AN: This is a new day, a new chapter, and a new taco bell! Oh, and yes, Naruto did kick everyone but Taniuchi out of the apartment. There are references to World War Z, a great book written by the son of one of my heroes, Mel Brooks, so if you see any, please tell me via review.

As for the guy who continued to PM me using SWAG as an actual word, I wanna say that SWAg is for boys, but CLASS is for men.

(Chapter 3)

Naruto had no idea what to do. The girl, Alice, had to pee. The little, sweet, innocent girl who reminded him so much of his deceased younger sibling had to pee, in the middle of a zombie infested shitstorm. He almost cried from how much God wanted him to suffer.

Shifting the girl slightly, he asked in a panicked tone of voice. "Can you hold it?"

She seemed to think before she shook her head no. "I'm sorry, but no. I HAVE to go, bad."

The Uzumaki regarded his options, and sighed at them. He could either let her pee on him, then he would have to deal with the shame of having been peed on. Or, he could rush back and get them caught.

A very difficult decision indeed.

Then it hit him.

What would his brother do?

Simple: He would let the girl, pee on the freaks.

Naruto adjusted her so that she was sitting in his arms, and 'pointed' her at a nearby freak. He reached for her panties and pulled them down, freeing her to pee. At her look, he smiled slightly in repressed laughter and said. "You can go now."

Alice nodded and got a focused look on her face as a stream of slightly yellowed liquid came forth, right into the mouth of the nearby freak.

(Apartment Balcony- That moment)

Everyone sweatdropped at Naruto's antics as they rushed to prepare the humvee for travel. Leave it to Naruto to think of something like that, and then actually do it.

(With Hidan)

Hidan stopped shooting the freaks for a moment and grinned. Seeing the grin, Rika asked. "What's gotten into you?"

The Eldest Uzumaki just shook his head and grinned even wider. "I have no idea why, but when I see him, I plan on giving my baby brother a beer. Something is telling me that he just did something that would have made me proud."

Shaking her head at her lover/husband/boyfriend/partner/slave, Rika said. "Less talking, more killing."

"Yes Ma'am!"

(With Naruto and Alice)

Seeing that she was done, Naruto pulled her panties back up and continued on his way. He had to steady himself when a rotted arm shot up and made him lose his balance slightly, almost making him fall down or drop Alice.

He would be damned if he let anything happen to the girl. She was way too much like his baby sister to let die in this hell hole. This girl, this girl whom he hadn't even known for an hour, had already wormed her way into his heart, filling a void he didn't even know he had.

Naruto knew that if she fell or got hurt, he wouldn't know what he would do. But he knew, just knew, that it would be incredibly violent and filled with the deaths of thousands of freaks, alongside anyone who dared hurt her in any way.

(With the others)

They had loaded the humvee and were prepared to get the fuck out of dodge, all they had to do was wait for Naruto to get closer, and they could go get him. Saeko still had on her apron, Saya a pair of short shorts, Taniuchi wore a pair of sweatpants and a grey shirt, Rei her nightie, and Shizuka had gotten a robe. Kohta was dressed as if he was headed to war. All of their supplies had been loaded and they were ready to go.

Seeing him no more than a block away, Saya signaled Shizuka. "Hit it!"

The sound of tires screeching filled the air as they drove closer to the Uzumaki. Saeko was standing on top of the armored vehicle, and had her hands ready.

Naruto saw them, and smiled at Alice in an apologetic manner. "Sorry Alice-Chan, but I need to give you a toss."

He held her tightly as he tossed her up and too Saeko, who caught her, and jumped as the car came speeding by. Time seemed to slow as he got closer and closer to the humvee, before he landed successfully onto the hood. Sitting up, he made his way down the hole into the rather cramped interior, setting his scythe down.

Looking at Alice, who had a cute glare on her young, innocent face, he couldn't help but laugh. It just bubbled up, and he was unable to stop it as it tore through him. "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

All of the others started to laugh as well, and they drove on into the night, ready to face anything that came their way.

(On the river)

Naruto was laying in the back of the humvee, humming slightly as he fished with a stick and string. They had managed to pack his tools, but all of the weapon parts had to be left behind for supplies. He didn't mind, he could always build more.

He certainly had the time.

He listened as Saya yelled at Kohta for fucking up Mother Goose when he felt them hit land. Standing, he jumped out and stood next to the vehicle as the others got out. He smiled as he helped Alice down, the girl covering her panties as he did.

Shizuka walked around with a large garbage bag in hand. At everyones looks, she elaborated. "I got some clothes from Rika's, we can't be going around in these forever."

All of the girls immediately charged the bag, intent on getting new clothes. Naruto chuckled a bit as Saya rounded on him. "Don't get any ideas, Naruto. No peeking."

Naruto leaned against the car, still chuckling. "Don't worry. I have no intention of looking without permission."

At her approving nod, he looked over at Kohta, who was fiddling with the guns. Looking at the supply, the Uzumaki asked. "Yo, do you have anything strong, but light?"

Kohta held up a very rugged looking pistol that looked to be made up of several parts (Hellboy's Pistol). "This is a simple cartridge pistol, capable of blowing the brains out of any freaks."

Taking it, Naruto tested it's weight in his hand before slipping it into his belt. A call from the girls made him turn around, and he froze at the sight of them.

Saeko was wearing her school blouse, a black skirt with a slit in it, purple thigh length stocking, and boots that had heels in them. At her waist was her wooden kendo sword.

Rei hadn't changed much, other than taking her stockings off and putting elbow and knee pads on.

Saya wore an open white blouse that accentuated her black shirt, a green skirt, and knee high black socks and shoes.

Shizuka was wearing an orange checkered skirt and white blouse, her brown shoes not changing.

The sight of these beauties made him pause for a moment, and when he regained his thought process, he smiled and nodded to them. "You guys look great."

Rei blushed as she pointed up the hill. "We might wanna get a move on. Why don't you and Kohta check the top of the hill?"

Naruto didn't say anything to her as he turned and walked up the hill, Kohta right behind.

As the two teen boys walked up the hill, Rei and the other girls were busy talking. Shizuka looked at a downcast Rei. "Why is Naruto like that? Did something happen?"

"Yeah." rei said. "Something did happen."


Rei sat there in shock as Naruto splattered Hisaishi's brains all over the roof of the school, tears in her eyes as she watched her boyfriend die a second time. Naruto looked at the body of his now dead best friend, a sad smile on his face.

Rei looked at him, tears spilling from her eyes. "Why did you do it?"

"Because, he asked me to." Was the simple reply.

Rei started to get angry at that. "Oh I bet you did! Admit it, you hated Hisaishi! You always have! Ever since we started to date, you've done nothing but distance yourself from us!"

"No. I didn't hate Hisaishi. Far from it. He was almost like family to me."

"Liar! You wanted him dead just so you could have me! Well too bad, because I hate you! i hate you so much! I hate everything you've ever done, and anything you'll ever do!"

Silence pervaded the area as Naruto stood there, his eyes closed before they snapped open. The orbs made Rei unconsciously take a step back. They were cold, devoid of any warmth, as if she was nothing to him. The sight of this once kind teen turned numb beast made rei's brain reboot, the true weight of her words hitting her full force. But before she could apologize, he moved calmly to the barricade, staring at it with no emotion.

She tried to say something, anything, but words escaped her at the moment. What she had said, the true meaning behind the venom filled words haunted her as she realized that her friend was gone, and she was alone.

Naruto spoke then. "Ever since I moved here, I've had the biggest crush on you. But, one day, when you were held back and I asked if I could help in any way, you said I wouldn't understand. That hurt so much, that the person I considered my best friend didn't trust me enough to even ask me for help. The next day, I saw you and Hisaishi at the bus stop. You were wrapped around his arm like a piece of candy. It tore me apart inside, seeing you so obviously fake in your happiness. But, so long as you were content, so was I. But now, I can see exactly what I mean to you."

Rei had no idea how to respond to that. She had, in her selfishness, tried to make Naruto jealous by dating Hisaishi. But, it had backfired. Now, she was at a loss of what to do. She never imagined that it would turn out like this, never in a million years. And now, her boyfriend was dead and her best friend most likely hated her.

(End Flashback)

Shaking those thoughts away, she climbed into the humvee and sat back as it nearly crushed Kohta. There were no freaks here, and it seemed to make Naruto tense.

"Where are all of them? Where the hell could they be?" The Silver haired young man mumbled.

(With Hidan and Rika)
A loud sound alerted Hidan immediately, jerking him from thoughts of eating ramen off of Rika's naked body. Looking down, he saw a group of heavily armored vehicles driving through the airport, killing the freaks. He looked through his scope and saw the same marking on all of them.

A single fan. He sighted them, and saw that they were surprisingly organised for what he assumed were idiotic 'bandits'. Chuckling, he mumbled. "Shit, looks like a party. Wonder if they got any booze?"

Rika's voice came over his headset. "Umm, Hidan, we may have a problem."

"And what would that be?"

"Those cars belong to the Uchiha Family. Cartel thugs."

Well shit, Hidan thought. The Uchiha were a big deal. If they were here, then that meant that something big was going down. he sighted them again and saw that they had stopped by a giant cargo plane, a large cage being wheeled down.

It was what was inside that made Hidan curse. "Fucking bullshit! The Uchiha are the ones that started this mess."

(Naruto- Same Time)

The Uzumaki looked up at a sign that read: 'Food and beds! Also the ever present Flames of Youth!' over a store that looked occupied. It was obvious that the owners were gone, and whoever lived here was kind enough to offer protection for the night, but he was still cautious.

Uzumaki Rule #16: No one does anything from the good of their heart.

Looking back at the group in the humvee, he whistled the signal for all clear and waited for them to walk up. When everyone was there, he opened the door and was hit by the greatest smell in the world.

He looked up as a shadow loomed over him. Standing there was perhaps the strangest sight he would ever see (AN: Bullshit!). The man had a bowl haircut and the largest eyebrows ever. They were fucking caterpillars! he wore a green tracksuit and orange leg warmers, the suit made out of what had to be spandex. He grinned as he spoke. "My, it seems that we have some visitors! Welcome to our home! My name is Might Guy!"

A teen around their age appeared randomly from the back, dressed exactly like Might Guy. "My name is Rock Lee!"

A girl wearing a pink blouse and brown pants, with brown eyes and brown hair tied in two buns on her head walked up. "My names Tenten Higurashi. Sorry about the mess."

And finally, a blind teen that had bandages wrapped around his eyes and a white loose shirt and brown shorts walked in. "My name is Neji Hyuuga. A pleasure to meet you, Fate."

No one said anything before they introduced themselves. Lee was ecstatic. "Guy-Sensei, it seems we have found more survivors!"

"It appears that way, Lee. Now, what's say we get you guys some food, huh? Whaddaya say?" Gai asked.

Neji scoffed and 'looked' away, inadvertently looking directly at Shizuka's chest. "They're just commoners. Nothing more. And by the way, nice chest. Fate."

Shizuka covered herself, indignant. Naruto pointed at the Hyuuga and said. "Why the fuck can you see, when you're blind?"

"Because fate decreed it, Fate."

"Fuck you asshole! Fate is used as a crutch for those who can't grow up, take their coins out of their purse, and hold the goddamn line!"

"Commoner trash!"

"Whore Bitch!"

"Skank licker!"

"Monkey Tit!"

"Worthless scum!"

"Blind Bastard!"


Everyone sweat dropped at the insult contest going on between the two, before they all laughed at the insult Naruto finished with. Kohta just yelled out 'BURN!'

"McDonald's Reject!"

AN: And that ends that little escapade into the chapter. Tune in next time for the newest installment of The Reaper Returns: HOTD Style!

Rigg: I'm back bitches!

Magg: So am I.

Me: I thought I killed the two of you ages ago! Why come back now?

Rigg and Magg: We were kicked outta Hell.

Rigg: Something about being annoying bastards...

Anyways, yes, Rigg and Magg are back and will be helping me with commentary during and after the chapters. So for all of us Nox's out there...

Rigg: Sparkle like Edward in the sun bitches!