Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

I would love to thank the wonderful women who help me. If it wasn't for them I wouldn't know what to do with myself. But, remember we are not perfect and even though six eyes are better than two, we are human and make mistakes. So, thanks to my beta(s) on this chapter: dannibags, piesmom

The banner was done by Mkystich, I knew when I saw it that I had to bring Domella to life.

I plan to update this story once a month at the moment. I can't give you a specific day yet, but I will be sure to include that in the notes if that changes. I'm working on three stories at once and I think a schedule would be the best idea. So, please bare with me here.

Warning: If you are interested in getting involved in the lifestyle, please take care and do research. Find a mentor in your area, find out about munches in your area, and always be safe, sane, and consensual.

Welcome to my dominant Bella story. I have been planning this one for a while now, ever since I wrote The Perfect Submissive. This chapter we will learn how old Bella is. How she found herself living in the BDSM community, and what she does for a living.

My Light, My Life

Chapter 1

The Light

BPOV

I was twenty-six years old, owned, and operated my own portrait studio. I had gradually built a name for myself in this community and had loyal customers. Some might often wander how I found myself with my own studio at such a young age, but it was all because of my parents.

As long as I could remember, I had always had a camera with me. When I finished high school and headed to college that is what I wanted to do with my life. So, I attended the University of Washington, where I earned a bachelor's degree in Fine Arts with a concentration in photography.

When I graduated, I took the first job that came to me. I worked at a photo studio in Wal-Mart making eight dollars an hour. It wasn't the job I truly wanted. I wanted my own studio where I could do what I wanted, but the professional camera that would be needed cost more than I had at the moment. I figured that I could work and get things moving forward in my life. When I had saved up enough money to purchase the camera, then I would look into opening up my own studio.

I was at work when I got the call about my parent's car accident. I rushed to the hospital to be by Dad's side. Mom had died instantly and Dad was in critical condition. I stood by his bedside with tears streaming down my face. He only woke up for a few minutes, and within that few minutes, he gave me his parting advice.

"Follow your dreams, Isabella," he whispered before closing his eyes and leaving me forever too.

My whole world shattered that day. I don't remember getting from the hospital to Carlisle and Esme's house, but that was where I woke up. The month's following their death were extremely hard, and I got through it the best I could. After everything settled down again, I headed back to work and drowned in my sorrows.

Carlisle and Esme were a huge blessing during this time. They were my parent's best friends and came to my rescue many times during that year. Esme pushed me to use both the insurance money and the inheritance to open my own studio. They believed in me, and somewhere along the way, they became more than my parent's friends. They also became my own friends.

I never looked at either one of them as my parents because they never treated me like a child. To them I was an equal, and I respected them more for that. It wasn't like I had any friends anyway. I had always been a loner with a camera around my neck; so I would always be content in doing things by myself.

Esme helped me find the perfect location, and she even helped me decorate the studio. Carlisle and she helped every way they could to get the studio off the ground. I did many weddings at first trying to drum up business, and I thought that if their wedding pictures were good enough then they would come back for the family portraits and pass the word around.

When things started getting busier at my studio, I no longer did weddings. But, if I wanted extra money I would, but weddings were not my cup of tea. They always reminded me that I was alone and the promise of eventually getting married was so far out of reach, it wasn't funny.

I didn't date much during that time and what little bit I did date, I was always left unsatisfied. I dated Paul for a while, but he had such a short fuse that I knew it wouldn't last too long, and sometimes he scared the shit out of me. Sam was another guy I dated and things were great until I caught him cheating with his ex-girlfriend. Then, there was Jake. Jake was okay and I was comfortable with him, but many things were missing. For one, we never connected on a level where I felt like I wanted or needed him. He was always paranoid that I would find someone else, which became extremely aggravating. It was as if I had no control in my life with him in the picture. Then there was the sex. I had to give it up to him and he tried, but it was never good enough. He always wanted to control every aspect of who I was and I couldn't take it anymore. I had no control in life and in the bedroom.

I had a hell of a time getting rid of him too, but eventually I set him up with a girl I had worked with at Wal-Mart. Vanessa seemed to really care about him, and he was out of my hair for good.

After Jake, I had casual dates, but none of the people I went out with appealed to me. The majority wanted the same control that Jake did, and I wasn't even going back to that situation; them needing to know where I am every second of the day. I would rather die alone than to let a man tell me what to do.

I wanted a man who could stand up to me, but allowed me freedom to be myself in the process. I wanted a man who listened in the bedroom, and when I wanted to tie him to the bed and screw him senseless, he would comply without complaints. I wanted to dominate that area of my life, and control the decisions I made. I didn't want someone dominating me all the time and telling me what to do and when to do it. Those where the types I always found when I dated causally. Somewhere during the date, they would assume they knew what I wanted and then force it upon me. That was when I would call for the check, pay my half of dinner, and left.

Things changed when I turned twenty-four and all it took was a couple of portraits to spin me in a new direction. I had always done Carlisle and Esme's portraits. When he called to have them done again so soon, I wondered if he was unhappy about the last photos, and tried to remember to ask when I went to their house.

I arrived at the house earlier than expected. I always brought the things I needed to do the photos at their house. That was something I did for regular clients, and Carlisle and Esme were my regulars. I hauled everything I needed from the back of my SUV. I was about to start setting everything up in the living room when Carlisle walked in.

"I need to talk to you before this shoot happens," Carlisle said looking down at his hands as he entered the room.

"Sure, was there something wrong with the last portraits you had done?" I asked.

I had to know if they were unhappy with my services.

"No, God no Bella. You do such a wonderful job. It's … well … I'm just going to say it," he paused and then looked straight at me.

"We need other types of pictures taken, and you are the only one I trust with this. However, if this makes you uncomfortable please let me know. I will try to find someone else who will do this for us."

"You don't have to find some else, I'm sure I can handle whatever you need done," I said trying to exude confidence.

I didn't know what he wanted and a little part of me was scared. I mean, what kind of pictures did they want?

"Have you ever done nudes?" he asked.

I hesitantly replied, "Yes."

"Good, good, uhm … look I was wondering if you could do some tasteful, but interesting shots. If you think there will be any weirdness, please tell me and I will try to find someone else."

"Can I have moment to myself to think?" I asked.

"Sure, sure. Just come and find me when you have your decision," he said leaving the living room.

I quickly picked up the pack of Marlboro's I had laid on the table and headed outside to clear my mind.

What is the worst that could happen? It wasn't like I was ashamed or embarrassed of nudity. Hell, I had to do a spread for my final and I had managed to be respectful and calm during the whole shoot. I didn't get excited at the sight of naked bodies placed in front of me.

I didn't look at Carlisle and Esme like they were my parents, which would have made the answer an automatic no, if I had. I had seen Esme in various stages of undress during our shopping adventure. So seeing her naked wouldn't bother me, but I worried about Carlisle. I knew that I could handle it and with all these aspects taken into consideration, my decision was made. I stubbed out my cigarette and headed back into the house. Carlisle was patiently waiting in the living room for me.

"I will do the shots," I said.

"Thank God, thank you so much Bella."

"Where's my equipment?" I asked looking around wondering where he put my stuff.

"It's in the room I would like to use for the shoot," he said reaching down to grab my hand. He led me up the stairs and allowed me to enter into a dark room that was dimly lit. I could barely make out the bed and different items hanging on the wall.

"Have you ever heard of BDSM?" he asked hesitantly.

"Vaguely," I replied stunned by the sight in front of me.

"The shoot today will have a BDSM theme about them. The shoot won't be of Esme and me," he said motioning at the door.

I was both shocked and somewhat relieved that it wasn't them. I could be more professional if it was someone else.

"Bella, I would like for you to meet Kate and Garrett. They will be your subjects for the day," he said motioning to the couple who walked up.

I was completely shocked at the sight before me. Kate was dressed in a tight black leather suit; it made me think of the cat woman outfit. Her face was covered with a mask, and I could just barely make out her features here in the light. I looked at everything about her and noticed she held a leash and a riding crop in one hand. I followed the line of the leash and saw a man crawling behind her. He was completely nude and I couldn't make out anything out about his face because his head was down. The leash was connected to a collar around his neck. He appeared to have a mask on as well.

"Kate is a dominatrix and Garrett here is her pet. The pictures you are going to take today are for the BDSM community. If you play your cards right and do a good job, like I know you will, you stand to have several more clients that will want shots like this," Carlisle replied watching the couple walk to the middle of the room.

My mind wondered at what kind of things the couple would want out of their shots. My mind started reeling with possibilities of what to do with them.

"There won't be any sex in these shots, but I want to make you aware that some will want that aspect too, if everything goes according to plan," Carlisle said watching me get everything together for the shoot.

"You will speak directly to Kate; she will give Garrett the orders to move. Always respect her dominant position over Garrett. You will be offending Kate if you don't ask her first. You also have to tell her if you need Garrett to move into a different position. Don't touch her or him unless you ask permission first either. You won't have to say Mistress or anything, but just show respect."

I squatted down pulling my camera out of the bags in front of me listening to Carlisle instructions.

"You will do fine. I will be here watching over this shoot because this is my playroom," Carlisle said timidly.

My neck about broke turning around to look at him. I stared at him for a couple of minutes. I couldn't believe that Esme and he were into these types of things. I had heard about this kind of lifestyle before; a lot of people looked down on people who enjoyed BDSM. I briefly wondered how long Carlisle and Esme had belonged to the community. I mean, why else would you have a playroom if you weren't using it? I had always had an open mind to how people choose to live their lives. I never knew exactly what BDSM was anyhow. I knew one thing about myself though, and that was I often wanted to tie Jake up. Hell, sometimes I would have given anything to duck taped his mouth shut.

"If you have questions after the shoot is over, I would be happy to answer them," Carlisle said patting my shoulder and heading into the darkness to stand. I could vaguely make his silhouette out by the wall.

I didn't take long to get the couple into positions. When she would demand Garrett into the positions I wanted, I could feel the temperature raising. I would be willing to bet my cheeks were probably red. My hands were shaking at one point when she scolded him for not moving quickly enough for me. Her words and the tone of her voice were like a siren's call. When the riding crop swished through the air and landed on his ass, I about crumpled to my knees. When he moaned in response to the lick she had given him, I about came in my panties.

By the end of the shoot, I was breathing hard. Everything they had displayed in front of me, I had envisioned doing those things to several of the men I was involved with; she had him every way I wanted. He listened to every command she gave without reservation and complaint.

I was completely blown away by the emotions I had during the shoot. I had never been affected by any of the nudes I had ever done in my life, and it wasn't like Kate was completely naked. In fact, she was completely clothed, but it was the atmosphere in the room that spiked my emotions.

I struggled to make it down the stairs. When Carlisle noticed, he came to my aide. He sat my bags down in the living room and ushered Kate and Garrett out of the house.

I sat down on the couch. Esme walked in and handed me a glass of liquor, I assumed. When I tipped the drink back, it was in fact whiskey. Marker's Mark to be exact. I needed that shot in order to calm my nerves.

"You're into that stuff?" I asked Esme after I emptied the reminder of the glass.

She walked over, bringing the rest of the bottle with her. She refilled my glass and handed it back to me.

"Yes," she replied calmly.

"How long?" I asked.

"Twenty years," Carlisle stated from the doorway of the living room.

"We're my parents involved?" I asked. I knew they were best friends and a part of me wanted to know, but another part of me didn't want to know.

"They knew about us, but they were never a part of it," Carlisle said coming over and sitting in front of me. Esme quickly poured him a glass of Marker's Mark and handed it to him. For the first time in years, I noticed her demeanor change when he walked into the room.

We talked for hours that night. Carlisle asked me if I was affected during the shoot. When he asked he raised his eyebrow at me, I swallowed hard, but admitted to the thoughts that were running around in my mind during the shoot. I also told him about wanting to tie Jake up, but he wouldn't allow it. Carlisle invited me to a local munch that was coming up soon. He said that if I was truly interested in the lifestyle that he would take me under his wing and show me everything I needed to know. I blanched at the idea at first. I didn't want to see them have sex, but Carlisle told me that the lifestyle wasn't always about sex. He could teach me everything I needed to know without us even having to be naked, or having sex at all.

That night I lay in bed dreaming of a green-eyed man with a leash wrapped around his neck. He would bend to all my rules and listen to my every demand without a complaint. When I awoke the next morning, I was breathing hard, sweating, and horny as hell.

The pictures from that shoot turned out beautiful, and I was invited to several different play parties because of my work. Others wanted the same things with their relationships. So, it wasn't long before I started catering to the community with photos. And, some of the clubs wanted me as their official photographer for several different scenes or advertisements.

Several months passed and I went to every munch, play party, and club that specialized in the lifestyle. Carlisle and Esme accompanied me to every meeting, and even introduced me to others in the community. I was astonished to see so many people with like minds, and demonstrations on how to use different items for play. God, the things I saw left me hot and bothered and wanting for more. But, Carlisle refused to let me participate in any play until I fully understood the actions taking place. When I finally couldn't take it anymore, I started my training.

Carlisle was true to his word; every Wednesday night I would go to their house and learn about different things. I learned how to tie intricate knots and make beautiful designs on one's body. I learned how it felt to be struck with different implements like floggers, riding crops, whips, and canes. He also taught me how to wield those implements for pleasure.

Esme would participate in the training sometimes when Carlisle wanted me to see what her reactions were to different things. It felt so wrong when I would strike her with something, but I followed his directions. The only time I struggled in my training was when he had to punish Esme. I understood the need for chastisement, but I didn't like watching it. It would hurt me when he struck her like that and it wasn't ever hard or even left a mark beyond the pinks or reds. I only had to watch once thank God, and it was to get an idea of what punishment would be like with my pet one day. I never knew if I would be able to punish my pet, but I guess I would have to cross that bridge when I got there.

There was only one time during the whole training phase that I saw Esme completely nude, and that was the day that Carlisle taught me about different clamps. He wanted me to get an idea of what to look for in aftercare, and how to properly attach them. He encouraged me to practice on my own when I refused to get naked in front of him. He didn't ask, but I bluntly told him I wouldn't. He handed me a new set of clamps, told me they were mine, and sent me home to try them out. Later, that night I had the best orgasm of my life, and I even entertained some thoughts about getting my nipples pierced.

Toward the end of my time training with Carlisle, he asked Kate and Garrett to help better assist me with things that would be used on a male submissive. She was more than willing to help. She even allowed me to do things with her submissive I would never allow mine to do. Every Wednesday I went to her house; and played with her and her submissive in her playroom, but there was still something missing.

Carlisle suggested that maybe it was time for me to have my own submissive or pet, but I still didn't think that was what I needed. The green-eyed male from my dreams still haunted my subconscious. I couldn't understand why I had those dreams, but if I ever came across those green eyes, I knew I would never be able to go back.

After deciding that I didn't want a permanent submissive, I placed an ad at 'Eclipse' and in a couple of community magazines that I would offer my services to submissives or people interested in learning more about the lifestyle. I planned to cater to a list of fetishes, but never once was sex an option.

Once the decision was made, I had one other problem to solve and that was the issue of my house. The house I currently lived in was my parent's home that I could never part with. It was two bedrooms and one bathroom. There was no way I would be able to be who I was now in the small house, and not to mention that just the thoughts of tying someone up in my parent's bedroom gave me the heebie jeebies.

So, I borrowed Esme one day and we both went hunting for a new house in the area. It wasn't long before I found the one I was looking for, and with Esme's help, we decorated it just the way I wanted. I refused to take the master bedroom, but opted to turn it into my playroom.

We pulled the carpet up and added dark hardwood floors. We painted the walls black. A king size bed was placed up against the wall, and we decorated it with white satin sheets, and black and red pillows. It was a four-poster bed that allowed the installation of a swing. Or, I could tie someone to the posts. The possibilities were endless.

Carlisle assisted me in getting the things I would need, and mounted them on the wall. When the room was almost done, we added a cross on the opposite wall. A couple of cabinets on another wall; those would house the essentials of different items to use for play. I even purchased a chair that could be used for sex, if so desired.

Once everything was in its place, I was satisfied with the look. It was finally complete. I was happy to have the master bedroom as my playroom, and more than happy to have my bedroom down the hall. I was accustom to sleeping in a smaller room, and didn't need for my bathroom to be in the same room. So, with the ensuite bathroom in the playroom, it worked for me. It seemed better that way.

It didn't take long for me to build up a list of clients. Between the studio during the day, the side projects for the community, and my nightly activities as a dominatrix, my life was completely satisfying or so I thought.

A/N: All right we know where Bella has been and where she is now. The next chapter we will learn about her different clients, and the addition of the new green eyed client. As always, be kind and show some love. Remember, this story will be a slow updater, so be sure to tag the alert button before you go.