Prompt: Lauren brings something home that Aria isn't sure about.


Aria T'Loak had seen many different things in her lifetime. Ask her for a description of a sunset and she could write a book about sunsets on Thessia. But this was the first time she'd ever actually found herself at a loss on how to describe what she was staring at.

Lauren's ass.

Somehow the human had managed to wedge herself underneath the desk in their apartment in a vain effort to catch a furry little creature that she'd brought home. She'd called it a "cat" and specified that it was from her home planet of Earth. The tiny creature had panicked at the sight of Aria and fled underneath the desk, where it was thwarting every attempt by the biotic to grab it.

Aria turned her head slightly to the right and tried not to laugh as she listened to Lauren swear and croon at the thing at the same time.

"-Come here you furry little piece of shit. Lauren's not going to hurt you, you fucking idiot." The human crooned. "Come here, little baby. It's okay."

There was a distinct hiss and a sudden jerk from Lauren, followed by the loud thump of the human's head hitting the desk.

"Motherfucker!" The blonde crawled out from underneath the desk and rubbed at her head. "Ouch."

Aria got up from the couch and walked over, placing her hand on Lauren's shoulder. "Give up, it's not coming out."

"Fuck no," Lauren huffed. "I didn't rescue this damn thing for it to hide underneath the fucking desk for the rest of its life."

"You rescued it?" Aria asked weakly. What was with her and rescuing things? Fucking Alliance-trained instincts.

Lauren nodded, frowning as she did so. "There was this cute little girl with a box with this kitten-"

"I thought it was a cat?"

Lauren blinked at Aria, not realizing that the asari still had no idea what a "cat" was. "Oh. A kitten is what we call a baby cat."

"So it's a kitten?" The asari asked.

Lauren nodded. "He'll grow up to be a cat though. The girl was going to take him to be euthanized if she couldn't find a home for him. And I figured, why the hell not? I mean, it's just a fucking little cat." She glared at the desk suddenly. "That's decided to take refuge underneath the desk."

"So you brought it home to our temporary apartment on the Citadel, hoping that I wouldn't mind us having a pet?" Aria asked dryly.

"I thought you liked spontaneity."

"Not when it involves something that can kill you."

Lauren snorted. "He's too little to any serious damage. See?" She showed a small scratch on her left hand. "All he does is scratch. When he gets bigger it might be a problem. Besides, I figured you could use the company while you're stuck up here." Lauren gestured to Aria's injured leg.

Aria sighed. "So how do we get it out from under the desk? I don't want it attacking me while I work."

"Well, force isn't working. So..." Lauren made a face. "Food might. We have any milk in the apartment?"

"That crap you drink? Yes."

"Good." Lauren stood up and left the room abruptly.

Aria gave a wary glance at the door before she got down to look underneath the desk. At first she didn't see the furry little creature curled up in the corner with its fur puffed out in every direction. It hissed upon seeing her.

"Wonderful," Aria sighed. "It makes noise."

The kitten hissed again and tried to make itself seem smaller by backing up as far as it could.

Aria sighed again. "You know she's not going to give up until you come out, right?"

The kitten didn't make a sound and kept staring at her with bright green eyes.

"I'm not kidding, the woman won't give up. Better to just come out now and get it over with."

The kitten let out a tiny sound and shuffled a little closer to her. Curious, Aria extended her hand a few inches and laid her hand flat. The little creature shuffled over and sniffed an inch or two away from her hand. Aria watched as it slowly walked over to the edge of her fingers and sniffed them. Then it made a tiny little noise and rubbed its head against her fingers.

"What are you doing?" Lauren's voice asked.

"Shhh!" Aria shushed her. "It's sniffing my hand."

"Good - here." A small little saucer full of a white liquid was set down by Aria's other hand. "Feed it."

"It drinks that crap?" Aria asked as she inched the saucer towards the kitten.

Suddenly Aria felt a hand on her back as Lauren lowered herself on her knees next to her. The human peered under the desk and propped her head up on her arm. Aria looked back at the kitten and watched at it approached the saucer and eagerly sniffed it.

"Go on," Lauren cooed. "Drink it."

Aria watched as it began to slurp up the milk, making some sort of humming noise while it did so.

"It's called purring. They do it when they're happy." Lauren explained quietly.

Aria looked at Lauren, who was watching the kitten with a small smile. "Why did you bring this thing home?"

Lauren snorted. "All that mind melding and you can't remember a thing about the cat I had as a kid? I'm sure I showed it to you."

She stiffened for a second before she realized what Lauren was talking about. That furry creature that Lauren used to sleep with and move strings for. "Jalapeno?"

"Loved that cat. It's done eating." She extended her hand and gently scooped up the kitten, who was purring heavily.

They both shuffled out from under the desk and stood up. Aria looked at the little bundle of fur in Lauren's arm.

"You're a cute little thing when you're not scratching me." Lauren cooed, scratching it's head.

"Do we have to keep it?" Aria asked.

"Yes." Lauren looked over the kitten. "No fleas, no mangy or bare patches. You can't be more than a pound. You ate, so you're not sick. Good. Now he's yours until I come home from work."

Aria looked at the kitten and back up at her bondmate. "You're kidding right?"

"Nope. Someone has to work." Lauren held the kitten out to Aria. "Just keep an eye on him and I'll be back in a few hours."

Aria gingerly accepted the kitten. "I hate you so much right now."

"You'll do fine."

"Fuck you."