Recently while I've been working on Fix You, I've been having some pretty intense Bade feels, especially after the past couple of chapters that I've posted. So, I decided to do a little one-shot on the side :D I've also been slightly (that's an understatement) obsessed with Bade post TWC (as you can probably tell from the most recent chapters of Fix You,as well as from my other one shot), so that was kind of the inspiration for this one-shot. Hope you enjoy it :)
The room fell into an awkward silence as the remaining teenagers watched Beck walk away from the door. No one could believe what had just happened; it was a shock for everyone, including Beck. Out of all of them though, Cat was the most surprised. She had always seen Beck as the caring, loving boyfriend, who would never let Jade forget how much he loved her- she had heard him promise her countless times that he would never leave her, but yet here they were; they were no longer Beck&Jade, but simply Beck and Jade.
Beck slowly walked towards his friends, his gaze downcast, as he tried his best to hide the remorse in his eyes.
"So, who's up for some cards?" He asked casually before trying to reclaim his spot next to Cat.
He half-expected a reply from his friends, but was not surprised when the room remained silent. As he sat down, he picked up his cards from the table and looked around, eagerly waiting for someone to make the next move. He glanced over everyone in the group, silently begging someone to say something -anything- to break the tension that lingered in the air.
"Beck," Tori spoke up softly, seeming hesitant. But before she could say anything else she was interrupted.
"Look, I'm fine," he reassured his friends. "Can we just get back to the game?"
After earning hesitant nods from the rest of the group, he tossed in a few chips.
"I call. Cat?"
He patiently waited for the redhead to toss in her bets, but her mind was far from the game. She still couldn't believe what Beck had done, and was upset by how he was treating the situation. She sat with her gaze fixed on the table while she absent-mindedly twirled strands of her vibrant hair, completely oblivious to her friend calling her.
"Cat?" He tried again as he turned to face her.
Snapping out of her reverie, she lightly shook her head as if to clear her thoughts before her innocent eyes bore into Beck's.
"I call," Beck repeated, seeming slightly annoyed. "Are you in, or out?"
Cat glanced between her cards and pile of chips before setting them down on the table.
"I'm out," she announced before pushing her chair back, standing up from her spot.
"Where are you going?" Tori asked, concerned by her friend's action. Although seeming confused at first, Cat's saddened eyes locked with Tori's and she suddenly understood the motives behind her behavior.
She flashed her friend a sad smile before speaking up again. "See you Monday, then?"
Cat quickly nodded before she grabbed her purse off of Tori's couch, and made her way out the door, closing it gently.
Tori let out a sigh as she looked down at her hand. She understood why Cat was upset: Jade was her best friend and it hurt her to see Beck just let her go the way that he did. Tori felt a little upset by it herself, but didn't dare say anything more for fear of upsetting Beck.
All eyes were locked on her as she glanced up from her cards, begging to know about the exchange between the two girls.
"What's wrong with Little Red?" Andre quietly spoke up.
"She's fine," Tori reassured her friends. "She's just past her curfew."
"But we just got here," Robbie chimed in, earning a look from Tori. He cowered back into his seat, dropping the situation. He felt guilty for bringing it up, as the look on Tori's face was enough to let him know that something was definitely wrong, but he was concerned for his friends. It seemed as if they all were, except Beck.
He had let her get to ten, without hesitation even. One little word and Jade West's world came crashing down, leaving her heartbroken and speechless. After the words left her lips and she realized that he wasn't going to come after her, she didn't know where to go, but she knew that she needed to get the hell away from the Vega's- from him.
As she turned away from the door, she noticed the silence that ensued and wondered what was going on inside; she wondered if Beck was as upset as she was by the breakup. Her vision became clouded over with tears as she continued to think about him.
"And this is why I don't trust anybody," she mumbled before sliding into her car. As she started the car she could feel a faint vibrating in her pocket. Half of her hoped it was Beck, and she berated herself for thinking that he actually cared about her. Of course he didn't. If he did, he would have opened the door way before she had gotten to ten- he wouldn't have even let her walk out.
She drove mindlessly around the neighborhood, not knowing where to go. Sure, she could go home, but her parents were out of town and she didn't want to be alone. Not any more than she already was. As she rounded the corner, she subconsciously placed her hand in the empty seat next to her, reaching for Beck's hand. Her stomach churned when she realized that he was gone, and that she would never hold his hand again.
Jade pulled up to an all too familiar house and got out of her car, hoping that someone would be home. She gently knocked on the door and grew impatient when no one answered. Hot tears of hurt and frustration welled in her eyes as she continued knocking, and after a few more minutes she sat down on the porch in defeat. No one was home. She had nowhere left to go.
She remained seated on the front porch with her head in her hands, trying to maintain her composure, when she heard footsteps gently approaching her.
The girl in question carefully lifted her head from her hands and looked up into the concerned eyes of her best friend. She tried desperately to hold herself together, as she hated showing weakness, but the sight of her friend caused her to crumble, and her bottom lip began to quiver in a vain effort to contain her sobs.
"Jadey," Cat sighed as she took in her appearance. She was frightened: she had rarely ever seen Jade this upset.
"Come on, let's go inside," she offered while helping Jade up from her position on the porch.
Jade didn't say a word as she followed Cat into her house, throwing her bag down on the floor.
"Do you want to go upstairs?" Cat whispered, afraid of startling her friend in her fragile state.
Jade managed a weak nod as she allowed Cat to grab her hand and lead her up the stairs to her room. As they entered, Cat turned on her bedside lamp, allowing for a small sliver of light to fill her room. She heard the bed creak as Jade climbed on top of it and she quietly sat down next to her, too afraid to say anything.
The girls sat in an uncomfortable silence for several minutes before Cat carefully reached out to grab Jade's hand, squeezing it lightly. The Goth looked up at her friend, who flashed her a timid smile, and the gesture was enough to let Jade's walls come crumbling down. Cat grew frightened as she watched the tears slip down her friend's face, and she gently wrapped her arms around Jade's trembling figure.
"Jadey," Cat's voice broke as she tried to comfort her friend.
Hearing her special nickname, Jade tightened her grip on her friend and rested her head on her shoulder.
"What am I going to do?" she cried, causing Cat's heart to break. "I-I still love him."
"I know you do," Cat whispered. "Even though he chose to leave, I never will," she reassured her while rubbing small circles on her back.
Jade's frame was wracked with another wave of sobs as she buried her face into Cat's shoulder. The younger girl had no idea what she could say to try to comfort her inconsolable friend, so she sat in silence while continuing to hold onto the sobbing girl.
Cat had never seen Jade in so much pain and she felt as if she would cry just listening to her heart-wrenching sobs. She began humming softly to try to soothe her friend as she began moving side to side in a gentle rocking motion. Jade seemed to calm down almost instantly and within a few minutes her sobs died down into hushed whimpers.
"How could he do this to me?" Jade's pained words broke the silence. "He promised that he would never leave me. Did I make him that miserable?"
"Oh, Jadey," Cat sighed while squeezing her friend tight. "He'll regret it, I know he will. It'll all be okay."
"I still love him," Jade objected, shaking her head. "But he obviously doesn't love me."
Her whimpers dissolved into tears as she began crying once again.
"Shhh, Jadey. I'm here for you, it's okay," Cat tried reassuring her, her voice breaking.
"He still loves you, Jade," she reassured her. "He just needs time to cool down- to think things through. When he stepped away from that door, I could see it in his eyes: he knew that he had just made the biggest mistake of his life. Just give it some time."
Jade pulled back from her friend, exposing the smeared makeup and tears that stained her cheeks.
"You mean it?" she spoke up feebly, rubbing at her red-rimmed eyes.
"I swear on Mr. Purple's life," Cat replied, earning a weak laugh from Jade. "And until then, I'll always be here for you," she smiled at her friend.
Jade returned the smile before pulling her friend in for another hug.
"I don't know what I would do without you, baby girl. Thank you."
"You don't have to thank me, Jadey. That's what best friends are for," she reassured her, letting her cling to her.
Cat's tiny fist beat on the shiny exterior of the RV, rather loudly for it being so early in the morning, too, but she couldn't care less. She was angry; she was frustrated.
The door whipped open moments later, revealing a disheveled looking Beck. Cat felt satisfied as she took in his appearance, realizing that he, too, had an awful night.
"Cat?" his tired voice croaked, confused by her appearance. "It's seven in the morning. What are you doing here?"
Rather than answering his question, Cat brushed past Beck and made her way into his RV without a word.
"Is everything alright?" He asked, his tone filled with concern.
"We need to talk," she replied, seeming rather urgent. This only further worried the Canadian.
"What's going on, baby girl?"
Cat let out a terse laugh at Beck's naivety, and was angered by the use of her special nickname. He had lost all rights to call her his baby girl the second that Jade had walked out the door.
"You know exactly why I'm here," she spat, causing Beck's eyes to widen in surprise.
"I think I have an idea," he admitted quietly before dropping his gaze to the ground.
"How could you do that to her?" Cat questioned, her voice quivering with rage.
Beck quickly looked up at his friend, an incredulous look on his face.
"This isn't just my fault, Cat," he argued. "I was so tired of all of the fighting: it's not healthy, nor is it normal. It felt like she lost interest in our relationship, and we couldn't even have a normal conversation without jumping in on each other; it was exhausting and I couldn't take it anymore."
"So instead of talking it through, you let Jade fall right through the cracks of your broken relationship?"
"I tried talking it through with her!" he objected, his voice beginning to rise. "But you know Jade: she was too stubborn to admit that we had a problem; she hates to express any feeling other than anger or hatred."
Cat shook her head in disbelief before speaking up again.
"I do know Jade. But you obviously don't," she stated matter-of-factly.
Beck furrowed his eyebrows in confusion before arguing once again.
"We dated for three years, Cat. Three whole years. I think I know Jade."
"But you don't," Cat objected, her voice growing softer. "If you would've seen what I saw last night, you would know how upset she truly was. I've never seen Jadey so upset; it was awful."
Beck's eyes filled with remorse as he sat in silence, stunned by Cat's words. His silence was enough to let Cat know that he felt incredibly guilty, and she continued, hoping to let him understand what he had done to her best friend.
"I found her on my front porch when I got home last night. She looked so upset and so…lost. I could tell that she had already been crying. Hell, I knew that she was the minute she walked out the door. But you didn't. You just let her leave, knowing that you would let her get to ten."
"Cat," Beck sighed, feeling extremely guilty for what he had done. However, she ignored him and continued talking.
"She was hysterical, Beck," Cat whispered, upset by her friend's state. "She was so quiet and so fragile: the instant she looked at me, she fell apart. She cried for hours last night and she didn't sleep. Jade's devastated, Beck. So don't think that she didn't care about your relationship, because it seems like she cared about it a hell of a lot more than you."
"Do you think I had an easy night last night?" he asked quietly. "Do you think I just swept it under the rug like no big deal? We dated for three years; she's all I've ever known. How could I just forget all of that within a few hours? As soon as I heard her say ten, I felt terrible. I could hear the crack in her voice, and I wanted nothing more than to whip open that door and hold her in my arms; to apologize to her. I still love her, Cat, and I don't think that I'll ever stop."
Cat let out a sigh as she approached her friend, before placing a gentle hand on his shoulder.
"Do you want to know what she told me last night?" she asked him gently, not wanting to upset him any further. Beck slowly nodded, allowing her to continue.
"She still loves you, Beck. God, I don't know how many times she told me that last night; I lost count. She still loves you and thinks that you don't love her anymore- that you never did."
Beck's heart broke at Cat's words. He had no idea how upset Jade would have been; initially, he had assumed that after the poker game she would meet him at his RV and they would talk things over, just like they did after every other fight. But as she walked away from the door, he knew that this was like no other fight; he knew that this was permanent, and it was the worst mistake he'd ever made.
"How could she think that?" his voice broke. "I've always loved her- she knows that."
"Could you blame her, though? She was always so worried that you would grow tired of her and leave, just like everyone else, but you always reassured her that you would be by her side. You were the one that fixed her, and she was so happy when she was with you; I hadn't seen her genuinely happy in such a long time. But you built her up only to tear her down. You wondered why she didn't trust anyone, even you, but now you know why: she knew that you would leave her. Everyone has, so why would you be any different?"
Beck sighed, trying to maintain his composure. He felt awful: guilty for betraying the love of his life, and disappointed in himself for his lack of faith in Jade; she really did care about him and their relationship.
"I have to talk to her," he demanded, his voice urgent.
Cat shook her head, while flashing him a sad smile.
"She's not going to want to see you; she doesn't want you to see what you did to her."
"I broke her, and now I have to fix her," he replied. "Please, Cat. I need to make things right."
Jade sat huddled in the corner of her best friend's room, staring off blankly into the distance. The heartache that Beck had caused her the previous night hadn't diminished in the slightest, in fact it was worse. She felt as if this were all a dream- a nightmare- in which she would wake up any minute in Beck's RV, his lips brushing against hers. But she couldn't wake up; her nightmare had become a reality: Beck had left her. He never loved her.
She didn't remember falling asleep, or even if she did. She seemed to remember drifting in and out of consciousness, but attributed it to the numbing stupor that had visited her several times over the course of the night. Jade hadn't noticed Cat leave during her unconscious state, but figured that she was downstairs grabbing a bite to eat. Normally she would have called for her, but her voice was hoarse from crying. She would have gone downstairs to check for herself, but her body felt numb-exhausted. So, rather than venturing downstairs, she remained in her fetal position in the center of Cat's bed, relishing the tiniest amount of comfort that came with it.
Jade had lost all track of time: it didn't matter to her anymore. She figured that Cat had only been gone for ten, fifteen minutes, so when the girl quietly entered the room, she was unprepared for the unwelcome visitor that Cat had brought with her.
"Jade," Cat whispered while gently patting the covers. "Are you alright?"
The somewhat relaxing stupor that she had fallen into was shaken loose at the girl's question, and memories from the past night began to fill her head. She slowly nodded, hoping that it would be convincing enough, however the light trembling that had begun to rattle the covers was let Cat know that things were anything but alright.
"Jadey," she sighed. She tugged gently at the covers, revealing her friend's shaken state, and began to second guess Beck's appearance.
"He let me get to ten," she whispered, almost inaudibly.
Cat's eyes filled with sadness, hearing the pain in her friend's voice, and she nodded slowly. The silent confirmation from her friend was enough to remind Jade that this was her new reality: Beck was gone. He had left her; he never loved her.
Her eyes welled with tears as she looked into the redhead's glistening eyes.
"How could he do this to me?" she managed to choke out. "I always knew that he would leave me, but he had me convinced that he was different. But I was right; I knew from the beginning."
Beck watched on from his position in the doorway, and another wave of guilt washed over him as he realized what he had done. Cat turned her attention towards him, making eye contact. Her look was enough to let him know that this wasn't even the half of what she had experienced throughout the night, and he knew that he needed to step in. Quickly.
Cat gently nodded her head, signaling for him to make his way over to his devastated ex-girlfriend. He slowly approached the bed and knelt down at its side, as he hesitantly brushed at the tears trailing down Jade's cheeks. She flinched at his touch and quickly pushed his hand away.
Both friends stared at each other in confusion, not knowing to whom the question was being asked. Assuming that now would be a good time to explain his appearance, Beck tried to speak up.
"No," she objected, before sitting up in the bed.
"Why is he here?" she demanded, looking at Cat.
"I think he needs to explain that," she answered, placing a hand on her shoulder.
"Forcing him to come over isn't going to get us back together."
"Actually," Beck spoke up, "she didn't even want me here. I practically had to beg her to come see you. I have to make things right."
Jade snapped her eyes shut, trying to stop the flow of tears. She didn't want Beck to see any more of the hurt that he had caused her- he didn't deserve the satisfaction.
"I'm gonna leave you two alone," Cat mumbled, hoping that Jade hadn't heard. However Jade's eyes flew open, and went wide with panic.
"Baby girl, please," she begged, her voice thick.
Cat flashed her a tentative smile as she leaned in to give her fragile friend a hug.
"You love him, Jadey. I know you do, so just give him a chance. Everything will be alright."
Jade nodded as Cat released her from her grip, and watched as she made her way out of the room.
After hearing the click of the door, Beck turned to face Jade, a somber look on his face. He sat in an uncomfortable silence, trying to find the words to explain how sorry he truly was, but he was at a loss; no words could repair the damage that he had caused.
"Why?" Jade's voice broke the silence, interrupting Beck's thoughts.
The boy let out a sigh as he carded his hand through his unruly hair, a sign that he was clearly uncomfortable. He hesitantly reached out his hand, holding Jade's hand tightly in his own. She flinched at the touch and made a feeble attempt to pull it away.
"Please don't," she requested while turning her attention away from the intruder.
Beck's heart broke at her gesture: it had taken him weeks, months, even, to earn Jade's trust- to earn the right to touch her, and all that had been lost within ten short seconds- ten seconds that he wished could be taken back.
"I never wanted to break up with you," he admitted quietly. Jade flinched at his words, and Beck continued, hoping to regain her attention.
"I was just so tired of all the fighting- of the pointless, exhausting bickering over the most trivial things. I missed the relationship that we used to have: where we could talk to each other without raising our voices, and where our conversations would end in tears from laughter, not hurt. I wanted our relationship to be stable again, just like it used to be, but I didn't know what to do. So, rather than trying to talk to you about it like I should have, I figured that it would be best to give each other some space to try to remember why we fell in love with each other from the beginning.
"I thought it would work," he explained, his voice falling to a whisper, "but letting you walk out that door was the worst decision I've ever made. When I heard you say ten, I knew it was over; I knew that what I had done would leave damage beyond repair. The thought of not having you as my girlfriend was surreal, and I don't think that I'll ever be used to it. I don't think I will ever be able to express how sorry I am, Jade, and it absolutely kills me."
By this point, Jade's eyes were fixed on the sheets in front of her, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. She knew how upset he was, and how truly sorry he was, but he had lost her trust; he promised that he would never leave her, and all of that changed within ten short seconds.
Beck was growing worried by Jade's silence. He knew that she was deep in thought and it only worried him further, as she was either thinking about accepting or rejecting his apology. He figured the latter, and wouldn't blame her if she wouldn't forgive him- if he couldn't even forgive himself, why should Jade?
"Beck," she whispered into the silence, her heart aching at the mention of his name.
The boy in question fixed his gaze on Jade, noticing that her eyes remained downcast. He contemplated reaching for her hand again, encouraging her to continue, but he didn't want to upset her any further.
"I'm sorry," she apologized, taking Beck by surprise.
"Why are you sorry?" he asked, completely shocked by the apology. Jade rarely ever uttered those two words, so he knew that her apology was sincere.
"I was the reason we fought," she admitted, "I noticed that we had kind of lost our spark, and whenever I saw you with someone else I couldn't help but feel jealous. I thought that you were tired of our relationship- of me. I thought that you had found someone prettier, someone with emotion, someone like…Vega. It absolutely killed me, but I didn't know how to tell you. I didn't want you to be upset, or think that I was just on another jealous rant, but I guess that didn't work out as well as I had hoped."
Beck sighed. He had no idea about any of this. He knew that Jade had been jealous of other girls, especially Tori, but could never understand why. He just assumed that she liked to assert her possession, which was true to some extent, but he never knew how insecure she had felt.
"Jadelyn West," he started, "you are the most beautiful girl in the world, and no one could ever replace you; you're my number one girl, and the most important person in my life. I know you think that you don't deserve me, but in reality I don't deserve you. I wake up every morning wondering how I became so lucky as to be able to call you my girlfriend, and I don't want to lose you. I don't ever want to put you through this again."
Jade nodded, taking in Beck's words, however she still wasn't fully convinced.
"When we stopped talking, it was unbearable," she spoke up. You're the only one that understands me- you're my best friend. I figured that any talking would be better than none at all, so I tried picking fights to get your attention. I know it was a childish thing to do, but I thought that it would work. Towards the end, though, I began to think that the silence was far better than what we were going through.
"And I was right," she muttered, heartbroken. "I knew that we were through when I walked out the door, but some part of me still believed that you would come after me. I didn't think you'd even let me leave, let alone get to ten," her voice cracked at the end.
Beck took note of Jade's crumbling demeanor and wanted nothing more than to comfort her. Even though she had denied it earlier, he knew that she needed him, and so he carefully placed a finger under her chin, forcing her gaze to lock with his. Surprisingly enough, she didn't flinch nor did she try to turn away, but rather let Beck's eyes bear into hers. Her eyes became wet with unshed tears and she blinked furiously to keep them at bay, but it was no use. As the first tear began to fall, Beck gently brushed it away as he continued to stare into Jade's glistening eyes.
"Do you love me?" She managed to choke out, allowing for the tears to fall faster.
Rather than utter a response, Beck carefully cupped Jade's tear-stained cheek, tenderly caressing it as he felt his body lean into hers. He expected her to pull away, but watched as she, too, had begun to lean in. He placed a gentle kiss to her cheek, silently asking for her permission to go further, and as a response found Jade's lips lingering against his.
She felt Beck's lips brush against hers and she leaned further into the kiss, allowing for their lips to move in sync- in one perfect motion. The sensation was one that she had missed dearly, and with each movement she felt more at ease- more at home. Beck's lips worked against hers, slowly and sweetly, in a reassuring manner. He couldn't believe that he had almost lost this, the love of his life, and wanted to prove to her that he would never let her leave again.
He slowly pulled away and broke the kiss, all the while continuing to caress her face. With a smile, he looked sincerely into her eyes and uttered the three words that Jade had been longing to hear:
"I never stopped."
There you have it :D Let me know what you think! Like it? Dislike it? Advice/suggestions for future one shots? Let me know :)