A/N: Ugh I love this pairing, but they're ruining my life. Hopefully this isn't too OOC. I'm sorry if it is. T-T
"Leave me alone, god damn it!"
"Watch yourself, Dean. Remember who you're talking to."
"Yeah. A freakin' holy-roller who comes and goes as he pleases."
Castiel sighed, tilting his head and studying Dean. The latter was currently pacing back and forth in a dilapidated house. There were streams of dusty evening light coming through the wooden slats over the windows. On the floor between the two men was a dried bloodstain that had been there for quite some time.
"Look at yourself, Dean, before you start calling other people names." Castiel folded his arms and leaned against the wall, smirking.
"Why are you even here, huh?! You get some kinda sick satisfaction from watching me struggle?" Dean threw his arms out, exasperated.
Castiel held his hands up.
"I'm just here to help." He said innocently.
"Yeah, like hell you are." Dean scoffed.
"Hell, you say?" That damn smirk was back.
Dean glared at Castiel, taking several steps towards him and raising a fist, as if to hit him.
"Found it." Sam poked his head around the corner, disappearing just as quickly.
Dean muscled past Castiel, making a noise of annoyance. The three of them congregated in the desolate front yard, gathering around the Impala. Sam threw a small brown bag onto the hood. Several small herbs spilled out.
"So we've got a weapon, more or less. Now all we need is a killer and a motive." Sam said, looking at Dean then Castiel in turn.
Castiel nodded, but he was focused on something else. Dean was leaning on his forearms, talking to Sam. His t-shirt was tight and there were little damp patches from where he had been sweating. Castle could see part of the scar on Deans arm. The perfectly formed hand print.
I'm the one that gripped you tight and raised you from perdition.
Castles eyes roamed further. He watched Deans muscles flex as he adjusted slightly. The definition of his biceps was mesmerizing.
"Isn't that right, Cas, old pal?" Dean pat Castiels back just a bit too hard. It stung.
"I suppose so." Castiel nodded.
The troupe climbed into the hot car and began the long drive to town, heading for the local library. Almost immediately, Dean turned on the radio, tuning into a station and singing along to the song.
"So this ain't the end. I saw you again today!" Dean sang, bouncing in the passengers seat. "Smiled like the sun, kisses for everyone! And tales, it never fails!"
Castiel bit his tongue to avoid smiling. These Winchester boys were something else.
"Take it, Sammy!" Dean pointed to Sam, head banging.
"Now wouldn't ya? Barracudaaaa." Sam sang slightly off-key, drumming a beat on the steering wheel.
And so the car ride continued. Every time Dean found another song to sing it became harder and harder for Cas to keep his composure. By the end of the car ride, it was all he could do not to grin like an idiot.
"Here we are." Dean pointed to the looming building in front of them. It was nothing more than a silhouette in the setting sun.
"For a ghost town this place sure has a huge library."
"Think they're compensating?" Dean grinned, climbing out of the car (quite literally).
Inside the library, the men took a second to enjoy the air conditioning before they came up with a plan.
"Alright. Dean, you and Cas see what family history you can dig up. See if there were any violent deaths, crimes, anything like that. You know the drill. Castiel, keep an eye on him. I'm gonna go see if anything's come up recently in the papers." Sam nodded, giving the other two a light push towards the center of the room.
"Hello." A female receptionist, late-twenties, with a shirt that was cut just a bit too low, sat behind a large desk.
"Hello." Castiel nodded.
"Hey." Dean leaned against the counter, giving the woman his signature half-smile.
"Can I help you find something today?" the woman tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, smiling.
Cas nudged Dean, trying to hurry him along.
"Why, yes you can, Katy." Dean cut Castiel off, leaning in and reading the receptionists name tag. "We're actually journalists from a few towns over, doing a story on the Lindsey family murder case. You wouldn't happen to know anything, would you?"
Castiel rolled his eyes, silently praying for patience. He glanced over and watched as the girl handed Dean a card with her number on it. Dean smirked, mouthing the words 'thank you' and winking at the girl as he walked away.
"Come along, journalist pal."
"Lying's a sin, Dean." Castiel whispered, nudging Dean in the ribs.
"Yeah, so is ignoring the perfect opportunity to score some digits, Cas."
At the back of the library, Dean and Castiel hauled book after book over to an empty table, staking them messily.
"Let's get started. You get this one, I'll do that one. Remember, we're looking for anything on the Lindsey family." Dean slid a book over to Castiel.
They flipped through page after page of old news stories, letters, articles, etc. They book marked every page with the word 'Lindsey' on it. After several minutes of silence, Cas glanced over, checking on Deans progress. Dean was in the middle of writing something, his eyes darting from the book to his notebook. His tongue darted out to wet his plush lips briefly as he continued scrawling a note.
To his embarrassment, Castiels stomach growled loudly,
Dean looked up.
"Hungry?" He smiled.
"A bit. But it's fine. I'll just—"
"I saw a McDonalds a few miles back. C'mon." Dean began putting books away, patting Castiels shoulder quickly.
"What about Sam?" Castiel asked, lifting a particularly heavy book and passing it to Dean.
"Pshh! That old bookworm won't even know we left. We'll be gone twenty minutes, tops." Dean set the last book on the shelf and grabbed his notebook.
Castiel followed him out of the library and into the car, looking over his shoulder every so often to make sure he and Dean weren't being followed. They drove in silence, each consumed with their own thoughts. Dean, thinking of how to catch this killer. Castiel, thinking of the way Dean had wet his lips earlier. He couldn't stop himself. The way Deans tongue glided across his lower lip sent shivers through Castiel.
Lord give me strength.
Cas was so consumed in thought he didn't even notice that they had arrived until he felt a gentle touch brush across his arm. Dean had set a hand on him, giving him a concerned look.
Castiel averted his eyes and opened his door, letting out a hushed 'I'm fine.'
McDonalds was crowded and noisy, since it was almost dinnertime. Dean held onto Castiels sleeve, pulling him through the crowd of people. Castiel couldn't help but smile at the nearly maternal look on Deans face.
"Order anything you want. I'm buying." Dean beamed broadly.
Castiel smiled back, more amused with Dean than with eating. He was terribly hungry though, so he settled on a standard meal. Dean ordered his meal and they sat at a booth in the corner, away from the crowd.
"Man, do you know how long it's been since I've had McDonalds?" Dean sighed.
"About twenty-four hours." Dean chuckled. "If I keep this up I'll start getting fat and ugly."
"No you won't, Dean. I have faith in you." Castiel reached out to touch Deans arm but changed his mind at the last second and simply set his arms across the table.
"There you go with that faith crap again. Look, I'm not a big fan of all that holy-of-holies stuff." Dean said tensely, shaking his head.
"I just meant, I don't think you could ever be ugly, Dean. You're quite handsome."
There was an awkward silence.
"You're vanity will keep your weight under 200." Castiel added quickly, smirking.
"Well uh… Thanks, Cas…." Dean cleared his throat. "I'm gonna go get a refill." Dean shook his half-full cup and left the table
Cas sighed. He was so stupid! He had just made everything between the two of them weird. Why had he called Dean handsome in the first place? It wasn't his place to say such things.
"I hope you're hungry for cheap, greasy by-products, because that's what we ordered." Dean set the tray on the table, giving Castiel that charming smile of his.
The meal was disgusting, but it was made a bit more interesting by Deans running commentary.
"This tastes like plastic. Greasy plastic. Man, I don't even think this cheese is real. Gross."
Dean grabbed a handful of fries and stuffed them in his mouth. He sighed in satisfaction, shutting his eyes as he chewed noisily. Castiel smiled to himself.
So this was the man that was driving him to sin? Yeah, he wanted Dean. In the worst way possible. Oh lord, did he want him. And he felt awful about it, but he really couldn't stop. No matter how hard he prayed or tried to ignore him, Dean would always worm his way into Castiels thoughts.
"Dean?" Castiel whispered, not entirely sure why he was doing so.
"What's up, buddy?"
"How do you ignore something that's tempting you?"
Dean looked up from his meal and locked eyes with Castiel.
"Well I suppose you avoid it. You stay away so it can't tempt you anymore." Dean said, scratching his chin.
Castiel nodded. He didn't want to stay away from Dean. He couldn't. He needed Dean as much as Dean needed him (much as Dean hated to admit it.)
"It's not that simple." Castiel muttered.
"Is it ever that simple?"
Dean laughed aloud, but stopped when he saw the look on Castiels face.
"Why do you ask?" Deans voice was tinged with curiosity.
Castiel shook his head and took a sip of his drink, looking out the window.
"I'm having feelings for someone and I shouldn't be. I just feel… wrong, Dean."
Dean sighed. He smiled and chuckled at how human Castiel could be.
"So who is this mystery gal?" Deans cheeks were bulging with fries.
Castiel sucked in a breath. He could feel the heat prickling up his neck.
"It's uh…. It's not a woman. It's- it's a man." His face was burning as he avoided eye contact with Dean.
"Oh. Uh… Okay…. Well, I guess— I mean… that changes things." Dean bit his lip briefly. "So um…. Who's the uh… lucky fella then…?"
By now they were both blushing profusely. They occupied themselves with their dinner, neither of them wanting to break what little balance and harmony they had left.
"Is it another angel?" Dean pried.
Castiel shook his head, swirling a fry in his ketchup.
Castiel nodded almost unnoticeably.
Dean leaned back in his seat. He gazed at Cas over clasped hands. He tilted his head and looked Castiel over, much to Castiels discomfort. Finally a look of realization came over Deans face.
"Me? You have feelings for… for me?" Dean raised his eyebrows, shocked.
Castiel shut his eyes and nodded, blushing an even deeper shade of red. He wanted to disappear but he couldn't bring himself to do it. He had dug his grave. Now it was time to lay in it.
Dean cleared his throat. He didn't know what to say. He simply looked around the room. Everyone else was jovial, oblivious, carefree. They were simply here eating their burgers, unaware of anything else.
"Let's uh… Let's get back to Sam." Dean said softly, grabbing their tray and climbing out of the booth.
In the car there was silence. Tense, awkward silence. Dean gripped the wheel just a little too tight. The muscle in his jaw twitched as he processed everything. As they parked in front of the library, Dean broke the silence.
"Cas, I'm really flattered. I mean, anyone would be lucky to have someone like you. You're an amazing guy. But I don't exactly uh… play for that team. I'll support you 100%, though, whatever you do. Okay?"
Castiel nodded stiffly, looking out the window. He heard the car door open, heard Dean get out, heard the door close. He watched Dean walk up the steps, running his fingers through his hair. So much for balance and harmony.
"Where were you? I tried calling." Sam crossed his arms.
Dean shook his head.
"Let's just work on this stuff." Dean grabbed a newspaper, not really reading what it said.
"Where's Castiel? Dean?" Sam pulled the paper away from his brother.
"We went to grab a bite to eat. Sam he… he told me something." Dean fell into a chair and sighed.
Sams brow furrowed. Dean was acting odd. He was also blushing slightly. What could be so embarrassing that it made Dean blush? Dean hardly ever got embarrassed.
Sam sat across from his brother, nudging him with his foot.
"What'd he tell you?"
Dean looked up, catching Sams gaze.
"He has feelings for me, Sammy. An angel has feelings for me." Dean whispered harshly.
Sam bit his tongue. He shut his eyes and looked away from Dean. He tried his hardest not to laugh. He shouldn't be laughing. This was a serious matter. But god, Dean looked so out of sorts, it was such an odd sight. And the fact that Castiel, an angel, had feelings for someone, a man no less, was almost unheard of.
They sat in silence for several minutes, each deep in thought.
"So… Do you like him back?" Sam fought to keep the laughter out of his voice.
"Dude come on! I'm not gay, man. That's just— just—"
"Dean." Sam raised his eyebrows.
"Okay fine. So I'm curious. So what? It's not like I'm gonna go prancing around in a skirt or anyth—"
"And I will? I'm not really the skirt-wearing type, mister Winchester." Castiels cool voice made Dean jump slightly.
Sam made a small noise, something like a strangled laugh. He turned away and began putting books on the shelves.
Dean sighed again. He shut his eyes tight and pinched the bridge of his nose, exhaling slowly.
"You could get in trouble, Cas. Lust is one of the Seven Deadly Sins, right? And being gay on top of that…. You could be in some serious shit, dude."
Castiel smiled. He shook his head and gave Dean an almost pitying look.
"I'm already in trouble. My superiors aren't as… trusting of me as they once were. They think my faith is faltering."
Dean sat back in his chair and looked at Castiel. What if he got caught? What if his superiors found out? Castiel would be exiled, or worse. And then where would they be? He had been such an amazing help lately. They had solved more cases with his help in the past three weeks than they could in three months. Without Castiel they would be back at square one.
There was a small rush of wind and when Dean looked up Castiel had vanished.
Sam put a hand on Deans shoulder, silently letting him know they were in this together.
"You look tired." Sam said sympathetically.
Dean nodded and forced a smile.
"What do you say we head back to the motel, huh?" he jumped up and jingled his keys.
"I'm telling you, man, there's something weird going on with this case. The Lindseys were well liked, didn't have any family tragedies, and no one seemed to notice anything strange about them in the weeks before their deaths." Sam sighed, leaning against the hood of the car.
"Let's go to the police station later. Check out the evidence." Dean shrugged.
They were met in their motel room by Castiel. He was sitting on one of the beds, staring at a stain on the rug. He looked up when the other two entered, but immediately looked away once more.
Sam nudged Dean, giving him a look. Dean shook his head, elbowing Sam in the ribs.
'Talk to him.' Sam mouthed.
'NO.' Dean mouthed back.
They silently fought, nudging and elbowing each other, glaring. Sam stomped on Deans foot.
"Ow! Son of a bitch!"
"I'm going out for a while. Call if you need anything." Sam gave Dean one last look and left the room, shutting the door.
Dean shoved his hands in his pockets. He surveyed the room, jingled the coins in his pocket, shifted his weight from foot to foot. He felt out of place, awkward. Castiel, on the other hand, looked totally lost in thought. He had his head bowed and his fingertips pressed together. There was an air of concentration permeating from his corner of the room.
"You said you were curious, Dean. I'm curious too." Castiel wore a sheepish smile.
Dean blinked several times before he understood what Castiel meant. He sighed softly and sat on the other bed in the room, adjacent to the angel.
"Cas… I don't… I mean, I don't know if that would be such a good idea, you know? Like I said earlier, you could get in trouble."
"Maybe I want to get in trouble, Dean! Maybe I'm tired of following orders. I've been given orders for as long as I can remember. I'm tired of being someones bitch all the time!" Castiels sharp tone took Dean by surprise.
Deans shock must have shown on his face. Castiel sighed and heaved himself off the bed, only to land softly on the other bed, next to Dean.
They sat in silence for what felt like a century. Time ticked by at an agonizing pace.
"You want to get in trouble, Cas? There are other ways to do that. You don't have to—"
"I don't want to do it any other way. I care about you, Dean. I want you to help me do this." Castiels usually collected demeanor was slowly crumbling.
Dean reached out a hesitant hand and placed it on Castiels leg. He bit his lip and looked at Cas, searching his wearied face.
"Man, I can't believe I'm actually going through with this." Dean chuckled, shaking his head. "I must be crazy."
"Crazy has nothing to do with it."
Castiels cool lips brushed Deans cheek softly. His slender fingers trailed across Deans jaw, turning his head.
"Cas… I'm sorry…."
Castiel pulled away.
"What for?" he asked, confused.
Dean chuckled to himself.
"For getting you in trouble, you feathery idiot."
Dean put a hand on the back of Castiels neck and pulled him into a kiss, his warm lips meeting Castiels cool ones. They moved simultaneously, embracing on the bed. Dean climbed on top of the angel and sighed into the kiss. Castiel made a small noise, tilting his chin up. He could feel Dean smiling against him, probably amused at how bad Cas was at kissing. Dean sat back, breaking the kiss and gasping for air.
"I'm sorry. I've never done this with a man before." Castiel said shyly.
"What, and you think I have? I'm just as lost as you are." Dean chuckled.
"I don't want you to feel like you have to do this, Dean." Castiel whispered, leaning back on his elbows.
"I've noticed you looking at me lately, eyeing me when you thought I wouldn't see. You know what? I liked all the attention. I'm just repaying the favor." Dean leaned down and kissed Castiels jaw.
A current of electricity coursed between them. The angel and his human. The lights dimmed briefly as Dean brushed his hips against Castiels.
"Hey now. Careful. Wouldn't want to blow a lightbulb." Dean smirked.
The angel smiled and breathed a soft 'sorry' before kissing Dean again. His hands slid down Deans sides and under his tight shirt, caressing his back, feeling each muscle flex.
Dean kissed Castiels neck and whispered sweet nothings against his skin. His breath was cool, contrasting with Castiels warm skin. The way his lips buzzed against Castiels neck was just enough to make Cas gasp and arch his back.
Dean leaned up and pulled his shirt off, throwing it across the room. The light hit his toned chest just right, making him glow.
"Christ." Castiel gasped.
"Call me Dean." Dean whispered, kissing Castiel softly.
Dean began unbuttoning Castiels shirt, painstakingly, methodically slow. Castiel slipped out of it and threw it near Deans. He was leaner than Dean. His skin was milky white and smooth. Dean kissed down the smooth chest below him, stopping at the hemline of Castiels pants.
"Do you…. Are you… like Uriel?" Dean blushed slightly.
Castiel let out a soft laugh.
"No. I have genitalia, thankfully." Castiel sounded amused.
Dean smiled and undid Castiels pants, pulling them off completely. He looked at the angel, silently asking for permission. Cas nodded, giving Dean a small smile. Dean kissed Castiels toned stomach, pulling his underwear off. He kissed his way further down the lithe form beneath him.
"Eager?" Dean asked, rubbing Castiels thighs.
"Curious." Castiel whispered.
Dean scoffed. He had never done this before. He was always on the receiving end. Nonetheless, he pressed on. He kissed Castiels inner thigh, earning a small gasp from him. Castiels hands instinctively knotted in Deans hair, guiding him. Dean grabbed the hard member in front of him and gave it a tentative lick.
The noise Castiel made was all the encouragement Dean needed. He wrapped his lips around Cas's hard-on and sucked as hard as he could, hollowing out his cheeks. He ran his hands across Castiels body, down his thighs, then back up, repeating the process again and again.
Each movement drew noises of pleasure from Castiel, made him squirm and buck under Dean. His fingers dug into Deans scalp, pulling his hair. Dean pulled Castiel forward, wrapping his arms around the angels thighs. Castiel made sounds he didn't even know he could make, groaning and sighing, whimpering and moaning. Finally, Dean pulled back.
"How was that?" he asked, wiping the corner of his mouth.
Castiel let out a breathless laugh.
"Not bad." He nodded, throwing an arm over his face.
Dean beamed. He climbed back on top of Cas and kissed the area right below his ear.
"My turn…?" Deans voice was low and smooth, making Cas feel things he'd never felt before.
Castiel disappeared, immediately reappearing at the foot of the bed. He began undoing Deans pants with nimble fingers. Dean let his head roll back. The things those fingers could do….
Castiel pulled Deans boxers down, immediately covering his skin with wet kisses.
"Cas, slow down. There's no rush." Dean tilted Castiels chin up.
They shared a brief kiss before Castiel went back to work, sucking and licking Deans member. He tried to mimic what Dean had done, dragging his tongue across every inch of skin he could reach. Dean was making small noises of encouragement, gripping the bedsheets tightly.
"Mmm yeah…. Yeah, right there…."
After several minutes, Castiel pulled away. He kissed his way up Deans chest, stopping at his collarbones. Dean looked at him with lustful eyes, panting quietly.
"So um….. Who…. I mean….. How do we… you know…." Castiel blushed.
Dean grinned and pulled Castiel down, climbing on top of him so their positions were reversed. He knew what to do. He wasn't sure how he knew, but he did. He brought two fingers to the angels delicate mouth and commanded him to suck. He used his other hand and teased Castiels nipples, occasionally leaning down to bite them softly.
Once Deans fingers were well coated in saliva he moved lower on Castiels body, kissing the expanse of skin below his navel before slowly pushing a single digit into Castiel.
He scissored Cas and stretched him, not wanting to hurt him, even as he added a second finger. Castiel had remained silent throughout all of this, simply gripping the sheets and biting his lip. He knew it would hurt, but this is what he wanted. This is who he wanted it with.
"Ready?" Dean pulled his fingers out.
"I think so. Yes." Castiel smiled nervously.
It hurt. It hurt it hurt it hurt. Castiel whimpered and arched his back, digging his nails into the sheets. Dean tried to go slow, rubbing Castiels legs and hushing him quietly.
"It's okay, Cas. It's okay. Shh." Dean whispered, still pushing into Castiel, past the tight ring of muscle.
Once he was completely engulfed, Dean stilled. He wanted to pound Castiel into the mattress, to take him hard and fast and without mercy, driving into him again and again. But instead he tapped his fingers against Castiels leg and leaned down, kissing Castiels jaw, as he waited for him to adjust.
Castiels hands found Deans shoulders, his nails bit into Deans skin.
"Go." he whispered.
Dean began moving, slowly, inside the angel. He picked up speed, thrusting faster and harder, grabbing Castiels legs and tossing his head back. Castiel was gasping and moaning under Dean, no longer trying to stay quiet. His toes curled and his back arched sharply when Dean hit the small bundle of nerves inside him.
"D-Dean!" Castiel panted, unable to form any other words.
Dean bent down and kissed Castiel messily, grunting and panting just as much. Their skin was slick with sweat as they moved in unison, each meeting the others thrusts with rough force. Dean pulled Castiel up so the angel was sitting in his lap. They shared a searing kiss, oblivious to everything except their raw need. It was a moment of perfection, but that moment was cut short by a familiar voice.
"Oh my god, Dean I said talk to him, not sleep with him! Jesus Christ!" Sam shouted, standing in the doorway and looking well beyond disgusted.
"H-hi Sam." Castiel panted, wiping a strand of hair from his forehead as his face turned a deep shade of red.
"Sammy! Gimme half an hour." Dean waved his brother away.
Sam groaned and grabbed something from the table before making his quick exit, slamming the door behind him.
Dean looked at Castiel. Castiel looked at Dean. Then they fell apart, laughing loudly as they picked up where they had left off. Dean smiled as he kissed Castiel once more, pushing him against the wall and gripping him tightly, as if he'd float away.
"I guess that's one way to come out…" Dean chuckled.
Castiel laughed and nuzzled Deans neck, wrapping his arms around Deans muscled torso. He was close. They both were. Dean could feel Castiel tightening around him, getting closer and closer to his impending orgasm, dragging Dean along for the ride.
"Dean I— I—"
"I know, baby. M-me too." Dean gasped, thrusting harder and harder into the angel.
They lost all sense of rhythm, simply rutting against each other, trying to gain release. Dean was the first to go. He groaned loudly and pulled out of Castiel, spilling his load across Castiels stomach.
Castiel looked almost surprised, but quickly recovered as he reached down and stroked himself, locking eyes with Dean and purring softly.
Dean had a moment of clarity, suddenly noticing everything. He blinked and took in the sight before him. Castiel, an angel, was sprawled beneath him, pleasuring himself. Dean had just had sex with an angel. A very attractive angel, at that. He was beautiful. Even when he was exposed, at his weakest, Castiel still managed to give off an air of nobility.
"Kiss me again…" Castiel whispered, shifting under Dean.
Their lips melted together as Dean slid his hand down Castiels stomach, two fingers finding their way back inside him.
Castiel moaned loudly, making the lights flicker continuously now. He bucked and pushed against Dean, still stroking himself. In a matter of seconds he came, arching his back and drawing his legs in, locking them around Dean. There was a brilliant flash then every lightbulb in the room exploded, covering the floor with finite pieces of glass. Castiel lay, whimpering weakly, on sheets soaked with sweat, smiling up at the man who had turned him bad.
"You blew the lights." Dean chuckled.
"I know…. I'm sorry." Castiel said, gulping huge lungfuls of air.
Dean laughed and kissed Castiel. He lay next to Cas and pulled the sheets up, too tired to do anything else. Castiel pulled Dean onto his warm chest, wrapping an arm around him. Dean threw his leg across the angels own, lacing their fingers together.
"Shouldn't you be worrying about an archangel or something? I mean, you just broke like, fifty rules." Dean mumbled.
"Shouldn't you be worrying about Sam?" Castiel shut his eyes and shifted into a more comfortable position.
"Shut up." Dean grumbled.
It didn't take long before Castiel could hear Dean snoring softly. The angel ran his fingers through Deans gelled hair, relishing the feeling of skin against skin. There was a light tap on the door before Sam walked in. He surveyed the room; the broken lightbulbs, the discarded clothes, and Dean, asleep in Castiels arms. Realizing Castiel was still awake, Sam raised a hand in greeting. Castiel nodded in return.
"So you and Dean, huh?" Sam whispered, sitting on the unoccupied bed in the room.
"I guess so. If that's okay." Castiel responded, running his hand through Deans hair once more.
Dean made a small noise, shifting a bit.
"Shh. Go back to sleep." Castiel whispered.
Sam smiled to himself. The way these two got on… One day, they hated each other; the next, they were asleep in each others arms. He nodded in the darkness and grabbed his bag.
"I'll stay in the car tonight." he said quietly, standing to go.
"Thank you, Sam." Castiel whispered.
Sam nodded again and left, shutting the door softly.
"Shit….." Dean whispered, trailing his hand down Castiels chest.
"Hmm?" Castiel ran his fingers across Deans jaw.
"I was kinda hoping last night was a dream. I mean, it was good and all, but I'm confused as hell right now." Dean sighed gruffly.
"You're confused, Dean? You're not an angel of the lord. You're not a host of heaven, a true follower of Gods word. You're not confused, Dean. I am." Castiels voice was sharp, in contrast with his gentle touch.
Dean sighed and pulled himself into a sitting position. He saw his and Castiels clothes piled on the floor.
"What a night." Dean turned to face Castiel, smiling broadly.
"Guys?" Sam knocked on the door, opening it just a bit.
"Hey Sam. How was the car?" Dean asked, noting the dark circles under Sams eyes.
Sam shook his head. He held up a brown paper bag with little grease spots on it.
"The most important meal of the day." Dean beamed, grabbing his clothes from the floor and pulling them on.
Sam gave him an odd look.
"Someone's in a good mood today." he chuckled
Dean rolled his eyes and gestured to a preoccupied Castiel. He raised his eyebrows and nodded wisely.
"Oh gross, Dean. I mean, I'm happy for you two, but I'm scarred for life after what I saw last night. Just don't make that a nightly habit, okay?" Sam bit into his greasy sandwich.
"I'm sorry you had to see that, Sam." Castiel said softly.
He was still sitting in bed. He hadn't slept at all last night, and was slowly but surely getting up. He climbed out of bed and began getting dressed. He buckled his belt and walked over to the table completely topless, and was now eating a greasy sandwich, biting into it and sighing.
"Uh Cas? Shouldn't you be wearing a shirt?" Sam averted his eyes.
Castiel looked down. He had small scratch marks down his stomach and sides. He could only imagine what his back looked like.
"Yes…. Yes I should."
The angel disappeared. He always did that. One minute he was there, having a conversation; the next…
"I was wondering if I might have a word with you in the hall, Dean." Castiel opened the hotel door, having appeared outside the room, making the Winchester boys jump.
Dean looked at Sam, looking for a sign, for something. Sam shrugged, shaking his head. A fat lot of use he was. Dean groaned and stretched, slowly making his way to the hallway. Once he was out of the room he was met by his angel, wearing a shirt that was buttoned crooked.
"Hello, Dean." Castiel spoke quietly.
"Mornin'." Dean raised a hand, squinting into the bright light that was coming from a window behind Cas.
"About last night… I understand if you don't want to do this anymore. We can just forget about it and never speak of it again, if you wish." Castiel hung his head, looking far too much like a scolded puppy.
Dean leaned against the wall, sighing heavily. There were water stains on the ceiling, and the paint on the walls needed some touching up. This was where Dean lived, dilapidated motels, grungy buildings, anywhere with a bed, really. Every day he woke up and he wished he could go back to his house in Lawrence, where his mom would be alive, waiting to make him a glass of lemonade, and ask him to help her with yard work. That life would never happen. That life was only a dream.
"Dean?" Castiel whispered softly.
"I've never really had a real relationship. Not for a long time…." Dean mused.
He scratched his cheek and continued.
"Hell, no one would have me. I've always been 'Dean, the hunter'. Never 'Dean, the guy who's good at cooking and likes watching old black and white movies on his days off'. But when I'm with you, Cas….." here Dean sighed, pushing away from the wall and pacing. "When I'm with you… I want to be that guy. I want to be something better than just 'Dean, the hunter'….. and I want to do it with you."
Dean chuckled under his breath, wiping away the angry tears that had formed in his eyes. He felt as though a weight had been lifted off his chest.
"I'd like that, Dean." Castiel whispered, appearing directly in front of Dean.
Dean beamed. He let out a breath he didn't know he'd been holding and grabbed Castiels face, pulling him into a kiss right in the middle of the hallway. Cas made a surprised noise, then relaxed and kissed back, putting his hands on Deans hips.
They broke apart, forehead to forehead, and simply stood there relishing the others company.
Sams voice made them jump apart.
"Sorry?" Dean grabbed Castiels hand, tapping it with his fingertips.
"That's how it happened. The girl, whatever her name was. Apparently she had been talking to the school counselor about some pretty dark things. I don't know why we didn't think of it before."
Dean glanced at Cas. He looked down at their interlaced fingers, thinking.
"Could you check?" Dean asked in a hushed voice.
Castiels fingers were no longer between Deans own. He had already disappeared, gone to heaven to have a look around.
Dean joined his brother outside, leaning against the Impala. They cracked open a couple beers and warmed up in the early morning sun.
"I don't understand." Castiel spoke, his breath ran down Deans neck, nearly making him spill his drink.
"What don't you understand, Cas?" Sam scooted over, making room for the angel to sit on the hood of the car.
"Why would she commit suicide in a way that would kill everyone else too? She killed them all. Why?" Castiels brow furrowed and he stared intently at the ground.
"Sometimes people do things without thinking." Dean wrapped an arm around Cas.
"She summoned a demon. She obviously had to be thinking." Castiel kicked a rock, getting more and more frustrated.
"Maybe she was lonely." Sam spoke up, shrugging.
The three men simply sat in silence, thinking.
"I just don't understand." Cas sighed, rubbing his temples.
Dean grabbed Castiels waist and kissed the side of his head. He hated seeing Cas so stressed. It wasn't like the angel to dwell so much.
"Don't worry about it. We just gotta make sure the demon is gone then it's case closed and we're on our way."
Cas sighed and was gone once more.
"Dammit, Cas." Dean sighed, looking around for the angel. "We're supposed to be a team."
"It's okay. I sent him back to hell." Castiel said, brushing his trenchcoat off.
He disappeared and reappeared at the back of the Impala, sticking Sam and Deans suitcases in the trunk. He looked lost in thought, almost confused. It was a rare look for Cas.
"I guess this is our sign to pack up and go, huh?" Dean asked, downing the last of his drink and smacking his lips.
Castiel simply shut the trunk and climbed into the back seat, crossing his arms tightly. This case was weighing heavy on his mind. Any case involving children seemed to bother him. It was his one weakness, it seemed. To the average person Castiel appeared heartless, callous, cold. But Dean had become quite close to Cas and could see beyond the stony exterior. Castiel was a good guy. Confused and serious, but all together good.
"How about you drive, Sammy. I'm gonna sit with Cas." Dean tossed his keys to Sam.
"Dean. Don't do anything… you know, gross." Sam made a rather obscene gesture with his hands.
Dean winked at his brother and sat next to Cas in the back seat.
Once they were on the road Castiel seemed to relax some. He still remained quiet, lost in his thoughts. Dean wrapped his arms around Cas and held him tight, unused to such a quiet car ride.
"Can we turn on the radio or something?" Dean nudged Sams seat.
Sam punched a dial and the radio came on. There was a talk show host laughing about something. Sam flipped through stations until he found one he liked. A woman was belting a love song, featuring sappy lyrics and terrible harmony. It wasn't perfect, but it was better than silence.
"I should have heard their prayers. I could have saved them." Castiel murmured, leaning into Deans embrace.
"Don't be so hard on yourself, Cas. It's not your fault." Sam offered empty words of comfort, trying to cheer the saddened angel up.
"Damn it." Cas sighed.
Dean was at a loss. What was he supposed to do? How could he comfort his precious angel? Anything he did seemed useless.
"It's the eye of the tiger, it's the thrill of the fight.
"Risin' up to the challenge of our rival," Dean began singing softly. "And the last known survivor stalks his prey in the night
"And he's watchin' us all with the eye of the tiger…."
Dean continued to sing his favorite song, hoping it would make Cas smile. At first Castiel seemed to ignore Dean, but then the corners of his mouth twitched. He looked at Dean, singing slightly off-key, and simply rolled his eyes.
"You're strange, Dean." Cas sighed, smiling and kissing Deans chin,
"Yes, but at least I can cheer you up. My strangeness isn't a complete waste." Dean said, squeezing Cas.
"Wow. I actually preferred the shitty love songs and talk shows." Sam shook his head.
Dean kicked Sams seat, chuckling.
This is the new normal. This is the extraordinary average. Sam, Dean, and Cas; saving people… hunting things….
The family business.