I hope you enjoy this, the third chapter :) If you have the time to review, that would be wonderful, but if not, I really appreciate you reading my story.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters, only the plot is mine.
Warnings: Fluffity fluff fluff. And sadness.
Third Circle: Gluttony
They loll over the canvas, reaching for more, desire for what is killing them overpowering all other thoughts, needs-
He tears his gaze away.
He can't think about it.
When they graduate high school, Alec doesn't quite realise the full implications of too much of a good thing.
What he does realise, however, is that he has a long holiday ahead of him before he and Magnus leave for college.
But Magnus goes back to Indonesia to visit old friends for a month just as the summer starts.
And Alec gets a taste of what addiction withdrawals feel like.
For almost three years, he's spent so much time with Magnus: at school, hanging out, talking over the Internet, over the phone.
He's become so accustomed to his presence, even with the times of forced separation by Camille in the last year, that it feels like half of him is missing.
At first, he just feels slightly empty, like there's something missing, something he's laid aside and forgotten about. Then he turns to say some remark to his friend, but Magnus isn't beside him, and he won't be able to get any messages he sends. By the end of the first week Alec is writing letter after letter of things to tell Magnus, things that have happened. He starts seeing little things in shops that remind him of Magnus, and he soon has a little collection of knick knacks and other random things in a box under his bed.
By the end of the month Alec hasn't left his room for five days except to eat, drink and visit the bathroom because he can't breathe without Magnus. The day Magnus arrives back, Alec waits at the airport and barely manages to refrain from squeezing the taller man as tight as he can in an attempt to make up for the lack of physical contact.
Magnus pulls him into a hug anyway, and Alec can finally relax.
He has him back.
When they step away Alec realises that Magnus seems even taller than before, and, mock affronted, says so. Magnus just laughs and flips off the bystanders who are looking at them disapprovingly before slinging his arm around Alec's shoulders and leading him off to the baggage collection.
While Magnus is grabbing his bright yellow bags, Alec has the time to watch him, drink in the sight. Refuel, almost. His hair's a bit longer and held up in a ponytail, and his clothes are plain for once. He brings his bags over and Alec notices that apart from a trace of blue eyeliner, his face is completely bare of make up. He doesn't no how long since he's seen him like this, naked of self improvement for anyone's sake. And he misses it.
Alec realises he was staring and brushes some of Magnus' hair away from his face without thinking. "I just missed you."
He grabs one of the bags and leads the way to the exit.
"I missed you too, Alec."
On the way to Magnus' house, he tells him about how Jace has gone to a summer camp to, well, stalk the girl he has a crush on, Izzy's had to get a job in a shop to pay for her shopping and phone bill (but it's okay, because it's a fashionable boutique that she gets a 10% discount for,) and Max is metaphorically devouring a set of encyclopaedias.
When Magnus asks what he's been doing while he's been away - or who - Alec just shrugs and blushes.
He wasn't exactly going to say that he'd spent the whole time thinking about him.
They spend the day together, dropping Magnus' things at his house before going to a cafe for a welcome back lunch - which is just the two of them, because Alec told Izzy that Magnus was arriving in the afternoon and so she's working. So Alec can laugh with him, watch him as he smiles and tells stories - stories, that, half the time, go in one ear and straight out of the other because he'll get distracted by the sight of the man that he hasn't seen for so long and that he missed him like he was the other half of his soul.
But in truth, in the depths of his heart, Alec can acknowledge that to be false. Because it honestly feels like Magnus is his soul.
Magnus' parents are away on their own little holiday for the first week that he's back, so Magnus joins them for dinner at the Lightwoods, and Izzy is as 'super excited' as she'd been proclaiming, and the first thing the sixteen year old does when she sees Magnus is pull him into her room to look at all the new clothes she's bought. And Alec puts up with it, but then Max steals him away to show him all the awesome things that he's learnt and Alec feels impatient and Magnus is his best friend, not theirs but Izzy joins him and smirks and they get into a mock fight until the other two come back.
Robert and Maryse don't exactly like Magnus, Alec knows that, mostly because of his flamboyance and sexuality, but he's Alec's friend - the only one that they've really met a lot, because it's sad but the only friends he has are Magnus and Magnus' friends like Kate and Dia - and so his parents are polite.
It's pretty late by the time they finish dinner but Magnus is still in a completely different time zone, so Alec drives him back to his house, Magnus pours him a drink and they raise a glass to home. They sit on the floor and play cards until Alec is too sleepy to make proper decisions and so Magnus turns on the tv and leans against the sofa and pulls at Alec until his head is lying on Magnus' thighs, just beside his knees, and Magnus is playing with his hair as he watches a rerun of some awful soap opera.
And then Alec tells Magnus that he missed him, that he didn't know what to do with himself while he was gone. And Magnus' voice is warm when he says that he'll always be here if Alec wants him to be.
But when Alec wakes in the morning he's not sure whether he was just dreaming when Magnus said that, because sometime during the night Magnus must have moved them, and now they're lying side by side and one of Magnus' arms is curled around him. And it feels so nice, so good - so like heaven if that weren't cliche - that he decides that he must have dreamt it, because yes, one of these things might have happened, but not both.
So he lies there a short while longer before easing up and heading into the kitchen to get a drink and check the contents of the cupboards and fridge. Magnus' parents have only left a couple of days before, so there's still some reasonably fresh fruit and other groceries in the fridge, and Alec pulls out the ingredients for pancakes.
He's already cooked four of them by the time Magnus wanders into the kitchen, drawn by the smell of food, and hovers around. Alec bumps into him a few times by accident, because the smooth connection that they sometimes have isn't there anymore, or perhaps something has changed- but no, it's probably just that not practicing the habit made him feel off balance, because while he's flipping the sixth over he sees Magnus rummaging through the cupboards and he feels pleased when he points out the chocolate and Magnus grins that swift, way-too-charming grin at him.
He's still a bit disarmed, still feeling the effects of it too much to stop Magnus when he pours a new pancake into the pan and begins to grate chocolate over it. As usual.
But Alec can't really protest as he normally would, because Magnus is here and he's still fighting the urge to throw his arms around him.
Magnus is just the same as usual, eating his chocolatey pancakes with whipped cream in a way that makes Alec blush if he watches, and when they've eaten as many pancakes as they can and there's still mixture left over, Magnus makes vulgarly shaped pancakes as always and Alec can watch his antics with a smile as always and maybe perv on his butt a little while he makes his collection of penis-pancakes.
It's nice, the first few days after Magnus gets back. They just kind of hang out all day, and them spend the nights watching crap movies and the fashion shows that Magnus got his parents to tape while he was away. It's practically a week of blissful just Magnus.
But gradually they begin to meet up with people again, and there are parties, which Magnus loves, but Alec has what could be better described as a toleration for them, but he attends anyway because Magnus always looks so guilty going without him.
But all of these parties are worse than the past ones because everyone is rejoicing in the absolute freedom they currently have, and their adulthood, and Magnus dances and kisses more than usual and Alec can do nothing but watch, or try and fail to look away from his magnetic presence. Occasionally girls he doesn't know will talk to him, god knows why, but he doesn't really know how to flirt with them as they expect him to and he's completely not interested in them anyway, so the furthest he's got with anyone is, embarrassingly, kisses that were planted on him by drunks.
Guys have hit on him a couple of times, but he always freezes up, because yes, he is appreciative of their looks, and godammit he wouldn't mind kissing them, but he's afraid of everything. He's not even sure what it is that stops him anymore, except that it's Magnus, because it's always him. Kissing another guy would be betraying Magnus - by not telling him the truth of his sexuality, but also, of course, because he can't get the other man out of his head anymore.
It's bloody well not fair.
Izzy keeps asking him why he goes to the parties and Alec can only shrug and ask himself the same question, really, because he doesn't quite understand why he does it to himself, why he chooses to watch Magnus flirt and seduce every pretty boy and girl he sees.
He still doesn't understand how Izzy knows everything about him, either.
Jace comes back from his summer camp sullen and moody, which kind of makes Alec feels slightly better about himself, because not even the handsome, perfect Jace can get everything he wants.
For a little while, Alec feels somewhat caught in an eddy, as the days repeat, the same thing again and again.
Until one day his parents come home from work and announce that they decided to buy an apartment in Boston, as an investment, but it's reasonably near to Boston University, so Alec could live there, instead of in the dorm, and, well, it's pretty close to MassArt as well, so Magnus can live there too, and wouldn't that be nice?
Alec just sits there with his mouth hanging open for a minute before he can say "Wow, that's awesome, thanks," and get the hell out of there.
He'd faced the fact that going to different colleges, even if they were nearby, would mean that he and Magnus would invariably see less of each other, and that they would no doubt drift apart.
And every time he thought about it his heart felt like it was being squeezed in a vice.
So he doesn't think about it much, grateful that there's a chance to stop that feeling and goes back downstairs to thank his parents properly and calls Magnus as soon as he can.
Magnus is delighted, of course, and Alec's parents invite Magnus over for dinner to work everything out. They look at pictures on the real estate website and the place is really nice and Magnus is beaming and even hugs Alec's mother at one point because Maryse and Robert say that they're going to calculate the rent on how much they can actually pay at the time.
And then about half way through the conversation, Alec realises that he's going to be living with Magnus. He's going to see him everyday. They'll be eating dinner together, washing each other's clothes, watching TV together. Even more of his life will be Magnus.
But now he can't say 'Actually, I've changed my mind, I'd rather live in a tiny dorm room with an asshole whom I can't stand for an entire year than share a really nice house with Magnus. Nothing personal.'
He looks up from where he's gripping the table so tight and Magnus is beaming, because there's three bedrooms and so maybe he could turn the spare one into a painting room so that he can paint there and not stink up the whole house with bad smells. Alec can't take that joy away from him, because he keeps talking about how awesome it will be, how great it'll be to live together, like family-
And Alec can't take it anymore and his forehead falls into his hands and he groans, and Magnus is immediately at his side, asking what's wrong. He somehow gets the strength to pull his head back up and tell his best friend that it's just a headache, nothing to worry about, but Magnus pushes him up the stairs and forces him into bed and says 'Just rest, Alec, you look like you need to, I'll see you in the morning, okay?' and is gone.
Alec closes his eyes and wills himself to go to sleep.
They can sort more things out in the morning.
And it'll all be okay, sure Magnus will be near him night and day, and he'll have to be near him and his boyfriends and girlfriends, and when he was younger the only people he thought he'd be living with aside from his family and college roommates was someone he was dating so he has to get his head around that properly because he's forgotten it since he met Magnus - and shit, Magnus walks around mostly naked sometimes - but everything's going to be okay. There's no such thing as too much Magnus and everything is going to be okay.
Next update on the 2nd of July