I wrote this after reading the one my friend did where Shizuo is the one who's died. "To a certain flea" by EM Fiction (Add a '.' between e, m and fiction)

Dear Shizu-chan,

Providing that A-this letter made its way to you and B-You can actually read, I can safely say that you no longer need to worry about me trespassing into Ikebukuro or making your life hell. No longer will you have to see me and become enraged before chasing me and throwing heavy objects at me. I won't be here to bother you, anger you or call you Shizu-chan anymore. I bet you are glad about that, I know how much you hate the nickname. I dare say you hated it almost as much as you hated me, yes hated not hate.

If you are reading this letter then I, the Great Izaya Orihara, no longer walk among the living. If you don't get it yet then I will make it simpler for you; unlike you I cannot survive a gunshot, well not to the head anyway. As far as I am aware you have never had that happen… Anyway I'm dead.

I would be surprised if you are actually reading this you know. Knowing you as soon as you read 'Dear Shizu-chan' you would tear this letter up. However you never do as I expect or want so who knows? Maybe you are actually reading this…

Despite knowing how impatient you are, I am not making this letter any shorter for you to read, though I guess you would expect that of me. There are few reasons why I took this course of action and I felt I should explain them to you seeing as you are involved somewhat. I have also sent letters to Shinra, Celty, Namie and my sisters. I have put all my affairs into order and my sisters will be taken care of and I know they could count on you if they wanted to. To list the reasons I would say that life is well was becoming tedious for me. It was all the same stuff day in day out, it got to the point where our chases were the highlight of the day, sounds pretty sad don't you think?

Another reason for my voluntary departure was down to something no one knew about me. I made sure no one ever found out, especially you for you would most likely either laugh at me or kill me. This secret has existed since back in Raira and is the main reason for why I would always pester you even after we graduated. However, now that I am dead I don't have anything to worry about and can freely tell you. Shizuo Heiwajima, despite all the times I have said I hated you, told you to die, despite all of the insults I threw your way, none of it was ever true. I never meant it when I said you should die, although I am smarter than you, you are not actually stupid. As for me hating you… it was the complete opposite. I, Izaya Orihara, loved you, Shizuo Heiwajima. How funny that throughout my life I always called you Shizu-chan and now that I am dead I finally call you by your actual name.

I know I always said I loved all humans equally and that I hated you, but it wasn't true. Humans are boring as a whole; it's when you look at them individually that you see what humanity is really like, which was what interested me. You were too unique for me to associate you with my humans. I called you a monster or a brute for your strength. I know the vast majority feared you for it, I was intrigued by it. I was never scared of you Shizuo, not even once. Even if I hadn't loved you, I would never be afraid.

I bet you are laughing right now, it sounds so absurd doesn't it? That may be the case, but it is true. Also, I am sorry for getting you fired from numerous jobs, damaging those bartender suits from your brother and injuring you so many times, well except for the first time. You deserved that for trying to punch me in the face. We had only just met and you tried to hit me! It's a good thing I am quick as otherwise you would have damaged my lovely face. Anyway, I am sorry for those things; really I am, though I doubt you actually believe me.

This letter was the longest to write, I had more to say to you that to the others. There is plenty more I could say but I wouldn't want to overload your brain. So, goodbye Shizu-chan, I would say I hope you miss me, but what are the chances of that happening? Most likely 1% like the chance of me being innocent as you once said.

Farewell, Shizuo Heiwajima

Love The Flea

Shizuo Heiwajima had read this letter a few times, letting it sink in. Izaya was gone, dead. He would never see that mischievous smirk he always wore; never hear him say 'Shizu-chan' again. Izaya thought he was going to be glad about this? For someone supposedly so smart, he had his stupid moments.

"You idiot… you stupid, stupid flea..." He placed the letter down, not wanting the ink to run from the tears threatening to fall from his eyes. He hadn't cried since he was a small child; trust Izaya to mess that up as well. He didn't stop the tears, he let them fall freely. If there was a time in his life where he wished he could have done something differently, this was it. Shizuo wished that he could go back and at some point told the flea. Told him he cared, because he did. Sure Izaya pissed him off, but like he had written in his letter, he wasn't afraid of him in the slightest.

"Izaya, when I die, you better be ready, cause I am going to kick your ass." He chuckled slightly to himself and wiped his eyes.