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Chapter 32: Spy's interlude
Even in the soft silence of their mutual fulfillment, with the scent of sex on their skins and the walls that echoed with their moans, Natasha was the Black Widow.
When she was in his arms, she was warm and exciting. She returned his kisses with the same passion and let him hug her, caress her, search for her mouth and skin before doing the same to him. But Clint knew that nothing of her became more vulnerable just because she had taken off her clothes and discarded her gun, her second gun and three knives at the foot of the bed.
Nothing of her would ever be vulnerable when Natasha allowed herself to be human.
When she felt safe, in their most intimate moments, her muscles relaxed and her expression softened without showing that sweet, timid smile she used to charm her targets. But her mind always stayed alert, even when she was with him.
There were some small details that proved how much Natasha trusted him, though. Like the fact that she let him see her completely naked, leaving her weapon away from her reach. Or that she didn't assume a position anymore where she could always see the door and the windows from. Or that she allowed herself to fall asleep next to him, and to truly sleep, because it wasn't the perfect pretense she used to doing on her missions.
It was the most human behavior Natasha could show him, and to Clint, who knew her like no one else, it was enough.
"Natasha, do you ever stop being a spy?".
It was the first time they had sex after Budapest and Clint still wasn't sure if Natasha had truly wanted him or just wanted to use her body to manipulate him.
She smiled, and he fell in love with her a little more.
"I can't stop being me".
And she lived up to her name even now, because what Clint hadn't said when they had been together with the other Avengers had sounded loud and clear in the intimacy of his room. Natasha had squeezed the truth out of him even before taking her clothes off.
"I don't like it", he told her for the third time since he had heard her light steps coming into his bedroom – and he had heard her only because he knew she was coming and because Natasha wasn't trying to conceal her presence.
She looked at him through the dark, reading inside his mind.
"I know what Loki did to you".
But no, she didn't, not really, because her brainwashing had been way different from the willing, satisfying and needy servitude that the asshole god had imposed on him.
"Then why are you defending him?".
"I am not defending him. But we have to think about Earth, now. About saving her and her inhabitants. If Thanos truly wants to bring war here regardless of Loki's fate, we must think of the best way to face him".
He couldn't help but laugh bitterly.
"And you think allying with that bastard would be a good idea?".
Even the intimacy with her hadn't mellowed the thought of Loki as an ally. He didn't know how she of all people could have suggested something like that.
"I never talked about an alliance. I just think it would be wise to join our forces against a common enemy, instead of wasting our men and weapons fighting against each other".
"Sure, why not?" Clint snorted and knew his sarcasm was hard and maybe offensive, but didn't care. "Even if I agreed to not attack the bastard on sight, he surely can't wait to become our newest bro in arms".
Not that he would ever accept a truce with him. He had an arrow for him and the promise to stick it into one of his eyes was the thought that made sleep come easier to him during the night.
The look Natasha gave him was enough to tell him that she knew exactly what he was thinking.
"If we have to trust Thor regarding Thanos' dangerousness, even Loki won't be able to escape him for long. Together with us he'll have more possibilities to defeat him and he knows it".
"And you expect him to be trustworthy? You think he won't play double or even triple game, using us as expendable pawns like he did during the Chitauri invasion?".
Her gaze hardened.
"Loki is not the only one who can use people for his own goals".
She sat up on the bed, naked and beautiful.
The distant moon accentuated her perfect profile and the shape of her breasts, and even in the semi-darkness of the night Clint could feel her charm – but for him, Natasha was a lot more: she was more than her beauty, more than her seduction, more than the sensation of her thighs around his hips.
Even with the resentment burning in his throat and the thought of Loki upsetting him, Clint felt the desire to have her again.
"When everything will be over, even if Loki will be still alive, he won't be in his best shape", Natasha went on. "He will be weakened, vulnerable, exhausted". Her red lips opened in a smile, and Clint realized he loved that smile that seemed stained with blood. "And then, it won't be difficult to dispose of him".
I know, it's a short chapter with no Loki and no Tony, I'm sorry. The good thing: next chapter will be twice as long and full of Loki and Tony (sort of) interaction!
Thank you for reading.