My life is a WHAT?!

Author's Note: This first page is a run through of what I thought was a cool idea made up by different authors who went different directions with them like: Fighting and winning to level up and Having sex with a massive amount of women. I am going to have naruto need to do fighting simply because I can't write lemons for shit :D!

I also don't own Naruto, he's the property of Kishimoto.

Hello Naruto Uzumaki, I am the creator of what your life is now…a game. In this game you will go through life as yourself and discover your strengths and weaknesses as well as love and heartbreak. There is nothing I can do about the love of another towards yourself. All I can do is influence you in the direction that I think would be best for you. However, I can give you Tips and Advice when you need it such as: Where can I get information on chakra control? This, I one of the many questions that you can write in this book. The Text that you write down in the book on a blank page will disappear when your question is finished, so do not worry about running out of room in the book to write your thoughts.

There are Save Locations around the world that you can use to respawn at. When you Save, your Skills and Basic Information also Save meaning that when you do Respawn, you will have the same skills as when you Saved. Tip: make sure to Save frequently.

The following is your basic information, your Level, and your Skill Sets. You will be given 20 -points to put in whatever place you want them to. However, once your points are in that Skill Set, they are there forever so choose wisely and think before using them. Tip: be sure to go study at the Library on subjects such as Tactics and Strategy (or find Shikamaru, his IQ is over 200) and anatomy, along with what other things you wish to study.

Basic Information

Name: Naruto Uzumaki_Namikaze (Last name Unavailable)

Age: 12

Cash: $300 (1,500 in the bank)

Level: 5/100 (0/2,500)


Skill points Available: 20

Taijutsu: 5 (Styles are Available to learn)

Ninjutsu: 10 (Must learn about element affinities to learn elemental Ninjutsu)

Genjutsu: 0 (Learn about Genjutsu to Unlock)

Kenjutsu: 0 (Learn about Kenjutsu to Unlock)

Fuinjustu: 0 (Learn about Fuinjutsu to Unlock)

Kinjustu: 5 (This area is affected differently due to the amount of stress it puts on the Player. NOTE: Kinjustu Stat points can only be given every 5 Level Ups, however, 5 points have been granted to you, but will not take effect until the Achievement: (MY FIRST KINJUSTU!) Is unlocked.

Chakra Level: 60

Chakra Control: 10

Stealth: 50

Speed: 50

Endurance: 85

Intelligence: 5 (the higher your intelligence, the higher Level of comprehending and creating tactics)

Perks (when perks are unlocked they stay on you until they are deactivated

Double EXP: 0 (10 points needed to permanently unlock)

More perks available upon Level 10

Jutsu: Kawarimi, Henge, Orioke no Jutsu

Naruto stared at the book that had appeared before his eyes on his nightstand. He had just woken up when a blinding flash of light came into the room.

"What. The. Hell?" He continued staring at the book before grabbing it and sitting cross legged on his bed and reading the contents of the book that had his jaw drop. "MY LIFE IS A WHAT?!"

The book flipped to the first blank page before making words on it's own.

Your life is a game, Uzumaki.

Naruto narrowed his eyes at the words as he began to think about what this could mean, but before he could say anything a pen materialized on his bed before more words came up.

Remember that you need to write down what you want to say or I can't answer your questions.

With his eyes still narrowed, naruto picked up the pen and started writing. "How is my life a game?"

To put it into simple terms…I'm bored.

"Then, why me of all people?

Once again, to put it simply. I wanted to. I could have chosen the Uchiha which I can still do by the way and just erase your memory of us ever having this conversation and of this book. But I wont because I chose you…unless you want me to leave.

"No, it's fine I just… I just thought you were just wanting to screw with my life."

I don't need to. You've done a good job of that yourself.


I did not say that it was a bad thing. You could say that you are a clean slate and can start from scratch with your skills. Which some people would kill for.

"Then do you mind if I ask you some questions about my skills?"


"then here is my first. Why is my intelligence so low?"

You skip class every other day and you do not pay attention while in it, and you also don't try to study while outside of class.

"so if I were to start studying?"

Then your intelligence would raise a certain amount of experience points in order for you to Level Up. Not to say that just studying would make you stronger, you would need to exercise and spar in order to gain those Skills.

"I see…am I able to learn from you?"

Not completely to where you gain everything from me as I can only unlock one skill for you. Do you wish to unlock a skill now or wait and see if you find something better?

Naruto sat there for a good five minutes before writing in the book again. "Are you able to answer questions that may or may not tell me which skills are better than others?"

not exactly. I can only tell what the skills are. You are the one who needs to determine which skill is best for you.

"I understand."

Very well.

Genjutsu is the ability to create and dispel illusions cast on you, the world around you, your enemy or your ally. This skill can be useful to mask your approach on an enemy or mask an entire army of allies when marching on the enemy.

Kenjutsu is the ability to wield weapons of all classes ranging from the standard katana, to a bow and arrow, to a chain and scythe, to everything in between. This skill can be useful for engaging an enemy who uses weapons as their main skill, while it does take a while to build up this skill, many say it is worth having as a great backup in case of chakra exhaustion.

Fuinjutsu is the ability to create, modify or destroy seals. A seal is a combination of ink and chakra to make a complex array of lines that make a scripture able to do abilities ranging from a simple storage seal to absorbing elemental jutsu.

Kinjutsu, even though you have this already (mainly due to the fact that you have created one – the sexy jutsu) Is the ability to create and use forbidden jutsu. This can be both useful and harmful to the user. It's Useful by having perfected certain jutsu to help the users training or fighting. Harmful due to the extreme amount of stress made on the body and mind. If unlocked, make sure to rest each time you use any Kinjutsu.

which skill would you prefer?

The blonde reread the explanation of the skills and thought hard about what he wanted to pick. "Ok so I got a potential mid-range and long-range choice. A close-range choice. A sealing method. And some forbidden shit." He then began to think of any advantages that could come with the choices that were mentioned and made his choice.

"Is it possible to put seals with any of those choices?"


"Then I choose Fuinjutsu."

Very well…

Fuinjutsu Unlocked- you are now able to put SP into the Fuinjutsu Category!

It is done…

"can you give me suggestions on what I need to learn the most to become stronger?"

I can tell you what you need to learn but not how or where to learn…

I would suggest learning chakra control being made the first priority. And your Taijutsu should be worked on as well as your clothing…

Naruto became indignant to having his clothes made fun of. "OI. What is wrong with my clothing?!"

You will become a liability not only on the battlefield, but also on infiltration and assassination missions. It is best that you get clothing that are dark in color such as: Black, Gray, Dark Blue, Dark Red. These should be good enough for you to not only keep yourself out as a liability, but also keep your allies from having to worry about you giving away your positions.

Naruto winced when told that his clothing could get him and others killed. While the book did not say that he and his allies would be harmed or killed…it did imply the deaths of comrades, and the blonde did not want that. "I see."

I did not wish to be rude about it. I merely wished to get a point across. Do you know what that point is?

"Yes." Naruto began to think of places that sold shinobi clothing. 'Well there is that one shop two blocks over. I think they sell weapons too if the weapons in the window were any indication.'

"There is a clothing/weapons shop for shinobi a little ways from here. I could go there and get dark clothing."

May I suggest something?

"Of course."

I would suggest investing in some armor while you are there…I have taken the liberty of adding several thousands of dollars to your savings…

Naruto's eyes widened. 'Wait…WHAT!?'

This amount should be enough for what you need for several months…$150,000…should you require more there will be safe guards in place to keep you from just going into the bank and withdrawing it all and then gaining more…

He sweat dropped at having the plan shot down before even taking off.

We shall talk more later naruto.

"What? But I still have questions!"

Your teacher is coming up the stairs…

"Uh oh."


Naruto shot up from his bed and grabbed a different book he had gotten from the Hokage a few years ago. The "Way of The Shinobi" was given to him as a present when naruto asked the man if he could become a ninja. As he was just getting back to sitting down on his bed there was a pounding on his door and some yelling. With an exaggerated sigh naruto made a show of getting up noisily and stomping his way towards the door with the book in hand.

Opening it with a loud "WHAT!" caused the teacher to flinch a bit due to not expecting such a response, so the teacher decided to question the boy on his behavior. "Why are you screaming at your teacher?" He asked with unhidden annoyance.

Naruto returned it with his own bit of irritation. "You are stomping up the stairs and then beating on my door while trying to scream in my ear THROUGH said door while on the other side of the apartment which will anger my landlord into possibly raising my rent AGAIN! What the hell do you think I'm going to do?" he finished with narrowed eyes.

The teacher only replied with anger. "YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN IN CLASS AN HOUR AGO!"

Naruto raised an eyebrow and turned toward the nearest clock and then narrowing his eyes once more while looking into the teachers eyes. "Mizuki, it is six o'clock in the morning. Classes don't start for another hour and a half. So again what is your fucking excuse?"

Mizuki's face twisted in rage before turning calm once more. "You should learn to respect your elders Naruto."

"And you should learn how not to piss off the populace with your damn screeching." He said with unbidden sarcasm. "Now if you have nothing left to say. Get the fuck out of this apartment complex before I call the landlord and have you thrown out, I will see you in class." And with that, Naruto shut the door in Mizuki's face not seeing his face going red with complete rage.

Naruto then walked through his little hallway back to his room before grabbing the book he had talked to for an hour straight and then heading back through the hall into the kitchen where he put water on to boil. Sitting at his little bar area that served as his table until he could afford one, he opened the book back to the blank page and began writing.

"You still here?"


"did you hear what went on?"

No. I can't hear what goes on outside this book, but if you get good enough at Fuinjutsu you can have our thoughts transferred to each other instead of writing everything out.

"ok, learn Fuinjutsu, got it. Can I ask a couple more questions before I get ready for the academy?"

Of course…

"can you give me advice about combat on the battlefield?"

I guess…my best advice would be to not let your enemies live. While there are exceptions to this rule, killing your enemy will keep that enemy from harming your friends and allies along with innocent lives in the future.

"But isn't killing for the people who enjoy it?"

No Naruto. The second you start to enjoy killing someone is when you need to quit being a shinobi…

"But that would mean giving up my dream!"

If that is what it takes to save your soul then yes, your dream would be forfeit.

"But I promised the old man that I would take his position!"

Do you think your Kage got to that position of power without killing people in his career? Much less any other Kage?

Naruto's eyes widened. 'The old man killed people?'

Getting up and putting the noodles in almost robotically, the water began to boil once more and the blonde sat back down heavily on his barstool causing it to break. 'Great, gonna need to buy another stool.'

"Last question. Can I spend the money on anything? Or are there certain things I can spend it on?"

The money is yours to do with as you please, but my advice would be to buy shinobi gear first before spending money buying for your apartment.

"Thank you."

You are most welcome Naruto. Now go eat and buy your things.

Not wasting any more time naruto ate his ramen faster than most could eat an Oreo.

Finished with his eating, he placed his bowl in the sink before running down the hall and into the bathroom for a shower. Not hearing his door being knocked on he continued his shower uninterrupted.

Back at the door, it was still being knocked on before being opened by an elderly looking man and one of the Spec Op Elites in Konoha called ANBU. The two walked into the living room and looked around before the elderly man sat down on the worn down couch and looked at the broken stool and sighed. 'Looks like Naruto needs some new furniture.'

They both looked up to see Naruto walk out of the bathroom with a towel around his waist much to the old man's amusement and the female ANBU's embarrassment. Naruto looked to his side to see the two intruders before sighing and looking at the elderly man. "what do you want old man?"

The Hokage just chuckled before looking at naruto with amusement only a grandfather could get. "Is an old man not allowed to see his surrogate grandson?"

Naruto sweat dropped while looking at the old man and gave a simple "No."

The old man laughed at the expression on his young friends face. "Cat, your dismissed." The ANBU nodded before looking at naruto and giggling as he dryed his hair with a different towel. "Looking good, Naruto."

Naruto looked at her and chuckled. "I'll never be as good looking as you, Yuugao." He finished with a wink.

The ANBU giggled again before disappearing in a swirl of leaves. The old man looing on in disbelief as an academy student flirted with one of his best ANBU. "Am I missing something here?"

This time it was Naruto's turn to laugh as he looked at the man with a tear going down his face. "Yuugao and I have been doing that to each other for a while. Ever since I accidentally walked in on her showering in the ANBU shower room for the women."

The old man raised an eyebrow. "What are you doing in the female shower room?"

"I was setting up my next prank. I didn't know she was in there or I would have waited, but she came out of the showers with nothing on and I just stared at her with one of the masks in my hand with sneezing powder in the other. We stared at each other before she shrugged and walked toward me and opened the locker next to mine and got her clothes out." He said with a far off look.

A look of confusion went across the man's face. "What's with that look Naruto?"

A little bit of blood came out of Naruto's nose as he vocally imaged the scene out loud. "She walked out with water still dripping steadily down her luscious body. Watching as a drop of water made its way down the side of her face to her jaw and then down between her breasts. Making its way further down to her navel and further still until reaching her cleanly shaved pelvis and down to her clit…yes old man…I have a far off look on my face because that woman's beauty captured my attention.

He looked over at his elderly counterpart only to see him passed out on the floor with blood flooding out of his nose. Shrugging, Naruto got dressed and grabbed his book before heading out the door to the bank.

Upon reaching the door and opening it, he discovered the same ANBU he was just talking about was standing right in front of him. "Hello Cat."

She giggled again before walking toward him with a sway in her hips. It was a short distance, but long enough to capture Naruto's complete attention. Stopping in front of him, the ANBU used a finger to lift Naruto's chin while using the other to move her mask to the side and taking him in a hot passionate make out session.

Naruto, not being one to lose control, put his hands on the back of her thighs before picking her up and spinning around to put her against the wall. Yuugao moaned as she started grinding against Naruto with him grinding equally hard. Stopping for air, she looked at him in the eyes before giving a short but equally passionate kiss. "Come find me if you ever want to…work out your stress, Naruto."

Dropping to the floor to her knees for a second, she kissed the zipper on his pants before giving it a small rub with a wanting look up into his eyes. "I look forward to your visit." She then got up and walked with extra sway as she once again disappeared in a swirl of leaves. Leaning against the wall trying to calm himself and to get rid of the large tent in his pants. He took deep breathes and finally calmed down enough for the tent to be half the size I was not even a minute ago.

He opened his book and looked at the last message that was left by the book that left him with pride and a bit uncomfortable.

You better fuck that woman or I swear to god I will scramble your mind so bad that you will want to play with your barbies with the other girls your age…

Turning back to the Stats he still saw that he had 20 SP to spend and put 15 in intelligence and 5 in Fuinjutsu which brought him up enough experience to Level Up.

Congratulations-You LEVELED UP

Your new Level?...6!...You received 10 SP!...would you like to spend them?


Where would you like to put them?

Naruto put 5 into Fuinjutsu and 5 into the perk Double XP.

He then looked at the end results of the morning.

Basic Information

Name: Naruto Uzumaki_Namikaze (Last name Unavailable)

Age: 12

Cash: $300 ($151,500 in the bank)

Level: 6/100 (3,450/4,000)


Skill points Available: 0

Taijutsu: 5 (Styles are Available to learn)

Ninjutsu: 10 (Must learn about element affinities to learn elemental Ninjutsu)

Genjutsu: 0 (Learn about Genjutsu to Unlock)

Kenjutsu: 0 (Learn about Kenjutsu to Unlock)

Fuinjustu: 10 (You are now able to learn beginner level seals)

Kinjustu: 5 (This area is affected differently due to the amount of stress it puts on the Player. NOTE: Kinjustu Stat points can only be given every 5 Level Ups, however, 5 points have been granted to you, but will not take effect until the Achievement: (MY FIRST KINJUSTU!) Is unlocked.

Chakra Level: 60

Chakra Control: 10

Stealth: 50

Speed: 50

Endurance: 85

Intelligence: 20 (you are now able to think better and are able to comprehend what others say at an even greater rate)

Perks (when perks are unlocked they stay on you until they are deactivated

Double EXP: 5 (10 points needed to permanently unlock)

More perks available upon Level 10

Jutsu: Kawarimi, Henge, Orioke no Jutsu