A/N: I DON'T OWN SHIT! IT'S OH SO SAD BUT OH SO TRUE!

Chandrakanta FanFiction is my wonderful beta; she is the best and makes this oh so pretty. Kasi TeamAllTwilight and Jennifer K. are my pre readers, they awesome like that! I just wanted to say thank you to all of you that have reviewed, and that I love them all! If you have a question, then ask and I will try my hardest to answer it! Kim bb, love you and thank you for all your help!

I don't know what time it was but the sound of loud pounding woke me up from a very restful sleep. To make matters worse, whoever was making all the damn noise was also scaring JD and now he was barking and howling. I threw the covers off and slid out of bed to go see what the fuck was going on, and where the hell Edward was at. I knew he could not possibly be sleeping through that much noise.

As I opened my door, I saw an almost naked Edward coming down the hall with water still dripping off him and almost swallowed my tongue. Dear God, the tattoos on this man could bring me to my knees. He moved too fast for me to see more than bright colors and dark black lines swirl all along his chest and shoulder; when he turned the corner, I could see some on his back, too, but not much.

I followed him down the hall and around the corner to the door where I saw Emmett standing there with a big goofy ass smile on his face, like he hadn't just woken up the whole damn neighborhood with his pounding. Edward looked pissed and like he was about to kick Em's face in, so I decided that I should be the one to step in before that could happen.

"What the fuck, Emmett?! All that damn banging scared the shit out of me and JD. It sounded like the fucking five-oh were at the door," I shouted at him while walking closer to the door.

Edward turned and told me to take care of it before he walked back to his room. "Em, I am only going to tell you this once, so you better listen really, really fucking close. DO NOT EVER WAKE ME UP LIKE THAT AGAIN! I will taze your ass if you do. You like bacon, 'cause that is what tazed balls smell like, mister—"

I was cut off by Emmett's lips. I guess he had heard enough of my yelling and decided to shut me up the best way possible. He just grabbed me by the back of the head, pulled me to him, and then he started tickling me. I wasn't sure how to feel about that, but ok, if he wants to play dirty then I can play dirty. I reached up and seized his nipple, twisting the hell out of it until he was on his knees and about to cry.

"What the hell, Emmett?! You go from kissing me to tickling me? Why would you do that? It doesn't making any sense. That did nothing but confuse me and hurt you. I also don't like to be interrupted, Em, so next time you know what can and will happen if you do. Now, did you bring breakfast? I am starving all of a sudden," I asked him as he looked up at me in awe while he was still on his knees. You would think he had never been put in his place in his entire life.

Before he could answer, Edward came around the corner and started laughing his pretty little head off at us. I'm not sure what was so funny so I just shrugged my shoulders and turned back to Em. "Well, did you bring food or not, you big grizzly bear?"

He just smiled that big ass smile of his and pointed to the bags that were on the table right next to the door. There were four big bags full of stuff. I took two and walked into the kitchen to unload them on to the table and see what he had brought us to eat.

The first thing that I saw was two huge, ripe creole tomatoes and a head of lettuce. The next thing I pulled out is a box that was warm and smelled of butter and bread. I opened it up to see a dozen croissants that seemed to be freshly baked.

The boys walked in while I grasped the second bag and pulled out two containers. The first one had a ton of thick sliced ham and bacon, the second had sliced cheese—well, it looked like three different kinds of sliced cheese—sliced cucumbers, and avocados. Oh, hell yeah, we're making our own breakfast sandwiches! Yum, yum. I went to pull the other two bags from Em but he wouldn't let me have them. For the life of me, I couldn't understand why.

"What the hell, Em? Are you not going to share that food, you big ass baby? What am I going to do with you, hun?" I asked him with a little bit of an attitude but really, what the fuck, how old is he again?

"Um, well, you see, it's not food in here and I am not so sure how you are going to take what is in here. I mean, you might like it; hell, I like it and I really, really want to see you in it," Em explained with a big goofy smile on his face.

"Ok, well, give it here and let me see what it is and if I can work with it or not. I'm not picky, Em, I swear, and lord knows I don't have anything of my own at the moment since some douchebag wanted to play with matches. Come on, it can't be that bad, right?" I asked him, but somehow I got the feeling that it just might be that bad by the look Edward gave me.

Fuck! He better cut it out or I will not be held accountable for the raping he is about to get. Sexy PEL with the rings in them! Yum, yum. I shook my head and cleared it of all thoughts of Edward before turning to Em with my hand held out. He holds them out like he was going to give me the two bags that he held, but as I reached for them, he smirked and dumped them on to the table instead.

I looked at the big ass pile of clothes on the table and it looked like someone had ripped up a rainbow flag. I reached over and picked up the first thing my hand touched. It was bright pink and had strings hanging off of one side like…no, he better not have!

"Em, if this is what I think it is, I really might just taze your balls. What the fuck were you thinking? A bikini? Really, Em, you would have to sew two of these triangles together just to cover my fucking nipples, and don't even get me started on the bottoms. They are so fucking small it's going to look like my ass ate them for lunch!" I yelled at him but before I could go on I heard Edward moan.

I whipped my head around so fast that things blurred and I pointed my finger at him. "Don't you start with that moaning bullshit or I will fuck you so hard you will be limping in to work this afternoon, you hear me?" I told him in my hardest voice then turned back to Em in enough time to catch him palming his dick. "Em, stop touching it before you go blind. Now, have you brought me anything I can actually wear out in public without looking like Honey Boo Boo's my stylist?" I asked, though I'm almost positive that the answer is going to be no.

"Well, I did get you a dress and this thing that is supposed to stretch over your tits nice and tight. Does that count?" Em asked me with a smile like I would be happy about that.

"Em, I am not trying to be a bitch, I swear, it's just I don't want to look like some big ass tranny when I go out. Now, you boys are going to finish getting the breakfast ready and I am going to go look through all the things you bought me, Em, and find something to wear, ok? Sound good?" I asked and they nodded just like the good boys they are. I scooped up all the colorful bits of fabric and walk back to my room, praying that I could find something that worked.

Ok guys! Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed it. Now if you are looking for something else too read please go check out Kim Ginsberg's new fic called s/9516164/1/High-School-Crushes-and-Happily-Ever-A fter she is writing it for me for my birthday! She is awesome and you will love it! The second one is called s/9458588/1/Sweet-Temptations by Lillian Broderick and this one will have you begging her for more! I know I do!