KissMeDeadlyT-T: I've just decided to start a fic where I can dump all of the RoyEd drabbles I think of that won't ever be developed into a legitimate fic. I ship them so hard and have way too many ideas for them so half of them don't ever get completed or just turn into pointless ramblings. If people read them, I hope you guys enjoy the weird parts of my mind.

I don't know if the rating will stay T, but I'm going to put the rating and title of every drabble at the beginning of each one, so people will know. :)

I don't own FMA.

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Title: Stew

Rating: T for language

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"We're having stew."

"We just had stew two nights ago."

"I don't give a damn. Al and Winry were over two nights ago and we had to share with them. We are making stew. This time for us. Mostly me."

"Ed, I'm going to turn into stew if we have stew anymore this week. I don't want to be stew. You'll eat me."

Ed's left eyebrow twitched and he glared at his lover, who sat behind his wooden desk, pouting at Ed over piles and piles of paperwork. "That is the worst argument for not having stew that I have ever heard in my fucking whole life."

"Eeedd," Roy groaned, his head connecting with the desk. "We can have stew this weekend. Please for my fucking sanity can we not have it tonight?"

"You're the one always bitching that I don't drink enough milk. There's milk in stew. It would be a win-win situation."

"It would be a win for Edward and oh my fucking god why the hell are we eating stew for the third time this week and it's only Thursday for me." Roy let out a long sigh. "Honestly, Ed, you get off on stew more than you get off on sex."

Ed's ears turned red. "Don't turn this into something like that, you damned pervert. I do not get off on stew. I don't have a sexual fetish for stew." His eyes suddenly lit up then, and his forehead creased in thought. "Actually… that sounds interesting…" he murmured thoughtfully. He looked up to see Roy glaring flatly at him. "What?"

"If you even suggest bringing stew into the bedroom I swear I will not have sex with you ever again."

Ed grinned widely. "Like you could last that long with just your hand, Mustang. Please."

Roy just glared obsidian death rays at him. "No stew."

"Oh, come on."

"Holy fuck. Fine. Make your stupid stew." Roy damn near snapped the pen in his right hand in half. "But I suggest you leave before I punch you in the face."

Ed skipped closer instead and planted a short kiss on his cheek, grinning from ear to ear. "You know what," he said thoughtfully, "maybe we should have sandwiches instead."

Roy stared at him with homicidal intent. "Are you being serious right now?"

"One hundred percent, sir," Ed said in a serious voice that didn't match the shit-eating grin on his face.

Letting out a long, frustrated sigh, Roy demanded, "What about stew? You can't just make a big fuss and then—"

"Oh, so you want stew? Jeez, stop sending mixed signals."'

Roy's eyebrow twitched and the only reason he didn't smack Ed upside the head was because it was illegal to hit a subordinate. "Leave."

Ed was very much not leaving, but instead breaching the stressed general's personal space by snickering and pecking him quickly on the mouth. Before Roy could grab ahold of him and possibly make him pay for being an annoying shit by kissing him until he couldn't breathe or something, Ed danced out of his reach, still with that huge grin.

"So, see you at home at seven?"

"Yes. Fine."

"The stew will be on the table~"

"Leave."

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KissMeDeadlyT-T: So yeah. They'll just be pointless things like this. I know they are drabbles, but I'd still love it if people dropped reviews… Mhm. Well, it's up to you, if you got this far. Thanks for reading. c: