Hey Zombies – A Hey Arnold! Fan fiction


Journal Entry #22; August 2nd 2002

We won. The last of our problems were over and we came back happy with smiles on our faces. Life was finally beginning anew, and things looked great. For a while I started to miss Helga calling me football head. All the mind games we played with each other and all the times we looked and hated one another. It took a summer in San Lorenzo for me to realize where my heart truly belonged. We flew back with my dad's friend Eduardo and his plane. My parents swore to me they'd never leave my side again. I knew they were telling the truth. They set up an office in Mr. Smith's old room, keeping in touch with Eduardo with beepers given to them by Big Bob Pataki, out of gratitude for bringing his daughter home. Although I specifically angrily remember him calling her "Olga" when they reunited after we came back. But I decided to over look it. I see where I am now, how things are back to normal, how my parents are by my side again. I can now say; I'm home.

Chapter 1

The flashlight clicked on. Even with its brightness, Eugene couldn't see a thing; nothing of value for that matter. Wind howled against the small basement window as Eugene panned his flashlight from right to left. The shelves were practically empty. It was not a good sign for the oncoming weeks, especially with four people needing sustenance. Eugene closed the door and followed the path out of the basement and back onto the main floor of Sunset Arms. Harold and Stinky were in the living room. The walls were cracked, paint started to wear out and the floorboards creaked with every step Eugene took. It gave Harold and Stinky no surprise to see him,

"Well Eugene? Where we at on supplies?" Stinky asked,

"Sorry guys, we're just about out of food. There's maybe two gallons of water left and three cans of pineapple cocktail. At this rate, we're going to be out of supplies in four days."

"What about that meat?! The beef we cooked outside two days ago?!" Harold bantered.

"Harold, the power's out. It wasn't going to stay good for long in that fridge down there. I know Arnold said we should save it, but he was just wanting to give us hope. I'm sure of it."

"Eugene, can you just keep your trap shut and never say 'sure' again?" Stinky suggested, "Your optimism's startin to get on mah nerves."

Eugene's forehead scrunched downward and his eyebrows raised pitifully, "Aw come on guys. It's not that bad. We've been here for two weeks. I mean Harold, it's exactly like the time we were in a tree!"

"I thought we were never talk about that again or I was gonna pound ya!" Harold raised his voice angrily, his fist tightened with knuckles crackling.

"Come on Eugene, that was ten years ago, we're grown up now." Said Stinky,

"Yea, with flesh eating sprinter freaks out to get us!" Harold added.

"Besides, have you ever thought to yourself, maybe it's time to check out? Kick the bucket?"

"Be at shalom with my brothers." Harold said.

"Harold, would you mind keepin' your religious superstitions to yourself?" Stinky responded to Harold.

"It got me through my bar mitzvah, it can keep me going in a zombie apocalypse!" Harold angrily replied.

Eugene interrupted, "Now fellas, how could you be so quick to give up? We've gone this long, why shouldn't we go for another day longer? Any day now, the soldie-"

"That's it! I'm kicking your ass Eugene!" Harold slammed out of his chair, ready to slam Eugene into the ground. Every step shook the floorboards.

"Everybody be QUIET!" yelled a voice from the kitchen.

Arnold put his pen down and took a quick glance over what he had written, "Journal entry #46, July 17, 2012. I thought we had won, the last of our problems were over and we'd go home happy with smiles on our faces. I thought I was finally home. My parents swore we'd never come apart again. Helga swore we'd always be at eachothers' side. And here we are, trapped in my once true home, now a destroyed wreck. Ten years is not enough time to catch up with my life. I wasn't finished before the madness happened. My friends and neighbors could be dead and waltzing around right outside my door, I may never see Helga, or my parents, or I could be forced to kill them if I saw them one last time. I've decided now was not the time to give up hope. I have a plan, and Eugene, Harold, and Stinky are going to listen. I know it'll work."

Ten minutes later, Arnold had Harold, Eugene, and Stinky sitting in silence across from each other, pondering what Arnold had just told them.

"I duno Arnold. You really think that'll work?"

"It has to, they're drawn to any sort of motion. It's been almost a month and we've had no activity on this street. They're getting hungry." Arnold responded.

"But it's a fight or flight plan Arnold, if we get caught in the wind, we're done for." Said Eugene.

"That's a chance we'll have to take." Arnold said, everybody sat in silence, "Look, I've been planning this for about four days now. I'm sorry I haven't brought it up until now but I didn't want to give you guys false hope. But there's no question about it for our situation now. We're dying. And if we don't act, we're going to die here, in my destroyed home."

"Arnold. It's hard to understand, but this ain't your home no more. We're all here to survive, not make irrational decisions." Stinky said.

"When your family's been taken away from you, irrational is the only way you can think." Arnold responded.

"But we could die if we mess up. I don't wanna die!" Harold said whiney.

"You're not gonna die Harold. Before this madness, I've seen you work out. You've run up and down 33rd street six times in one hour and look how slim you've gotten! How can you not out run flesh eating zombies?" Arnold rebuttled.

"Well for one thing Arnold, I didn't have flesh eating zombies out to get me when I was burning my fat!" Harold responded.

"I for one think it's a great plan!" Eugene chimed in.

"Shut up Eugeeeeene." Harold murmured.

"Look Harold, it won't be as challenging as you think it is. If Stinky's truck is still there, he can hotwire it for us while you keep the ones on the street busy. When you hear us get the truck started, get to Gerald Field lot and we'll pick you up. I promise you, swear by my life that you will be safe." Said Arnold, everybody sat in silence, pondering,

"Look, this is our street, and we know how our street works. If we can't execute this plan, than this wasn't our home to begin with. But we've been here for twenty years, as long as we've been alive. After all this time, I finally had a home, with people I love. Richtofen took that away from me with his greed and selfishness. He took it from all of us. It was just like Scheck. He wanted to make the world a better place but at the cost of our home. We fought back, and we won. This time around, we need to fight twice as hard. Now what do you guys say?"


"I'd say you're as crazy as you were ten years ago Arnold." Harold said blandly. Arnold started to droop his head out of loss of hope, "But like Gerald always said, you're a bold kid." Harold said again with a smile.

Arnold started to glow again, and things started to look up, "Come on," he said, "Let's go get find the rest of our family."

Eugene went back down to the basement and grabbed the cans and water jugs. As he brought them upstairs, he walked past Stinky whom was rummaging through the closet till he found his shotgun and the shells in a separate red box.

Harold was in the living room, tying his shoe laces on his Reeboks, his heart pumping. Arnold came into the room, "Doing ok Harold?"

"Yeah I'm ok. Just nervous, not ready to die, you know?" Harold said.

"I know Harold. But understand that when we find our friends out there, you will be hailed a hero for helping us escape this death trap." Arnold said. Harold smiled and looked back down at his shoes. "We're heading out in fifteen." Arnold said, raising his voice a little.

When the time came, it was Arnold, Eugene, Stinky, and Harold at the door. Stinky had the shotgun pumped and ready to go. Eugene, the duffle bag of supplies in his right hand, and Arnold at the door handle, holding the last piece of the barrier he had torn down that was previously put up.

"Ok Harold, ready? Make no mistake. This is fight or flight. Live or die." Arnold said.

"I know Arnold. Let's do this." Harold said.

"Ok." Arnold breathed out a sigh of tension, "One." The others started to shuffle their feet. "Two." Harold's lip quivered, he thought of Rhonda for a second, her black hair, before the thought was gone. Arnold shouted.

"Three! Go!"










To be continued in Chapter 2