Disclaimers: I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh!, and I made no money whatsoever off of this little story. I did, however, get to use my nifty vanilla-scented ink when I was writing the rough draft.

Author's Notes: I guess this has probably been done before, but oh well. My first YGO fic. Possibly my last.

Yami Yugi's Diary

Day One:

Kid is sleeping. Have decided to keep diary/journal/record of my life. Am so glad to be using ink again.

Now that I'm free to move around again (with aid of unsuspecting mortal boy) have seen just how cramped stupid Millennium Puzzle is.

Suppose I should start at the beginning and explain how/why I was put in Puzzle to begin with. So, will only include my new beginning (i.e. the part where I am freed by naive, but very kind mortal boy, Yugi). Because...it would take too much time to include my real life. Am Pharaoh. History should be included in thousands of scrolls. Somehow doubt it.

Now, am spirit possessing teenage boy.

Wait. Oh crap. Think I'm dead.

Next day:

Can't understand new-age calendars. Therefore, can't put any date on journal entries. Stupid new world.

Had very un-sophisticated moment last night after realizing I'm no longer alive. Woke Yugi's Grandfather with my screams and curses in 'ancient' Egyptian. Ancient? Please. Grandfather Motou looks as if he's standing under Anubis' shadow already. I, however, appear only a few years older than when I last saw myself. Of course, now have spiky multi-colored hair...am paler, as well, but agewise, I'm the same. Have aged very gracefully.

Found it strange that G.M. came to see why I was still up and couldn't see that I was not his grandson. He came to see why Yugi was still up, I mean. Am starting to talk like shrimp.

Suppose he mistook us because of the dim lighting. Surely he is close enough to Yugi to be able to tell the very large differences between mortal child and myself.

Day Three:

Was wrong. Very wrong. No one can tell us apart. Will explain:

I saved Yugi's friend (again), this time from would-be robber. She never asked about the bright light when I came out of Puzzle...or about my slightly deeper voice...or (get this) the fact that I'm a full head taller than the kid!!!

Friends are ignorant. Boy is naive. Definitely not Pharaoh material. Just how did he solve the Puzzle anyway?!! Must have been my wish to get out; telepathically sent him the solution to my little Puzzle. There. Question answered.

However, can't begrudge them too much. After all, thanks to them, did get to use my powers on robber. Note to self: Be nice to Tea tomorrow.

Right then. Still need to fill in from beginning. Was put in golden nearly-impossible-to-solve Millennium Puzzle. Yugi solved it. Must find other Millennium items and destroy evil shadow spirits dwelling in them before dark powers engulf and annihilate all of human kind.

I hate my life.

10 minutes later

Found dictionary. Have also found a new name for my new self. 'Yami' which means 'dark, darkness', etc. Will freak kid out when I tell him I am 'Yami Yugi'. Should tell him during classes.

Next Day:

G.M. has been kidnaped by long haired billionaire. Said billionaire wants Yugi to enter tournament to win G.M. back; apparently has heard Yugi is very good duelist.

Makes me feel homesick. I was at least respected there. It's been my coaching that has made the kid as good as he is! Has he given me any thanks for it? Any thought at all? Noooo. Wish I was still Pharaoh. Could have him beheaded.

However, G.M. was...kind, and I owe Yugi my life, and well, I'm always willing to trounce someone in a game, so will retire for tonight. We leave tomorrow for the tournament.


Feel like a moron. I didn't even mention duel with Kaiba. Seto Kaiba is some big shot dueler/programmer.

Undefeated in his game.

...Until me. I will allow you to bask in my glory for a moment.

Kaiba also tore up G.M.'s prized 'Blue Eyes White Dragon', and he has the only other 3 BEWD cards. He nearly beat me with them, and I had him thinking he'd win, but then I pulled up the final part of Exodia.

Am still the best. But, being the merciful son of Ra that I am, I decided to remove the evil from Kaiba's mind; sort of like throwing the dog a bone. And maybe now the man will find a hobby. Why is evil so obsessive???

Maybe I'm being harsh. After all, Kaiba proved to me that I'm not invisible now. He saw when I took over Yugi and the duel. So.... Kaiba is...okay. Am feeling better now. Think I'll go relive my victory a few more times.

Next Day.

Kids. Friends. Are. Morons. Hate mortals. Hate Weevil. Hate thickheaded friends.

Apparently, my kicking Kaiba's arse has turned a few heads. Am most famous duelist on the boat (Yugi is most famous duelist on the boat, that is...trying to swallow the irony). So some punk got it in his head that Exodia was my only strategy for winning. Decides to stop that strategy from working.

And what does Yugi do? He lets Weevil touch the cards. And then what does Weevil do? Yes. Seemingly, he lacks Kaiba's physical strength, so he didn't even try to tear up Exodia's pieces. He threw them overboard. All 5 cards.

And then as if things aren't bad enough, Joey dives after them.

Now, I know that in my day I could have had a whole army go after the cards, and if I'd wanted, they'd have swum around until they drowned. But...only if I said so. However, they would have gutted Weevil on the deck and fed him to the Nile crocodiles. Would have been a very satisfying night if they had.

But now, I'm many millennia away from my life. And I'm left with 3 Exodia pieces, a very worried Yugi, a sopping wet Joey, and Weevil. Who is still alive.