Hey guys, I know I shouldn't start a new fic, but this is a selection of humourous drabbles for Eshi9.

When I reach milestones, I ask for requests, and Eshi9 asked for a humour piece for either HP, Twilight, or Glee, using all the cliches. I started the HP one, but started having a bit too much fun, so each category will be a story, each chapter being a drabble. They're terribly written, so apologies, but they do allow me to write, and get rid of the writers block I've had for ages.

Each drabble will be in basic, simple form, so don't hate on the writing style. They can be read in any order, and will have relevant chapter names.

Each drabble is a cliche I've noticed in a few Fics I've read throughout my time on .

Minor swearing, but other than that enjoy these drabbles that make little to no sense!


Harry is sitting alone in a compartment of the Hogwarts Express. Over the summer he has lost most of his boyish charm, including his puppy fat, and now boasts muscles, including a slightly defined four-pack. His hair, with a lot of product, has been flattened down, and his eye sight was fixed, with Vernon giving the excuse that 'he needed to be able to see the garden so he didn't do such a bad job next time'. He had also grown, and now stood at 5'11".

The door slid open, jerking Harry out of his thoughts. In walked Ron. He too had changed, his height reaching just less than 6'2", his body becoming more defined, and his clothes boasted wealth.

"Hey Harry." Ron's baritone cut through the air, rendering Harry speechless. "I guess you noticed the clothes. Turns out that Fred and George got a lot of customers, so we're not poor anymore. Have you seen Hermione?"

Turns out, summer had treated them all well.

Hermione had blossomed into a vibrant young lady. She had curves in all the right places, and the dress she wore showed them off perfectly. Her hair had been tamed, and the subtle make-up on her face boasted elegance.

"Hello boys, nice summer"

"Willyougooutwithmehermione" asyoucantelli'mnotpooranymore.

"Wait, what?" Said Hermione.

"Will you go out with me Hermione?" blushes Ron.

"I will!"

They passionately kiss. Unbeknownst to them, Harry has fancied Hermione since third year.

From this point on, Harry either discovers his inner homosexuality, or realises that Ginny is no longer twelve, when she's actually thirteen!