Twenty Years Later- Reimu's Successor
Chapter 12- All's well that ends with a party
Patricia's Subconscious, an unknown time, presumably while she was unconscious
Patricia Hakurei had briefly disappeared from the real world, and during such time, seemed to have been transported to an entirely different one, one which seemed mostly like a giant version of the Hakurei Shrine interior, albeit with trees and other such plant-life growing within it.
Naturally, the shrine maiden was very aware of her situation- she was undoubtedly dreaming. However, she was having trouble remembering how exactly she ended up asleep... as far as she could remember, the time was not the typical time associated with dormancy for anyone except for the strange, nocturnal youkai of the forest.
Walking through the overgrown, wooden building, she decided that she may as well have fun with whatever strange trip she was having, and so, began to look for people within her dream-scape to talk to.
At the far end of the massive room she was currently in was an entrance to a room which was labelled 'Memory Bank'. Patricia couldn't help but groan at the incredibly obvious signposting, but figured that this was probably the best place to go if she wanted to get her bearings on how on earth she ended up here.
Walking to the doorway of the 'Memory Bank', she soon came to a dead end upon entering the doorway, and so, turned around and re-entered the central room, only to find the plant-infested wooden room had been replaced with a bizarre sort of library, not too dissimilar to the one she had stolen from on behalf of Marisa.
"This is... strange." Patricia somewhat obviously pointed out, "Okay... uh... dream logic... subconscious... person... where are you? Can you help me find some relevant memories? Come on, this is my dream, someone should show up around now..."
Suddenly, as if appearing on request, a gap opened in the floor in front of Patricia, and a surprisingly kind-looking rendition of Yukari Yakumo floated upwards and out of the void. She was sporting a hideously cheerful smile on her face, one which didn't suit her mature-looking face in the slightest.
"Hello, Patricia! I'm your Memory's embodiment!" the image said to Patricia in a sickeningly sweet voice, "What seems to be the problem?"
Patricia smirked to herself, "I would have doubted your authenticity, saying that you may be the real Yukari entering my dreams, but there's no doubt you're a fake. Jeez, do I really subconsciously view her this way?"
"Well, there are a few corrupted memories which were made while you were an infant... the capturing of the memories were incomplete, so I've only been able to study it a little bit, but I'd say that ultimately, you owe Miss Yakumo a lot!" 'Memory' replied, punctuating her sentence with a gratingly girlish giggle, "Perhaps that's why I'm so smiley?"
Patricia sighed to herself, "I never realised I went insane in my dreams... I must really be gone, this dream's so clear... so, do you know what's going on?"
"Hmm, it would seem that some kind of trauma occurred, because recent memory data, just like data from when you were an infant, is corrupted. Usually the only reason for corruption of memories later on in life is due to trauma..." 'Yukari' explained.
"So... you saying I witnessed something traumatic?" Patricia mused, "...well... I remember figuring out that Uncle Jean and Aunty Marisa had... you know, did the nasty and what have you. But I don't think I'd black out from that..."
"Oh no, silly, I meant a physical trauma!" Memory continued, "You know, getting hurt!"
Patricia stopped and thought to herself, "Hmm... well, the last thing I remember, I was preparing for a fight with Aunty Marisa, and then that Dawitsu loser came in, we started fighting, and... oh, I get it..."
"You do?" Memory asked, and got out a book labelled 'Short Term Memory', "What happened?"
"I think... I think I actually lost a fight!" Patricia said, her voice actually happy with this result, for whatever reason, "Oh yeah! That's it, I told them not to go easy on me, and then, at the end, I got hit! Aunty Marisa beat me!"
"Hmm, you seem overly happy about your physical trauma..." Memory mused in a slightly concerned voice.
"That's because she didn't want to be pitied..." another voice added.
Patricia turned to the voice, and saw an image of Reimu, her default facial expression far closer to the real Reimu's than Memory's to Yukari.
Raising one eyebrow, Patricia asked, "So, who do you represent?"
"I'm your conscience, Patty." Reimu's lookalike answered, "I must say, it was good of you to let go of your pride. By acknowledging you were weaker than your elders, you've learnt something about life..."
"I have?" Patricia said in a quizzical tone, "I swear, I've just been shooting up fairies, evil spirits, and getting into spell-card battles, I don't think I've learnt anything of value..."
"Well, I guess you could say it started when you had to steal that book for Marisa. Although you didn't tell Marisa this, you required that Magician Youkai's help to get out of the library that this memory bank is based upon..." Conscience explained, "Also, your Uncle Jean gave you a hakkero and taught you how to use it, Dawitsu was the one who led you to the entrance to the underground, that Oni woman directed you to the Palace of the Earth Spirits, the Satori in the Palace let you through without even a fight... are you beginning to understand the lesson?"
"Okay, okay, I get it..." Patricia said in a slightly sarcastic tone, "...I guess it's that I still need help from everyone in order to solve an incident, is that it?"
"Not only that, but sometimes in life, things are out of your control..." 'Reimu' said, beginning to sound like some kind of soap-box campaigner, "...and in those times, you have to rely on the goodwill of others. However, just because you had to rely on the goodwill of others doesn't mean that you do not work hard yourself. A combination of both is required to get though life in general..."
"And I guess you want me to have the same goodwill to others in their time of need, right?" Patricia remarked, "This couldn't get any more cheesy, you know..."
"Well, I am your conscience, I would prefer it if you were nice to others..." Conscience replied, "There are... others which would see things... a little differently..."
Patricia didn't even have time to question who these 'others' were before Reimu's lookalike had conjured three images up, one being of a slightly younger-looking Jean, one being of an even younger-looking Marisa, and one being of a more-or-less accurate Dawitsu, albeit a rendition of him after he had recently shaved.
Conscience smiled to herself, "For a balanced view, why not see what these guys have to say for themselves, you might gain something from their input that I can't add... well... actually, I think the third one just sneaked here without my permission, but whatever... "
Patricia decided to question the three figments in narrative order, and so, approached her 'Uncle Jean' first, and asked him the same thing she asked Conscience first, "Okay, what do you represent?"
"Rationality..." the image of Jean replied, "...I will go through things in a logical manner, and tell you the facts."
"Is that so?" Patricia remarked, "You're a lot more sure of yourself than the real Uncle Jean, that's for sure. So, what are 'the facts'?"
"You're weak." Rationality stated, "Far, far weaker than you thought. Ready to solve an incident? HA! Reimu lost her adoptive mother before she was your age, she had to live alone. She was really tough, the real deal. You weren't ready, you just scraped through actually solving the thing... your legs are now burned for the rest of your life. The burns may stop hurting and fade a little, but they'll always be red... good luck finding a boyfriend!"
"Jeez, Rationality's a bit of a jerk, isn't he?" Patricia remarked, "Why the hell is someone as nice as Uncle Jean representing him..."
"Hey, hey, I'm not done!" Rationality interrupted, "But, by almost failing and getting a permanent reminder of that near failure, you will know not to rush into dangerous situations again. Your Uncle Jean was right to fear for your safety. He was the only one that voiced concern when you decided to fight Aunty Marisa, and well, now you're... I dunno, comatose, or something... yeah, you'd think the burns would have taught you a thing or two, but apparently not..."
Patricia swallowed to herself, and shrugged her shoulders, "Well, okay, I take your point. I thought I was invincible, but I wasn't... hmm, Conscience, is it okay if you take Uncle Jean... I mean, Rationality away?"
Conscience nodded, and clicked her fingers, making the figment disappear, "Whatever you wish..."
Moving on to the image of Marisa, Patricia put her hands to her hips and asked, "Okay then. Who are you supposed to be?"
"I'm your Hedonism!" 'Marisa' replied in a voice somehow even more enthusiastic than the original.
"Hedonism?" Patricia asked, "How the hell are figments of my imagination using vocabulary I'm unaware of?"
"Who cares, as long as the explanation's fun, right?" Hedonism replied.
"Huh?" Patricia enunciated, not quite sure what to make of this figment, "I'm not sure where you're going with this..."
"Don't you get it? I'm the fun-loving part of your brain!" Hedonism explained with a great shout, "Oh, wasn't the part where you shot up those Magician Youkai cool? And the part with the little shooting robot-thingy? And fighting an Oni? Oh, fighting an Oni really gives me an adrenaline rush! Ah, and then there was that doorwoman! Oh, wasn't it hilarious seeing her get all mad like that? Oh, and then there was that robot! Wow, he was tough, you almost died, that was the real deal right there, that was true euphoria! Oh, if only every day was like that, huh? I want you to keep solving incidents, because that was so very very fun! Can you please go and solve something again? I'm sure that you can just ask Yukari to make a fake incident if you wanted to... oh, but then again, knowing it's fake ruins the fun... oh, unless you cause an incident yourself and then solve it again..."
Throughout this excessively wordy gushing of emotion, Patricia had been slowly building up to just yelling the words 'Shut up' at the childish version of her beloved 'Aunt', however, she ultimately remained calm, quietly saying to Conscience, "Make her disappear, would you?"
Conscience smirked to herself, "Of course..."
With a click of 'Reimu's' fingers, the mad-with-ecstasy rendition of Marisa disappeared before Patricia's... 'dream-eyes', and so, she folded her arms, moving on to the final apparition in the sequence.
"So, what do you represent? I bet it's something like insanity, knowing you..." Patricia mused.
"Sex-drive, honey." 'Dawitsu' calmly replied, extending a rather limp-wristed arm as some kind of 'gesture' to prove it.
Patricia was naturally a little shocked by this revelation, and turned bright red, "...what... what the hell..."
"Why are you surprised?" Sex Drive asked, "Oh, is it the person I look like? Well, I'm like the only young-looking man you really know. I mean, you are straight, and it'd be kinda weird if your Uncle Jean was Sex Drive, wouldn't it? I mean, we all know Freud was wrong about the whole 'lusting after your parents' thing..."
Patricia began to quiver at the thought of subconsciously having a thing for a youkai, never mind someone as goofy as him, "...um... I don't even know who Freud is... I... um... I need a minute..."
Sex Drive cocked his head, "What's wrong, darling? Do you need a back-rub? I'm very good at back-rubs..."
Patricia shook her head, "...n-no, I'm... I'm... good."
"You seem so troubled..." 'Dawitsu' remarked, "...is something paining you? I'll kiss it better..."
"I... I..." Patricia turned to Conscience in a fit of rage, "OKAY, WHY THE HELL DID YOU MAKE MY SEX DRIVE APPEAR? I DIDN'T WANT TO KNOW THAT I FOUND THIS GUY ATTRACTIVE!"
Conscience smiled absent-mindedly, "I didn't summon him, he just appeared. Sexual thoughts occur in dreams, it's pretty much a spontaneous thing. Usually it's a sign you're about to wake up..."
"Yes, that's why I'm here!" Sex Drive suddenly spoke up, "I'm here to help you wake up! Now..." Sex Drive proceeded to turn around, "...what do you think of my ass? It looks nice, doesn't it..."
Patricia stepped back from the clearly uncontrollable impulse, "...I... this... this is just too... okay, I gotta wake up, this is uncomfortable..."
'Dawitsu' suddenly began to act a little more in character, and jumped up and down while clapping gleefully, "Oh goodie, I've managed to use my awkwardness for the sake of good! Maybe if you went to the school Dawitsu was talking about, you'd find some human boys your own age to replace this mediocre image..."
Patricia was beginning to feel nauseous, and she began to wretch. Suddenly, her mouth filled up, and her cheeks puffed out, and then, as she turned away from her Conscience, Sex Drive, and long since forgotten-about Memory, she threw up, before blacking out in the dream world...
Marisa's House, the Forest of Magic, around ten-thirty ante-meridian
Patricia finally woke up in the real world, her first stimuli being the sound of Jean and Marisa arguing with each other frantically, her vision too blurry to pick up anything significant in the sight department.
"Look, she's been unconscious for an hour, now, I think we should tell Reimu!" Jean's voice shouted to Marisa.
"But... but we can't! She'll just get mad, and I don't want the grief! Look, she's fine, we've just got to wait!" Marisa replied with equal volume.
"Your 'wake-up potion' did nothing, so what makes you so confident?" Jean asked, "If Reimu finds this out for herself, I can assure you that she'd give us far more grief! And that's besides the point, Patricia could be seriously injured!"
Patricia's vision gradually sharpened, and the resulting image her brain had processed had determined she was in Marisa's study.
"...stop... shouting... Uncle Jean..." Patricia mumbled to the pair of human magicians, turning her head to face the noise.
"Patricia, you're alright!" Jean said in a highly relieved voice, "Oh, I'm so glad you're okay! Do you need anything? Are you hungry?"
"I'm... I'm... fine..." Patricia murmured, "I... feel a bit sick, actually."
"Oh..." Marisa laughed to herself nervously, "...that might be the wake-up potion I gave you. I gave it to you ages ago, though, I wonder why it's only taking effect now..."
Patricia sighed... it was probably whatever was in that 'potion' which caused her to have such bizarre dreams. Pushing herself so she could sit up, she smiled at Marisa, "Well... I guess I lost, huh?"
"Yup!" Marisa bragged, "You're pretty good, but a long way off from beating your Aunty Marisa in a straight match!"
Jean face-palmed, "...to think that Patricia could have died..."
"Lighten up, will you, Jean?" Marisa mocked, "You're acting like Patricia wasn't gonna get up! Come on, she survived that crazy robot, there's no way that our little game was gonna end in tragedy!"
"I'll remind you it was my doubts that made sure she was okay..." Jean pointed out.
"Huh?" Patricia asked, "What do you mean, Uncle Jean?"
"I caught you as you fell... Marisa wasn't going to get there in time." Jean explained, "I may be slow, but I was in the right place at the right time..."
"Oh..." Patricia looked to Jean, and saw that he was just as rational as the version she had seen in her dreams, only far kinder...
Getting up off the sofa, she hugged the slightly-younger-than-middle-aged man, and said, "Thank you, Uncle Jean... I... I need to say thank you to everyone that's helped me..."
Jean was unprepared for the hug, so just stood there, not really sure what the sudden affectionate streak in Patricia was owing to, "...uh... it's not a problem, Patricia, I would do everything I could to keep you from harm..."
Marisa rolled her eyes, "Yeah, anything but keep her from fighting me. You're a big old wimp, you know that..."
However, Marisa's speech was cut short by Patricia switching hug victim, and the shrine maiden proceeded to say in hug, "...thanks for not going easy on me in the end... I was talking like a big-shot when I shouldn't have... sorry, Aunty Marisa..."
Marisa fidgeted a little, "Uh... okay, while it's nice that you're not being all sarcastic like Reimu is, you might wanna cut down on the hugging... did I accidentally slip in some Psilocybin mushrooms into the potion, I wonder..."
Patricia let go, and said, "...sorry... wow, I haven't hugged you in a while, Aunty Marisa..."
Marisa smirked to herself, "I guess that I'm a 'look, but don't touch' kinda gal. So... uh... you won't be telling Reimu you almost died, will ya?"
Patricia folded her arms, "Hey, that's a large burden, I can't keep up lies as well as you can!"
"Me? Lie?" Marisa said, shocked at the 'accusation', "I never lie!"
However, before either Patricia or Jean could call Marisa out on the very false nature of this statement, a knock was heard on the door.
Patricia looked at the adults, who were both wondering who could be visiting at such a time, and they clearly had both come to the conclusion it was Reimu, judging by the worried expressions that their faces switched to after a brief pause.
Knowing they were probably too afraid to open the door, Patricia rolled her eyes and volunteered herself, "...fine, I'll get it..."
Walking out of the study and towards the door, Patricia opened the door, however, found no-one at head-level to open the door to. Sighing to herself, she mumbled, "Must have been a prank call..."
However, a voice from below her shouted, "Hey, down here!"
Patricia halted mid-closure of the door, and looked down to see a miniature rendition of someone she didn't exactly want to see at the moment... Dawitsu.
Blushing, she mumbled, "...uh... hi... what brings you here?"
"Well, I've been told by the original that I've got to give invitations for a party he's throwing." the dwarf answered, "I also had to give one to the residents of the Hakurei Shrine, including Reimu, who had just got up..." the dwarf turned around, showing his posterior, complete with several needles stuck there, "...she's... not a morning person, and said some nasty things about the original, something about kidnapping or something. Anyway, she's looking for ya, you know..."
"Oh crap, that isn't good..." Patricia mused, trying her best not to react to the humorous injuries sustained by the miniature clone, "...so... when's the party?"
"Tonight, any time that's night will do, that's what the original said." the Chibi said, "So, I guess I should give you guys three invitations? Reimu ripped hers up..."
"Um..." Patricia didn't exactly want to go to the Dawitsu Mansion given the... awkward imagery she had recently seen of the man, but figured that it would be a load of fun regardless, and so, she took three invitations from the tiny man, saying, "Thanks a lot!" before slamming the door in the poor clone's face.
Reading one of the invitations over, she quoted, "The master of the Dawitsu Mansion cordially invites you to a most fabulous party... hmm, yes, only he would say something like 'fabulous'..."
Walking back into the study, Patricia began to say, "Hey, Aunty Marisa and Uncle Jean, there's an invitation for..." before the former interrupted her.
"WE'RE SCREWED! SHE'S LOOKING FOR YOU!" Marisa yelled, "What do we do?"
"I was gonna go home and tell her the truth anyway..." Patricia replied, "...sorry to burst your bubble, but you can't keep secrets forever..."
Jean was quite impressed with how smart Patricia was for her age, and mused, "Funny how a thirteen year-old knows that more than a thirty-six year-old..."
"...well... well... I'm not going to that party, I don't want to meet Reimu there..." Marisa said in a clearly frightened voice.
"I don't honestly think she wants to go if she ripped up her invitation..." Patricia lied, "...anyway, I'm gonna go home and hope that she comes back soon..."
Jean smiled to himself, "...well, if you are going, I'll go to the mimicker's party too, Patricia. We'll all go together, how about that?"
Patricia smirked to herself, turning to Marisa, "Well, well... I guess it's gonna be suspicious that you didn't show up... I wonder, if Reimu does go to this party, she might be wondering why you'd turn down such an event..."
"Okay, okay, I get it!" Marisa conceded, "Honestly, why'd you have to be such a little smart-ass? Didn't getting your butt kicked teach you anything?"
Patricia shuddered, "...more than I'd like to know..."
The Dawitsu Mansion, a little earlier
Dawitsu, who had just gotten home and was in the middle of hand-writing a set of invitations for a certain party at the foyer table, was trying his best to rebuff any questions from Ran, who was, as predicted, not best pleased with his behaviour.
"You promised you'd spend more time with Chen and I..." Ran ranted, standing over the mimicker with her hands on her hips.
"Look, I'm organising a party, so we'll have some fun together..." Dawitsu muttered.
"But you ended up staying up as usual, and then got up early just to get yourself hurt playing with that shrine maiden..." Ran nagged.
"Look, I don't need this..." Dawitsu dismissively replied, before finding out the hard way that this was not the correct response, as Ran proceeded to pick him up by his charred cloak, and throw him to the floor.
"LISTEN to me!" Ran yelled, "Would it hurt you to just stop running around? I was happy to settle down when we got married, so why aren't you?"
"You know, there's nothing stopping you coming along to the fights I get into..." Dawitsu replied, "In fact, I think we'd make a good battle couple..."
Ran walked so she was standing over the mimicker, dwarfing him completely and giving him a particularly frightening glare, "...yet you still went off and decided to have fun with that human magician, not even telling me..."
"Look, the only reason I didn't tell you is because you'd react like..." Dawitsu began to say, before Ran stamped on one of his feet, causing him to yell, "OWWWW!" before he rather suddenly composed himself, "...oh my... heh heh... this is starting to turn out like our wedding night all over again..."
Ran's expression turned from an angry one to one with a strangely twisted form of glee, "...oh... I'm even standing over you..."
Dawitsu giggled, and stood up, releasing a set of Chibi clones from himself, "...well, I think I'll let those guys finish off the job..." Dawitsu stopped talking, and pointed to his genetic doubles, "You heard me, get writing and delivering, move, move, move!"
After that, Dawitsu turned back to Ran with a grin, "So, what do we do now?"
"Well, you owe me one, so I think..." Ran began to say, but Dawitsu had the fourth wall to worry about.
"Ran, please think of the censors, this is only a T-rated fanfiction!" Dawitsu said as his clones got to work on writing invitations as others rushed out of the house carrying invitations, "...anyway, I think I'm in the mood for your kinda stuff this time around..."
Ran giggled, and took hold of Dawitsu the same way a groom carries a bride, and the two nuzzled their noses, the former saying, "...Chen's fast asleep, so we have the foyer all to ourselves..."
"Lucky us..." Dawitsu mused, "...as long as the Chibis don't mind watching..."
However, as the two initialised whatever mating rituals a tengu lookalike and a kitsune could possibly be obligated to perform, a certain sound interrupted their love-making... the ring of the doorbell.
"Damn it, cock-blocked by the plot!" Dawitsu called, his shirt fully unbuttoned and his hair a veritable mess.
The mimicker headed for the door while the kitsune put what clothes she had removed back on, calling out to the man, "Remember you owe me!"
"Of course!" Dawitsu called back as he headed for the door. Opening it, he revealed a less-than-happy-looking Reimu.
"Okay, where the hell is Patricia? You know something about this, don't you?" Reimu yelled, "It's a good thing your stupid clone came in to invite me to your stupid party, so I could deal with you here and now!"
"Actually, I was about to have sex, can the fighting wait..." Dawitsu calmly and somewhat shamelessly proclaimed.
Reimu glared at Dawitsu, seeming to calm down for a moment, before exploding, "I KNEW IT! YOU'RE A LOLICON!"
Ran quickly got up, adjusting her bra underneath her dress as she walked to the doorway, and hurriedly said, "...it isn't like that, it was with me! We're married, for pity's sake, why would he..."
"AND IT'S A THREESOME?" Reimu yelled, her anger levels clearly through the roof.
"Jesus, calm down, will you?" Dawitsu said, "It's not the first time Patricia's gone out before you've woken up. However, I do know something about her location. If you're willing to stop shouting and drink some tea, maybe I'll tell you..."
Reimu groaned, "...sorry, I thought you'd kidnapped her... Patricia's all trusting of you, and then you have an invitation for some kind of creepy party... and... I mean, you're a teacher, and..."
Ran laughed a little haughtily, "You don't know what it's like to be a real woman, so you wouldn't know that he'd never cheat on me, not with your successor, not with anyone!"
Dawitsu pinched his nose, "...can we please just drop this whole thing and drink some tea, please..."
Thirty minutes and one tea-drinking session later, Dawitsu finally decided to stop withholding information, "Okay, Reimu, you feeling better?"
Reimu sat back on the Dawitsu Mansion's foyer sofa, her expression now incredibly cheerful, "Ah... it feels like heaven... what's in this tea?"
"Amineptine..." Dawitsu blurted out, "...I mean... just strawberry and sugar, your usual..."
Ran's eyes widened, "...so that's why you insisted on making the tea yourself..."
"Oh... oh, I feel all funny..." Reimu said with a calm, zen-like grin, "...so... uh... Patricia... she's fine, right?"
"Well, Patricia knocked on my door this morning asking about the ultimate cause of the incident, and I told her about Marisa's accidental activation of the Gizoid." Dawitsu explained, "And then she went to her house..."
"So... so she's with Marisa and Jean... that's good, I trust them..." Reimu half-whispered.
"Um... how much Amineptine did you put in her tea?" Ran asked, "She'd never be this nice about Marisa normally..."
"I gave her enough." Dawitsu replied, "Anyway, that's not the full story. I couldn't get back to sleep, so I decided to go out and be Patricia's extra boss, but she'd already picked Marisa. Then I fought Patricia together with Marisa, and..."
"Ha! You and Marisa..." Reimu began to giggle to herself, "...and I bet she kicked your sorry butts, right?"
Dawitsu laughed to himself nervously, hoping that he had given Reimu enough Amineptine, "...well... from what I saw, she... uh... lost on the last spell-card..."
"Huh?" Reimu suddenly acted in a more aware, normal manner, her slouched posture straightening.
"Don't worry! She's fine, just a bit... unconscious, that's all! I'm sure one of my clones will visit Marisa's house and find that she's totally fine..." Dawitsu said in a defensive tone, doing his best to simply keep Reimu from throttling him.
And, just as Dawitsu said this, a certain dwarf clone entered the house, and said, "Hey, I visited Marisa's house, and found Patricia! She's totally fine!"
Dawitsu smiled, and said, "See, what did I tell you?"
Reimu sat back again, and said, "Oh... that's good... as long as she's safe... hey... hey, Dawitsu, can you give me some more tea?"
Ran sighed to herself, "...well, why should we refuse?"
"She... is a guest, after all..." Dawitsu mused, and then clicked to bring the Chibi who had been the bearer of good news to him, whispering, "...okay, make Reimu a strawberry tea, three sugars and plenty of Amineptine..."
"Yes, sir!" the clone replied, and zipped into the kitchen.
"Hmm... well, with Reimu here, I guess practically all of Gensokyo's coming to this post-incident party..." Dawitsu mused, "...it's gonna a be a big party, which all our friends are invited to..."
Reimu snickered to herself, "You have friends? Don't make me laugh!"
Ran rolled her eyes, "...let's just hope the drugs don't wear off any time soon..."
The Dawitsu Mansion, several hours later, presumably at a time the master considers 'night'
The night fell upon Gensokyo like a black cloak, quickly covering the whole area in darkness... however, one part of it, a part which continuously generated both heat and light, was the Dawitsu Mansion, the rocket engines that allowed it to stay afloat blazing as always.
While Dawitsu had sent an invitation to almost everyone in Gensokyo, very few people within the large cast of characters actually knew of the mimicker's existence, and so, in addition to Dawitsu, Ran, Chen, and the still rather drugged Reimu, only a select few people had arrived so far, these select few being Yutaka Hadekawa, Patchouli Knowledge, Sakuya Izayoi, Rinnosuke Morichika, Suika Ibuki, Sanae Kochiya, and... for some reason, Mamizou Futatsuiwa.
Reimu was finding the poor turn-out naturally rather hilarious, "HA! I told you you had no friends!"
Dawitsu was trying his best to ignore the now-irritating shrine maiden, and instead, decided to hold his current conversation with Mamizou, "...so, what techniques do you use to shape-shift? I'm curious, because at the moment, I need a machine..."
Mamizou seemed to be the only one in the party smoking, and so she drew attention as she demonstrated by covering herself in the stuff, transforming into an image of Nue with ease, "Just like that. What's the matter, can't observe through all that smoke?"
Dawitsu coughed a little, "...yeah, it's kinda difficult..."
Reimu was beginning to get a little frustrated, her drug-influenced mind making her decide that the best remedy to this was throw a miniature tantrum, "Hey, idiot! You said Patricia was coming to this party, but I don't see her, do you?"
Dawitsu opened his mouth to say something, but Mamizou answered first, transforming into a fake Patricia before saying, "Well, you can see her now, can't you?"
"Wow, when did you get here, Patty?" Reimu asked in genuine awe.
"No, it's still me..." Mamizou answered, transforming back into her regular form, "...wow, she's really gone, isn't she?"
"I've been dealing with her for hours, just trying to keep her from going out in this state..." Dawitsu mused.
The night continued like this for a while, the class level remaining within reasonable levels, that was, until the alcohol was taken out. Sakuya, Suika, and Sanae all decided, in all their alliterative glory, to hog all of the whiskey Dawitsu had acquired throughout the years, and Dawitsu, surprisingly, didn't decide to join them in getting drunk, and instead was becoming more and more preoccupied with the fact that Patricia hadn't arrived yet... had she just turned down the invitation?
Dawitsu sighed, this was not going well... at this rate, the drugs Reimu was on would wear off and he would get an earful for lying... and to make matters worse, Yukari Yakumo and her Oni Shikigami had just entered the party, as spontaneously as the formation of Ammonia from Nitrogen and Hydrogen under high pressure. Strangely enough, she had got talking to her former shikigami while drinking directly from a vodka bottle she had pulled from the same nowhere that she had pulled herself from.
This was... a strange night. And then, finally, Dawitsu heard the sound of the bell he had been so desperately awaiting, and opened it to find Patricia, flanked by her 'Aunt' and 'Uncle'.
"Um... hey there, Dawitsu. Heard there was a party... are we late?" Patricia asked, but looked upon the drunken antics being caused by the three women bearing names beginning with S, and assumed that yes, they were.
Dawitsu laughed awkwardly to himself, "Well, yes, just a little..." Dawitsu suddenly noticed Patricia was a little fidgety around him, and cocked his head, asking, "...um... what's up, did I say something wrong?"
"N-never mind!" Patricia yelled, and barged into the house, running out of Dawitsu's immediate area as quickly as possible.
Marisa and Jean looked to each other, and the former asked, "Hmm, I wonder what's up with her?"
Jean shrugged his shoulders, "She seemed fine until she saw the mimicker... so, is Reimu here?"
"Yeah, she's high as Zeus on the couch over there, so she should be easy to deal with..." Dawitsu pointed to the set of couches in which Reimu was sitting, laughing to herself with glee as she watched Suika down an entire bottle of whiskey before the clearly impressed Sakuya and Sanae.
Meanwhile, Patricia was asking the exact same question of Chen, who was, for the most part, looking upon the whole affair as a little stupid.
"Hey, where's Mum... I mean, where's Reimu?" Patricia asked, "She came to the party, didn't she?"
Chen smirked to herself, "I heard everything when she got here... glad she interrupted Ran-sama and Dawi when she did... anyway, she's sitting over there." Chen pointed at the location in question, where Jean and Marisa were clearly gathering, "She's... been acting funny all day, I think Dawi and Ran-sama did something to her..."
Patricia instantly became concerned, and ran to see what that 'something' was, and called out, "Mum! Are you okay?"
Reimu suddenly became alert, and turned to Patricia's voice, slurring, "Hey... hey, Patricia, give your Mummy a hug, I've missed you so much!"
Patricia was very disconcerted by Reimu's odd behaviour, and turned to Marisa, "I don't suppose you know what's going on at the moment?"
"She's high, according to that mimicker..." Marisa answered, "...she's pretty funny, too..."
"Marisa, there's nothing funny about loving your daughter!" Reimu replied, "Patty, give me a hug! I heard that you gave these two slackers hugs, and I was the one who raised you, so give me a hug..."
Patricia sat down on the couch, afraid of what she'd do if she didn't oblige, and awkwardly hugged the older shrine maiden, who hugged with an unusual amount of force.
"...oh, Patty... you're a good girl, and... and... I'm sorry you lost against Marisa and that loser, but...maybe next time, huh?" Reimu said, "You solved the incident and that's what matters... I love you, Patty..."
Patricia was feeling highly uncomfortable by the whole situation, but tried to remain cheerful, "...I... I love you too..."
At this point, a fifth person entered the group of humans, one who was distinctly not human, and ambiguously youkai for that matter. The person in question was Yukari Yakumo, and, for once, she did not have her mysterious elegance with her in the slightest.
"Isn't this a charming moment?" Yukari asked, "It's good to know that Reimu still only lets her feelings know when influenced by a chemical of some sorts..."
Fortunately for Patricia, Reimu heard that remark, and released her successor, turning to face the Border Youkai, "Hey, Yukari, thanks for giving me Patricia like you did, you're awesome! But did you have to give her as a screaming baby, she was not easy to raise..."
Yukari chuckled to herself, "...wow, I think Dawitsu should give you Amineptine more often, you're quite affable like this..."
Marisa laughed at this, "Tell me about it, she's hilarious!"
Patricia rolled her eyes, "Speak for yourself, I'm the one she's hanging all over..."
Reimu began to giggle to herself, "Oh, Patty, I'm just telling you that I care, because... I...I think I'm a nasty mum at times, and I find it hard to be nice, but with that magic tea the loser youkai gave to me, I feel like I can say anything..."
Jean sighed, "...am I the only one who prefers the sober Reimu? She's slightly scary when she's like this..."
"Damn it, you're hot!" Reimu blurted out of nowhere to Jean, "Hey, why do you like Marisa more than me, huh? What's she got that I haven't?"
Yukari looked to Patricia, and calmly said, "...an argument's probably going to break out here... Patricia, I want to talk to you in private, if you will..."
Patricia took her leave from the socially dangerous situation, and said, "Yeah, sure, I can talk..."
Yukari opened a gap rather gratuitously, and the two walked out from the conversation, taking them a whole fifteen metres away, to the kitchen of the Dawitsu Mansion. There, Yukari took a seat at what was supposed to be a worktop, and gapped herself a bottle of sake for good measure.
"Miss Patricia Hakurei..." Yukari mused, "...you're quite the talented little girl, aren't you?"
"...well... not as talented as I thought..." Patricia mumbled, "I mean, I lost to Aunty Marisa, and I thought a Hakurei Shrine Maiden never loses any battles... what happened?"
Yukari chuckled to herself, "Wow, you're sharp. You knew I wanted to talk about your role as the Hakurei Miko of the future. So... how are you going to deal with your loss?"
"Um... I don't know..." Patricia honestly answered, "...well, I guess I should train more. I thought I was skilled enough to go out, but I guess I'm still only starting out..."
Yukari smiled to herself, "When Reimu started out, she could only walk about and bat a yin-yang orb around. She needed a certain... Chelonid Youkai whenever she wanted to fly. In terms of raw strength, she was actually much weaker than you when she was your age, though she doesn't like to admit it."
"But... but..." Patricia was suddenly feeling a little insulted for Reimu, "But she's still stronger than me, I just... have... a feeling about it."
"That's because there is a manner in which she was stronger than you, Patricia." Yukari explained, "Now, you're adopted, your mother was a coward who ran away from raising you, and so, I guess you can say that isn't anything to be sniffed at. But Reimu was just like that, and, to top it off, Reimu Hakurei the twelfth... that is, your predecessor's predecessor, she died a little prematurely. Reimu had to raise herself... it was a challenge for her to simply survive in Gensokyo on her own, let alone be powerful enough to challenge youkai and solve incidents..."
"...so... she had strength of character..." Patricia deduced Yukari's message rather swiftly.
"You're quick on the uptake." Yukari remarked, "Perhaps when you get to sixteen, you'll be even quicker than Reimu was at that age. Yes, what you... only partially lack, due to you being relatively spoiled, is strength of character. Reimu doesn't like to admit it, but at first, she worked incredibly hard to develop her skills, and nowadays, she has earned her position of being easily able to overwhelm almost anyone in her way. So, I ask you... what are you going to do to change that?"
The question hit Patricia pretty hard, and she didn't quite know what the 'right' response was. She hesitated, before saying, "...well... what would you suggest?"
Yukari drank a little sake, and mused, "I asked what you're going to do to change that. I can't decide that for you..."
Patricia thought to herself, and then took out a certain octagonal prism from her pocket, "I... guess I could train myself in Marisa's magic, as that would give me something I have to study hard to grasp... that way I'll kind of know how Reimu felt..."
"That's... not a bad idea..." Yukari replied, "...I find it a shame that Marisa hasn't recruited herself a successor, but I'm not obligated to provide her with one. You... you're required for the upkeep of the Hakurei Border..."
Patricia smiled to herself, "Oh yeah, seeing as you're the Border Youkai, you'll know... what exactly does Reimu do to maintain the border? She's always so vague about it, and says that 'I'll know when the time comes'. What's she talking about?"
Yukari swigged from her bottle of sake again, and sat back, saying, "...well, don't tell Reimu I told you this, but maintaining the Hakurei Border goes something like this..."
The party went on into the morning, the resulting mess of drunken and drug-influenced antics filling the Dawitsu Mansion with a great many noise... it had seemed that Patricia's adventure had finally come to a close.
While the party was in the foyer, Patricia and Yukari stayed in the kitchen, and for a large portion of the night, simply talked over more complex issues than a drinking game known as 'Ring of Fire'. While drunk, Yukari almost acted as the unusually philosophical thirteen year-old's intellectual equal, and so, the conversations were both surprisingly simple and to the point, yet impenetrably complex on a conceptual level.
Eventually their discussions were brought to an end by a certain older shrine maiden getting hungry and thirsty, and therefore demanded chocolate and spiked tea from the exasperated 'master' of the house, who ironically seemed to be the only sane person in the foyer at the moment...
Patricia ended up going home, along with Jean and Marisa, but almost everyone else at the party ended up in some variant of 'passed out on the floor', Dawitsu and Ran only staying because they lived there, and Yutaka Hadekawa due to an obligation to want to clean up after the chaos of the night.
Truly, another tale had been brought to a close in Gensokyo, but who is to say what may have occurred in the future... the fantasy kitchen sink's entropy seemed to be slowly rising once again...
Author's Note: Aaaaaaaaaaaaand done. This is it, final chapter. If you're gonna review the book at all, do it here, heh heh.
And a special congratulations to anyone who got through this without reading my older Touhou works, because you get blessed with not having to read the crappy things, yet still getting various hints at the continuity anyways...
...in fact, anyone who did come here without reading the rest of the series, please show yourselves and comment, I wanna see if this stood up okay on its own, heh heh.
Right, I'll be seeing ya! Byeeeee!