"You have placed Zack Ryder in the hospital too many times, Shawn. Hunter." Vince McMahon said as he nodded at each man, stern frown in place as he glared at them. "So, I have issued a restraining order."
"What?" Both members of DX exclaimed, jumping out of their seats.
"You cannot be anywhere near him as long as there is not another superstar or a close friend. If you are, he has my permission to not only attack, but also call the police and they; in turn; have permission to use drastic measures."
"You're insane, old man!" Shawn yelled as he slammed his hands against the desk, getting up and pointing at the boss as he glared in an insane manner. "Zack needs cheering up and who's better to do it other than Degeneration X?"
Vince only stared at him in an unamused manner, then looked at Triple H, who was chuckling quietly at Shawn's face. "You understand, don't you, Paul?"
Hunter sighed and nodded, getting up and placing his hand on Shawn's chest to step him from flipping out in the boss's office. "We understand, Vince. No bothering Zack anymore. Got it."
"Good boy." Vince nodded, then waved them away, returning to his paper work.
Shawn's mouth hung open as Hunter pushed him out of the room, surprised at what had just happened. As soon as they were a few doors down from the office, Hunter stopped and smirked at Shawn, all the while the older stared at him in shock.
"Are you serious, Hunt? We're going to stop helping out Zack now? He's our helper-slash-elf thing!" Shawn exclaimed, ready to flip out.
Hunter only stared at him for a few seconds, then smacked him upside the head, and as Shawn whined about, spoke. "Shawn, the kid needs a bit of time away from our insanity. I mean, just a few days ago he was just fist pumping himself into oblivion and next thing he knew he had DX and Kaitlyn making him throw dolls at people."
"Those were action figures..." Shawn mumbled, glaring up in a childish manner at Hunter.
The taller only stared at him, and said, "If kids can hug them comfortably, no matter what you say, they are plush toys and that equals doll in my mind. Now, how about we go find a new target before Daddy Dearest kicks out of here."
Shawn cocked his head to the side, wondering why Hunter would say that. "Why would he kick us out? We didn't do anything to him."
"SON OF A BITCH!"
Suddenly there was an explosion that came from Mr. McMahon's office, the door flying away with paint dust following. Shawn stared with his mouth wide open, all the while Hunter chuckled evilly.
"I rigged his desk. Awesome, right?"
"DEGENERATION X!" Vince yelled at the top of his lungs, stumbling out of the room completely caked in green, gray, and purple paint.
"Shit! Run, Shawn! He's gotten lose!" Hunter grabbed Shawn's arm and started running off, the smaller man only staring as Vince tried to run after them, only to collapse and start coughing violently.
"Hunter, is he going to be all right?" Shawn asked as the fallen McMahon grew smaller and smaller, all the while Hunter shrugged.
"How am I supposed to know? Now let's go start plotting."
"So, which Superstar can we recruit?" Hunter asked as he, Shawn, Hornswoggle, and Kaitlyn all sat in a dark room, the only light there shining on the round table where they had papers and pens in front of them.
"Maybe John Cena?" Kaitlyn offered, only to get a grunt of approval from 'Swoggle.
It was funny to see the Superstars together, especially because of the way they were dressed. Almost as if Halloween had thrown up on them. Kaitlyn was wearing a genetic hot secretary outfit, complete with the thick glasses and hair in a bun, all the while Hornswoggle sat in an adorable version of a cowboy costume.
Shawn and Hunter were both wearing their DX gear, but along with that, had pink scattered all over them, on Kaitlyn's insistence.
Shawn shook his head, "Nah, he and Hunter have this kind of rivalry that I just don't understand."
Kaitlyn's eyes were a bit wide as she nodded, then she crossed out the man from her list.
"How about Orton and Sheamus? They were pretty good when we took them to Walmart." Hunter offered, scratching his head with the pen.
Kaitlyn shook her head this time, looking up at him, "They both like to think of themselves as very serious people and Orton's trying to be a better role model for his daughter."
Now Hunter and Shawn just stared at her, only to have Shawn ask, "And what about Sheamus? He was funny after he got sugar and some alcohol in his system."
Kaitlyn smiled at the memory; even though she hadn't even been part of it; and said, "He'll be fighting us tooth and nail to go against everything we do. And while that is fun for some time, it'll just get annoying to convince him into helping us."
All of the men in the table agreed with her logic, then went silent as they tried to think up of some superstars they could recruit.
"Heath Slater?" Kaitlyn offered, only to have them shake their heads.
"Too Wendy-ish." Hunter explained, the silence returning after he explained.
"Yoshi Tatsu?" Shawn asked, looking at everyone on the table.
They seemed to think it over, then Hornswoggle shook his head. "Roo Rappy."
"He raps a lot?" Kaitlyn asked, confused at the leprechaun's words.
"He meant happy, Kait." Shawn explained, "The kid's too happy."
Kaitlyn 'Oh'd at the explanation, then went back to her list.
"The dudes from the Shield?" Hunter offered, only to get everyone to glare at him. "What?"
"Are you loco, bro?" Shawn exclaimed, jumping up from his seat to grab Hunter from the collar of his shirt.
"Why are you Mexican-"
"The Shield is the one stable with the three most dangerous guys on the roster right now? Do you really want those three after us if they don't understand our type of fun?" Kaitlyn cut him off, hands on the table as she leaned over it.
Hornswoggle was even standing beside him on the table, arms crossed as he glared down at the Game.
"A simple 'no' would've been okay." Hunter mumbled, Shawn's grip loosening as they all went back to their seats.
"How about-" Kaitlyn was about to offer after they had gone back to their lists, only to have a knock on the door interrupt them.
"What are you idiots doing here? And why in the world is it so dark in here?" A very recognizable man walked into the room with his arms crossed, looking at the four on the table in curiosity.
"Oh, hey, Miz." Kaitlyn greeted as she happily waved at him, getting a weary wave from him. "How about him?"
The other three men looked the Miz over, then Hunter shrugged. "We have our work cut out for us, but I got nothing against it."
Hornswoggle grunted his agreement, and Shawn nodded in consent.
"What are you all agreeing on? I'm not going to die, am I?" Miz asked, taking a step back as all four wrestlers got up from their chairs.
"Please, we don't need a virgin to sacrifice." Hunter rolled his eyes, getting a protest from the Awesome One.
"Shut up, Hunt. And GET HIM!" Shawn yelled, jumping forward to grab the younger man.
"Get off of me, Old Man!"
And as Shawn and Miz wrestled on the floor, with Hornswoggle kicking them at random intervals, Kaitlyn told Hunter, "I think he's a good choice."
"We'll see, Hybrid. We'll see."
I haven't updated in forever and I'm sorry, but things have just been piling on and I've barely wanted to write. But I'm trying to get back in the groove and I'll try to update this at least once a week.