A/N- Return of the text msges! LoL. This isn't a sequel to my first, however. Just more texting between John and Sherlock, who, this time, are at least in different parts of London. Hope y'all enjoy! Please review! ;D

4-30-13


Msge 4 U: 2

1:45 J: Pick up milk and frozen pizza b4 cming home.

1:47 J: Sherlock, we had bet, rmbr? Don't ignore me for 48 hours strght, and u get to keep dead squirrl in freezer.

1:48 S: Before; coming; 'A' bet; Remember; straight; squirrel. Your spelling is particularly atrocious today, John.

1:49 J: It text shorthand, s.

1:49 S: It's- and don't abbreviate my name. It's degrading.

1:50 J: Lol, like u don't degrade every 1 else every chance u get.

1:50 S: You; one. What is so difficult about spelling out the word?

1:50 J: It payback.

1:51 J: What?

1:51 S: I'll let you process my last text for a few minutes.

1:52 J: Don't mock me, s. There; said it again. Lol.

1:52 S: Would calling you an idiot be better than ignoring you?

1:59 J: Bored, lol.

2:00 J: Bet, rmbr?

2:01 J: S, I no ur ther. Dn't u hav to crrct my wrtchd grmmr? And dn't 4get bet. U mst disct squrrl 4 cse.

2:08 S: Our 48 hour 'no ignoring' rule doesn't apply when I'm working, John. I was cross-examining a witness when your texting interrupted me.

2:08 S: I told you to shut up, but you didn't listen, so I shut you down. Was much fun. P.S. Your words are beyond saving.

2:09 J: U r so fnny.

2:09 S: You are; funny. Please make an effort. The jumble of letters you lazily refer to as 'shorthand' hurts even so adept a brain as my own.

2:10 J: Wait a second- I was telling you to pick up stuff b4 u come home. R u doing it?

2:10 S: I can't ignore you for another 29 hours and 46 minutes, John. Doesn't mean I have to do what you tell me to.

2:11 J: Sherlock, hre cmes a serious question: do u lke 2 eat?

2:12 S: Eating's boring.

2:12 J: Don't say eating's boring!

2:12 J: Nevermind. Pick up food anywy.

2:12 S: A trip to the store would be a five to six minute detour, John.

2:13 S: To say nothing of the idiocy running rampant where so many ordinary minds congregate, it isn't worth the time spent. My time, i.e.

2:13 J: Heaven 4bid u shud wast tme amngst so mch stupid.

2:14 S: Almost home.

2:14 J: Sherlock, do nt entr ths flat w/out milk and frozen pizza!

2:14 S: Order a pizza if you're so hungry, John.

2:15 J: U wn't hve so mch patience 4 that when your binging l8r, s.

2:15 S: I do not binge eat.

2:15 S: You're!

2:16 J: I've seen u gobble down an entire dish of risotto in 1 sittng, Sherlock.

2:16 S: Half a dish. Unless I'm mistaken- which is highly unlikely- you ate the other half single-handedly.

2:17 J: I'd spnt the evning w/ enough explsve to blow London off the globe strppd to my middle! Gve me break!

2:17 S: How exactly did nearly being 'blown off the globe' along with the English capitol affect your hunger, John?

2:17 J: I give up.

2:19 J: Thght u wre almst hme? Whre r u?

2:19 S: Thought you gave up.

2:20 S: Change of plans. Investigating scene of crime. Wouldn't want to get shot through the head by a pizza-craving war vet anyway, ha ha.

2:20 S: Who drinks milk with pizza anyway? Is that something 'normal' people do?

2:20 S: Why aren't you at work?

2:21 J: The mlk isn't 4 the pzza stpid, and I told u ths mrning, my day off.

2:21 S: I mean why aren't you here?

2:22 J: My day off.

2:22 S: I got that bit, John. Why aren't you here?

2:22 J: MY DAY OFF.

2:23 S: You could talk to me more effectively in person, John. I'm only a few blocks away.

2:23 J: I prefer to pester you like this. :) A little payback, eh?

2:23 S: I never pester you.

2:23 S: And contrary to your apparent belief, I really do the opposite of ignore you.

2:24 J: …Expln oppste?

2:24 S: Now, you needn't be embarrassed. The beauty of me talking to you when you aren't here is that you'll never find yourself on the receiving end of strange looks.

2:25 S: Which I, on the other hand, receive quite often.

2:25 J: Tht does embrss me.

2:25 S: What at the flat is important enough to keep you away from something remotely fun?

2:26 J: I m altrnatng btwn boring telly and boring u.

2:26 S: That remark is too stupid to merit a reply.

2:26 J: But you did reply. Lol

2:37 S: Frozen pizza and milk, was it?

2:37 J: Serious? Ur actually doing it? Plsntly surprisd is me.

2:38 J: While ur at it, we need beans 2.

2:38 J: And juice.

2:38 J: And tea.

2:39 S: Just the pizza and milk. My hands are already full.

2:39 J: …Sherlock, what strnge piece of evdnce r u bringng hme?

2:39 J: Plz tell me it ws nvr alive?

2:41 S: Not evidence.

2:41 J: ?

2:41 S: I lied earlier. I wasn't investigating the scene of the crime. More like picking up experimental material at Bart's.

2:42 J: Sherlock, do NOT brng tht bloody squrrl hme!

2:42 S: John, you sound idiotic when you use all caps. I tell you this as a well-meaning friend.

2:42 J: What abt bt?

2:43 J: Sherlock, what about our bet?

2:43 S: Thank you for speaking in English, John. What about it?

2:43 J: Do you still mean to stick by it?

2:44 J: Sherlock.

2:44 S: Be so kind as to clear a place in the freezer, John. :) C u soon.

2:45 J: So going to kill u.