Misdirection

Shego convinced Kim that her plan was the better one, and now Kim was regretting that decision. Sometimes its best not to know what happens behind closed doors... KiGO

This story is not for profit. It's just a story I wrote to entertain myself and to poke fun at a few things.

Chapter 4 - Photo Finish

"Shego what are they saying? Are they talking shop? Why is Yori even there?" asked the teen impatiently. Kim was bouncing up and down on her tiptoes trying to reach for the headphones.

Shego was thankful the younger woman was shorter and was having difficulty in snatching the headset. She swatted the petite hands away from her head. She hated anyone touching her head, even her girlfriend. As far as she was concerned, it was the height of rudeness. The man could be the most infuriating thing on the planet he wanted to dominate, but at least Drewbie never did that to her while they were on a job. He wouldn't have dared. Their contract explicitly stated no touching. Even accidental touching resulted in a fiery response. A flaming mullet might sound wonderful as a cocktail but the reality was far different. Luckily Drakken had a high tolerance to pain.

The older woman twisted her body so she couldn't be distracted any further, and to prevent her girlfriend yanking the listening device from her head. "Shhhhh... Kimmie, please, stop doing that. I can't hear anything if you keep talking and trying to grope me and the equipment," said Shego.

Kim obviously didn't like that she was missing out on the action. The redhead reacted by standing still, crossing her arms and giving her lover a look of extreme annoyance. Shego had lost count how many times Kimmie had done that in the short time they were in the apartment. She needed to tutor Kim on the etiquette of surveillance for the next time, that's if she could even convince the hero to come along to a stakeout the next time. Note to self, either setup up the surveillance equipment properly or get Kimmie her own set of headphones and equipment.

Shego shut her eyes and continued listening. "Oooh... Betty has just told Yori to go and get ready and to join her in a moment... 'Oh I won't be too long, Betty-chan' ... Doesn't she sound all polite and proper... I can hear footsteps….. Ooh, now it's gone very quiet in there. What the heck are they doing?"

Shego was getting frustrated. She hated being out of the loop and prided herself on her sneaky skills. The next time I have to plan a job far better than this, she thought.

"Ah Shego," said Kim interrupting Shego's concentration once again.

"Not now, Kimmie. Let me work in peace for few moments." The older woman was starting to get a little peeved at all the intrusions. She turned the volume up, hoping to hear anything from the apartment.

"Ah, Shego," said Kim once again. This time there was a poke in the back.

Shego turned to face her pesky girlfriend. She hated being prodded. She about to blast the redhead when she realized Kim was pointing at the motion activated monitor that had turned on for the first time that night. The pair starred as vision of Dr Director's bedroom came streaming through the monitor. Shego tried to orientate herself with what she was seeing. "Oooh... Betty's boudoir. Finally seeing inside the evil dragon's den!"

"Shego, why are you acting all surprised? Weren't you in Betty's apartment earlier to place the fly-on-the-wall cams? Or did they place themselves because from where I'm sitting I'd say it was the latter, Oh Great Thief," said the teen genuflecting before the green skinned beauty.

The older woman growled at the hero. She hated her professionalism being questioned even by her girlfriend, so she turned it back onto the teen. "Well yes, but I was in too much of a hurry to look around. I did what I had to do and got out. I didn't know how much time your lying would get us. You suck at lying, Princess."

Kim's face reddened furiously. "I do not!"

Shego reached forward so their faces were almost touching. She pinched a flushed cheek before whispering in Kim's ear, "Oh yes you do, my love. Your body betrays you every single time."

"Get over yourself, Shego," said Kim pushing the older woman back. "We have a job to do." The pair went back to monitoring the vision streaming from Dr Director's bedroom in silence.

When Shego initially went into the apartment to plant the devices, she did not allow herself the luxury of taking in the details. Secretly, she was anxious about the kind of security the head of a global spy agency would have installed for unwelcome visitors and she just wanted to get in and out as quickly as possible without detection. Now with the pressure off her, she could take in the surroundings. The room was not how Shego envisioned for Betty. Psych wards had more personality.

The bedroom was minimally decorated in tones of whites and creams. There were no wall hangings, photographs, books, clothes, jewellery or any other features that stamped one's personality on a room. There was a large white wrought iron framed, king sized bed in the centre of the room, set between two cream colored bedside tables with matching plain looking lamps that would have looked at home in a mediocre motel room.

Shego looked closely at the large bed. It was made too perfectly. There was not even a single crease on it. The bedding was very plain and functional. "Wow, styling. Talk about a military corner. All it is missing is the Smackeroo, bouncing off the bed," said the green woman. "I wonder what Will is doing tonight." Her girlfriend giggled in response.

The one eyed woman walked into full view of the fly-on-the-wall cam, her face was barely visible. She was barefoot and was wearing a thick blue terrycloth robe. Definitely not Global Justice issued thought the former villainess. Her hair appeared to be wet and slicked back. In her hands was a large SLR camera on a tripod that was extended to about four feet.

Betty Director positioned the tripod in front of the bed, the camera was pointing to the head of the wrought iron bed. She leaned down to look through the camera lens. The sight of Betty's posterior taking up so much of the monitor, made Shego shudder. She adjusted the zoom on the camera to take in more of the bedroom. Shego watched as Betty played with the settings on the lens. The Global Justice chief then slightly shifted her head to the right and repeated the process of looking into aperture.

For a moment Shego couldn't work out what was wrong with that picture, no pun intended. Then it dawned on her. The green skinned beauty looked at her girlfriend wanting to get confirmation that her eyes had not deceived her and that her lover had seen the same thing. The way that Kim was pointing at the monitor confirmed that she had.

"Oh my, God! Shego, did you see that? Betty used her dud eye!" Kim sounded incredulous. "Oh my, God, Shego, I simply can't believe it! What a liar! Why would she wear that thing for so many years? It's totally ugly, butch and it ages her way beyond her years."

Shego snorted in a most unladylike manner. Kimmie's comments were spot on. This was brilliant. For years she had thought there was more to the head of the law enforcement agency than met the eye, so to speak, and here finally was the proof. And she was supposed to be the untrustworthy one. Now how could she explain the situation to her stunned and naive girlfriend?

"It's the old power patch trick, Kimmie," said Shego hoping she was sounding as if she knew what she was talking about. The redhead's raised eyebrow suggested she was not getting away with it. "My guess is that she might have needed it originally for an eye infection and found that she got more of a reaction and respect from her colleagues wearing it. I mean, who is going to say no to a lady with a patch? Actually referring to her as a lady is pushing it. Think about it, Princess, its instant street cred."

"I'm so very disappointed in her. That's just so deceitful." Shego didn't dare point out that what the pair was doing was exactly that and it was a case of people in glasshouses, and all that. "I'm shocked you're shocked. She's no Mother Teresa. Even Mother Teresa couldn't be Mother Teresa all the time. Betty runs an intelligence agency. Clandestineis her middle name. What did you expect from her?"

"None of this, that's for sure." Kim gestured to the rented apartment they were in, then Betty's apartment across the street and then to her own eyes. "Hey, why are you even standing up for her?"

Kimmie had a point. Shego felt dirty. She shuddered. "Princess, if you do these stakeouts often enough, you realize it goes the territory. Now this is sure beats, 'It's Hard to Be Humble'. Relax. Let's see if anything juicier pops up. My gut feeling says something will."

"I can't see how," mumbled Kim. Way to go in aiming high, Princess, thought Shego.

The pair watched Dr Director turn her head towards the door. She appeared to be saying something to the ninja who was still out of shot. The camera angle was not conducive to lip-reading.

"Does thing have audio?" The question was simple enough but Shego knew that Princess was once again having a subtle pot shot at her skills of break and entering and her professional pride was wounded. In Shego's opinion the redhead had had it easy in her career as a hero. She was too used to her nerdy Nerdlinger doing all the work for her.

"Kiss, kiss, I love you too, Kimmie." In response Shego was thrown a questioning look, a perfectly shaped eyebrow raised in response. "Yes there is audio on the monitor, just turn that dial up." The teen did as she was instructed. The voices from the bedroom across the street broadcast clearly into the rented apartment. Shego and Kim eagerly leaned in closer for better clarity.

''... And Yori, be a dear, bring the bag in with you," called out the Global Justice head.

"Hai, Betty-chan," was the faint reply from the Japanese ninja.

Yori entered the bedroom carrying the large dark colored canvas duffle bag. The bag concealed most of the slim torso behind it. Shego could not make out what young woman was wearing. She was certainly not dressed in what Shego associated with a ninja. She was definitely not clad from head to toe in a black shinobi shōzoku. Gone was the overcoat that Kimmie had reported earlier. The Japanese woman seemed not to be wearing much at all, her limbs were exposed and she too was barefoot. Betty walked over and relieved the Japanese woman of the bag and placed it on the floor. Without a word, Yori made her way to the bed and lay down gracefully.

Kim clutched the green woman's arm, her fingernails digging in sharply. "Shego! Look what she's wearing."

Shego could not take her eyes off the young ninja. Man, did she look hot. The black and purple sheer bra and panties were put to full effect. The Asian woman sure knew how to pose on a bed. For a moment Shego debated whether she should say that directly to her young lover. What the hell she thought. It shouldn't matter where she got her appetite from, as long as she came home for dinner with her girlfriend.

"Oh believe me, Princess, I am, I am. I love the lingerie. It's classy, sexy but not in the dirty old man sleazy, sexy. Why can't you wear something like that? I mean, I like you in your boy shorts and sports bra, but that is va-va-voom!" said the older woman appreciatively. She was almost purring. "It would totally make my motor run."

Shego was rewarded with a swift and vicious punch to the arm for her honesty. "Ah, that hurt. What the hell was that for Pumpkin?" she demanded.

"That's for being a jerk!" replied Kim.

Shego could see the hurt in her girlfriend's face. Maybe it wasn't the best idea to compliment the woman who in the past made goo-goo eyes at her girlfriend's ex-boyfriend. Especially when she was trying to encourage said girlfriend to be more adventurous in the bedroom. It wouldn't be doing much for the teen's confidence being compared to another woman.

"Sorry, Kimmie. I didn't mean how that sounded," said Shego apologetically. "When this is over, I'll make up it up to you."

"Lady, I'm going to make sure that you do," replied the teen with a devilish glint. Shego didn't know if she should be worried or excited by that. She was never sure which way Kimmie would take things.

"What do you think they're doing?"

"I don't know. Kimmie, at this point, I know as much as you do. Let's just sit back and see what unfolds." Shego had to admit she was more than curious. Bikini ninja babe made sure of that. Working for Drakken was never this interesting.

Betty Director kneeled down and unzipped the duffle bag. She reached in and pulled out what seemed like a fairly solid, dark brown, plush chimp head. She walked over closer to the bed and handed the mask to the Japanese woman who placed it on her head. The reclining woman proceeded to pose on the bed while the law enforcement officer stood behind the camera, gave a number of suggestions to Yori to how to arrange herself and then took pictures; lots and lots of pictures. The constant whirring sound of the camera contested to that.

After about five minutes, Betty moved from around the tripod and once again reached into the bag on the floor. She pulled out a second furry monkey head. She placed it on the bed. She took off her robe. She was too was clad in racy and sheer black underwear. Unlike Yori, the law enforcer wore a one piece. There was a final check and adjustment of the camera, before Betty Director, head of Global Justice, placed the monkey headpiece over her own face and joined the ninja. The pair rolled around on the bed, their bodies entwined erotically, occasionally rubbing against the other, hands caressing erogenous zones. They also appeared as if they were kissing one another through the fabric. All the while the motor of the digital camera could be heard wheezing as it took its pictures.

"What the frigging heck is going on?" demanded the redhead. Now Princess decides not to swear, thought Shego even though the occasion called for a good cuss, especially with One-Eye just dropping a Bouncing Betty on them.

"I honestly don't know, Kimmie. Maybe they're furries and this is how they greet each other in Furryland. What I do know is that it's no wonder Betty didn't want Will to know what she was up to. This isn't covered in his rulebook. I would imagine it wouldn't even have been a consideration when they wrote the damned thing," replied Shego.

The green woman watched as the pair got off the bed, pulled their monkey heads off and threw them onto the floor. Betty pulled the younger woman close, draping her arm around the ninja's waist. She leaned down to kiss Yori's nape. Together they made their way to the camera to check out their handiwork. They giggled as each picture came into frame. Shego wished the fly-on-the-wall cam could zoom in on the images captured.

"Betty-chan, do you think we can use these? Do you think he will recognize us?" asked the ninja.

The law enforcer grinned, the smile reaching her eyes, both eyes. Shego thought it looked creepy. "They're perfect and if they're not, we could always touch them up. We have the technology." If Betty was trying to be hip and funny quoting pop culture, she was failing miserably, thought Shego. Yori's giggle indicated otherwise.

"Stoppable will not know what hit him. Monkey Master my ass. For four seasons he was the bumbling idiot with his pants down. He has followed Possible around the world on her heroic missions like an ineffectual puppy dog; and then in one instant he gets his stuff together and he's suddenly the hero of the world and God's gift to women. The man is still afraid of his own shadow and monkeys for crying out loud."

"My fellow female ninjas try and avoid him at mealtimes. He seems to think a communal meal is an invitation for more and then there is the 'Let me give you an up close and personal demonstration of my Monkey power in my private room' routine. To date not one of the females at the school has taken him up on his offer. They may be students but they are not silly.

"I'm surprised Sensei has not said anything to him about his unbecoming behaviour. Sensei just laughs at Stoppable-san for being a cheap man and for his love of the coupon book and children's menu." The law enforcer laughed. There was coldness to it.

"When Stoppable sees these, he won't know whether to be terrified or to run to the men's room. That will teach him for messing with you. He had his chance and now that boat has long sailed," said Betty, her arm tightened as she brought the ninja close.

"Betty-chan, what if he does not get it? He is not exactly the most sensitive of men," commented the Japanese woman.

"Babe, we will keep threatening him with creative messages, photos, videos and even public humiliation until it dawns on him that his little Ron is no longer a welcome factor to the women around him."

Yori giggled as she reached up to cup Betty's face, pulling it forward. She was then passionately kissing the older woman. Betty reached around and grabbed a toned buttock with one hand and unhooked the ninja's bra with the other.

Shego howled with laughter. After tonight not only would her pardon no longer be conditional, she could blackmail the law enforcer for a very, very long time to come. No more of Will Du's inane punishments either for her. If she played her cards right, after tonight she would have Betty and that dipshit Du doing whatever she wanted.

The other thought she had was that perhaps the turn of events could remove the rose colored glasses that Kimmie wore and she would finally see Stoppable in a completely new way, the way Shego saw him, as a buffoon.

"Shego, this isn't funny. That's my best friend they're talking about," said Kim defensively. Why was Princess even still defending the jerk? What else did she need, thought Shego?

"Yeah, you're right. It's not funny. It's pure gold! In your face, Stoppable!" She continued laughing as her girlfriend punched her hard in the arm.

"Shego, we have to warn him. They're making a total fool out of him. You don't know what else they plan to do with the photographs."

"Why do we have to say anything? He sounds like he's continued being a jerk after he ditched you and he so deserves it. Besides, when was the last time you saw the guy? Has he called you? Has he told you where he is or what he's doing? You had to hear it from the ninja chick by accident."

Kim growled at her girlfriend. Shego could tell Kimmie was about to blow a gasket. "I repeat, that's my best friend we are talking about. It would be the right thing to do to tell him."

"Alright, alright, but do we have to do it straight away? Why can't we all get some mileage out of this? It sounds like we all have our reasons to get our own back with Stoppable." As far as Shego was concerned, Monkey Boy deserved Betty's cruel and unusual punishment and then some.

The teen seemed to be considering her girlfriend's suggestion. After a while she replied. "I'll talk to Ron, but I guess it doesn't have to be right this instance. If you think about it, I don't actually know where he is exactly," Kim said with a sly smile.

Oh yeah, thought Shego, Kimmie would be littering in public sooner rather than later.

"So we can sit back and watch the show now?" asked the former villainess. She was dying to see Betty in action.

"Definitely. You might learn a thing or two," the redhead quipped. Oh, Kimmie was going to pay for that one, thought the green woman.

Shego sat down in the chair, trying to make herself comfortable. She wondered if she could steal some popcorn from one of the neighbours. The former villainess decided to pass for now. Maybe she would get some for next time, when they unveiled the special, unrated, limited edition, 'Betty is my bitch and girl Friday', version.

A/N: I don't actually think Ron is a jerk but for the purposes of this story, I needed him to be an uber one to make my point.

Sorry, this took so long to post. Even though this was written months, and months ago, I lost interest in FF. Readers; a few words of encouragement can go a very long way.