Chapter 7.. this is going to be a bit of a filler chapter. Only because I kind of forgot what happened after the whole shooting thing . However, I think you'll enjoy this Jori filled chapter…
Maybe it's the gravity of the situation that's making me feel this way. Because there's no way I'm in love with her… I could have sworn I was past that feeling a long time ago. And now it's back, and I don't think it's going away, and it really isn't fair. I know she's in love with me, and she rejected me last time, so that's what I'm going to do this time. No one rejects me and gets a second chance… no one.
"Hurry!" She yells as we make our way to her apartment. Why we're going back there I have no idea… that's the first place they'll look. I still follow her, because what else can I do exactly?
We burst through the door and she heads straight for the piano. What the hell?
"It has to be here… there has to be another message!" She yells, louder than necessary. I walk over to her and grab her by the shoulders and turn her so she's facing me. I look deep into her eyes which are filled with panic and fear. If I've learned anything over the past little bit I've been with her is my eyes hypnotize her.
So I just stand there, my hands firmly on her shoulders, my eyes boring into her sole. I give her the smallest of smiles and she relaxes on my hold. I could stay like this forever, actually.
Don't fall for it, Jade… she rejected you… you can't let it happen again…
I sigh deeply, because for once my conscious was right. I'm Jade West the heartbreaker… not the heartbroken. But she's leaning in and there's nothing I can do to stop her. I'm powerless against her, even if I'm too stuck up to admit it.
Her lips are millimeters away and I want to close the distance, so badly.
She's going to break your heart.
My eyes snap open and I'm stumbling away from her in an instant. The look she's giving me breaks my heart. It's one of confusion, hurt and fear.
"Did… did I-I do something wrong?" She asks, her voice quiet and broken. I want to say, no, you didn't. I want to tell her I love her and that I want her to be my girlfriend. But I can't. I refuse to be broken again, not after I've rebuilt my walls.
"This… It can't happen, Tori." I say calmly, leaning against the nearest wall. She blinks, and then blinks again, a single tear falling from her eye. It takes all my will power to not go over to her and wipe her eyes and kiss her sadness away.
"Why, Jade? What did I do that was so bad?" She croaks. My jaw tightens and I clench my fists. I wish I could forget when she rejected me… it hurt so badly… it hurt so bad…
"Hey." I smile as I sit down next to her at the coffee shops oddly circular table. I hand her a cinnamon latte as I take a drink from my tall black coffee with two sugars. We're friends, good friends if you will. But I've always wanted something more. I love her, and I want her to know it.
"It's so dark in here." She whines, resting her chin on her hands. I just let out a small chuckle and smile at her. I love when she whines… it's so cute.
"Well, get used to it. I don't think it's going to get any brighter." And then she smiles, and my heart twitches.
"We should go. Come back to my place?" She asks with another smile, to which I agree.
We walk out into the nearly empty streets, since it is so late, and head towards her apartment. It's a ten minute walk at most, but it was freezing outside. I noticed she was a little cold, but before I could say anything, she intertwined our hands. I could die right now, and I would be pretty damn happy.
"It's so cold.." She whispers. So I do what any good friend would do.. I took off my jacket and put it on her. She smiles at me and leans up slightly to kiss me on the cheek.
We're standing at the building complex doors, but I don't notice. I'm too focused on the tingling on my cheek.
"You coming Jade?" She asks with a giggle, to which I nod dumbly and follow her up the stairs and into her apartment. It's now or never, Jade; now or never.
I go and sit by her on the couch. She yawns and leans her head on my shoulder while wrapping her arms around my waist. There is really no other place I would rather be right now. Being in Tori Vega's arms is like floating above your favorite city at night. It's exhilarating, breath taking and terrifying all at once.
Don't do it Jade… you'll get hurt.
Sometimes I really hate my conscious. It's never right, so why should I listen to it now?
"Tori…?" I ask hesitantly. She looks up and me and smiles.
I swallow hard, this is it. If I don't say it now, I don't think I ever will. But I can't find the words to say. And before I know it, I'm grabbing her cheek and pressing my lips to hers. She's kissing back… that's good right? Right.
I move my hands down to her waist and gently push my finger tips under her shirt. But she pulls back an her eyes are full of panic and something I never wanted to see…
"T-Tori?" I ask softly as she stands up and shakes her head. I bolt up and try to reach for her hand but she yanks it away, almost like I've burnt her.
"Don't… don't touch me, Jade." She whispers, looking at the floor.
"I-I don't understand…" I whimper, tears threatening my eyes. She looks up and her eyes are red and over flowing with emotion.
"I can't love you Jade… I just can't."
-End of Flashback-
I'm shaking, and she's looking at me like I've just been kidnapped and just got back home after 10 years.
"Do you remember that day Tori?" I spit, making her flinch. "Because I remember it quite well, as you can tell."
"God, Jade… I'm… I'm so, so sorry." She pleads, another tear leaving her eye. "You know I love y-"
But before she can finish, I slam my hand against the wall so hard, it leaves a hole.
"Don't you dare finish that sentence Vega" I scream; the throbbing in my hand is nothing compared to the anger and the hurt I feel pulsing through my veins. I can't do this anymore… so I storm out of the door, with her following suit. Just as we were about to round a corner, I saw a robotic hand. I stopped and she ran right into my back. I gave her the universal 'be quiet' sign and told her to go back in her apartment.
Once we got back, I lightly shut the door and pulled her into the bathroom.
"Jade.. can we talk about it?" She asks, and I just roll my eyes before opening the shower curtain and pulling her into the tub with me.
"No." I deadpan. I open the cabinet above the tub and type a code into the key pad on the inside of the door. The shelves slide down, leaving an open space with a slide leading into darkness.
"Whoa…" She draws out. I look at her questionably and she shifts her feet. "So, uh, who goes first?"
And this is where I smirk and shrug. "You," I say simply.
"Wha-?" But before she can get the sentence out, I hook one arm around her stomach and the other around her legs and push her down the slide.
"Later Vega," I chuckle before positioning myself at the top of the slide. Once I hear a thud I press the button on the key pad and the shelves slowly rise back up. And then I'm descending into darkness.
Once my feet touch the ground, I stand up and brace myself against the wall.
"J-Jade where… where are you?" Vega asks quietly. I sigh and tap her on her shoulder, making her jump.
"Right here," I say simply, starting the walk down the pitch black corridor. She catches up with me and is now walking almost shoulder to shoulder with me. If I remember right, there's a light switch that turns on the emergency lights somewhere along the right wall. I move over and drag my hand across the wall until I find it. I flip it and for about every 25 feet, there is an emergency light. Making it brighter, but still dark enough to scare Vega.
"It's still creepily dark down here." She says, her eyes darting around looking for any signs of danger.
"Yeah, whatever." I say, stuffing my hands into my jean pockets.
"Damn it, Jade! I'm trying… okay? But this is never going to work out if you're just going to be a stubborn little asshole that's too insecure about herself and to blind to the whole world to see what's right in front of her!" She huffs as I stop dead in my tracks. I turn towards her as a low growl rumbles deep in my throat.
"What did you call me, Vega?"
"You heard me, West." She spits.
I want to hurt her… so bad. I push her hard against the wall and grab the collar of her white shirt. When she tries to squirm out of my grip, I push her harder against the wall, causing her to groan. I raise my fist over my head ready to bring it down hard over her beautiful face.
Do it, Jade. You and I both know she deserves it.
She shaking and whimpering… but the rage that's pumping through my veins is overpowering. That voice inside my head… my conscious, isn't helping. I start to lower my fist, my face stern when…
No! Punch her. Beat her to shreds. No one calls Jade West those things.
And this is when I realize, this isn't my conscious. This is all the anger, the rage, the hate, the hurtful words, all the rejection bottled up into something I've thought to be my conscious. It's nothing of the sort, it's my demon… a strong one at that.
Think back to eight months ago, Jade. Remember the week after?
I messed up so bad. I want to take back the kiss... But at the same time I don't.
I'm walking over to her apartment to… well, honestly I don't know. Should I apologize? Should I just kiss her again? Should I just walk back to my house now? Yep… going to go with that one. Okay, I'm going to take the short way home, since I really don't feel like walking that far. I turn a corner leading into a dark alley way.
Once through the alley, I walk for a few more minutes before arriving at my house. Small, dark, and it takes a long ass time to climb up the stairs. Finally I'm up the stairs and in my kitchen. I notice there's a note on the fridge…
The reason I've been ignoring you for the past week is because I needed time to think. Since I've spent the whole week thinking, I think you deserve an answer. It's a no, I'm sorry. I just, can't see me being with you… you know? We've been friends for a while, and I really want it to stay that way. I mean, this is just some joke we'll laugh about in a few months, right?
I know you won't like this letter, so I'm going to end it. But thank you for understanding my decision. I really am sorry.
-End of Flashback-
"Just some joke, huh?" I spit angrily in her terrified face. "Is that what I am to you? Some joke?"
"I-I… barely remember that… I'm s-sorry…" She whimpers, making me clench my jaw and raise my fist higher.
There you go. Just remember she doesn't love you. She broke you.
"Sorry? I think it's a little late for that now, Tori." I growl, my grip tightening on the collar.
My demon's right, she broke me. And no one breaks Jade West. I'm not supposed to be weak, I'm strong, I'm independent, I'm my own person.
My own person… yeah, that means no one can tell me what to do… not even my demons.
Are you hearing yourself? I'm helping you damn it!
I'm clenching my fist so tight, my knuckles are white. And she's shaking, whimpering. And then a tear falls from her brown eyes… scared… weak… helpless.
"J-Jade… stop… p-please." She whispers. I look into her eyes and I feel my heart break… I'm going to hurt her. Something I promised never to do. I lick my lips as I let a tear fall from my eye. I drop my fist and walk backward until my back meets the opposite wall. I slide down it and bring my knees to my chest; wrapping my arms around them I start shaking as I let all the emotions out.
"I'm sorry… I-I'm so sorry Tori. Don't… please don't hate me." I cry. "I'm so sorry... please forgive me."
"Jade…" She says softly. I look up and she's crouching in front of me, a worried look on her face.
"It hurts… y-you hurt me so much. I just… I wanted to hurt you back."
"Jade, look at me… I don't remember anything in too much detail. But from what you're telling me, I was a bitch to you and I'm sorry. I really do care about you… more than anything."
She's doing it again. Making me feel… better. And all I can do is smile at her, because no one has ever been able to make me feel like that. "It's going to take some time, Tori. But… I want there to be, you know, a you and me."
And then she smiles, and it lights up the darkest corners in my heart. If my demon is still there, it's going to be vacant for a long time as long as she's beside me.
"There's nothing I would like more." I stand up and she takes my hand. "Now, let's go save our colony."
And so, things are slowly fixing themselves, patching up the holes, painting over the mistakes. It's a work in progress, that's for sure, but someday, all the renovations will be finished. I'm more than aware that there will always be water damage, a broken window, a crack in the wall. Life's a project, especially in this world. But with Tori by my side, I know we'll make it.
What did you think of me putting this chapter in Jade's POV? We got a little glimpse at what happened between them in the past, and how that's impacting the future for them. Does this sound like an ending? Probably, but it's not, there's still the big fight scene coming up!