Clueless

A/N: Hey, y'all!

So…Another hidden chapter. If you are wondering what I mean by "another", then go check out my other hidden chapters: IHOP and Dilemma.

Heeeeere we go!

[Summary for Clueless: Max shrugged Fang's hand off. She looked up at him, finally making eye contact. Also managing to make him feel like crap. He kind of just wanted to kick himself. "…You are clueless."]

I guess you deserve an excerpt. This takes place after chapter 62 in School's Out - Forever:

I frowned, shaking my head in frustration. "Nothing. No pattern, no meaning. The Bible was a great idea, but maybe we're doing it wrong."

"So I guess we just kiss the world goodbye," Fang said after a pause.

I gave him a look. "So funny. You're quite the wit."

He gave the barest hint of a smug smile. "The ladies like it."

Iggy burst out laughing, but I just stared at Fang, appalled. How could he joke about something like that? Sometimes I felt as if I didn't even know him anymore.

I stood up, letting my pages fall to the ground. "I'm beat. See you in the morning." I stood up and left without another look at either of them.

"I don't suppose you took a look at my blog yet?" Fang called out. I didn't bother to answer…that I had. And it was good. The boy had some poetry in him.

FANG

"PMS," Iggy sang loudly after her.

Fang rolled his eyes. He wondered why Max was so cranky. Then he tried to remember a time when she wasn't cranky. Harder than it seemed.

Fang tossed the Bible onto the couch cushion where Max had previously been sitting and kicked his feet up on the coffee table. Iggy sighed. Everyone else was asleep.

"What's wrong with Max?" Iggy asked.

Fang shrugged, then realized his friend couldn't see. "Who knows these days?"

She'd been really closed off around Fang lately, kind of giving him the cold shoulder. He tried to think back, figure out what he did to get her all hot. But as far as he could tell, he hadn't insulted women or done anything moronic in the past few days.

Just as Iggy was about to say something, most likely something about how Max was very dramatic and emotional all the freaking time, the landline rang from the desk across the room.

Before either of the boys could reach it, it stopped ringing. Iggy got up and threw it at Fang. It said Line in use.

"Someone else answered it," Fang mumbled.

Loud, angry footsteps pounded down the steps at that moment and suddenly a furious looking Max was standing in front of them.

"It's for you," she said, dropping the phone in Fang's lap.

Fang scooped it up, watching her leave the room. "Hello?"

"Nick! Sorry it's so late. I just had one teensy question to ask!"

"It's cool. What's up?" Iggy leaned forward, as if he couldn't already hear Lissa clearly from where he was sitting.

"I think you might've grabbed my notebook today by accident," she said. "It's dark blue. I was just wondering if you had it in your bag?"

Yes, he did. He'd seen it when he had gotten home from school. "Yeah."

"Oh, great. I was worrying like crazy! That's got all my History notes in it!"

Fang said nothing.

"Okay, well that was all! I'll see you tomorrow, Nick."

"Okay."

"Goodnight, Nick."

"Uh, bye."

Fang hung up and set the phone on the table.

"Was that the red head? The flirty one who's always hanging on you?" Iggy asked.

Fang gave him a look, which was shot to hell. He really wished Iggy could receive death glares.

"Lighten up, man. It was just a question."

Okay, so maybe he could still feel death glares.

"Yeah," Fang said shortly, standing up. He headed up the stairs and Iggy followed him.

"So, she called you after midnight to ask if you had one of her notebooks?" Iggy asked. "Did I miss part of that conversation? Did she slip in a 'Are you alone?' that I missed?"

Fang felt like shoving Iggy down the stairs.

"She just wanted to know if I had her notebook. I do."

"Yeah," Iggy said agreeably. "You two must've swapped school books while you were swapping spit."

Fang rolled his eyes.

"Do you prefer sucking face?"

No response.

"So, you have a girlfriend," Iggy continued as they walked past Nudge's room and Gazzy's room.

Fang said nothing.

Iggy pulled him back and they stopped in front of Max's closed bedroom door.

"I know why Max is so pissed at you now."

Fang raised an eyebrow, pretty sure he didn't want to hear Ig's theory.

"Of course!" Iggy exclaimed. "Trouble in Paradise! Max is jeal-"

Max's door flew open. "Shut up, you imbecile, you don't know anything!" Max shoved Iggy down the hall and he stumbled, reaching his arm out to try and brace himself against the wall.

"Jeez, Max," Iggy said through his laughter. "Real smooth. That didn't come off as jealous at all."

Max gritted her teeth. Fang stared down at her, but she refused to look in his direction.

Iggy rolled his shoulders, saying, "Don't sweat it, Fang. Mama Bear's just mad that Papa Bear's gettin' it elsewhere-"

"Go to bed!" Max hissed, her voice shaking with anger. Or maybe something else.

"Don't worry, Max, I monitored their phone call, nothing too racy-"

"Iggy," Fang said finally. Iggy shook his head and finally went into his room, chuckling.

Max stood in the doorway of her room, breathing heavily, glaring at the ground. Fang could see that her cheeks were bright pink - from anger or embarrassment? - and her hands were clenched into fists at her sides.

"He's an idiot," Fang said, shoving his hands in his pockets.

"He's not the only one," she mumbled.

Fang put one of his hands on Max's shoulder. "You gonna grind your teeth down to numbs doin' that," Fang said jokingly, referring to her furious expression and her clenched jaw.

Max shrugged his hand off. She looked up at him, finally making eye contact. Also managing to make him feel like shit. He kind of just wanted to kick himself.

"…You are clueless."

Then she shut her door in his face.

And he was more clueless than ever before.