Warning: Mature subject matter. Lemon scented. Honestly folks, I mean no offense by this story so if sex in a church or the corruption of a priest offends you, PLEASE please don't read it.

Disclaimer: All the wonderful Twilight characters are property of Stephenie Meyer. I just kidnap them from time to time and keep them locked in the spare room. *coughcough* I am very grateful that she is kind enough to loan them to us. I promise to return them intact, though Carlisle might be a little grubby after his fall from grace. Nothing that a good cold shower, a confession and a bit of penance can't fix.

AN: This one is for rubyblue100. She started a new job and needed a little pick me up. We had batted the idea for this around and I decided to just bite the bullet and have a go. It's meant to be more of a comedy than anything else though it is lemon-y. Not nearly as much as some of my other Carlisle/Esme stories, but that is still the central focus. Quite a different look at Carlisle and I will freely admit that I had some fun at his expense. I'm sure that he will get even with me at some later point.

Many thanks to all of my readers. Hope you guys are still with me after this. o.O Thanks to Ruby, Cullen1007, Jasper1863Hale and edwardian1901 for helping me get through with the story and talking me into posting it. Of course I can't function without, nor forget, my beta, Splinter. I love all of you guys. *hugs*

The caramel haired woman sat in the back of the church obediently listening to the young priest recite the Liturgy as she followed his every movement with clear sparkling eyes. He wasn't like the elderly Father who had served their parish for what seemed like a century. Father Murphy had been one of those fire and brimstone types who specialized in frightening his flock into holding to the straight and narrow, but Father Cullen was very different.

He was fresh from the seminary and still had the exuberance of youth which fueled his passion and allowed him to believe that he could change the world. The Father preached of patience, love, understanding and forgiveness instead of focusing on the certainty of punishment that awaited each and every one of his straying sheep once their turn at this life was done.

Esme smiled to herself as she imagined just how untainted his spirit must be for him to believe his flock capable of the same level of goodness which he had attained. With his halo of thick pale golden hair and unique bright amber colored eyes, he looked every bit an angel. And when the sunlight came streaming in through the stained glass windows to caress his flawless pale skin, the young Father appeared to take on an otherworldly glow adding to his mystique.

With his strong soft voice echoing in her head carrying the promise of redemption, Esme knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that she was utterly damned. Focusing on the sleek muscular frame that lay hidden beneath his robes of black, she slowly slipped a hand under her skirt; managing only at the last moment to swallowed back a moan as she imagined his long sensitive fingers replacing hers.

With her shawl carelessly bunched up on her lap to disguise her activities, Esme's breath turned labored as her fingers slipped inside of her moist folds. Parting her legs a bit more, she worried the tiny nub of nerve endings that sent shock-waves of pleasure careening through her body while the novice priest's voice unknowingly fed the flames of her desire.

Firmly catching her bottom lip between her teeth, Esme silenced the rapture of her release while the Father was winding down his service. Panting softly, she closed her eyes while offering the appropriate responses to the Liturgy, but when she opened them again she found his golden brown eyes locked on hers and shuddered as a flush of red colored her cheeks. Quickly she looked away from his curious gaze as she prayed for the ability to disappear.

What had he seen? Surely he was oblivious to her carnal actives within the holy house that he presided over. She was making too much of this. There was no need to feel embarrassed and yet she couldn't slow her racing heart.

When he finally released his flock and after the last goodbyes were said, Carlisle strode back into the church only to find the vibrant beauty still sitting in the back pew.

Offering her a shy smiled, the young Father approached the pew and took a seat a respectable distance from her, but close enough that he could smell the floral perfume she wore.

"Miss Platt, I believe?"

"Why yes, Father," Esme answered a little taken back that he would know her name.

As if reading her mind, he averted his eyes as he bashfully admitted , "It was impossible for me not to commit your name to memory as your beauty causes you to stand out amongst the rest of the congregation."

Esme blushed brighter at the compliment, but found herself at a lost for words.

Noting that she was not inclined to speak, Carlisle forged ahead. Crossing his legs and resting his hands in his lap he offered an encouraging smile. "Is there something that I can do for you? Something that you wished to talk about?"

The woman felt her cheeks heat up even more as her mind swiftly considered all of the things that Father Cullen could do for her. I can't do this.

"There's no need to be shy, Miss Platt. I promise that I won't bite."

But I might. An imperceptible shiver ran the course of Esme's spine.

"Please, Father. It's Esme," she finally stated while gazing into the wonder that was the youthful Father's eyes.

"It is a pleasure to finally meet you, Esme. My given name is Carlisle. Feel free to use it if you wish."

He laid a hand against her forearm, but when the comforting gesture caused the young woman to look away, he quickly withdrew.

"Now that introductions are out of the way, what can I do to help?" The priest's eyes darkened slightly with concern as he carefully examined Esme. "I can tell that something is vexing you. Whatever it is, there is no need to shoulder your burden alone. God is always willing to lighten our loads; all we need to do is ask for his divine assistance."

Esme's mouth quite suddenly felt dry as though it was filled with cotton. Clearing her throat she forced herself to meet the Father's questioning eyes.

"I don't know what to...," she began before finding it impossible to articulate.

"What is it that you don't know?" When she shook her head in response, he scooted a little closer to allow him to gently take her hand in his. "You can tell me anything, Esme. God did not put me on this Earth to judge, so have no fear of that. My only wish is to help ease you in any way that I can. Please allow me to do so."

Swallowing hard, she bowed her head looking down at her hands and away to escape his breathtaking eyes before speaking in a small voice.

"Bless me Father, for I have sinned. It has been two months since my last confession."

Mistaking the girl's embarrassment for a heavy heart, Carlisle placed his hand lightly on Esme's shoulder. "I can not offer you anonymity at this point, but would you prefer to take this some place more private?" At his words he felt the poor penitent woman shudder with fearful remorse before she shook her head once again.

"Then may God be in your heart and on your lips so that you may freely and sincerely confess your sins."

"Father, I really don't think I can do this."

"Esme, my child, confession is good for your soul. It is obvious that you are troubled and that you want to confess to free yourself of this burden that you labor under." Ducking his head to glance at her face he spoke clearly and with great sincerity. "There is nothing that you can do which God cannot forgive, but you must admit your faults and ask for the forgiveness that you seek."

The woman shivered from the intensity of the priest's caring expression. Drawing a halting breath, she whispered softly,"Father, I have had impure thoughts." At this admittance, Esme cheeks flush the brightest red that Carlisle had ever seen.

Biting the inside of his cheek to control his amusement, the Father coaxed gently, "Is that all, child? Is that what is truly troubling your mind so harshly?"

"In part."

"Surely, you don't wish for just a partial reconciliation with God."

"No." Gazing deep into those topaz eyes, Esme felt her heart flutter.

"Then do not hold back anything. The Lord already knows what sins weigh down your heart and soul, Esme. Now he is just waiting for you to admit to them so that he can forgive."

Closing her eyes tightly, Esme rapidly admitted, "I ...I have abused myself while having sexual thoughts about a man." Snapping her eyes open, she found herself faced with a mixed expression of curiosity and compassion touched with a mild case of embarrassment, but wholly lacking the disapproval that she expected to find. "I couldn't stop myself, Father."

Carlisle coughed to cover his discomfort then cleared his throat before softly trying to offer the poor soul the counsel that she sought.

"It's alright. In many circles within our faith mastur..." An aggravating tickle in his throat caused him to cough again as he pressed a fisted hand against his lips while ignoring the flush of heat which pinked his cheeks. "Excuse me. As I was saying, many no longer consider masturbation a sin or at least not a mortal one."

"Do you see it as a sinful act?"

The young Father ran a hand through his thick fair hair nervously. Why was this discussion making him so anxious? It wasn't as if he hadn't been through this sort of thing before and he knew that he could look forward to covering the matter over and over again through the course of his lifetime. There was no cause for apprehensiveness. His parishioners looked to him as a source of calm. It would not do for him to become frazzled during such a simple confession.

Inhaling deeply, Carlisle nodded. "Yes, I believe in the Church's view that masturbation is a sinful act. Sex is a means of procreation which pulls double duty as an expression of love between a married couple. It is the ultimate gift that you and your future husband will bestow upon one another. It is an act of totally and selflessly giving yourself to another in a way that binds the two of you more closely together through intimate love."

The Father swallowed hard as he was drawn deep into the woman's rich warm brown eyes.

"Self pleasure is just that; it is an act of selfishness. It belittles the depth of meaning that is interwoven in the act of sexual relations. It is purely for your own pleasure. It may be physically satisfying for the moment, but it is completely devoid of meaning. It lacks love and lessens the value of the act when you are finally married.

Also, you admit that you fantasize while pleasuring yourself; as many, if not most, do. We do not need to physically act to commit a sin. We can sin in thought as well as deed, as I'm sure you are already aware. You may as well just go have intercourse with this man outside of marriage, because you have already committed the sin in your heart."

Esme cocked her head to the side as she considered the Father's words carefully.

"So you are encouraging me to sleep with a man out of wedlock?"

"No, of course not." Carlisle's eyes grew wide as he quickly reviewed his previous speech to try to find the point at which he had gone so wrong as to have given Esme such an idea. Suddenly he closed his eyes and grimaced at his verbal misstep while giving a slight shake of his head.

"That didn't come out right at all, did it?"

For the first time, the woman smiled brightly at him, clearly amused.

"It's alright, Father. I understand what you're trying to say." She noticed as he sighed in relief. "Have you..."

His golden eyes turned back towards her causing a rush of increased nervousness.

"Um. I was just wondering if you have ever fallen from grace just a bit. I'm sure that it must get lonely sometimes and we all have very human drives; even the most pious."

Carlisle's eyes once again widened as his hand unconsciously wove through his hair.

"Confessions remain a private matter between the penitent and his or her confessor; yours as well as mine. I'm sorry, but I'm not comfortable sharing my failings. I hope you understand."

Esme nodded quickly. "I do. It was just a thought anyway." She glanced down and away.

"What thought?"

Without looking up, she softly admitted, "I was thinking that a selfless act is better than a selfish one."

"Selflessness is always encouraged," he agreed with a nod.

"Then wouldn't it be better ... If you were inclined to the occasional bout of selfish fulfillment, wouldn't it be better to have someone else lend a hand?"

Carlisle bore a look of confusion until her meaning became astonishing clear. "Miss Platt!"

"Father, I most recently committed my sin here under this roof and the man of my fantasies is sitting beside me."

She slid closer to him until her thigh rested against his knee, only to have him skitter away towards the end of the pew.

Undaunted, Esme inched closer. "Father. Carlisle. Have you ever known a woman's touch?"

"That would be Father Cullen, Miss Platt, and no, I have not."

Esme gave him an odd look. "A man's touch then?"

"No. I have taken a vow of celibacy. I am a man of the cloth."

"That's just it, Father." A spark lit up the woman's eyes. "You are a Man of the cloth. You are a man before you are a priest. Men have needs and desires."

"I have a desire to remain pure in the eyes of God."

"Didn't you just tell me that there is no sin so great which God cannot forgive?" Esme reach out to touch the young priest sending him careening off the end of the pew to land with a hard thud on the carpeted aisle.

She was kneeling at his side before he could rise.

"Shh, Father, " she whispered as she placed a finger against his lips. "Think about what I am offering you for just a moment. How can you counsel others on something that you've never experienced? How can you be fully aware of what you are giving up; of the sacrifice that you are making for God, if you've never indulged in pleasure? I am giving you a chance to become a better vessel of God's will." Staring provocatively into his 'deer in headlights' expression, Esme could not suppress a giggle.

"Take a journey with this simple sinner, Father. See it as a learning experience if you must. God will forgive and welcome you home like a prodigal son. The Church does not consider the rule of clerical celibacy to be an unchangeable dogma, but instead as a rule to which exceptions are admitted. What better reason for that exception than the making of a more knowledgeable priest who can better relate to his flock?"

She gazed into the swirling depths of his golden brown eyes as she brushed a lock of hair away from his furrowed brow.

"They say that the damaged counselor also makes the best counselor. I'm not looking to damage you at all, Father. I just want to open your eyes to what's around you."


Esme rolled her eyes. "Hardly, Father Cullen. I'm just a flawed mortal like yourself. Of course if I were a succubus, you could certainly do worse than being seduced by me. Pope Sylvester II got to the top with the help of succubi, or didn't you learn that at the seminary?"

Carlisle turned his head away as she leaned down to kiss him, but Esme cupped his cheek in her hand and coaxed him into facing her.

"Wouldn't you like to find your way to the top one day? Allow yourself to be human just this once. Experience what it really means to give of yourself and have another reciprocate in kind. The exchange of pleasure is an unselfish act; we've already established that. It is the Law of Man that denies you pleasure, Father. God wants you to be happy and you will do no harm if you accept my guidance, as I have accepted yours."

"It is unselfish, but it is still sinful."

"Only by papal decree."

"No. Even putting my calling to the side, sex outside of marriage is sinful. This is no more than lust which is a mortal corruption."

Esme drew back with a smirk as she caught his eyes. "Then marry me and be done with it. Marry me and we shall no longer be committing sin."

Carlisle looked away from the temptress in annoyance.

"Father, ask yourself what is the greater sin; to break a ruling set by men or to flaunt the gifts that God has granted you? God does not want our suffering. God wants our praise and devotion. The bible tells us that man is created in God's image. By worshiping the body of another human-being, are we not thereby also worshiping God and offering our most sincerest thanks and praise by pleasing his greatest creation? How can that not please God?

Life and love are miracles that we should be grateful to God for. When you deny yourself and reject those who want nothing more than to love you, you are not suffering to purify your soul; you are turning your back on God's gift to you. I don't know about you, Father, but I find that lack of gratitude to be a grievous sin."

"A priest is meant to be dead to the world and only alive to God."

"The dead cannot continue to teach the living. You must live life to know what pitfalls lay in wait for your flock. That is the only way to protect them and lead them home."

Carlisle closed his eyes as he tried to ignore the logic of the seductress, but after several more moments of resistance he began to feel his barriers falling. Slowly the rigidity left his body as he opened himself up and became more malleable to his guide's experienced hands.

"That's it, Father. Relax and let me take you where you need to go." Esme placed her lips gently against his neck as she unbuttoned the collar of his cassock and pulled the white tab free. "There, now you are just a man in the eyes of God. A man free to experience all of the wonders that this life has to offer so that you may truly appreciate what God has given you."

Esme threw her leg over the priest to straddle his hips as she began to work on the many buttons of his robes.

"Unwrapping presents is always so much fun. Let's just see what's hiding underneath here."

Carlisle turned his head to the side and closed his eyes, clearly still uncomfortable with his predicament.

"I shall endure this to appease you, but I think it would be much wiser to take this to the rectory."

The woman halted her progress as a questioning look overtook her beautiful face.

"Isn't the church door secure?"

"A church's door should never be locked. It is a sanctuary to all who are in need."

"Hmm, "she tapped her finger thoughtfully against her chin. "That could prove problematic, Father." After thinking for a few more moments a smile blossomed on her lips. "I know just the place."

Jumping up, she hauled Carlisle to his feet and began leading him up the aisle.

A sudden fear struck the Godly priest and he came to a screeching halt as he dug his heels into the carpet pulling her back.

"You may defile me, a simple common place sinner, but you will not defile the Holy Sanctuary," he hissed in a low yet forceful whisper.

Esme rolled her eyes as she tugged a little to get him moving forward once again. "I'm not planning on fucking you on the altar, if that's what you're worried about. Please, give me a little more credit than that. I want you to experience Earthly pleasure, but I'm not looking to damn our souls to hell."

Though still skeptical, the Father warily allowed himself to be led once more.

As they neared the pulpit, Esme abruptly veered to the right and yanked Carlisle down on the floor of the choir box.

Rolling him onto his back and straddling him once more, she brushed the Father's hair back before returning to the task of undressing him layer by tantalizing layer.

"Now this is better, Father. Should someone come in, they won't expect to find you here."

"Unless the choir comes in to practice."

"Is that scheduled for today?"

"No, but..."

Esme silenced him by pressing her lips to his. He continued to offer resistance, but her insistent probing tongue eventually secured safe passage into the moist warm confines of his mouth.

As her tongue touched his, Carlisle felt an electric shock shoot through his body that caused him to shiver. Experimentally, he pushed against the intruder until he found his tongue sampling the sweetness of the woman's lips before he dipped inside of her drawing a soft moan. With a jerk, he pulled away and looked at her apologetically.

"I'm sorry. Did I do something wrong?"

The caramel haired beauty sat up a little as she smiled at his innocence.

"You could use a little practice, but you didn't do anything wrong."

"Oh." He blushed brightly. "I was afraid that I had caused you some discomfort."

A giggle bubbled within Esme, but she fought hard to suppress it fearing that he would think she was laughing at him.

"Not at all. You're fine, Carlisle. Just follow my lead." She brushed her hand lightly against his cheek. "There really is no right or wrong way so don't over think what's going on. Just let it happen."

He sighed in exasperation as she encouraged him to lift his shoulders to allow her to work the robe off of his body.

Catching his face between her hands, Esme stared into his eyes. "God would not have made sex pleasurable, if he didn't want you to experience it."

Carlisle caught a whiff of a musky scent that caused a stirring in his groin and he shifted his hip to try to relieve the building pressure.

Sitting up, the priest suddenly admitted, "I don't know how..."

"You never at least read about sex? No sex ed classes growing up? Don't you watch movies, Father?"

Carlisle growled in frustration.

"I know how everything works, I just don't know ... how everything works."

Esme narrowed her eyes in thought. "You don't know what to do to get there."

The young Father huffed out another sigh. "Exactly."

The woman shook her head as a mischievous grin curled her lips. Gently pushing him back down on his back, she made quick work of the buttons on his black shirt.

"You worry too much, Father. There is nothing more natural. Trust your instincts and do what feels right." Running her hand over the white t-shirt with the faded Mighty Mouse graphic that hugged the man's chest, Esme muttered almost to herself, "And I would say that getting rid of this feels right just about now. Mighty Mouse. Really?"

"You don't like Mighty Mouse?"

Esme tugged the shirt over his head before glancing back into his hurt eyes.

"Mighty Mouse is awesome," she conceded. "I just didn't except to find him under your robes."

Trailing kisses across his chest, Esme worked her way back up his body to reclaim his lips while her hand slipped beneath the waistband of his black cotton trousers.

Carlisle closed his eyes and lost himself in the warmth of her kisses. Giving into the euphoria created by each touch of her lips against his skin, the Father found himself wanting more. Running his hands through the hair on either side of her temples, he pulled her face towards his, hungry for the sweetness of her tongue once again, but when her invading hand closed around him, Carlisle startled.

Releasing her, he quickly sat up while trying to brush her hand away.

Before she could catch herself, Esme released a heavy sigh. "You are not making this easy, Father."

"I'm sorry." He bowed his head and the woman noticed him trembling ever so slightly.

The physical verification of his fear caused Esme's frustration to leave her as she stroked his golden hair.

"It's okay, but you have to relax. This should be fun, you know?" When he continued to hide his face, she grasped his chin firmly and tilted his head back. Looking him in the eye she spoke in a firm quiet gentle voice. "You are going to lay back down and not move, regardless of how much you want to. You are going to have to show me just a little bit of that endless faith that I know you have."

Carlisle's breath caught in his chest before he forced it out in a halting exhalation. Finally he nodded his consent and laid down with a sigh.

"Rest your hands comfortably at the small of your back."

Confusion shown in his clear amber eyes as he raised a questioning brow.

"If you're laying on them, they can't get in the way."

The Father huffed quietly as he wiggled around to comply with her instructions. With a touch of annoyance in his tone he inquired, "Happy?"

"Very much so." Esme offered a radiant smile. "Now close your eyes and let you mind go blank."

"Like meditation."

The woman simply nodded.

With Carlisle settling down, Esme swiftly removed his shoes then ran her hands up his legs before making short work of the closures on his slacks.

"Lift your hips just a touch."

Carlisle swallowed hard and his body became rigid at her instructions.

"Please, Father."

Taking a slow deep breath he rolled his hips forward giving Esme just a few precious seconds to whisk his pants and shorts down in one quick motion.

Sitting back on her heels, the woman took inventory of the beautiful sight that laid trembling before her and beamed with pleasure.

"Mmm." She purred softly. "God must have been very pleased with himself when he made you, Father." A pink glow warmed Carlisle's cheeks as he tried to close his eyes even tighter.

Very lightly stroking her fingers along his inner thigh and up over his hip, Esme explored her treasure.

"You are without a doubt made in the image of God. I know that there is no such thing as a perfect man, but you come damn close."

Carlisle whimpered quietly as her lips followed the reverse of the path that her fingers had taken. Soft barely noticeable kisses peppered his stomach becoming more forceful as they grazed his hip until she could no longer resist the temptation to gentle nip his inner thigh.

The priest stopped breathing for a few seconds before Esme reminded him of his need for air.

"Carlisle." The voice was a whisper against his ear causing him to jump. "You are beautiful. Hiding yourself away from the world is a much greater sin than anything that we are about to do."

Forcibly taking control of his mouth she kissed him long and deep while her hand work his cock with firm slow strokes.

Carlisle groaned in response to the bombardment of new sensations racking his body.

Esme pulled back slowly from their kiss until he reluctantly relinquished her lips and gasped. With a ghost of a grin and a sparkle in her eye, she whispered, "Did I do something wrong? I didn't cause you any discomfort, did I?"

The Father whined as he shook his head.

The woman giggled as she slid down his body, leaving a trail of kisses in her wake.

She cupped his balls in her free hand and massaged them while leaning over the shimmering head of his cock.

"Carlisle. Carlisle open your eyes and look at me."

Completely helpless to ignore her command, his eyes fluttered open until they gazed into hers.

Without breaking eye contact she slowly swirled her tongue up and down his shaft then moistened her lips before drawing him in towards the back of her throat.

The erotic vision of witnessing himself vanishing within the beautiful woman's hot wet mouth, coupled with the flicker of her talented tongue and suction proved far too much for the young novice. Within seconds thick spurts of cum coated Esme's tongue and raced down her throat while the priest's eyes glazed over and he moaned in ecstasy.

Sitting up next to his hip, Esme wiped at the corners of her mouth and smiled sweetly down at the breathlessly panting priest. "Now seriously, Father, how can something that feels so good, has a healthy benefit of relaxing the body, and causes no harm at all to any one, be a sin?"

Ignoring her question, Carlisle quickly closed his eyes and tucked his chin against his chest bashfully. "Again, I find myself having to apologize."

"Whatever for?"

"I should have had more control. It usually takes... those times where I've... I generally have more stamina." He rolled away from her and laid on his side fearing mockery in her countenance. "I can only imagine what you think of me."

Placing a delicate hand on his shoulder, Esme rolled him back over.

"I think that you are a man, just like every other man. Much more handsome than most, but still a man." Her voice was soft. "Carlisle, there is a huge difference between going it solo and having a partner. I was not expecting a marathon, but I would like some relief of my own while we wait for you to get your second wind."

Carlisle looked up at her from the flat of his back with an expression of regret for his feelings of incompetence.

Esme smirked. "I'll teach you. Give me your hand."

"I can't. I'm laying on them." He quickly tucked them back under his back before allowing himself a playful grin to which the woman shook her head.

"Give me." She reached under him for his wrist, but he made every effort to thwart her plans.

Finally securing a grip on his forearm, Esme tugged his arm out from beneath him before swatting him lightly on the hip. "Father Cullen, behave yourself."

"I would say it's a little late for that, don't you think?"

Esme noticed a slight sadness reflected in his topaz eyes which contrasted with the gentle smile on his face. Leaning over him she kissed him gentle before throwing a leg over him to straddle his hips.

"Relax your hand. That's it," she whispered as she touched his fingers with her own. "Just mirror the motions of my hand."

She guided his hand between her legs and, closing her eyes, she quivered at his touch. Esme moaned quietly while she led his thumb to circle her clit with gradual increasing pressure. Leaning into his touch, she opened her eyes slightly only to notice his wide eyed shocked expression. Lacing her fingers through his, she halted his hand momentarily.

"What's wrong, Carlisle?"

"Y..You aren't wearing any undergarments," he muttered so softly that she had to strain to hear him.

With a giggle, she collapsed on his chest.

"Father, I did tell you where I most recently committed my sin. There is much to say for ease of access. Panties only get in the way."

"Do you forgo...? Do you do this often? Do other people?"

"I can not speak for anyone else, but I haven't worn undies to church since you took to the pulpit." Esme grinned while reaching up with her free hand to gently caress his face.

Carlisle blinked rapidly in shock and was just about to continue with another question when a voice called out from near the church door.

The priest froze and all color drained from his face as he keyed in on the voice.

"It's William. He takes care of the grounds. What are we going to do?"

Seeing panic beginning to over take the man, Esme released his hand and untangled herself from his body. "Relax, Father. I'll take care of it." She kissed his cheek before whispering in his ear, "The fear of being caught only heightens the excitement."

With a soft pat to his cheek, she stood up and straightened her clothes as she whispered the order of "stay put and keep out of sight" before she left him to go greet the intruder.

"Esme. Esme Anne, I would like a word with you, if you please," Carlisle called out in tone that was a bit more demanding than he intended as he stared at the neatly bound manuscript in utter shock.

I know that I was awkward the first time we made love, but I was NEVER that bad. Where does she come up with these things? Oh my God, what if I really was that inept? I know that I was inexperienced, but come on. No, I couldn't have been that bad... though we did end up having quite a number of training sessions.

Still focused on his wife's composition, the patriarch let out a groan. Esme Anne, you had better have a good explanation for this, little Miss.

Unable to continue reading, he placed the sheaf of papers back on his desk allowing the cover to close of its own accord while his mind continued to reel. Leaning back in his chair, Carlisle pinched the bridge of his nose as he drew slow deep breaths of cool air to help chill his venom.

My treasured mate must have lost her mind. That is the only logical explanation for her having written this in the first place and then leaving it on the desk for me to find. If this is what she concocts while alone ...A priest? That's just... It's... A PRIEST? No. There are some lines that should not be crossed, Mrs. Cullen. Don't you think that we are in enough trouble with God already?

To Carlisle's mortification, he found that Esme's writing still had an effect on him. Shifting uncomfortably in his chair, he adjusted himself before releasing a frustrated sigh.

I can't believe this. What in the hell is wrong with me now?

"Esme Anne Cullen, I'm still waiting. There is a matter which we need to discuss, young lady."

Within seconds he heard light footfalls come up the stairs and stop at the study door, but the scent that wafted in was not what he expected.


The door cracked open and his pixie daughter's head poked in. She wore a bright smile which immediately lightened Carlisle's mood in a way that only Alice was capable of.

"May I come in, Daddy?"

"Of course, Princess."

Opening the door fully, Alice glided in carrying a parcel in her hands.

"Momma dragged Edward and Emmett with her to the garden center a little while ago. She should be back soon though." She watched as some of the tension abandoned her father once he realized that his mate wasn't simply ignoring him. "This just came for you." She indicated the package with a nod while holding it out for Carlisle to take.

"I figured I would run it up and let you know about mom."

"Thank you, Sweetheart." He took the box and shook it lightly. "I wonder what this is. I don't recall ordering anything."

Alice's bright honey colored eyes danced as she grinned happily.

"We are all thinking about heading into Port Angeles to catch a movie. Would you and mom like to come along?"

Tearing the brown shipping paper off of the box, Carlisle shook his head. "As much fun as that would be, your mother and I need to have a little chat in private."

"Then it's a good thing that you'll have the whole house to yourselves." Alice bounced around to her father's side of the desk and kissed him on the cheek. "Just don't do anything that Jazzy and I wouldn't do."

Giving Carlisle a wink, she was headed out the door before he could reply.

"Have fun, Daddy and don't get too hung up on silly stuff," were the pixie's parting words as she disappeared back down the stairs.

Carefully lifting the lid of the box, the doctor found an envelope addressed to him resting on top of the tissue which concealed the contents of the package.

Extracting the fine parchment paper, he unfolded the note.


I have been missing you terribly over the last few months. Between my classes and your work schedule, we have had precious little time together as of late. Alice has arranged for us to have a quiet evening home alone for a change. I'm hoping that you will be in the mood for a little fun.

By now you will have read my story. What can I say except that the Devil makes work for idle hands and late at night mine have been idling quite a bit. Perhaps you can find a better occupation for them and guide me towards the path of salvation. After all, Carlisle, I need your blessings for I have most certainly sinned.

All my love.

Always and forever yours,


Rubbing his eyes as he placed the note on the desktop, Carlisle took a moment before parting the tissue to reveal his wife's offering. There nestled in the white paper laid all the trappings of a priest and shrouding the heavy black cassock was the patriarch's very own well worn Mighty Mouse t-shirt that Emmett had given him long ago.

Sighing again, he shook his head as he withdrew his phone from his pocket while muttering softly,"Esme, what am I to do with you?"

Glancing back down at her phone, Esme re-read the text from her husband.

I am prepared to hear your confession and will expect you to make a good act of contrition.

"Somehow, Father, I don't think you really are prepared for my confession, but we shall see." Esme giggled as she shook her head in clear delight.

She had been reluctant to even suggest the evening's roleplay theme, mainly due to Carlisle's youth, but the temptation over the last few weeks had become far too great.

A few nights ago, when Alice had made the suggestion of writing a story and leaving it for Carlisle to find, Esme had rejected the very idea. Later, alone in her room, she found that she was unable to get the curious idea out of her head. The more it wore on her mind the more she began to embrace the pixie's plan. Her clever clairvoyant daughter had used the same tactic a few times with her mate and she assured her mother that the effort was well worth the outcome. Esme had finally reached the point where she was willing to try.

The moment that the matriarch began to commit words to paper, Alice had a favorable vision that she had been only too excited to share. Together the two women worked in secret seeing to the flawlessness of their plans. Cleric clothing had been ordered and Esme's writing class at the Junior college had given her the opportunity to explore the dynamics of creating her masterpiece which only this morning she had nervously left on Carlisle's desk with his patient reports. Everything had fallen so nicely into place and now Esme found herself driving home along the lonely road that wound through the woods with a mischievous grin on her face as she prepared to meet her parish priest.

"Look out, Father Carlisle because your personal sinner is on her way."

Pressing the accelerator harder, the woman raced towards home; to her waiting husband and to the promise of a night filled with sweet salvation.