Yeah, yeah so I don't own Hey Arnold!. Big deal! I can still write fan fictions for it. It's a free country! ^_~ To those who do own Hey Arnold!, YOU ARE AWESOME! Anyways, the story is mine, all mine! *evil laughter* Hope you all like it. Don't plagiarize or sue me though. Or you'll be sent straight to Principal Wartz.

Helga's Letters

Part One: Arch Enemies

P.S. 118 was all a buzz with busy students. It was getting closer to the end of the year and the teachers, as usual, were trying to cram the last half of the required curriculum into their brains before the end-of-the-year testing started. And they only had about two weeks to do it.

Coincidentally, it had also been just a few weeks after the dance. Helga Pataki sat in her desk in the back of the room gazing at Arnold. Her beloved football headed angel of love. Going to the dance with him hadn't been a dream date at first, but soon…it was heavenly. They'd danced the night away and Arnold had even dared to plant a kiss on her hand before running back to the boarding house. And boy had he hightailed it!

Hmph, Helga laughed to herself, guess he knew better than to try and kiss my cheek or something.

"And now we need to get to a part of the fourth grade curriculum that seldom gets covered in it's entirety." Mr. Simmons explained, "Examining poetry and the greatest poets of our time."

"But Mr. Simmons," Stinky raised his hand, "I thought we'd done a lot of that poetry stuff already?"

"Well Stinky, we covered the great poets of history, not of modern day. And while I know we've all written poems on our own. I want to see poetry from you that relates to modern techniques and poetic topics. Some of which are timeless, like love."

"This really bites." Stinky muttered.

"Now class, your first assignment will be to write me a lengthy poem about something that you're passionate about." Mr. Simmons continued. "Whether it be a sport, a friend, a hobby, anything."

"Passion," Helga whispered dreamily, "oh Arnold my love, you are my one true passion in life. My dream, my muse, my flaxen haired angel. You're so kind and sympathetic. Yet so bold and daring. How could I have any other passion but you. Oh Arnold my darling, I pray that my poem, which Mr. Simmons is sure to read aloud as he always does (pretending my name is not there and claiming the work 'anonymous'), inspires you to feel such a deep and heart wrenching passion towards me."

Raspy breathing stopped her from rambling on any further. Her fist flew up and Brainy went down.


Lunchtime, everyone was stuffing food in their mouths and talking about the events of the day. Bossy teachers, bulking bullies, and what they would do once the bell finally rang at 2:45.

Just as Helga and Phoebe sat down at their usual table to eat, Chocolate Boy rushed up to Helga waving a letter in his hand.

"What do you want?" she grumbled, taking out her sandwich.

"Chocolate," he exclaimed, "but right now I'm supposed to give you this letter."


"I bumped into this kid yesterday in the park and he said he'd give me three chocolate bars if I got this letter to you." he explained shoving the letter into her hands, "So here, here, take it! I NEED chocolate!"

"Weird." Helga muttered to Phoebe.

"It's an obsession," Phoebe sighed and tossed Helga a knowing glance, "You of all people should understand that."

"Watch it Phoebs." Helga warned. Turning to Chocolate Boy she asked, "And who gave you this?"

"I think he signed his name in the letter." Chocolate Boy panted, "I was gonna give it to you this morning but the vending machine man showed up. And he had chocolate. Lots of chocolate!"

She looked the letter over, it was covered with chocolate stains on the back. "I see."

"Okay okay." he panted, "I got you the letter. If you see him tell him okay?"

"Fine. Sure. Whatever."

"YAY! Chocolate here I come!" and he turned and hurried off.

"At the risk of sounding nosy, what does the letter say Helga?" Phoebe inquired.

Helga's eyes skimmed the letter and then doubled in size. "WHAT?!"

Phoebe seemed taken aback. "What is it Helga? Is something wrong?"

"I'll say something's wrong Phoebe," Helga shouted, unaware of how much attention she was drawing towards herself, "just listen to this…

Dear Helga,

I'm sure you know me but I don't know if you've realized just how infatuated I am with you. Let me begin by saying that you have the most stunning blue eyes I've ever seen. Hahaha… I know my flattery may seem a tad forward but I simply must see you today at the park.

It is only fitting to flirt with a lady so fair among other fair things such as the beautiful spring flowers of nature and beneath the luminous sun and pale blue sky. Say you will come my lady. I shall await you by the pond where I hope you will agree to come on a swan boat ride with me. Until then my sweet, spirited, angelic beauty.

Yours Forever,

Rex Smyth Higgins"

"Oh my," Phoebe gasped.

"I know!" Helga shouted, "Who does this clown think he is?"

"Well Helga, I reckon he thinks he's Rex Smyth Higgins. On the count of that's who he is." Stinky stated, coming over to the table followed by Sid and Harold.

"Oh Helga, I think it's just ever so sweet the way he wrote to you." Lila sighed as she too approached with Rhonda and Nadine.

"What? Have you all lost your minds?" Helga yelled, "I'm Helga G. Pataki. I do NOT fall for rich snobbish guys!"

"Well HE certainly seems to have fallen for YOU." Rhonda pointed out. "Although I can't imagine why."

Helga growled at Rhonda as Harold broke in, "Oooo…Helga's got a boyfriend!"

She grabbed his collar and jerked him forward, "Listen Tubbo, I do NOT have a boyfriend!"

Arnold and Gerald were listening to the whole conversation from their table. "Do you think it's true Gerald?"

"What? You mean Rex liking Helga?" Gerald asked as if he couldn't care less, which he probably couldn't. "I don't know man. It seems pretty obvious with that note he wrote her and all."

"Yeah but, Helga would never go out with him right?" Arnold grinned.

"Who knows?" Gerald replied, "If you ask me, I say those two deserve each other."


"Arnold c'mon!" he exclaimed, "They're both rude, mean, have nasty tempers and-"

"That still doesn't mean they deserve each other." Arnold stated.

"You're right man," Gerald laughed, "Nobody, not even Rex Smyth Higgins, deserves to get stuck with a girl like Helga G. Pataki!"

Arnold tried not to laugh but failed. It was true, he DID almost feel sorry for poor Rex…almost. "Yeah, he's pretty close to being my arch enemy and all, but I couldn't see him having to deal with Helga 24-7."

"I heard that Football Face!" an angry voice snapped.

"Aw relax Helga," Gerald snickered, "we were just kidding around."

Helga stuck her fist in Gerald's face, "Maybe you'd like to repeat that for Old Betsy here Tall Hair Boy?"

Phoebe stepped up and lowered Helga's fist, "Um Helga, perhaps we should be getting back to class before we get sent to Principal Wartz?"

Groaning Helga spun around, "You got lucky this time Geraldo, but watch that tongue of yours. Or I'll yank it out. See how many phony legends you can tell then."

Gerald turned back around in his seat, "Man Arnold, Helga's one person who could seriously use an attitude adjustment."

"She's just touchy Gerald," Arnold shrugged, "I get the feeling that she's not so bad deep down. She was pretty nice after the dance."

"Yeah," Gerald agreed, "but Helga can't go too long without bringing out her dark side. Face it Arnold, that girl is just bad news. And she still has it out for you."

Helga and Phoebe were walking down the hall back towards class. "Uh Helga?"

"What is it Phoebe?"

"I was just wondering if you were going by the park after school today?" Phoebe asked.

"Why? So I can sit in a dorky little swan boat and float around talking with that stuck up brat Rex Higgins?"

Phoebe nodded. "Something like that."

"Have you lost your ever lovin' mind Phoebe?!" Helga squealed, "I don't like Rex, I'll never like Rex. And do you know why? It's because of-"

"Ice Cream." Phoebe offered.

"Yeah, that's right." Helga relented, "Ice Cream."

"Well, maybe this will make 'Ice Cream' realize that you're not going to wait around, pining for him forever."

"What are you getting at Phoebe?"

"If Ice Cream sees that you're giving other 'flavors' a try then he might get jealous and reveal his true feelings."

Helga considered this a moment, she'd tried something similar to this with Stinky once. That had been a total mistake. But maybe if she tried with someone who was practically Arnold's arch enemy? What did she have to lose? "Phoebe---you're a genius!"

"Why thank you Helga," Phoebe blushed, "I try."

"No time to sit around talking Phoebs." Helga grabbed her friend's arm and started hauling her off to the girl's bathroom. "We've got some scheming to do!"


*Liking the sequel to "Love's Follies" so far? Let me know. Hope this fiction is a success. I just love it when Helga starts plotting ways to win Arnold's heart. Mwuhahaha!!!*