A/N- For those of you who are reading my reunion series- yes I am stalling! ;) Sorry I'm taking a while, but I will have it up soon. Hope y'all enjoy this drabble! Might be a little confusing (Sherlock types faster than John, after all, so he's often a step ahead). I'm not sure how long some text messages can be, but by the 160 character limit on my phone, some of John's texts go over, so they break into two parts. (To avoid confusion!) Tell me what y'all think! ;D
"Do something about it."
"This is something, John. Entertain me. SH"
"Because I'm bored. SH"
"What is it with you and your brother's initial complex? As if either of you need to boost your self-importance. I think I'll start doing it, just to show you h"
"How belittling you are. JW"
"Needs, not need. My boredom increases with every passing second. Soon it will escalate to a point where I am no longer responsible for my actions. SH"
"Thats my problem… Why?"
"That's. Because I'm alone in the living room and my knife is on the mantel. Entertain me. SH"
"Sherlock, you tear up that sofa again, and you will pay WITH YOUR LIFE. JW"
"You think that typing in all caps will somehow validate your threats? I know you're not that angry, John. SH"
"I WILL hold you responsible. JW"
"Try to keep up, John. SH"
"You think that because I haven't murdered you, I don't have plans to? JW"
"I am considering the quickest way to demolish a piece of furniture. SH"
"Sherlock. Do. Not. Touch. The. Sofa. JW"
"I'm standing over your chair, John. SH"
"Touch that chair, and I WILL kill you. John Bloody-angry Watson"
"You told me it was Hamish. SH"
"Playing stupid really doesn't suit your. JW"
"My what? SH"
"Doesn't suit my what? SH"
"I meant YOU, you bloody idiot. JW"
"You're the idiot if you don't see how one letter can change the meaning entirely. SH"
"In fact you're the idiot anyway. SH"
"What's your middle name? JW"
"It just strikes me now that I don't even know. JW"
"Are your eyes going, as well? 'John' is my middle name, since you're so ridiculously interested. It's Sherlock John Holmes, to be perfectly clear. SH"
"I can hear you laughing, you know. SH"
"Sherlock 'JOHN' Holmes! Wow. Your parents will never cease to amaze me. JW"
"Why does it amaze you that two people would settle on the- then- sixth most popular male name in Britain to give their son? SH"
"Because I'm pretty sure that no one else on this PLANET is named 'Sherlock'. lol JW"
"You can 'laugh out loud' to your heart's content, John. There's no name more ridiculous than 'Hamish.' SH"
"How else have my parents amazed you? SH"
"That's too long a silence, John, even for you. SH"
"I'm trying to think of a nice way to say 'your the strangest person I've ever met.' JW"
"You're. Your texting is riddled with errors today. SH"
"You're the strangest person I have ever met. JW"
"Btw, I posted 'The Muskrat Routine' this morning. Should I bother asking if you read? JW"
"Better things to do. SH"
"Then why have you been complaining of boredom? JW"
"Not bored anymore. SH"
"Has my error-ridden texting entertained you? JW"
"Sherlock, please tell me that isn't smoke I smell."
"You weren't particularly attached to that holiday sweater, were you, John? SH"
20 minutes later
"I know you can hear me yelling for you. Come help me clean up your mess. JW"
"Sherlock, stop being a big kicked puppy. Come out of your room. JW"
"You were hiding in your room earlier. SH"
"I was trying to take a nap- something you're boredom wouldn't allow. JW"
"Your. What's there to clean? SH"
"Come into the living room and find out. JW"
"You're angry with me. SH"
"You're perceptive. JW"
"It's only a sweater, John. SH"
"Correction- it 'was' a sweater. You set it on fire remember? JW"
"The thing was ghastly. I did you a favor. SH"
"Perhaps now you will have success in dating. SH"
"It wasn't ghastly. JW"
"It was. SH"
"I could 'have success dating' if you wouldn't scare away all the women I date. JW"
"Seriously I want to get this cleaned up before Mrs H gets in tonight. JW"
"She won't notice. SH"
"A big patch of carpet is covered in the ashes of my sweater, Sherlock. I THINK SHE'S GOING TO NOTICE. JW"
"Don't raise your voice at me. SH"
"I hoovered, but there's still a big dark spot. JW"
"You tell me this, why? SH"
"So, smart-ass, tell me the best way to get rid of it. JW"
"Replace the carpet. SH"
"Your funny. JW"
"You're- and it wasn't intended as a joke. SH"
"Good, because it wasn't funny. JW"
"You are a complex creature, John Watson. Feel free to take that how you will. SH"
"Sod it, Sherlock. JW"
"Is that your feeble attempt to have the last word in? SH"
"Why DID you set my sweater on fire? JW"
"To study the details of the outcome. SH"
"On the sweater or the carpet? JW"
"On you. And you've been quite entertaining, John. :) SH"
"…The sad thing is that I'm not sure whether to be more disturbed by the fact that you burnt my sweater on purpose, or by what I imagine is you're first-ever smi"
"Ley face. JW"
"Damn it, Sherlock- get YOUR lazy ass in the living room now- or do you want Mr H. to kick us both out? JW"
"My instructions to you are these- control your temper and type with greater care. SH"
"Since it hasn't yet come to your attention, you missed the 's' in Mrs. See now how one missing letter changes the meaning entirely? SH"
"Answer your phone. SH"
"Or come speak to me in person. SH"
"Sod it, John. SH"
"I'm still bored, John."