I was at the bar when a kid was being interviewed after losing to Takuto, the overwhelming tournament favorite who came out of nowhere to take the league by storm. The kid didn't seem to mind and said, "I will be back next year at the Unova League!"
"After so many failures after your victory at the Orange League, do you believe that you can finally end your championship drought at the Unova League?" the reporter asked.
"I have a feeling that it will finally happen and even if I do lose the next time out, I will still continue my journey so I can one day become a Pokemon master!"
I chuckled and said, "Maybe when the world ends."
Then the bartender came and said, "How long are you going to stay in the bar? You could go home and watch it there."
"I like watching it at the bar." I said.
"You're not even supposed to be here after what happened last year when you assaulted the writer of Forbes magazine, Tom Van Riper." he growled.
"He got what he deserved." I said as I took out an issue of Forbes magazine to show the bartender the article he wrote recently and continued, "Look at what he wrote! Sometimes I wonder if Forbes hired that guy to incite some readers to get extra attention."
"Why did you buy a copy if you have in issue with one of their writers? You do realize that you're helping Forbes to pay the man's salary right?"
"Never mind that, just take a look at what he just wrote!" I said.
The bartender then said, "Alright, alright, I'll take a look, but you could have look it up from the internet instead of buying a copy."
I almost gagged at the thought...I hate "what shoulda been done", it makes me feel like crap. I took a deep breath and said, "As I said before, never mind that...the headline should be enough to make you cringe, seriously!"
Not long afterward, the bartender tore the page right out of the magazine and lit it on fire with his lighter. After much of the page was burnt, he shook the burning paper to put the fire out and much of the burnt remains of the magazine page flew onto my face and I wiped them off. I hand the magazine over to the bartender and said, "See? Now you understand why, even if punching him in the face was a dick move but...do you really have to tear the page out of the magazine and light the page on fire?"
The bartender sighed and said, "Then you probably shouldn't have shown the article to me since there's NO WAY I WOULD STAY CALM AFTER READING THAT LOUSY PIECE OF SHIT!" as he proceeds to tear the rest of the magazine apart.
Some of the patrons were startled and I heard one of them said, "What the hell?"
"There are some good articles in the other parts of the magazine you know..." I sighed.
Later that day, some of my friends came in.
"Hey, Dennis! Thanks for saving the table for us!"
"It wasn't easy Rob." I said.
Then I heard the bartender yell, "You guys better not cause trouble like what happened last time, the whole thing nearly escalated into something out of NHL and we're lucky that Sean Avery was in the restroom at the time when you..." he pointed right at me, "...punched the writer of that magazine and his friends got up and then suddenly it turned into a mess!"
"It's not going to happen this time, I promise!" I said.
The bartender then shook his head and went back to clean the mug.
I remember what happened that day and he was right, Sean Avery would have jumped in to get involved for the hell of it. But the truth is that the situation that started the mess was kind of weird. When I punched Tom Van Riper in the face, he stumbed backward onto a shelf, knocking over some wine bottles that were stacked on top and they all roll off with each one hitting the guy in the head like something out of a cartoon. It's still amazing how none of the bottles broke since they're not even made with plastic glass...must have been a really strong glass, even if it's half an inch thick.
But then his friends got up from their table and one of them said, "You bastard, we won't let you get away with this!" and shoved me onto the table right behind me. Then my friends got up and one of them jumped the guy who shoved me and then the whole thing quickly grew out of control. Later on, once it was over nearly everyone became all beat up and worn when Sean Avery got out of the restroom and yelled, "WHAT DID I MISS?"
I could tell he was upset that he missed the action and the bartender was upset because...well...we trashed the bar.
It turns out that not only the bottles knocked the Forbes magazine writer out cold, the trauma to the head caused him to lose memory of what happened so he didn't remember who hit him. However, his party agreed not to sue the bar as long the guy responsible for the mess gets banned and that was me...but that doesn't stop me from coming however and there wasn't much he can do aside from refusing my order anyway.
"Have you seen the Pokemon battle today?" I asked.
"Yeah, it's pretty obvious who's going to win." said Rob.
"I know, that guy has legendaries, if he loses then the match would have to be fixed as hell!" said Justin.
"So who are you going to draft in Yahoo! Sports Pokemon Fantasy League? You have the top pick after all." asked Rob.
"I'm going to draft Takuto, with the stacked roster like that, it should garner tons of points for me. Gym leaders can wait until the second round since there will be tons of them left once I get there anyway." I answered.
"Speaking of Takuto, do you think he might have been feeding his roster some performance enhancing candies?" asked Rob.
I shook my head and said, "I doubt it...then again I really hope not because I met the guy few months ago, he seems to be an okay dude though I wasn't aware that he has such a stacked roster."
"You'll never know, I mean there are people who took the performance enhancing drugs and still look and seem normal. You can never really judge a book by its cover."
"True, I didn't really expect Andy Pettitte to have taken one when he was named on the Mitchell's Report. Clemens on the other hand, I can't say that I'm surprised since it does explains a bit...just surprised that David Ortiz wasn't named however and few years later, exposed."
Juan said, "Okay, enough with the talk, how far do you think this kid, Satoshi...though he called him 'Ash' for convienence, well how far do you think he will go on the Unova League?"
"When's the last time he won anything? He's pretty much one of the biggest choke artists in the history of Pokemon battles!" I said.
Then I continued, "His strategies are suspect and he finds a way to lose matches that he could have easily won. I know I couldn't hold the Takuto game against him, he has no chance but it doesn't excuse his previous defeats, it's ridiculous!"
"Three hundred bucks that he won't even get enough badges in time to even qualify!" answered Rob.
I said, "I'm betting five hundred dollars that he'll make it to the semi-finals again and loses to some random god-mode dude in a blowout fashion."
Then the person next to me said, "Seven hundred bucks that he won't even make it out of the preliminaries!"
Then Jim Fassel came and said, "I am raising the stakes right now. If this is a poker game, I am shoving my chips right in the middle of the table…anybody who wants out, can get out. This kid will make it back to the Pokemon League and out of the preliminaries, okay? This young Pokemon trainer will collect all eight badges in time to qualify in the Unova League and will go past the preliminaries!"
"So Jim, when are you going to get a coaching job again?" I asked.
"Sooner or later," answered the former NFL head coach.
"They can't blacklist me any longer, I will get that head coaching job again and I'm willing to bet everything I have that it will happen!"