A/N ~ Hey everyone! I know it's been a while, but after some solid prodding from my good moirail, I was prompted to write, and publish, Homestuck.

I AM WARNING YOU RIGHT NOW. I have only recently begun reading Homestuck. I have NOT gotten to the ancestors yet. Soon. But for now this takes place after Fef 'breaks up' with Eridan and sort of turns into its own timeline. I'M SORRY IF IT IS OOC. I tried very hard to keep them in character and work with the anatomy descriptions I could find on the internet.

Also she likes porn. A LOT. XD So yeah, this is slightly graphic porn. Not my worst by far, but definitely not for the feint of heart.

Also, I couldn't get the colors to show up, so imagine they are colored. They are in Word, but unfortunately FF doesn't work like that.

So, without further ado, Homestuck smut.


EDIT::: I forgot the stupid ) ( in Fef's damn quirk! It should be fixed now. Also the 3's in Nep's. Also the arrows don't show up so *shrug*.

The Study of the Effects of Mind Honey

It was dark in Nepeta's cave, the only light around coming from a few flickering candles that had become one with the dusty floor. Her kitten mind was racing, her heart pounding, as she looked over her shipping wall.

":33 Hmm…" she purred to herself. She felt the urge down in her acid-producing nutrient well. It made her skin quiver and she bit her lip. Yes… she knew this feeling all too well. It was in every thought in her mind and it was in every fiber of her being.

She needed to ship. And ship hard.

She gazed upon the painted wall, searching through the yes's and the no's, her clawed finger moving swiftly, yet confidently across the portrayals of her dear friends. She stopped suddenly. Yes. This was a ship she had yet to test out at sea. But it would be a hard one to pull off.

Usually she would just wait for a ship to sail on its own, to test out the waters of the big, wide ocean, with her only gazing thoughtfully at the spectacle. But with the itch she felt right now, she needed to go beyond her comfort zone and set the wheels in motion. It had been too long since something juicy had happened.

But just how would she get these two together? She purred quietly and rubbed her fuzzy gloves against her head. Suddenly, she was struck with inspiration, and a wide grin spread over her face.

- - twinArmageddons [TA] began trolling cuttlefishCuller [CC] at10:53 - -

TA: hey fef. how'2 iit going down there iin the ocean today? ii'm okay ii guess. My hive wa2 broken iintwo la2t niight. fucker made a huge me22 of my miind honey.

CC: Glub.

TA: Umm,okay?

CC: ) (ey Sol, look, now's not a good glubbing time okay?

TA: Why?

CC: It's -Eridan. I'm worried about ) (im.

TA: that nub-2ucking bulge-muncher? you worry about him two much. you need two drop him.

CC: T) (at's t) (e problem! I already did!

TA: what?

CC: -Earlier today I told ) (im we were FINished. Done for. I'm so seasick of ) (is bulls) (it all t) (e time. Always w) (ining and –Emotional.

TA: yeah, he can be 2uch a wiggler 2ometiime2.

CC: But ) (e was MY wiggler. We were moirails and I broke ) (is heart. Now ) (e's out somew) (ere and I t) (ink ) (e might try somet) (ing drastic.

TA: fef that ii2 not your concern. iif he off2 hiim2elf, that ju2t mean2 he wa2n't 2uiited two reproduce and further our 2pecie2.

CC: T) (at was mean. 38(

TA: 2orry.

CC: I'm going to go fish for ) (im.

TA: ii'll be right there.

- - cuttlefishCuller [CC] ceased trolling twinArmageddons [TA] - -

Sollux sighed and shut off his computer, put his glasses to the side, and laid his head in his hands. He was so compliant with Fef. It was strange. His grey face felt hot, his golden blood rising to the surface. So…flush. He closed his red and blue eyes and sighed. Feelings were just too much hassle.

He pushed himself out of his chair and put his glasses back on. Right. Now it was time to help Feferi find that pathetic grub of a high-blood. He left his hive and headed for the ocean, his feet tracing the path he knew all too well from his many visits to the grand underwater hive.

When he reached the shore, Feferi wasn't waiting, like she normally was. Instead she was swimming on the surface of the great blue water, far out to sea. Sollux closed his eyes and focused, making himself hover in midair. He glided easily across the water until he came to a stop near Feferi.

"where ii2 he?" he asked over the roar of the waves. There was a storm coming, he bet.

"Down here! He's trying to feed himself to my Lusus!" Feferi shouted before she slipped back underwater, as graceful as any fish. Sollux shook himself back to his senses when he felt his mind becoming too enthralled with the shape of that particular female troll while she was swimming. If he wanted to stay in her favor, he was going to have to help save Eridan.

Unfortunately, he was not a high-blooded, hoity-toity sea-dweller. Instead he would have to use his particular Psionic powers to his advantage. He closed his eyes, focusing all his energy like an arrow that shot through the foamy waves. The energy searched in the murky depths, feeling out for Feferi, or Eriden, or the fearsome beast that was her Lusus. A weak pulse found him and he shot for it, trying to keep enough energy to keep himself hovering in the meantime.

Finally, he found himself with them. He could feel Feferi and Eridan as they were talking. She was trying to dissuade him no doubt. Though Sollux couldn't see why she couldn't just be happy with him. He was all the troll she needed, not that prissy fish she called a moirail. But nonetheless he felt his way into Eridan's mind and he felt the energy calm for a moment as he intruded the personal space.

'2top beiing 2uch a fuckiing wiiggler about thii2, ampora.' He said telepathically.

'Get out of head, Sollux.' Eridan thought back.

'What are you goiing two accomplii2h from thii2 other than breaking fef'2 heart?'

'Go awway, loww-blood. This is none of your concern. And wwhy shouldn't she get a little hurt? She broke up wwith me!'

Suddenly, he went quiet.

'Oh my glub. I AM pathetic, aren't I? So useless and unlovable…'

'2hut up.'

'Wwhat wwas that?'

'ii 2aid, 2hut the fuck up.'

'Wwhy should I take orders from you?'

'becau2e you 2tupiid fi2h, thii2 ii2n't about you! iit'2 about fef! ju2t becau2e you aren't moiiraiil2 anymore, doe2n't mean 2he doe2n't 2till care about you iin some way.'

'Fuck you.'

'fiine wiith me. Ju2t 2top beiing 2uch a wiiggler about thii2.'

And with that, Sollux left the ocean and came back to himself, who was no longer hovering. Fuck. Apparently he had used too much concentration on the mental argument and had forgotten to keep himself in the air. Luckily he wasn't drowning, just wet and floating on the surface. He used what remaining energy he had to hover again and take himself to land. As he touched the ground, he heard a splash and turned to see Feferi and Eridan as they surfaced. He turned back and walked home. Dry clothes were his first priority.

Sollux had changed and was just taking a towel to his wet hair when he heard someone outside his hive. He dropped the absorbent cloth and walked downstairs to the door. He was surprised to see Nepeta standing on his lawnring.

"what?" he asked, probably too harshly. But Nepeta just smiled up at him. She pulled her hands out from behind her back and handed him a cookie. Sollux held it for a second, confusion on his face.

":33 I made them for everyone. Aren't they just purrfectly delicious smelling?"

Sollux groaned and tried to return the baked good. "thank2 nep, but ii really don't want a cookiie riight now." He meant that, and he really truly wasn't going to touch it, but when she gave him the saddest kitten eyes he had ever seen, he faltered. "fiine." He said. "thank you." and he shut the door.

Once he was inside he looked at the cookie. It was rather large, and Nepeta didn't lie. It did smell good. He took a bite. It was like a mixture of every good flavor combined. He took another bite. Dammit. The last thing he needed was a sugar addiction. He nibbled as he walked back upstairs. He needed to dry his hair. The water was running in rivulets down his neck and was giving him chills. He finished his cookie and was about to pick up the towel when he heard Trollian ping at him. He groaned and flicked on his computer from sleep to see who was bothering him now.

He was hoping it was a certain fish girl, but alas, it was only Ampora. He sat down and immediately felt his head swirl. Woah. He closed his eyes for a moment to let the feeling pass. Must have been the swim he accidentally endured. With his head cleared he opened the chat from Eridan.

- - caligulasAquarium [CA] began trolling twinArmageddons [TA] at 12:35 - -

CA: Wwhat wwas that, Sollux?

TA: iif by 'that' you mean your 2uiiciide attempt that ii 2topped, then you're welcome.

CA: No, I mean trying to wwin ovver my girl like that by being the hero. I didn't wwant to be stopped.

TA: then why diid you?

CA: …

TA: that'2 what ii thought.

CA: Next time, mind your owwn business, loww-blood scum.

TA: you know what you need?

TA: 2omeone need2 two put you iin your place.

- - twinArmageddons [TA] ceased trolling caligulasAquarium [CA] at 12:42 - -

Sollux's mind was spinning. What was going on? Everything was a whirl of color and sight and smell. And feeling. He could remember feeling something…warm and fuzzy. And something about a fish. Was he the fish? No he wasn't. He couldn't be. But he thought he knew a place where he could teach a fish a lesson.

Legs with a mind of their own dragged him out of his hive he used his powers to hover and flew over to the stupid high-blood's hive. Yes. He knew exactly how to teach Eridan a lesson. He still had the warm feeling in his sunny veins and he knew how to quench the fire. He didn't bother knocking, instead opting to shove the door open. Fool didn't even keep it locked.

"Wwhat wwas that?" Sollux heard from the distant part of the hive. He landed on the ground and stood there, waiting until his prey arrive. Eridan was horrified at the land-dweller on his doorstep.

"Wwhat the hell, Sollux? Get out of my hive!"


"Wwhat wwas that, peasant?"

Sollux felt his mind swirl again and he jumped forward at Eridan. He grabbed him by the throat and smiled. "ii 2aiid no." and he licked the fish troll's cheek. Fear crossed his face, but Sollux saw nothing of the sort in his current state.

"Wwhat do you think you are doing?"

"wa2n't iit you who 2aiid you 'wwanted to fuck me'?" Sollux asked, mocking the vocal quirk Eridan was known for. Eridan began to panic then, trying frantically to escape the iron grasp. But Sollux held tight.

"Wwhat?! No! I meant that as an insult! Not an invvitation! I don't do that, Captor."

Sollux smiled and reached his hand in between the other troll's legs. His bone bulge was larger than normal and the troll rubbed it thoughtfully, reveling in the mixed feelings he received from his prey. He leaned in as he started rubbing hard and faster through the pinstriped pants and whispered in his ear.

"don't liie two your2elf, ampora. you want my bulge iin your nook."

And with that Sollux felt Eridan's bulge grow fully and Sollux undid his pants before pulling them down. Not so shyly, the Psionic rubbed his hand over the bulge, the violet tentacle writhing under his touch. Then, gently, Sollux licked the bulge, feeling it twitch under his tongue. He smiled again before licking it all over, letting the sweet taste fill his mouth.

Finally, Sollux glanced briefly at Eridan's flushed face before covering the tentacle with his hot, wet mouth. Eridan gasped and the bulge responded with a wiggle. It was cold, much to Sollux's surprise. Like the pathetic fish he was. He heard some noise and, looking up, Sollux realized Eridan was speaking. He released the tentacle and stood back up to hear the other troll.

"I didn't realize you wwere so red for me, Sollux."

Sollux grinned.

"i could never be red for you. ii hate you."

Realization flooded over Eridan's face and Sollux grabbed his scarf, hard. Eridan gasped and found himself shoved against the door, easily shutting it, the world officially locked out. There was no escaping now. His air was depleting and Sollux grinned again, his head still a whirlwind of feeling. He licked the troll gently, letting up on the scarf and moving it away. He moaned a little, letting his warm tongue glide over cold flesh before biting down, hard, his sharp teeth becoming saturated in sweet, violet blood. Eridan's eyes rolled back in his head and, finally, he let out a sharp moan. Sollux rubbed his knee against Eridan's nook as he licked the bite mark on his companion's neck. He licked his lips and leaned in again for the fish boy's ear.

"tell me you want my bulge iin your nook."

Eridan was panting now, but said nothing. Sollux reached down and ran his fingers against the aforementioned nook and slid them across it, the slit dripping. Suddenly, he thrust his fingers inside, feeling all around the cool passage as his partner gasped.

"fuckiing 2ay iit. tell me you want my pea2ant-blooded bulge iin your high-cla22 2liit."

Some noise dribbled from Eridan's mouth as Sollux's fingers moved inside him. Sollux moved a bit closer and heard him say the magic words. Sollux released him briefly and merely pointed at his pants. He knew he and Eridan both wanted this. Or did he? He wasn't sure when his head was so muffled. All he knew was the feeling he had. Eridan obeyed like a good troll and undid the Psionic's pants. He slid them down and released the golden rod that was Sollux's bulge. Eridan's had resembled a real tentacle, with little nubs that might have even been suction cups and was the same bright violet as his blood. Sollux's on the other hand, was a bright gold. It started at the base as one tentacle, then part way down split into two. And it wasn't long before Eridan went to work on it. He rubbed and sucked and licked, making Sollux gasp for air from the feeling. He was so warm and this fish troll was so cold, it was a beautiful mixture of sensation that made his delusional mind even loopier. Finally, Eridan looked up at Sollux with a pleading expression. Sollux grabbed the scarf, tightening it again, and flipped Eridan over.

With one swift motion, Sollux shoved his pronged bulge into Eridan's nook, and the sensation was unbelievable. He could see the sea troll's bulge wiggling beneath him as Sollux rode him like Eridan rode his Lusus. His bulge slammed in and out of the nook, sending spirals of pleasure to both of them. Sollux leaned over and raked his nails against Eridan's back. Violet leaked from the wounds. Yes. That is what Sollux wanted. Pain was the best pleasure. His head was still spinning and the air was filled with moans and grunts. Finally, he couldn't stand it any longer. He saw stars as he filled Eridan with his genetic material. He saw the puddle that meant Eridan had also had his fill. He pulled out, watching gold drip from his partner, who flipped onto his back, lying in the puddle of his own genetic material. His grey face was flushed and he looked completely spent. Sollux smiled again.

"next time ii'll remember the bucket."

Nepeta squealed from her position outside Eridan's window. Yes! She had sent that ship to sea and it sailed! She applauded herself on her brilliance by giving Sollux the mind honey cookie she had made especially for him. Her itch was gone for now, and she was satisfied. She skipped all the way home to report her findings on the shipping wall.