. The Thin Man is watching us from his plane, and the Whizzer is on standby. But from what you said of this woman, I do wish that more of our team were here. We really could have used Jack Frost or the Patriot, but they're both on special missions right now. Oh, and you could you call me Miss Joyce, or Madeline, if you want." Ross looked around, seeing all the people hustling by, not paying any attention to them. "I thought all you super types were suppose to keep your identities secret?" Ross asked, somewhat confused. Miss America shrugged her shoulders and kept walking. "True, most of us do, but I never really had much use for the whole cloak and dagger games. Besides, the FBI already knows about me, so what would be the point?" Ross said nothing, but his attention kept turning back to the crowd. "Shouldn't we be evacuating this place?" said Ross, but Miss America shook her head. "According to the police band, they aren't taking those two officers very seriously, so they aren't doing anything. Besides, that Amazon of yours hasn't shown up yet, maybe she won't show?"

But, to prove that fate dislikes optimists, Miss America grabbed her purse as a beeping noise came out of it. "What's wrong?" Ross asked, already fearing the answer. Pulling out a small microphone from the purse, Miss America's face paled as she listened to the message. "That was the Thin Man. He just spotted your 'She-Hulk', and she's heading this way in" but the rest of what she was saying was lost as something very large and very angry landed in the center of Times Square. The impact sent up shockwaves that rattled everything and everyone. Ross crawled to his feet and saw what he had been looking for.

In the center of the crater stood a figure seven feet tall, with gray skin and hair as black as a Plutonian shore. She looked as if she had been craved from solid stone, but her curves were undoubtedly feminine. Her purple costume was clinging to her like a second skin as she stared down at Ross. For the first time, he noticed that her eyes were so clear that they were almost opaque as they seemed to bore holes into his hide. Looking past him, she centered her attention on the person behind him. Turning around, Ross saw that her attention was drawn to the prone form of Miss America.

Stomping over to him (her footsteps leaving near perfect impression in the pavement, Ross noticed) The gray woman reached and picked him up like doll. "You. I know you, why?" She growled as she continued to stare at Miss America. Her grip tightened around his neck to the point were he could barley breath. "Wait, who's that?" Tossing him like a sack of garbage, the She-Hulk rushed over to Miss America, a look of almost total hatred spread across her face. Before the stunned super heroine could do anything to defend herself, the She-Hulk picked her up by her head and tossed her headfirst like a shot put into one of the glowing neon signs that lit the New York landmark. The sign exploded into a shower of sparks and flame as she went headfirst into it. Ross saw the woman who insisted he call her Madeline only a few moments ago fall limply to the ground.

"No!" Ross screamed as he saw a yellow blur appear out of the crowd and swoop down to the fallen woman. The She-Hulk didn't seem to care too much about the woman she just tossed as she turned her full attention back to Ross. "Who was she? You have something I need" The gray giant's attention seemed to be divided as she stopped in her tracks. Her eyes seemed to darken, almost to a  light brown. "Wait, why am I feeling like this, that woman, why do I hate her, what's happening to me?" She screamed.

            Bob Frank, known to the adoring masses as the Whizzer, rushing as fast as he could (which, all things considered, was pretty darn fast) to the side of Miss America. "Maddy!" He cried as the still smoking form of his teammate started to move.  

            Standing up, Madeline Joyce seemed to be okay, the burned and smoking clothes notwithstanding. "Bob, I need you to control the crowd. That gray lunatic has got to be stopped." She said, walking into a nearby store that had been abandoned in the confusion. "Maddy, are you ok? You took a pretty nasty hit back there." Bob asked as Madeline Joyce slowly slipped off her skirt and tore the burning remains of her blouse off to revel the red tights of Miss America on underneath. Unfurling her cape, Madeline stopped long enough to pose slightly in a shattered mirror. "Bob, you know I got my powers when I was struck by lighting. I can't explain, but I feel like I used to, before my powers started to fade. Anyway darling, you just make sure the crowd and the police don't get in our way. I'm going to put that lady in her place, right now!"  

Slowly, Miss America floated up, and then in a blink of an eye, she disappeared, zooming off directly towards the raging pillar of muscle known as the She-Hulk.

            Ross had never seriously prayed for anything before, but as the seven foot tall woman leaned over him, her breasts heaving with every breath, Ross thought that there was no time like the present. The She-Hulk stared down at him, and for an instant, Ross could have sworn she looked like somebody else. The giantess seemed to be confused the closer she got to him, and Ross was very thankful for it. Feeling something hard poking him in the leg, Ross remembered the medallion that he had placed there earlier, the one that Yeoman Walters had dropped before she had been kidnapped by those two Nazi spies. Taking out of his pocket and holding it to his face, Ross noticed that the She-Hulk had stopped moving and was now staring intently at his hand, her eyes, in fact her very face now reminding him of Jennifer Walters! "What, what's happening to me?" She said quietly. Before Ross could react, the giant woman reached down and slung him over her shoulder like a second rate Fay Wray. "Hold still, I need someplace quiet to think." She rumbled, and before Ross was even aware of what she was doing, she leaped into the air and suddenly the ground looked very far away. Ross was vaguely aware of the air rushing past him before he passed out.

            "Should I try to shoot her down?" The Thin Man's voice crackled over Miss America's radio. "No, she has that captain hostage. Look, right now, I'm the only one here with the strength to deal with her. You and Bob work on containing this crowd and helping the police, ok?" The Thin Man radioed back a positive and soon Miss America was airborne herself, following the direction that that gray skinned monster had taken.

Rockaway Beach, near Queens

            The moonlight reflecting off of the waves was a relaxing sight, thought Captain Ross. Or at least it would have been, had there not been a seven foot tall woman who just demolished parts of Times Square with nothing more than her hands standing over him. The medallion that he had protected ever since Jennifer Walters had lost it was now winking at him in the moonlight from the hand of the She-hulk. "I should thank you for holding on to this for me. I thought I lost it when that gunsel in leather took me for a joyride." Bending over so that her nose was almost touching his face, she whispered in a husky voice "You know, you are kinda cute when you're asleep, and since the beach is deserted, you want" but tragically, before Ross could answer to any thing the gray Amazon had planned, a red and blue blur zoomed by and carried her off down the shore.

            "Alright lady, you might have gotten a few lucky punches in, but this is one American who doesn't know the meaning of the word quit!" yelled the red & blue clad dynamo as she grabbed the gray giant and tossed into the sand. The She-Hulk simply stood up and brushed the sand off of her purple costume. "Ok, I guess I had that one coming. Look, I wasn't in my right frame of mind at the time, but I'm feeling better now. So why don't we just" but whatever she said was lost as Miss America let loose with a right cross that sent the She-Hulk sprawling into the surf.

            Standing up and shaking the saltwater off of her, the She-Hulk looked like some great prehistoric monster rising up out of the depths. "Okay little girl, you want to play, then we'll play." Miss America stood her ground defiantly, at least before the She-Hulk reared back and nailed her. The impact knocked the smaller woman down the shore towards Captain Ross. "Miss America wait, I think I know" Ross tried to explain, but the heroine simply climbed out of the hole that her impact had made and flew back towards the She-Hulk without even bothering to listen to what the frantic man was shouting.

Swooping down like a dive-bomber, Miss America picked up the She-Hulk by her head and hoisted the taller woman up into the air. The She-Hulk thrashed around like a speared fish. Miss America slipped her left arm under the woman's jaw, while all the while pressing her right forearm against the side of her neck. With her super-human strength, Miss America could have crushed a steel bar with her hands, but the She-Hulk was barely feeling her attack. "What are you made out of? A normal person would have been out cold by now!" Miss America cried as she continued to tighten her grip on the struggling giantess. The She-Hulk's grip on the medallion was loosened by Miss America's attacks, and that sent the gray marvel into a frenzy. "No! I won't lose it, not after all this! With a loud grunt, the She-Hulk slammed her elbow into the flying heroine's stomach. The impact caused Miss America to spiral wildly into the sand, while causing the She-Hulk to drop like a stone into the surf.

Ross had had enough. He raced down the beach and got between the two super-powered women fighting. It wasn't until he had a irate gray giantess and a equally mad woman capable of flight and strength on either side of him that he realized that perhaps just standing back and watching wasn't such a bad thing to do in events such as this. Praying to every deity he could name, Ross shouted out to what he hoped wouldn't be his final words.

            "Yeoman Walters, I order you to stand down!" Captain Ross shouted as the gray woman in front of him closed her fist and prepared to drive into the face of the woman behind him. For what seemed an eternity the She-Hulk stood there, her face almost unreadable. Then, ever so slowly, she lowered her fist and walked out of the surf. "Captain Ross, are you out of your mind? This…this creature can't be who you're looking for!" The She-Hulk grinned slightly and started walking up the beach. "Honey, have I got a story for you!" The She-Hulk smirked as she walked up the beach, the medallion still gripped tightly in her hand.

After a long explaining of just how Yeoman Jennifer Walters became the She-Hulk [being injected with a version of the famed Super Solider formula and having the rotten luck to be caught in a explosion involving gamma radiation-in case you missed the first issue-D] Miss America sat down on the sand in silence for a few minutes while the whole story sank in. "Well, if the Whizzer can get super-speed from the blood of a mongoose, why not?" Standing up, Miss America walked over to the She-Hulk and took her cape off. "I'm sorry about attacking you, but are how do I know you won't turn savage again?" The She-Hulk shrugged her shoulders and looked at the medallion in her hand. "I can't promise I won't turn back into that monster. But I have some help here, and" rubbing her neck gingerly "I know that at least you of all people can handle me in a fight." Placated, the heroine tossed her cape to the startled Amazon and slowly floated into the air. "I have to get back and help the rest of the Legion with the crowds. Not to mention the damage we caused. Keep the cape, you might need it in the morning!" Miss America yelled as she gained altitude until she was nothing more than a speck of the horizon.

            Turning around, Ross noticed the She-Hulk had draped Miss America's cape over her shoulders and she was looking at him. "So, you figured out my secret." She said as she made herself comfortable on the sand. Ross quietly walked over and sat down next to her. "Well, I figured some how you were connected. I mean, that story about some giant woman breaking into your hospital room and kidnapping you was a bit much." The She-Hulk grinned and put her face in her hand. "Yeah, I guess that was a little weak. Still, I thought you suspected something when I almost lost on the Sub-Mariner's flagship." It was then that she had noticed the deep blush that had settled around the captain's face. "Ah, well, I did think something was amiss when I saw you, ah, grow in a few areas."

            The She-Hulk had a puzzled look on her face, until she looked straight down. "Growing, oh my." Giggling uncontrollably, the gray giantess looked at the blushing military man. "Well, I could see were that might be a cause for alarm. But what would you have done anyway?" Ross slipped his shoes off and stretched out on the sand. "I don't know, maybe ask Captain America for help?" Ross said, trying desperately not to laugh. The She-Hulk giggles turned into outright laughing as she looked at him. "I can see it now, 'Help Cap, we're being invaded by giant breasts!' I mean, can you just see the Human Torch's flame being smothered by a pair breasts?" Ross started to laugh out loud at the thought.

            After several minutes of sidesplitting laughter, the She-Hulk looked over at Ross. "You know, I never did get around to thanking you." She whispered as her hand gently stroked Ross's face. Ross looked at the gray skinned woman, a woman who a little more than twenty-four hours ago was six inches shorter than him. Ross's train of thought was derailed when she leaned over and kissed him.


            Ross was jarred out of his sleep by the sound of heavy footsteps coming toward him. Opening his eyes, he saw a police officer standing over him. "Excuse me buddy, but this isn't a hotel." The Officer said. Standing up, Ross brushed himself off and hurriedly put his shoes on. "Sorry officer, me and my friend here just, ah, went for a early swim. We'll be moving along now." The cop didn't look like he believed the story. "An early swim, in your suit? Right, hey, why don't you wake your pal up there, and then we'll see if I believe it."

            Turning around, Ross saw that Jennifer had covered herself up with Miss America's cape. "What if she's still the She-Hulk?" he thought as he nervously touched the cape and drew it to revel…. a perfectly normal looking young woman. Yawning she opened her eyes and stared at Ross and the cop. "Oh, morning. Is there a problem officer?" The Policeman averted his somewhat when he saw Jennifer's (the She-Hulk's really, but there was no need to tell him that) costume. "Well, the city is against night swimming, but in all the craziness that's been going on, I suppose I'll just let you off with a warning. But don't let me catch you again." The officer said as he turned around and headed back to his beat.           

When the man had walked far enough away, Ross looked down at Jennifer. "You're back to normal!" Jennifer almost looked disappointed as she slowly stood up. Her purple costume somehow managed to cling to her body, even though her proportions were no longer the exact same. "So what happens now?" she asked as she wrapped the cape around herself. "Well, I think we should contact the Liberty Legion again, and after that, I don't know." "Sounds like a plan." Jennifer as she and Ross walked off the beach and back towards the heart of the city.

Meanwhile, near Lubland Poland, a few miles from the Russian boarder.

            Hungry, that was the only thought that entered in the creature's mind. The creature that had been christened The Abomination was crawling in the bombed out remains of what was once a factory, scouring the place for anything to eat.

A strange yet somehow familiar sound startled the creature. The creature panicked as the building's walls began to shake and the sounds of people reached the creature's ears.

            "Gott in Himmel, what could our Fuehrer want in this hellhole?" A man's voice spoke in German. A woman's harsh voice spoke, a voice that seemed familiar to the creature, a voice that sparked a new sensation: Hate.

            Warrior Woman walked through bombed city, with her idiot husband in front of her, and Sky Shark behind her. Sky Shark was one of the finest pilots in all of Europe, and while she was thankful that he was able to help them in their mission, she was quickly growing tired of hearing the man's whining on being unable to best the Red Baron's score. "Eighty-eight my foot! That man barely knew how to work the controls!" A small metal box that she had been carrying gave a loud ring. "Shut up!" She said in a harsh whisper. "Sky Shark, go back to the plane and prepare it for take off. We've found our prey!" Master Man scratched his head as he looked at the device. "My darling, how do you know that this creature is close? I've haven't heard a thing since we landed here." Warrior Woman stifled the urge to smash something over the taller man's head. "I know you simpleton, because this device measures radiation. That creature was exposed to enough gamma rays to light up Berlin for a year, so that's why we have this. We track the gamma rays, we find the creature, understand?" Master Man looked down at the device and turned away. "If you insist. But I still think this is a stupid idea."

The creature, upon hearing the voices hid directly above the doorframe. Crouched, it waited. The woman's voice that had racked the creature's senses before seemed to bring some dim memory to the creature's mind. An image of a woman, dressed in a long white coat flashed before the creature's eyes. The creature shook the image away and concentrated on the task at hand. The voices came closer and closer…

"I tell you, we are wasting time on your silly theories. All we need to find this monster is some tanks and men. That is all we need, not your foolish feminine ideas, and that's what it will take to destroy this creature!" Master Man shouted as he walked into the factory. Hearing a slight hiss, Warrior Woman looked up, and saw the very thing she was hunting for. "Forget the tanks, we" but her sentence was cut short as the creature leaped from it's hiding place straight at Warrior Woman.

            With her enhanced strength, she was able to dodge the creature's attack. Her husband Master Man, on the other hand, wasn't as fortunate. So busy was he in his rant, he didn't hear his wife move, and he didn't even to bother turning around until he felt the impact of something large hitting his back. The variation on the Super-Solider serum that was coursing through his veins had made his skin almost as strong as reinforced steel. So he was fairly surprised when the creature that he had been ordered to capture had started to slice through his skin like a hot knife through butter. "Ahhh! Get it off!" he screamed as the creature proceeded to take a large bit out of his shoulder. Pain was a sensation that Master Man had thought removed from his psyche, but he was proven wrong as the creature's clawed foot connected directly with his groin.

Warrior Woman brushed the grime away from her black leather costume and took a seat as the creature mauled Master Man. "Hmm, this could be my chance to finally rid myself of this fool." Casually leaning back, she gazed over across the floor.

            Master Man was on his back, struggling to get the enraged creature off of him. His costume was in tatters, and his blood was rapidly spreading across the dirty floor. As arousing as his screams were, she knew even that titillation couldn't last, as she knew that if the creature escaped once more, then being married to that blubbering buffoon would seem like a reward compared to the punishment that awaited her failure.  

            Sighing, Warrior Woman picked up the device, which had tracked the creature down and dropped it. It hit the bare floor with a loud clang. The creature stopped the mauling of Master Man and looked in her direction. It's pupils were a bright green and seemed to give off an eerie glow. The teeth were jagged, and judging from the flesh of her husband hanging from her canines, quite sharp as well. Snarling, it leaped off of Master Man, hurtling towards her with it's claws reaching for her face.

            Jumping out of the way at the last minute, Warrior Woman cart wheeled over to the bloody form of Master Man. "Well, it looks as if our Fuehrer was premature in calling you 'Master Man'. As usual, it takes a woman to do what you are unable to perform." Turning around, she slipped a small vial filled a yellow liquid out of her glove. The creature prowled briefly around in the darkness of the factory before leaping at Warrior Woman again. The tall raven haired woman simply tossed the vial into the open mouth of the creature and stepped back. The glass broke, and the strange concoction bubbled down the creature's throat. The creature staggered back and attempted another charge, but the chemical had served its purpose. With a bare handful of steps, the creature toppled over like a sandcastle during high tide.

Grinning, Warrior Woman stood over the creature and spoke into a small radio. "Sky Shark, I will need your assistance in here after all. Oh, and please radio ahead to Berlin. The mission was a complete success." Laughing lightly, she bent down and started to tie the creature up. After fastening the bonds around it's hands, feet and face, the Teutonic Titian slung the unconscious being over shoulder like a sack of grain and started toward the transport plane.

She was almost out of the door when she heard a soft whimpering coming from the floor. Looking back, she saw a man barely five feet laying on the ground where Master man was, his face and torso a mass of blood. Grinning broadly, she walked over to the man and bent down so she could hear him better.

"Poor old Willie. Of all the times for that imitation Super-Solider formula to were off. From now on, you'll give more credit to my ideas, won't you?" She smiled as she placed her spiked high heel boot in the center of hi hand and stepped down, piercing the flesh and causing the already injured man to moan pitifully. "My love, help me… please!" he whined as stared down at him, like some kind of Amazon goddess staring at a cockroach.

With a great deal of reluctance (and dammed little care) Warrior Woman bent down and slung Willie over her other shoulder.

            "Alright, I'll save your worthless hide this time. But remember, your strength can leave you, mine can't, just in case you get any ideas on punishment, understand?" She heard a barely audible 'yes'.

As she boarded the plane, with Master Man bandaged up and her reason for coming out here tied up, Warrior Woman couldn't help but smile as the plane took off and made its way back to Germany. "Now" She thought as she stared out of the cockpit "If I could only find that gray skinned woman. I know I could defeat her. I will defeat her, my pride will not settle for anything less than utter destruction of that dammed woman!" Flexing her hand, she savored the thought of finding her opponent. "Mark my words, there is only room in this world for one Warrior Woman, and I will destroy all who stand in my way!" With that evil thought, she started to laugh. 

The end

Savage Correspondences

Wow, what an issue. I hope everyone enjoyed this. Now, normally I'd do some letters, but due a variety of events, I don't have the letters anymore. But I'll give some cheap pops to the people who did write me


Actually this wasn't a re-imagining of the Black Widow, it was the first one. She was a murdered psychic. Her first appearance was in Mystic Comics #4. (or if you want to check her out, and NOT spend a couple of grand, try MARVELS. She just has a cameo, but she's there (in the splash page where the heroes are parachuting in to attack the castle) My thanks goes out to Jess Nevins and his research on Golden Age characters

 I hope to do more golden age character fiction, so stay tuned


Well, I hope this satisfies you, one bear hug deluxe.

To Fonzie and the rest, hope you enjoy it, and be back in time to catch the next issue, where the She-Hulk battles the Abomination!

Keep 'em flying!


She-Hulk, Warrior Woman and the rest of the characters are all owned by Marvel comics.

The concept of a female Abomination was created by the Manic, all rights reserved