Word Count: 419

Pairings: One-sided Stiles/Erica, one-sided Derek/Erica, implied Boyd/Erica (this is not a romance, it's just me being emotional about Erica.)

Notes: Angst and self-loathing. Erica feelings jam. Kind of a stream of consciousness.


Erica has never felt pretty in her life. Before the bite, she remembers how she would look in the mirror and scowl because there was too much acne, too much tummy, too much sad. After the bite, she looks in the mirror and sees nothing but anger. Sure, her makeup accents her face in all the right ways and she wears clothes that make boys look at her (but not Stiles; never Stiles.) but it's not enough.

Her mother tries to make her take the corsets off and even goes so far as to try to hide her makeup. But her father comes into her bedroom and kisses her forehead while he gives it back. "You are beautiful, mi hija," he says. Dads are supposed to say that.

Derek throws her off when she tries to kiss him. She feels the bruises on her body heal, but the bruises on her heart don't. Then he sends her off to seduce Scott or Stiles, but that proves to be as difficult as she thought it would be, because she's still not pretty. The boys who matter still aren't looking.

When Boyd asks her to leave Beacon Hills with him, it's not because he thinks she's pretty. Erica isn't willing to lie to herself about that. But she jumps at the chance, anyway, and then she's got a bellyful of arrows and electricity running through her veins in the Argent's basement.

She doesn't cry until she's watching Gerard beat up Stiles. He never looked at her but she'd never stopped looking at him. When she looks at Boyd after Stiles is crawling out of the basement, he's crying too. So it doesn't matter that she's still not pretty, because Boyd asked her to come with him. Maybe it's better this way, if she doesn't expect anything.

Chris Argent let's them escape, but it's like nothing ever stops, because the alphas catch them. Her life has never been worse, but it's never been better, either, she thinks. A seizure could have killed her at any time, especially if her stupid classmates had tried anything.

Boyd grabs her hand as they run, and when they hear the howls, his fingers crush hers.

If she's going to die, she thinks, at least it's with someone who saw her. She still doesn't feel pretty, but his hand grounds her. She thinks, I can do this. And then she drops his hand and falls into a defensive pose.

She's not pretty, but she's not weak, either.


Disclaimer: I don't own Teen Wolf

A/N: This was supposed to be a fluffy cute Erica one-shot that was kinda about her and Boyd falling in love but then I got mad at my subconscious for trying to make a girl feel validated based on a boy thinking she was pretty and this came out instead.

(Don't misunderstand me; feeling pretty is a very awesome thing especially when the boys that matter think you are pretty. But the way I think of Erica didn't exactly line up with that oops)

Anyway, follow me on tumblr. My personal blog is imagreatbowler and my writing blog is neverendingpaintrain. :)