(My dear readers, I have decided to conclude this part of the story and this chapter will be the last one. I want to thank you all for your continued support, you have been wonderful and have kept me motivated for so long. I hope you have enjoyed reading it as much as I have enjoyed writing it. A great big thank you!)

It wasn't easy for Enjolras to go outside again after he had been found by one of the persons he feared most. It wasn't easy at all. In every man he came across, he saw the face of his tormentor. And the longer he was out there, the harder it seemed for him to breathe. All he wanted to do was to go back inside as fast as he could. All he could think about was how it wasn't safe out here. Combeferre's steadying hand didn't do much to comfort him. Neither did his encouraging smile. But Enjolras forced himself to pull through and he tried to make his friend proud. He accompanied Combeferre to the square market where they bought their groceries and he even allowed his friend to take him on a little stroll down the river. He managed to keep his mouth shut for an hour. But then it got too much and he pleaded with Combeferre to return home. Combeferre had only smiled at him and nodded his head. He told Enjolras he had already done better than he had expected.

They decided to go outside for a little while every day that week. And although Enjolras was reluctant to leave the apartment each time, the actual moments they spend outside got easier the more often they went. Enjolras still stayed very close to his friend and he still kept his look trained mostly on the ground except for the few skittish looks he threw around him, but the more often he went outside, the easier it got to breathe normally. And the more often he walked around the market, where there were lots of people, the more confident he got that there wasn't anyone looking for him. Even though the fear never fully left, he was able to force it to the back of his mind and take control of his emotions. He got better at keeping those dreadful memories at bay and he even started to enjoy his strolls with Combeferre again. He still refused to leave the apartment on his own, that was a goal that needed some more preparation and some more confidence, but both Enjolras and Combeferre were grateful with the progress they had made in only a weeks' time.

Combeferre even arranged a meeting with Feuilly half way through the week. He didn't take Enjolras to the little bookshop of course. His young friend wasn't ready for that and Combeferre made sure to avoid that part of the city as much as he could on his walks with Enjolras. He decided to meet Feuilly in a little Café that was pleasantly crowded and the three of them enjoyed a hot chocolate and talked about literature, history and politics. Feuilly had been really happy to see his previous coworker back on his feet again. He'd come to care for the boy and he liked hanging out with him, discussing with him. He had been very worried after the blonde had stormed out of the little bookshop two weeks earlier. Enjolras on his part, was just as glad to see Feuilly as well. Combeferre had kept it a surprise and the look on his young friend's face when he saw the ginger haired boy sitting in the Café was priceless. The three of them decided to get together more often. Feuilly came over the next day for dinner.

The nights were still the hardest. Not a day went by where Enjolras didn't have a bad dream. And they were still as awful and vivid as they had always been. Dealing with his sleeping problems proved to be a bigger task than convincing Enjolras to go outside. He still slept in Combeferre's bed, his own bed was pretty much forgotten. It took Enjolras more than a week to sleep more than five hours. It took him another week to sleep through the night. And another to sleep without nightmares dominating his every thought. It was only then, when the nightmares became less and less frequent, that Enjolras moved back to his own bed. The whole process started over then, but both boys dealt better with it and within a week, Enjolras was able to sleep soundly in his own bed. The nightmares never stopped coming and they never got less horrifying, but they were more the exception now than the rule and even if he suffered from a bad dream, Enjolras was able to shut it out and go back to sleep again.

Combeferre started going back to his classes a week after he had taken Enjolras outside for the first time. Both the medical student and his young friend were nervous when that day came. Combeferre wasn't looking forward to leave Enjolras alone and Enjolras was really not happy with being left alone and vulnerable at the apartment. The first few days of that week, he made sure to check the lock at least five times an hour and he always pushed the kitchen table in front of the door. Combeferre couldn't help but feel extremely guilty every time he closed the front door behind him, even though the happiness and gratefulness, that poured from Enjolras' face when he got back, warmed his heart. After his classes, Enjolras always gave Combeferre the time and space to work on his studies and assignments. He tried to help wherever he could, rereading his friends essays, or he grabbed his own books and attempted to enlarge his own knowledge. The more classes Combeferre went to, the faster it was for Enjolras to get used to being on his own again. After less than two weeks, Enjolras no longer hid in his bedroom with all doors locked until Combeferre came back, but he was able to sit quite comfortably at the kitchen table with a cup of tea and his books and notes.

All in all, it took Enjolras little more than a month to fully get back to himself. He was still scared and wary at times, but he no longer let those feelings of fear and anxiety dominate his life. He worked hard to get back on his feet and take control over his own life. The more things he tried to do, the more confident he felt in doing them. He no longer thought he was a burden to Combeferre and he never doubted his friend's love for him. After that month, he even started thinking about finding another job again. That meant going outside on his own however, and that was still something that he found very hard. He still relied on the safety that was Combeferre and he didn't know how long it would take for him to fully step away from that.

The two friends were just planning their trip to Combeferre's parents when there was a knock on the door. Neither of them were expecting anyone and Enjolras' heart immediately started jumping in his chest. Yes he had gotten a long way, but it still frightened him when someone came to their apartment unannounced. Combeferre offered his young friend a reassuring smile and stood to open the door. It was Feuilly. The freckled boy greeted them and thanked Combeferre when the medical student invited him inside. He seemed nervous and a little on edge.

"What a surprise, Feuilly," he said kindly. "Come in, what brings you here?"

Feuilly smiled and sat down at the table, fidgeting with an envelope in his hands. "I… I can't stay long.. Mister Beaumont only gave me a few minutes off. But uh… Well, I thought it would be best if I came right away…," he focused his attention on Enjolras. "A letter arrived at the store today… addressed to you…"

Enjolras swallowed thickly and quickly glanced at Combeferre. This couldn't be good. They were going to come for him. He knew it…

Combeferre seemed a little tense himself as well, even though he tried to stay as calm as possible. He took the letter from Feuilly and handed it over to Enjolras. "Best to open it right away, my friend…"

Enjolras was trembling and he shook his head. He didn't want to read the letter. He didn't want to open it. He wanted to throw it away, rip it to pieces, burn it. It could only mean bad news and now that he had come so far, he didn't want anything to wreck that. He'd rather not know.

Combeferre just looked at him sympathetically and then opened the letter himself. His eyes flew over the piece of paper, a small smile playing at his lips as he read. When he was done, he handed the letter over to Enjolras again. "You should read this," he said kindly, "Don't be afraid, it's okay, just read it. It's not what you think it is."

With shaking fingers, Enjolras folded the paper open. He immediately recognized the graceful handwriting. He had only seen it a few times in his life, but he knew it by heart. It was exactly the same as his own.

Dear Julien,

Of all people, I am the last person who deserves to write you and it has taken me a long time to find the courage to put these words on paper. I would understand it if you'd want to rip this letter to pieces right now, never to be seen again. But I ask you to read it first.

I would like to start with apologizing to you. There are no words to describe the sorrow and guilt I feel for abandoning you all your life. After your brother died, I died as well. I lost myself and I lost you in the process. That is something that I can never fix and I don't expect you to ever forgive me for it. Please know that I never held you accountable for your brother's death. I never wanted your father to treat you the way that he did and I will forever regret that I chose to keep silent. I should have taken you away. Your miserable life is as much on me as it is as on your father's. I might not have hurt you physically, but I know I hurt you emotionally and to me that is even worse. When you did not return after your visit to the De Courfeyracs, I realized my faults. I lost one son due to criminality and injustice. I lost the other to my own stupidity. I miss you with all my heart and there is nothing I would rather do than to hold you in my arms and keep you there forever, protecting you, healing you. But I do not expect you to ever return home, there is nothing here that is worthy of you. My son, I am incredibly proud of you. Despite all the horrors you have had to go through all your life, you have grown up to be a wonderful young man full of passion and life. Henri would have been so proud as well.

I don't know if this letter will ever reach you. You might not even work at the bookshop any more, but I had to try. When De Courfeyrac returned from his trip to Paris, he told us that he had found you there and that you fled the store immediately. Please do not be afraid. There is nobody looking for you now. As much as it hurts me to write this, your father never once attempted to find you after you ran away. He did not care and he still does not. However, I cannot say things will stay that way for certain. There may come a time that he will change his mind. That is why I am sending you this letter.

For years I have saved money and send it to my good friend living in Paris. You have never met her, but she is a good woman, honest and just. On the sixth of June, I have asked her to meet you at Café Musain. It's a small and quiet café. She's the owner. When you get there, ask for Madame Hucheloup. Tell her your name is Fontaine. She'll know you're my son. The money I have saved for you is enough for an education. More importantly, however, is that she'll be holding a very valuable document for you there. I have arranged a false birth certificate for you. From the moment you are in possession of that document, you'll no longer be the son of George Enjolras. From then on, you'll go through life as the cousin of my grandniece, Eguerre. She is aware of this. My dear son, I know it has always been your dream to study Law and I hope this way you'll be able to fulfill that dream. It does not make up for the years of neglect and neither is this solution an ideal one. But it is the only thing I can offer now.

Julien, wherever you are, I hope you have found a better life. I pray for you each morning and each night. I hope you'll find safety and friendship, love and kindness. I have no doubt you will grow up to be a good man. You're destined for something great. That is something I have always felt from the moment you were born.

I love you with all my heart,

Your mother,
Celine Enjolras

Enjolras read the letter three times. Then he stared at Combeferre in utter disbelief only to read the letter another five times. He couldn't believe this. This couldn't be true. But if it was true… If it was true… He was offered a chance to start over. To start over completely. To make something of his life.

"What?" Feuilly asked nervously, looking from Combeferre's smiling face to Enjolras' shocked one. "What? What's in the letter? Is it bad?"

Combeferre only smiled brighter and reached out to pull his young friend into a tight embrace. Enjolras let out a small gasp of surprise and then all but clung to the older student. His heart was beating far too fast and his head was spinning. When he finally pulled back, tears were shining in his eyes. He turned to Feuilly and laughed.

"I'm out," he whispered, smiling an honest smile for the first time in months. "I'm out, Feuilly, I'm really out."

The End.

(I decided to end the first part of the story here. I am planning to continue this story (with a time lapse) if people want me to. The new part of the story would include more of the Amis and new plot twists. Please review and let me know if you'd be interested in a continuation. Thank you all for your wonderful support on this story. It means a lot to me and without you, I wouldn't have been able to continue this for so long.

PS: a little shout out to The Grandeurs of Despair, her story 'An Act of Kindness' deserves more attention.)