A/N: This has been on my 'to publish' list for weeks now, but I haven't been able to put any finishing touches on it until now. It's a songfic to P!nk's 'Try', which I highly recommend listening to while you read this. I think this song embodies the ItaNaruSasu angst bromantic triangle well. I originally had the lyrics for the song posted, but was told I would have to take them down for copyright purposes. I still recommend listening to the song if you're going to read this, though! :)
This is going to contain some spoilers (mostly Sasuke related) if you're not up to speed with the newest manga chapters.
Summary: The relationships between Naruto, Sasuke, and Itachi aren't what anyone would call healthy, let alone normal. Pain and love go hand in hand, when it comes to the bonds between them. And yet...they still try. Because in the end, what else can they really do? Songfic to P!nk's 'Try'
Before, Itachi had often wondered what Sasuke was doing. If he was eating properly, sleeping, taking care of himself. He knew, by all means, that he had lost the right to know those things after what he had put Sasuke through, and that those were all mostly trifles in Sasuke's complicated life now anyway...but he couldn't help it. He would still sit and stare out into the night, seeing not the stars or scenery, but the ingrained image of his smiling baby brother.
Murderer. Traitor. Evil. He could accept all of that - from the village he loved, from his former friends and comrades, even from Sasuke - so long as it kept up the ruse. So long as it kept his little brother safe. He didn't care what it took, and how many lies he would have to tell, he would do it. He would lie to his friends and lovers and family, if that's what was necessary. For his little brother, he would do it.
He'd stopped asking why years ago. Why his clan, why his parents, why his village, why Sasuke, why him, why it had to be this way. There were never any answers anyway. Really, it didn't matter why, it just mattered that this was the way it had to be. His own pain wasn't even a factor.
He would keep Sasuke safe, no matter what the cost. He would prevent his home from falling to ruin, no matter what the cost.
Even if he had to cut down his own clan, his family.
No matter how much pain he was in, how sick he was, how blind he became, it didn't matter.
He would hold on.
For Konoha, and for Sasuke...he would try. Even if it killed him
Sasuke had spent years hating Itachi. He had sold his soul, emptying it of all emotions but hate, years ago. On that night when his brother had taken everything he cared about from him, and forced him to relive it over and over again. He thought he couldn't possibly feel anymore pain, that it couldn't get any worse than that.
But Itachi had lied, all for him. He'd loved Sasuke, and had given away everything, for him. It shouldn't have been possible to feel that much pain, and anguish, and love for someone you had vowed to hate your whole life, someone you had sworn to kill. Someone you had killed. But it was.
He'd loved Itachi more than anything. If you had asked him as a child who he loved the most, he would have said, without a doubt or pause, Itachi. His answer would be the same now. Who had given those bastards the right to play God with his brother's life? How was that right?
He'd avenge his brother, and make those who did this to him pay.
He'd set the village he had once called home ablaze, and watch it burn to ashes himself if that's what it took.
He wanted his brother to be happy, to be proud of him. No, what he really wanted was Itachi alive and happy beside him, but that was impossible. What Itachi wanted was for the village to live and prosper.
He hated them. He hated what they had done to Itachi, but...if that's what his brother wanted...
He would defend Konoha. He didn't like it, but for Itachi...he would try.
No matter how many times Naruto had told Sakura that it would all be fine, that things would go back to the way they had been, deep down he knew he was lying, to her and to himself. Everyone else could see it - hell, even Sakura could see it, while he continued to lie to himself. Sasuke wasn't coming back the same person he had left, if he came back at all. It would never go back to the way things were. It couldn't.
He could put on a tough front for everyone else. He could lie and pretend, but it didn't matter. He still had the nightmares, and woke up in tears. He'd given Sakura a hard time for crying, but really, he wasn't much better. Crying wouldn't bring Sasuke back. Telling himself that didn't stop the dreams, though.
He gave it his best, 110%. Deep down, he knew it wasn't healthy, his fixation on his friend. His 'former' friend, according to everyone else - Sasuke included. He was holding onto Sasuke by a thread, but it was a thread he would cling to for his life. Because nothing else mattered. Sasuke was the first thing he thought about when he woke up in the morning, and the last thing he thought about before he went to sleep.
Because the hole Sasuke had torn into his chest that day at the Valley of the End wouldn't heal until he had brought his friend back. The empty, lonely hole that made it hard to breathe when he wasn't busy, alone with his thoughts.
He would bring Sasuke back. No matter what.
He would take a thousand beatings and more if he had to, it didn't matter.
Even if he lost every one of his limbs, he'd crawl if he had to.
Until he brought Sasuke back, he wouldn't die. He wouldn't fall.
Sasuke was his family. He'd bring him back, even if it killed him.
Because he would never forgive himself if he didn't try.
The bonds between brothers is complicated; one does not need to be related by blood to feel it.
Despite one's best efforts to break them, the bonds will still be there, be it through hate or love.
For three individuals in particular, the web of these bonds are vast, extending beyond that of love and hate and loyalty.
For these bonds with one another, they would do anything.
For each other...they would never stop trying.
A/N: Meh, I got a little dramatic at the end there, didn't I? I had the most trouble with Sasuke's POV, which I wrote and rewrote again and again, right up until now. He's a very difficult character for me. Speaking of, who else had a 'WTF?!' moment after chapter 627? *(Do not keep reading if you don't want to be spoiled)* Now I can't wait to see the look on Naruto's face when four zombie Hokage (one of which is his father), a supposedly dead Sannin, a member of team hawk that's supposed to be in lockdown, a very terrified prospective Mist Swordsman, Juugo toting a half-dead Anko, and Sasuke all show up on the battlefield to assist. Yeah...that's gonna be interesting, to say the least.
Thanks for reading. :)