I just want it to be known that I know Harry is an exceptionally strong person. But even the strongest of people have their insecurities.
When Harry woke up and tried rolling over, he realized that there were weights spread across his body. Deciding to go back to sleep, he murmured, "why'sh the 'anketsh so 'eavy?" And when nobody immediately answered, he snuggled back into his pillow.
"Harry you need to wake up."
"I don't wanna." He growled into his pillow.
"Mate get up. There's stuff we need to talk about."
Lifting his head slightly off the pillow he tried again to make them leave. "Like what? Ten Reasons Harry Potter can't sleep without the aid of a sleeping potion? Number one. Nightmares. Number Two. Annoying friends who won't leave him alone.."
He could almost hear the smile in Ron's voice when he replied. "Number three. Your boyfriends just floo'd in and are waiting in the living room."
Harry lay there motionless. "I have boyfriends?" He asked nobody in particular, before standing up and stretching. He didn't notice that the snake from last night was wrapped around his neck, or that his pants were hanging low on his hips. He yawned and tried to flatten his hair before making his way downstairs and into the living room. "Gred! Forge! What are you two doing here?" He asked upon coming face to face with them.
"We have a-"
"Business proposition to-"
"Discuss with you."
Harry nodded his head. "And? What is it?"
"Let us use either the couch-"
"Or the second bedroom-"
"Until our apartment airs out?"
The dark haired man grinned. "What did you guys blow up this time?"
Fred's eyes suddenly widened. "Harry mate, why is there a snake around your neck?"
"Because he was cold." He said, before gently looping his hands around Snape's slim body and sitting him on the floor.
George waggled his eyebrows. "He?"
Harry rolled his eyes and walked towards the kitchen. "It's too early for your cheerful nonsense. Explain your reasoning or I'm kicking you out." He was pulling stuff out of the cabinets and fridge.
He was reaching for something on the top shelf when a warm body pressed against him, and a long freckled arm grabbed down the box. "Let me help you." A voice whispered into his ear as arms wrapped around his waist.
Harry turned around and was about to say something when Ron spoke. "See what I mean Harry? Every time you three are alone together you get somehow sexually assaulted."
Fred, who had been watching his brother try to 'fluster' Harry, turned at the hissing noise and jumped when he saw all of the snakes. "WHY THE FUCK DO YOU HAVE SO MANY GOD DAMNED SNAKES?"
Harry looked away from George, and followed where Fred's hand was pointing with his eyes and suddenly jumped away from George, his cheeks a startling red. "Neville had a mishap in potions class and everybody turned into a snake."
"Mr. Potter, I would appreciate it if you wouldn't tell all of your friends about our… condition."
Harry rolled his eyes and started to make his breakfast. "Guys… and Girls, Dobby went and caught some mice last night, so if you're hungry tell me and I'll ask him to take you to them." Harry finished the food and filled three plates as he sat them down on the table. When he looked up and saw that Fred was still staring at the snakes frightened he smirked. "Don't worry Fred. Snape knows that if he bites you he'll become part of dinner."
"Snape?" He asked, before plopping in a chair across from Harry.
George however, sat down in the chair next to Harry, and scooted so close that he was practically in the younger boys lap. "Have you missed us Harry?"
Harry rolled his emerald green eyes again. "Of course I did, you guys are two of my best friends."
Fred leaned towards him from across the table. "Just friends?"
Completely oblivious to the implications that they were making, Harry nodded. "Eat your food, then we'll find somewhere to put you." Before he could take his first bite though, a few of the sn… students asked to be fed. "If you're hungry, slither back into the living room and I'll ask Dobby to feed you." When they complied Harry called for Dobby.
"Whats can Dobby be doings for yous sir?"
"There are some hungry snakes in the living room, will you take them one at a time and feed them." At Dobby's nervous look Harry gave him an understanding smile. "Don't worry Dobby, they won't hurt you."
Fred looked down to see a snake staring up at him, and he looked towards Harry frightened. "Harry, why is this snake staring at me?"
Harry looked below the table, "Pansy, why are you staring at Fred Weasley?"
"Because he smells good. Will you ask him if I may climb up his arm and lay across his shoulders?"
Harry smiled at the Slytherin before sitting back up and looking at Fred. "She wants to know if she can lie across your shoulders."
Fred glared down at the snake, a sneer on his lips. "If you bite me, when you return human you will be prank bombed, and it will not end until you or you admit defeat."
Harry rolled his eyes. "She says you're on… and with her it's not the first bite that you really have to worry about. She's a Red-Necked Keelback and for her venom to spread she has to bite a few times, in somewhat of a chewing motion."
Fred scoffed as the snake slithered its way up his arm. "Just because I won't be poisoned doesn't mean that it won't hurt like a bitch."
After they had all finished their breakfast Harry led them up the stairs, and into a room that had once been an office, which sat next to Harry's new room. "You guys can sleep in here. You'll need to transfigure furniture and what not. But there you go."
He felt arms wrap around his waist. "But Har-Bear why can't we sleep in your room?"
Harry shrugged. "There's only one bed, but I guess we could put in some bunk beds."
"Potter, I thought that your stupidity astounded me before, but now I'm blown away. Do you really not understand what they're trying to do?"
Harry shook the arms away and then turned to glare at the snake that was Professor Snape. "I'm not stupid you bloody prick."
"They're trying to get into your pants. They want to sleep with you."
Harry rolled his eyes, "Yeah just like you and I fuck all the time. Fred and George are just joking around. Who would want a sad excuse of a man like myself when they could have someone else.. someone better. Nobody! That's who." Harry suddenly shoved past the twins, walked into his room and slammed the door shut.
"Do you feel like we just-."
"Missed something incredibly important?"
"Yeah I do."
Fred and George exchanged a look, before Fred stepped into their room and cast a spell on the wall between theirs and Harry's room so that they could see what Harry was doing. Neither of the redheads noticed the snakes that followed him as they watched Harry kick his desk, before sitting on the edge of his bed. Harry's fingers were tangled in his hair, and it looked like he was trying to tear it out. "Nobody will ever want a worthless freak like me. Nobody."