It wasn't often that Mycroft brought someone home. He usually only stayed at his flat when he had no obligations and Mycroft Holmes always had obligations. Tonight, however, he found himself in pleasant company and things simply seemed to work out perfectly on his date (as Anthea would call it).

He and his guest were locked at the lips and hips. Each were grinding into one another and making very desperate noises. Mycroft stopped kissing long enough to fish out his keys and unlock his main door.

Once they were moved out of his breezeway the two were pressed against the front door, yet again heatedly making out. Mycroft laced his fingers into his companions hair and toed off his shoes.

That was when he heard a throat clear behind him. Immediately, he broke free of the kiss and turned to face the greatest threat he could think of; His mother.


"Reminds me of when you were seventeen." She acknowledged, taking a sip of her tea.

"What in Heaven's name are you doing here at this hour?"

"I am watching the telly before bed, Myc. How rude of you, you haven't even introduced your guest."

"What do you mean before you go to bed?"

"Don't you remember? The house is being repainted and since your phone has been acting up, I asked Sherly to message you to ask if I could stay. Family bonding is essential after all. He said you agreed, but wouldn't be back until late."

Mycroft was fuming. His phone wasn't acting up at all. He had simply told his mother that so she would stop pestering him with her new found ability to text (which was taught to her by Sherlock, naturally). Telling Sherlock this was a horrid idea. Apparently he was still upset about mother cleaning his apartment.

"Sorry, mother. You startled me is all. It's no problem." Mycroft said, sliding into his perfect diplomatic demeanor.

"Good. Now, you never introduced me to your guest."

Mycroft winced and turned to give a quick "sorry" face to his date.

"Mummy, this is DI Gregory Lestrade. Greg, this is my mother, Martha Holmes."

Lestrade stepped forward and offered his hand to her. "Pleasure to meet you Ma'am."

"A great pleasure. You seem worried that I will care about your sexuality. Rest assured, I don't mind at all. I have known about Mycroft since he was thirteen and looked at our gardener. He was quite smitten-"

"Mother! Please!"

"Oh, Myc. It's alright. I am sure Greg here understands. Tell you what, why don't you two go fetch yourselves a drink and we can discuss things further when you get back. I have a great many questions for you Gregory."

Lestrade followed the older Holmes to the kitchen.

"Damn Sherlock to all Hell! That damn bloody little-"

"Calm down, Mycroft. It's alright. Your Mum seems very nice, it's nice to get the "meet the parents" step out of the way. Some might say the third date is a little early, but I don't really mind."

"How did he find out? How did he know?"

Greg leaned against the counter. "I don't know. He knows we were seeing each other, he made sure to point that out to everyone that would listen. Anderson hasn't looked me in the eyes since the prick. I saw him earlier today and he badgered me for a bit but nothing-"

"That's how he knew. Damn him." Mycroft set his head against his hands.

"Sorry, I think I may be missing something."

"He deduced we'd be going out the little-" Mycroft clenched his fist and took a deep breath.

Mycroft shook his head and straightened up. "You don't need to stay. I understand if you think it's too soon-"

"It isn't. I am happy to meet your mum. I'll just leave earlier than planned and it might be a good idea to postpone-"

"Very right." Greg grabbed a tea tray and set some biscuits on it as he made his way back to the living room.

Mycroft pulled out his phone.

You are a prick. You ruined my evening. ~M

Funny. I'd be more sorry if Mummy didn't send along doctors and therapists.~S

We rarely get the chance to go on a date and you spoiled it. You are a cunt. ~M

Such harsh language. I had just hoped that her arriving would have ruined your evening. To know that she cock-blocked you and Lestrade makes this day complete. ~S

Sod off. I will send her to go through your house again. ~M

She won't because I moved out of her apartment. She wouldn't dare go through John's things. Have a nice night and good luck on that diet! ~S

AN: Thanks for reading! This is the last chapter for a little while. If you want more you can send along ideas or reviews. I would love to hear what people think so please feel free to review!