Steve Grant Rogers is many things, he's strong, brave, the leader of the Avengers, a soldier, America's Golden boy, kind, charming and sweet. But what people don't know is that he created a kind, charming and sweet persona by imitating others. He was born lacking empathy and was horrible at social interactions.
But over the years he created a fake Steve, the Steve that everybody wanted. His mother wanted a brave little trooper, so Steve was brave. When he joined the Army they wanted him to be strong so he agreed to the serum. When he would help people they wanted him to be kind so Steve observed others to become, 'kind' and he did.
So depending on what the others around him needed, Steve modified himself. He had always craved social interaction but nobody wanted the Steve who he was underneath, the Steve who was diagnosed with Aspergers syndrome as a small child.
Nobody in the Avengers knew about his Aspergers, accept for Fury and Coulson. He knew that people with Aspergers always excelled in one subject and his was art.
Since he was quite sickly as a child, he would immerse himself in any kind of art he could find. It became almost an obsession until he preferred art to people. He had managed to hide his talent but whenever he was in his room alone, art is the only thing he ever did.
After he came to the 21st century he was put on medication, there was no real treatment for Aspergers but he took 'Intuniv' for hyperactivity, 'Zyprexa' for repetitive behaviors, and 'Revia' also for repetitive behaviors. Repetitive behaviors were his biggest problem, besides his change issues.
He absolutely hated change, the night after he woke up from being frozen he had a meltdown. He ripped at his hair, the walls, screaming the entire time while rolling on the floor. He had the same reaction after the invasion. He really disliked change but he really hated the Meltdowns. They didn't happen a lot but when they did...they were bad, really bad.
Steve had been lounging on the couch, observing a crappy television show that he had no chance of understanding when JARVIS spoke from above him.
"Captain Rogers, Sir is requesting your presence in the lab."
JARVIS informed him and Steve gave the ceiling a quick smile as he got up from the couch and began to trudge down the steps to the lab.
He answered and focused on walking down the several flights of stairs. When he finished walking down to the lab he saw Tony leap up from working on why looking like a smoking pile of scrap metal and started waving his hands frantically. He looked extremely nervous and was biting his bottom lip hard.
"Uhhhh...Capsicle? Well, it was an accident I swear! But umm...your bike kinda got trashed."
Tony whispered, nervously and gestured to the pile of scrap metal he'd been working on. Steve just froze and looked at the pile of scraps, numbly. He just forced a smile when he looked at Tony.
"But you're fixing it right?"
Steve asked, and Tony nodded so Steve just shrugged loosely.
"Well that's fine then, thanks for telling me."
Steve turned on his heels and marched right back up the stairs. Still not entirely believing what had happened. It didn't hit him until after a while, he knew it wouldn't. Steve wandered back up the stairs and into the kitchen where he ran into Bruce. Who smiled at him as he dropped a tea bag into his cup.
"So where are Natasha and Clint?"
Steve asked and Bruce shrugged, quietly.
"Natasha's out with Pepper and I'm not sure where Clint is, probably crawling around the rafters somewhere."
Bruce hummed contently and Steve nodded.
"Well, I'll be down in the gym if you need me!"
He explained before walking out of the kitchen and going down to the gym only he seemed to ever use. He felt his mind clearing as he upper-cutted several punching bags. He only felt calm in here, in the gym. Where he could attack bags to his hearts content, he only felt this kind of euphoria when he was drawing something really challenging.
After a while he was soaked in sweat and grinning like a madman as he stretched out his muscles. He left the gym soon after, to only be greeted by a room full of Avengers all piled on one couch. He could've laughed at the awkward positions they had all adopted in order to squish into the limited space of the couch. Tony leapt to his feet when he saw him and crossed his arms as he walked over.
"Okay, spill it Capsicle. Nobody would take getting their bike trashed that happily."
Tony snapped, raising an eyebrow at Steve who just shrugged, putting on his oblivious face.
"Really? I know your going to fix it, so why bother to get mad?"
Steve answered, walking over to the couch and plopping himself down between Bruce and Thor. Tony just sputtered in confusion before rolling his eyes and sitting back down on the couch. Clint snatched up the remote and turned on the TV.
"Okay guys, it's time for movie night! Sorry we forgot to tell you, Cap.."
Clint said, sheepishly as he turned to Steve who just smiled kindly and shook his head.
"It's fine, Clint. What're we watching?"
Steve asked, excitedly and Clint grinned right back at the Captain's response. He had figured that the Super soldier would at least be a little annoyed with him but he seemed to be undisturbed. So Clint just shrugged it off as a save on his part.
"Lord of the Rings!"
Clint cried and Steve smiled at the movie choice but really, he couldn't care less. But nobody else on the team knew that. He was just perky, happy, kind Steve and nobody ever saw anything different.
When the movie was over and everyone had parted ways, Steve went up to his room and into his bathroom. He relieved himself, before digging in his medical cabinet for his three multi-colored pills. He easily popped the child safe tops and soon had swallowed the stupid pills from sink water he had cupped in his hands.
That's how he fell asleep that night, expecting the horror that would greet him tomorrow. He knew he was going to have a Meltdown, he just knew and he had to get away from the team somehow.
Steve woke up angry the next morning, he also had a pounding migraine so that didn't help matters at all. Everything made him angry, the way his bed looked after he'd woken up, the way his clothes touched his skin. Everything.
He ran two hands through his blond hair making it stick up at odd angles before he threw open his door. He stumbled and trudged down the stairs, gripping hard on the railing that was keeping him from falling with his pounding headache. Steve remembered walking towards the kitchen because he was hungry.
As he made his trek towards the kitchen he body slammed into Tony who was leaving the kitchen. Probably to go back down to his lab, and Steve started in on him.
"Watch where you're going Tony!"
He snapped but inside he was saying..'please no...no..no..no.'. Tony looked at Steve in surprise.
"Cap? Are you okay?"
Tony asked, resting a hand on his shoulder. Steve instantly slapped the hand away and glared at Tony.
"And shave the dying animal off your face before I see you again!"
He growled and shoved past Tony to walk into the kitchen where Bruce was looking in the fridge, Thor was munching on some pop-tarts, and Natasha and Clint were talking at the table. They all looked up as he entered and most gave a friendly smile but Steve didn't smile back. His eyes were glued to the table where the placemats were all different colors.
"Fix them! Fix them now! The blue goes with the blue, the red goes with the red, and the green goes with the green! Are you idiots!? Do you not see what's wrong! Fix them! Fix them! Fix them! Why did you mess them up?! Fix them!"
He screamed, pointing a finger at the table angrily. All the Avengers in the room looked at him slack jawed. What had happened to Steve?
Tony had been standing in the door frame and he glared at Steve.
"What the hell, Capsicle?! Are you PMSing or some other shit?"
Tony snapped, putting two hands on Steve's shoulders and shoving him away. That's what broke it, the touching.
"DON'T TOUCH ME! DON'T TOUCH ME!"
Steve screamed, yanking at his clothes, his hair, whatever on his body had he could reach. He started crying while he was screaming and he was biting his bottom lip so hard that he tasted the rusty tang of blood. Tony and the rest of the Avengers were looking at him like he'd grown a second head. Which in a way he had.
At this point he was on the floor, rocking back and forth and making a keening noise in the back of his throat.
"Steve? Are you alright, Steve?"
Bruce asked, gently. Steve just looked at the floor or at the wall, nothing but the people in the room, his senses had started to go haywire. He kept hearing sounds like gunshots so he threw his hands over his ears tightly. A tiny bit of blood from his lip spilling out of the side of his mouth.
Steve finally in his exhausted state curled into a ball on the floor and stopped moving entirely. An explanation finally dawned in Bruce's mind and he turned to the Avengers.
"He's having a Meltdown. We need to get him somewhere dark and silent so he can sleep it off."
Bruce ordered and Thor hurried over to basically pick the super soldier up and off the floor and he carried him towards Steve's room. With Bruce in the front and the rest of the Avengers trailing behind.
The moment they were in Steve's overly organized room, Bruce made Thor set the super soldier on the bed and both him and Tony hurried towards his bathroom. Where Bruce rummaged in his medicine cabinet before pulling out three small bottles.
"Hmmm...as I thought, Intuniv, Zyprexa and Revia."
Bruce mused to himself before going back into Steve's room and placing the pill bottles on his nightstand. Then he ushered out the Avengers and turned off the lights, making sure Steve was safe and secure before he had to face the world again.
"What was that all about?"
Clint asked as soon as they were far enough from Steve's room. Bruce sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose.
"Steve's an Aspie."
Bruce answered softly and Tony gasped audibly. He knew what Aspergers was, they had thought he had it until they realized he was just naturally gifted and sarcastic.
"High functioning Autism?"
Tony asked and Bruce nodded, realization dawned in Clint's and Natasha's faces but Thor still looked confused.
"What is this Austin you speak of?"
Thor asked and Bruce shook his head.
"No, it's Autism. Autism is when a person can't communicate as well as they want to and sometimes they go off by themselves and just stay safe in their own minds. It's a brain development disorder. But Aspergers is a high functioning autism which means Steve probably had to develop his communication skills by watching others around him. People with Aspergers can have normal lives accept for occasional 'Meltdowns' in an adverse reaction to stress or change. What you just saw was a bad Meltdown."
Bruce explained and Tony's eyes widened.
"Oh shit, his bike! I accidentally destroyed his motorcycle and he was fine with it! Was that the reason that this happened?"
Tony whispered and Bruce nodded, eyes downcast.