It had been three months since Wilson had given up and gone running into the big bright light. The bastard.
Wilson was the guy that kept him going. The one constant in a life that enjoyed slapping him in the face. And kicking him in the leg. And kneeing him in the balls. Wilson stood buy and kept the earth turning. Polar opposite and exact replicate. They were both sarcastic assholes, honest—with each other at least—and for the last six months, in constant pain. But Wilson was good, in his heart. And House? He was a ghost. Given up his life for his best friend, there was nothing left for him in this world.
He'd been desiccating in their apartment for the last three months. Drinking himself stupid, drugging himself numb, wishing himself dead. But not dead. Death was boring. There was nothing in death. No puzzle, no obsession, no drugs. No pain, his mind whispered softly, in Cameron's voice, reminiscent of the burning building, the night he'd burnt Gregory House up, never wanting to look back. But now he was walking backwards, trying to remember when life wasn't a ball of steaming crap.
Suicide… The word sang through his ears like a siren song, alluring. Wouldn't be the first time he thought about it. Attempted it. But that wasn't why it played in his thoughts. What does a ghost do? It haunts the living. And even a ghost can keep their promises. No more Amber in his hallucinations. That would be too easy. Now, like a constant prissy little bastard whispering in his ear, was a conscience. Could you live with yourself if you didn't help her? Could you die happily? A conscience with Wilson's face.
So that's why he got up off of his ass, got dressed for the first time in three months and waded through mountains of take-out boxes and monster-truck DVDs to the front door.
He took care of his own pain first.
In his truck he drove the two motorcycles to a cliff-edge. Revved them up and watched them shoot off the edge of horizon, falling to scrap before even reaching the jagged rocks at the bottom of the Canyon.
Then he climbed into the truck and drove.