Aftermath intro plays, with scenes featuring the eliminated contestants sliced in.
"Well, let's see then." "Nope, real."
"I wasn't trying to. I saw Kasumi."
"Well, good to see I got through to her. You know, eventually. Though I wish it didn't end in this."
Intro finishes, and cuts to a stage with Geoff and Bridgette.
"Dudes, what's up?" asked Geoff. "Welcome to yet another Total Drama All Stars Aftermath episode. I'm Geoff."
"And I'm Bridgette," said Bridgette. "And what a great series it's been. Betrayal, scandal, and fighting on all sides. You need an axe to cut through the tension on the show."
"Yeah, it's going to be tough for them to top that in season two," said Geoff.
"Oh, I'm sure our producer has a few tricks up his sleeve," said Bridgette. "Now, on tonight's show, we have the four recent eliminations of Total Drama . . ."
"Wait a sec Bridge," said Geoff. "Four? There have been five since our last episode: Carly, Ezekiel, Ayane, Kevin and Wallace."
"Yeah, about that," said Bridgette. "Ezekiel's disappeared. You know, again."
"Seriously? What is up with that?" asked Geoff.
"Don't worry, there have been a few good leads on the location of Ezekiel," said Bridgette. "Hopefully he's found and contained before he falls into a volcano with the prize money like last time."
"Let's hope so," said Geoff. "Also on tonight's show we have some never before seen footage, That's Gonna Leave a Mark, and Truth or . . ."
"Actually Geoff, maybe you should keep this week's monstrosity secret until we bring out our first guest," said Bridgette.
"Good idea," said Geoff. "And before we can do that, we need to introduce our rotating Peanut Gallery. How does that sound?" The audience cheered. "Alright. On tonight's show, we have Beth." Beth walked onstage twirling a fire baton. She threw it the air, but instead of catching it, it landed on the intern who received a concussion during the previous episodes. As expected, he caught fire and started running around screaming.
"Brick," said Bridgette. Brick jogged onstage, tripped over his shoelaces, and rolled into the back of the Peanut Gallery's seating area.
"Duncan," said Geoff. Duncan walked out onstage, punching the fiery intern on the way past. The intern now has a record of three concussions from three episodes.
"Justin," said Bridgette. Justin walked onstage, and immediately the room got 110% sexier.
"Katie," said Geoff. Katie walked onstage and took her seat. She was immediately followed by Sadie. "Erm, Sadie, you're meant to wait for your cue," said Geoff.
"But Geoff, if I don't come onstage with Katie, I'll break out in a stress rash and die. It's true," said Sadie.
"Seriously, you'll be apart for thirty seconds," said Geoff.
"I don't care, I'm not moving," said Sadie.
Geoff sighed in frustration. "Fine, whatever. Bridge, keep going."
"Umm, okay," said Bridgette. "We also have Lindsay." Lindsay walked onstage waving to everyone, struck a pose, then turned around and started walking offstage. "Wait Lindsay. This is Total Drama Aftermath, not a fashion shoot."
"Oops, sorry," said Lindsay, coming back onstage. "I thought the catwalk looked a little weird."
"What catwalk?" asked Geoff.
"That one right there silly," said Lindsay, indicating a black section of the stage. Upon closer inspection, this 'catwalk' turned out to be that poor intern.
"Right . . ." said Geoff, unsure of what to say. "We also have Staci." Staci walked out on stage, and seemed to be talking, but no-one could hear her. "Don't worry, her mic's broken right now." Staci heard him, and glared at him.
"And finally, we have Tyler," said Bridgette. Tyler started running onstage. Unfortunately, he didn't notice the unconscious intern in the way, fell over him, and crashed into Brick who was just getting up.
"Oh man, whose idea was it to get two klutzes on the one show?" asked Geoff.
"Hey man, I'm a pro when it comes to basketball," said Tyler.
"As well as wrestling, football and hockey," said Bridgette. "Or so you claim. Then you do something to completely embarrass yourself like trip over something, or walk into a wall."
"Ooh, you're a football player?" asked Lindsay, looking over at Tyler. "What was your name again?"
"Lindsay, it's me, Tyler," said Tyler. "You know? We're supposed to be dating?"
"Ty…ler?" said Lindsay, scratching her head. "I don't remember dating any Tylers."
"And her selective amnesia returns," said Duncan.
"Well, let's get into the show shall we?" said Geoff. "Let's bring out our first guest."
"Among this contestant's list of accomplishments are . . . nothing," said Bridgette. "And somehow, he still made it to eighth place. Please welcome, Wallace." Wallace walked out onstage and sat down.
"Hey Wallace, what's up dude?" said Geoff.
"The hotness in this room," replied Wallace. "When were you gonna introduce me to your friend over there?" As he said this, he indicated towards Justin.
"Umm, thanks?" said Justin, not sure what to think of this.
"Okay, so, Wallace, you managed to make it to eighth place without doing much," said Bridgette. "What's your secret?"
"I guess it's from my complete lack of threateningness," said Wallace. "Because really, I wasn't eliminated until I tried to interfere with Light's plans."
"Which you had more success in than Katniss has had all season," said Geoff. "How do you think that will affect the competition?"
"Light probably already planned for this kind of thing weeks ago," said Wallace. "Seriously, that guy has backup plans for his backup plans. As much as I hate to say it, he knows what he's doing."
"And you're gonna hate what we're doing," said Geoff. "Bridge, can I introduce it now?"
"Go ahead," said Bridgette.
"Alright," said Geoff. "Wallace, get ready for our new lie detector in Truth or Cyborg Sasquatchanakwa."
An animation featuring the words Truth or Cyborg Sasquatchanakwa appears, followed by Cyborg Sasquatchanakwa blowing the words up with its laser eyes.
Some loud, robotic footsteps are heard, and then Sasquatchanakwa appears onstage. "The rules are simple," said Geoff. "Tell the truth, or Sasquatchanakwa does this." Sasquatchanakwa turned its head to the unconscious intern, and fired a laser out of its eye, frying him.
"As if he hadn't suffered enough," said Wallace.
"So Wallace," said Bridgette. "In your honest opinion, who do you think will win?"
"Katniss," said Wallace. "That girl is tough. No matter what Chris throws at her, she comes out alright."
At this, Sasquatchanakwa aimed its eye at him. "You sure that's what you think?" asked Geoff.
"Come on, since when has a bad guy won Total Drama?" asked Wallace.
"Alejandro in World Tour," said Bridgette. "Or was it Heather?"
"Either way, it was terrible," said Beth. "Unlike when I won Action."
"Pretty sure I won that one," said Duncan.
"Come on, that'd be like saying Gwen won season one," said Katie.
"Gwen did win season one," said Sadie.
"Oh, yeah," said Brick sarcastically. "And Lightning won Revenge of the Island."
"Why did you say it like that?" asked Staci, leaning into his mic. "He did win." Brick shoved her away from him.
"We're gonna have to look in this," said Geoff.
"Well, we need to move on now," said Bridgette. "But before we do, let's hear from home, shall we?" A large TV screen dropped down from the roof, displaying Scott's face on it.
"Hey guy," said Wallace. "What's going on at home?"
"Wallace, where are you?" asked Scott. "I need your help. Apparently Ramona has ANOTHER evil ex, and . . ."
"Seriously? Eight evil exes?" asked Wallace. "Getting kind of old now isn't it?"
"No, seriously Wallace," said Scott. "You think Gideon was bad? This guy is . . ." Suddenly, Scott was picked up by someone and flung across the room. A second later, the camera disconnected.
"Alright, speak to ya later Scott," said Wallace.
"Umm, shouldn't you go help him?" asked Brick.
"You're a cadet aren't you? You help," said Wallace.
"No way, I'll do it," said Tyler. "I was on the wrestling team in junior high."
"As a water boy," said Duncan.
"Why don't both of you do it?" asked Geoff. "We know where that camera was, and there's a helicopter on the roof. Let's see Brick and Tyler save the day." This brought a cheer from the audience as Brick and Tyler were led offstage.
"We'll check on them later," said Bridgette. "In the meantime, let's bring out our next guest."
"Even though she won two challenges for her team, she was still voted off by them," said Geoff. "Please welcome our claustrophobic internet star, Carly." Carly (still showing signs of being burned) walked out onstage and sat down.
"So Carly," said Bridgette. "You're currently the only contestant this season to quit. Any regrets?"
"Yeah, I regret walking into a massive inferno and getting horrifically burnt, leaving me unable to compete," said Carly. "Other than that, no."
"Yeah, bummer about that," said Geoff. "Now, about Katniss's deal . . ."
"I wasn't gonna take it," said Carly.
"What? Why not?" asked Bridgette.
"Because whenever I meddle in someone else's affairs, something bad happens," said Carly. "Sure, everything works out in the end, and the events that happen in between are quite hilarious, but I didn't want to have to go through that part first."
"Is that why you quit?" asked Geoff.
"No you idiot, I had burns to over 90% of my body," said Carly.
"Oh, right," said Geoff. "Well, how about a call from home?" The TV screen dropped down from the roof, revealing Sam, who was taking up practically the whole screen.
"Hey Carly," said Sam. "What up?"
"Hey Sam," said Carly. "Why are you that close to the camera?"
"Oh, you know . . ." said Sam.
"You know?" asked Carly.
"Hold on, I'm still trying to think of an excuse," said Sam.
"Sam, what have you done this time?" demanded Carly.
"Hey, Spencer helped," said Sam, who moved away from the camera, revealing a large smoking crater behind her.
"Do I even want to know?" asked Carly.
"Well," started Sam. "Apparentally, fireworks will not carrying anything heavier than itself." A male voice was then heard saying something off screen. "Shut up Freddie," said Sam, who took off her shoe and threw it at him.
"Okay, well, I'll see you guys soon," said Carly. "Remember to hide the evidence."
"Don't worry, I learned my lesson last time," said Sam as the line disconnected.
"Well, that explosion left quite a mark," said Geoff. "Speaking of leaving a mark . . ."
"Worst segue ever," said Wallace as the TV descended from the roof.
An animation plays for That's Gonna Leave a Mark.
Chris and Chef are seen examining the area the inferno challenge took place. "You sure this thing will work?" asked Chris. Chef smiled and pushed a button. Suddenly, a massive explosion threw Chris into a nearby tree. "I'll never doubt you again," said Chris.
Chris is seen sitting on the electric lie detector chair. "Hey Chef, look at me," said Chris, then proceeded to speak in a sarcastic tone. "Durr, look at me, I'm a Total Drama contestant." Suddenly, the chair electrocuted him. "Hey, sarcasm isn't lie," said Chris. "And anyway, I'm not even strapped in."
Ayane just landed on her feet after being ejected by the Rollerchriser. Suddenly, Bart landed on top of her. And then Ash landed on top of him. And then Katniss landed on top of him. And then Wallace landed on top of all of them.
Kevin is seen trying to creep into the campfire area, when he accidentally stepped on a twig. Ash's Pokémon suddenly turn and see him. "Uh, oh," said Kevin, before running off camera with Tauros right behind him. Several crashing sounds were heard, along with Kevin's agonising screams.
And finally, Bart is seen falling from the cliff. And hitting every ledge, rock, and jagged surface on the way down. Not the first time someone in his family has done that.
The TV went rose back into the roof. "Wow, man, that was brutal," said Geoff.
"But not as brutal as our next guest," said Bridgette. "Not only did she lose to her arch nemesis Wallace, but Sasquatchanakwa's body was used for genetic experiments, and her runaway shinobi sister was at the camp the whole time. Please welcome Ayane." Ayane walked out onstage, and punched Wallace as she sat down.
"Whoa, nice," said Geoff. "So Ayane . . ."
"Stop. I don't *beep* care," said Ayane. "I'm only doing this because apparently it was in my contract, then I'm outta here."
Bridgette looked at her in confusion. "Okay," she said. "So, losing to Wallace . . ."
"Don't *beep* remind me," said Ayane, and from her expression, it was clear that if they continued they would regret it.
"Okay . . ." said Geoff. "Kasumi . . ."
"That little red haired *beep* better look out," said Ayane. "Because next time I see her I'll *beep* kill her."
Geoff leaned over the Bridgette. "Hey Bridge, can we really allow her to make a death threat on national TV?"
"They'll probably edit it out when this goes to air," said Bridgette, before turning back to Ayane. "Now, about our cyborg . . ."
"I have already resolved to kill your producers," said Ayane. "Seriously, those *beep* shouldn't be *beep* around with this *beep*."
"Why are purple haired chicks so vulgar?" asked Geoff.
"What did you call me?" demanded Ayane.
"Umm . . . let's go to your message from home shall we?" said Geoff, and a TV dropped down from the roof. On its screen was Shiden.
"Shiden," said Ayane, bowing towards him.
"Stop, Ayane," said Shiden. "I have an urgent message for you."
"What is it master?" asked Ayane, still bowing.
"You must team up with Kasumi to stop DOATEC," said Shiden.
"What? But Genra said . . ." started Ayane.
"Ayane," said Shiden. "What's more of a threat to our survival: a runaway shinobi, or the company intent on destroying our way of life?"
"But . . ." said Ayane.
"No back talk," snapped Shiden. "Put aside your differences and defeat them." The connection then cut out.
Ayane glared at the TV, then got up. "Sorry, gotta go," she said. As she left, she punched Wallace in the face again.
Bridgette and Geoff just stared at each other. "I'm not sure what to make of any of that," said Bridgette.
"Wanna just move on to this week's never before seen footage?" asked Geoff.
"If it will make this situation less awkward," said Bridgette.
"Alright, I'm sure many of you have been wondering what future challenges are in store for our contestants," said Geoff. "And the great thing about a show with hundreds of hidden cameras is that we can find plenty of footage of Chris setting those challenges being set up."
"I thought Chris just got cheap prison labour to have everything set up between each episode," said Duncan.
"How would you know that?" asked Justin.
"Because I helped set up most of the challenges for season," said Duncan.
"Ah, there we go," said Staci. "I fixed my mic guys."
"Oh, hey, that's great," said Geoff in mock enthusiasm.
"I was able to fix it because my great-great-uncle Joseph invented them," said Staci. "Before him if people wanted to be heard on TV they needed to cup their hands over their mouths and yell. So sad."
"And now you know why we broke it in the first place," said Geoff sarcastically.
"And yet, you also have . . ." started Duncan as a high pitched squeaking sound pierced the air. It stopped shortly afterwards, and Duncan pointed at Sadie and Katie. "Them on the show."
"How can we help it?" asked Sadie. "Justin just dropped his gum on the floor."
"I got it. I get to keep it," said Katie.
"Guys, that's bordering on stalkerish," said Beth.
"No fair, I was talking to them," said Sadie, trying to wrestle the gum away from Katie.
"As I was saying," said Geoff, ignoring Sadie and Katie. "While we can't tell you what the coming week's challenges are, we can give you hints based on this footage of Chris getting them organised. Let's watch." The TV then began showing shots of Chris working (for once).
The first one showed several convicts (including Duncan) building wooden ships as Chris came up. "Come on people, I need those finished soon," said Chris. "Now, where's that giant fog machine?"
The next shot showed Chris and Chef filling several cardboard milk cartons with milk. The camera then moved away from them until it was looking at a red bottle, which Chef immediately snatched away.
Another shot showed Chris looking out the window of a castle-like structure.
After that, there was a shot showed Chris loading several small safes onto an airplane.
And finally, there was a shot of a wall with several ropes leading through it. What was on the other side was left a mystery.
The TV went back into the roof as it finished showing the scenes. "Well, what do you guys think?" asked Bridgette.
"Did I see tabasco in that second shot?" asked Duncan.
"Wait, there were only five challenges shown," said Beth. "There should have been six."
"That's because Chris is keeping the final challenge a heavily guarded secret," said Geoff.
"But why would he hide the most important challenge of the season from everyone?" asked Lindsay. "It doesn't make any sense."
"Well, we only have one more contestant . . ." started Geoff.
"Hold on," said Bridgette. "I just got word that the fight we sent Brick and Tyler to help with has ended, and we can cross to them right now."
"Alright, let's goes," said Geoff. The TV dropped down again, and showed Brick and Tyler in crumpled heaps on the floor, with Scott standing triumphantly on top of a large pile of money. There was a hole in the wall beside him.
"What the? What happened?" asked Bridgette.
"What happened was that I kicked the guy's ass," said Scott.
"That a boy, Scott," said Wallace.
"What happened to your nose?" asked Scott.
"Wait, you were struggling before," said Bridgette. "That's why we sent Brick and Tyler."
"Yeah, I was struggling at first," said Scott. "Then those two idiots came up, got clobbered, and while I watched them I figured out his fighting style and used it against him."
"Right," said Geoff. "And what was his fighting style?"
"He just punched in the direction of his opponent until he hit something," said Scott. "He got his arm stuck in the wall, then I clobbered him."
"And where is he?" asked Bridgette.
"Here," said Scott, holding up the money.
"That doesn't make any sense," said Geoff.
"Who's complaining? Not me," said Scott, as the TV disconnected.
"And on that note, we go to our final guest of the evening," said Bridgette.
"He took down most of Light's gang without being present," said Geoff. "He's Total Drama's number one trap setter, Kevin." Kevin walked out onstage.
"So Kevin, how's it going?" asked Bridgette.
"Fine," said Kevin. "Wish I hadn't ticked off Light's team though."
"You're not the only one," said Wallace.
"I want to clarify something," said Bridgette. "Did you and Katniss ever . . ."
"No, I only ever kissed Carly," said Kevin.
"On accident," said Carly immediately.
"And not what I was going to say," said Bridgette. "I was going to ask if you and Katniss ever teamed up."
"Not really," said Kevin. "I mean, I support her, but I never joined her team."
"So you want Katniss to win?" asked Geoff.
"What? No. I'm supporting Zidane," said Kevin.
Carly gave him a dirty look. "Why would you support the guy who kept taking my bra?" she asked.
"Because he taught me how to do this," said Kevin, holding up Carly's bra. Carly gaped at him, before slapping him and taking her bra back. "Doesn't matter, got to second base," said Kevin.
"Speaking of women who want to hit you," said Bridgette. "We have a call from home for you."
"Oh God, don't tell me . . ." said Kevin, as the TV dropped down from the roof again, revealing his mother on the screen.
"KEVIN!" she screamed. "WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU NOW?!"
"Mum, relax," said Kevin. "I was just competing on a TV show for a million dollars. No big deal."
"NO BIG DEAL?!" she shrieked. "WHAT CITY ARE YOU EVEN IN?!"
"I don't know, whatever one that producer guy led me to," said Kevin.
"Well, stay where you are," said his mother sternly. "I'm coming to get you, and then dragging you back home by the ear." The TV then disconnected. Kevin gulped nervously, realising something horrible was coming his way soon.
"Ooh, that sounds bad," said Geoff. "But something that isn't bad is Total Drama All Stars, which is now in its final weeks."
"That's right Geoff," said Bridgette. "Stay tuned, because there'll be more action, more mayhem, and loads more drama next time, on Total Drama All Stars."