See Through Me

He never liked to be confined in a hospital. That was why, when he was finally released, Usami Akihiko didn't spare a moment longer and hurriedly basked under the rays of the setting sun. His luggages would just be delivered to his flat so he went out almost empty handed save for his wallet. It was as if he has been caged and finally he was free.

"I knew it...its the hospital that made me feel like shit..." Usami thought, trudging his way towards the parking lot where his butler left his car. In reality, the loyal man should be the one driving the author back to his flat, but Usami insisted he go home alone.

Hands deep inside his khaki pants, Usami's huge steps were strong and haste. His lavender eyes straight ahead. From where he was, he could already see the rows of white, brick benches facing a waterless fountain. The cherubs stood mystically around the dry man made attraction.

Usami's eyes were completely focused on the naked cherub statues when he unconsciously lowered his gaze. It wasn't a chubby cherub he saw but a boy sitting on the ground. Wearing a white hospital gown, Usami already knew the boy was a hospital patient.

"Too bad kid, I'm going first..." Usami thought as he continued his walk.

As he closed the gap towards the deserted and quiet fountain showered with the orange tints of the huge sun, Usami for some reason couldn't take his eyes off at the boy staring far away, smiling.

"Is he...smiling at me?"

The author threw a glance behind him. He only saw two nurses's backs walking away. And three little kids playing catch ball on the vast soft grasses connected to the fountain. Sure that it wasn't him the boy with chocolate brown hair was smiling at, Usami continued looking at the brunette, his face not changing expressions.

"Uwah! Nii-chan! Watch out!" one of the litte boys shouted, making Usami glance back once more. He thought it was him the kids were warning but he wasn't. It was the young teen resting at the old, marbles of the fountain.

Usami's eyes were as if glued towards the blue ball. From the sky, it landed on the brunette's head, earning a yelp from the teen.

"What the hell, he didn't dodge away it was already staring at his face..." Usami thought, thinking how lame the teen was.

The boys, as if afraid to come near at their poor victim, they all cuddled together.

"Nii-chan! We're sorry! But you didn't dodge it when you could!" the boys shouted defensively.

Usami narrowed his eyes and noticed the brunette removing something from his ears. Earphones.

"I am not mad! It's alright!" the brunette yelled back.

"Nii-chan...why don't you play with us?" the boy who threw it towards the teen offered, relaxing. It was that little boy who took the inititative to finally come closer to the brunette. "The ball, Nii-chan, try throwing it to us!"

Deciding that the scene was already done and nothing interesting would come out of it, Usami then started on his tracks, only to find himself stopping once more.

The teen by the fountain extended his hands as if about to fly...and then crawled and felt on the ground, eyes ahead.

The little boys' expressions also changed at the same time realization hit Usami hard.

The brunette couldn't see.

"He's...he's blind," Usami Akihiko whispered under his breath. As if his brain wouldn't be able to accept something as sad as that he needed some affirmation.

For a long while, Usami just watched the brunette feel for the ball. The man was suprised by how much it affected him to see a blind person. He wasn't really the caring type and there were a lot of things he feared. But was there something more scary than be in the darkness all your life?

Usami's brown leather shoes contrasted the deep green of the lemon grasses, the sound of his steps drowned by it. The ball was in front of the brunette all those time and yet, he wasn't successful at getting it. So Usami, the man who only cared for himself bended and picked up the ball.

"I got it," Usami announced. The brunette sitting straight hearing that he didn't have to look for it anymore.

He wasn't angry. He was just a little annoyed that instead of throwing it back to the boys, Usami threw it a little harder far away. The kids threw a frightened look at the new intruder and ran after the ball.

Glaring unintentionally at the escaping boys, Usami then looked down at the brunette on the ground.

"Thank you, Sir?" the boy uttered, looking at the right direction when the man he was addressing to was standing on his left.

The voice was a little high pitched, still sounding boyish instead of the deep voice teenage boys eventually change into. The chocolate hair dancing on his forehead at the slightest breeze contrasted the emerald eyes that were staring into nothingness.

"It would be easier to say you cannot see it than keep on searching in vain, don't you think?" Usami threw as his eyes ran from the brunette's face to the empty sketch book beside him and the earphones together with the mp3 player.

"I wanted to throw the ball back," the boy replied with a disturbed frown. "I don't like announcing to the world that I can't see..." he then took his mp3 player and held on to it tightly. " makes the reality more real."

Usami knew he should be heading back. He should be there on that cemented pathway towards the parking lot where his red sports car was waiting. He should be by the main road shortly, driving his head out towards the early evening. Then once reaching home, he'd drink a glass of his favorite vintage wine to celebrate his release from the white-walled prison.
He knew that. And yet he found himself kneeling before the boy, and when the brunette didn't say anything, he eventually settled on the soft carpet of grass. Eyeing the boy with the eyes of a writer, Usami stared, absorbing every detail he didn't know what to do with.

And before the author had realized it, he was questioning the boy under the setting sun as if they had been friends for a long time.

"What kind of songs do you listen to?" Usami asked, remembering that the brunette was smiling just a while ago perhaps because of what he was hearing.

"Song?" the brunette asked, extending the other piece of his earphones to Usami, finally getting the correct direction. "They're not songs. They're audio books..."

Reaching for the extended object, Usami placed it inside his ears.

"How much green should it be for it to be called green?
Who said the sky is blue and not black?
Colors, they're just imaginations...they only have names because man agreed to it. Yellow could be red, purple could be pink. They all lay to the eyes that see. Even blind could have their colors at their command..."

Usami removed the earphone while pursing his lips. He reached for the boy's hand and placed the small piece in the boy's palm.

"What do you think? It's very poetic, isn't it?" the brunette uttered excitedly as if he was proud of it.

" the point that I don't understand it at all," Usami answered, commenting at his own writing. He knew that his books had its audio versions. But though he was sent samples, he never listened to them. Somehow, with the emotions applied to his own words, it felt like they were foreign and it sounded so strange to him. "I wrote that line for a story with a photographer for a main character a long time ago..."

"You've been listening to this all this time?" Usami queried, looking at the broken cherub at the side of the tree not far from where they were sitting.

"Yes. Usami Akihiko's stories turned to audio books are always a favorite."

"Hmmm..." Usami produced just to let the boy know he was still listening. After all, he couldn't think of anything to answer to that.

"His words are somehow abstract but still paint an image whenever I listen to them."

"You think too highly of it...I was merely playing with words..." Usami thought, reaching for the empty sketch pad beside the teen.

Usami flipped through the very first page of the sketch pad and found himself flipping page after page in awe. Goosebumps clearly running on his arms, Usami stared in disbelief at the teen sitting before him.

"You...drew these?"

"Err...yes..." the boy answered meekly. "But I am not really sure if it's good..."

With hands a little shaking, Usami once more looked at the pencil sketch that he liked the most. A hill with an old lighthouse, and though small, Usami could still see two people on top of it, as if embracing each other.

"You've got to be kidding me...this is exactly what I was thinking how the place would look while writing 'Light House Wishing'*1..." Usami then looked deep into the pair of eyes before him trying to double check whether the boy was really blind or just playing. "This is not good kid...this is excellent..."

For a man of few words and praises, he really did commend the boy genuinely.

"Ano...I don't know if it's true..." the brunette bowed slightly. "But thank you...I draw what I hear from the audio books...let my hand slide on the's the only time I ever feel so free..."

Usami's lips stretched into a smile. "It's're more talented than that Usami Akihiko."

Strangely, the change on the boy's cheeks looked cute to Usami. It was so charming that he had started having the urge to caress them. However, an inch from the boy's skin after reaching out, Usami stopped his hand.

How could a boy look straight into his eyes, without the boy actually seeing him? Disturbing. But Usami was also being drawn to it.

"Will you be here tomorrow?" Usami asked.

The boy slightly cocked his head, wondering why a stranger asked him that. But then, the boy nodded, slightly smiling. "I will be..."

"My name's 'Usagi'."

"Eh?" the boy's unseeing eyes widened. "R-rabbit?"

"Yes. What's your name?" Usami asked, his face serious.

"Misaki. Takahashi Misaki," the younger one replied as if in a trance.

"Can I call you 'Misaki'?"

"Eh?!" the boy was obviously caught off guard. To have someone he just met call him by his first name was a little strange. But what was more strange was that it sounded so good. "I...I guess it's fine..."

Usami handed the boy his sketch pad and motioned to stand up. "Talk to you tomorrow, Misaki."

"I don't understand you, Usami-sensei..." the voice of a concerned woman echoed into the underground parking lot. Her red hair complimenting her huge eyes filled with worry. She peered inside the author's car. "You were so eager to get released from the hospital...and now you're doing nothing but go back and fort... If that's the case sensei..."

Usami inserted his keys and made the car alive making it produce an angry sound. "I am just going to see someone...see yah."

The woman editor named Aikawa stared at the car fast disappearing. "If that's the case..."

Everyday without fail, Usami Akihiko would come at the back area of the hospital where a mini lush of green was created for relaxation. He'd come to see and talk with the blind kid about stuff Usami knew he would never bring up to another. And before he knew it, he had been coming for Misaki for the past two months.

Just by looking at the boy blindly sketching the images he get from his audio books, Usami felt content. The man had come to look forward to the peaceful afternoons where the two of them would sometimes just seat together in silence. Or the talk which didn't contain any coating. It was a pleasant feeling he couldn't place but kept wanting for more.

"Ne, Misaki...have you ever thought of what you wish for?"

The spring breeze blew gently, playing on Usami's and Misaki's hair. And though Misaki couldn't see, the brunette lifted his face towards Usami's voice.

"Wish..." the boy who was currently holding his sketchpad knitted his brows. As if he himself was confused. "To be honest, I never wished for anything. Not even being able to see...I was born this way so I never felt regrets or hard feelings...I guess that's very weird very...but..."

Usami's face was frozen in an expression of pity and a little anger. "To not wish for anything...doesn't that mean that one has already long lost any bit of hope...?" he turned away. "You're too young to be that way."

To Usami's surprise, Misaki abruptly moved closer. Putting the older man's heart almost to a halt. The boy sure had no ill intention to it nor did he realized it, but when two person's faces, not to mention two guys were that close so suddenly no more than an inch apart, it could send one conscious. But the brunette didn't know about it. And that was the cruel part.

"But," Misaki began, Usami could almost feel the boy's breath on his own mouth. "I think...I want to see your face."

Usami knew it was weird. Weird to feel an attraction to a kid, not to mention to a guy. He knew it was weird for him to stare so hungrily at the lips so presenting itself to him. He knew it was so weird for him to watch every move of the boy's unseeing eyes. Everything was weird. But he couldn't help it.

"'re such a playful thing..." Usami's lips curled into a defeated smile. "I love him..."

"I want to see you, Usagi-san."

Trying to act as normal as he could, Usami reached for the boy's head and patted it lightly. Happy already about such simplistic words. "You should wish for something better than that, baka..."

There was one thing that Usami enjoyed from his simple interactions from the brunette. The way the boy pouts at him angrily when he felt like Usami was making fun of him. Usami really liked it.

"But I am not joking. I never wished to see myself or any body else because I am used to being like this...but I thought, maybe it would be good to see you."

"Want to go somewhere?" without thinking, Usami asked. Probably because it was what he wished deep inside him too.

"Eh?" the huge eyes widened even more, it was almost comical. "But my doctor wouldn't allow me to go to-"

"Forget about doctors, I am just asking you if you have somewhere you want to go."

The boy bit his bottom lip. His brows started furrowing as if having an inner debate. But with a sudden glow on his face, Usami knew the boy already had one in mind.

"The sea! I want to go to the sea!"

Usami flicked Misaki's forehead with his finger, earning a yelp from the victim. "So cliched!"

Massaging his forehead, Misaki was extremely flushed. "Sorry for being cliched! But I miss the salty scent ot the air...and the sound of waters...besides," Misaki shoved his sketchpad lightly on the older man's stomach. "You asked me! I just answered you. Do you really have to make fun out of it?"

Misaki looked up when he heard the rustle of clothes from beside him. It seemed like his companion had stood up, preparing to leave.

"Then, let's go tomorrow?" Usami asked as if it was the most normal thing.


He felt a little beat after making his rounds. With his recorded files of his patients in one hand, he turned the knob open with the other. Ijuuin Kyo was so sure he had the most sour expression when he saw who was sitting on his swivel chair behind his table, inside his office.

"Just my luck..." Ijuuin hissed as he removed his white coat throwing it on the free chair before his table. "What are you doing here?"

Usami Akihiko threw a lopsided grin at Ijuuin at the same time he threw a folder on the doctor's cluttered table. "Delivery and a request."

Ijuuin's dark eyes narrowed at Usami. The two had been acquantances when they were still both in law school.
"Request...coming from you?"

"Yes, a request...ah but man, seriously why are you Misaki's doctor?" Usami whined, lighting a cigarette.

The darkhaired man threw himself on the empty sofa at the side of his office, ignoring the first name basis. " smoking in the hospital premises. Seriously, it's me who has to wonder why a man from law school who didn't have an ounce of artistic level way back then is now a writer. Are you sure you're not doing forgery?"

Usami smiled without humor. "I could say the same thing. Why did a law student like you became a doctor. Are you sure you're not a quack?"

Ijuuin smiled himself and after a few seconds, lit a stick of his own cigarette. "This request," he exhaled first a puff of smoke before continuing. "A trip to the sea?"

Usami's eyes widened for a fraction of a second and looked instead at the folder he just threw on Ijuuin's table.

"One of my cute Misaki has been going on about how he wants to go to the sea. He didn't ask me anything...but I could sense he's dropping hints," Ijuuin then frowned at Usami. "Usami, I will allow this trip but for only this time. You better return him here in one piece or I will be the one disecting you."

Standing from the swivel chair, Usami threw a faint smile before heading towards the door. "There won't be a 'next time' anyway, Ijuuin. The past two months has been a gift already. I am just returning the favor."

"You're such an idiot acting all so smart Usami. I hate that part of you."

"You're just jealous."

Ijuuin didn't look at the man leaving his office anymore and instead went towards his table. He slipped his cigarette in between his fingers and with the other hand flipped threw the pages with Usami Akihiko's seal. His face betraying the annoyance he had at Usami earlier and was replaced by sympathy.

"So this is your choice...Usami?"

" I don't believe this!" Misaki breathed out.

Usami was standing a good distance from the brunette but he could see the joy on the boy's face. The older man was sure, Misaki would even love it if he could only see the sun and the sky that looked pictureque together. The salty wind lashing at them, the sound of the waves filling their ears, and the warmth the morning sun showered them was more than too good to describe.

With every step, Usami's feet sunk lightly in the fine sand. The entire world looked so beautiful that instant but he couldn't even manage to remove his gaze from Misaki. He was all drawn to the boy the world didn't matter.

"Are you happy?"

Inhaling, the brunette looked up and closed his eyes. "I can see it in my's pretty...thank you Usagi-san!"

"Then I am glad."

When Misaki opened his eyes, Usami was thinking that the reflection of the sea was even better in Misaki's eyes than the real one. He must be one twisted man to be thinking it but he couldn't help it.

"Usagi-san...can I..." Misaki hesitated for a moment but then stepped closer reaching in front of him.

"What are you doing?" Usami asked, taking cautious hold of the searching hands before him.

"Can I see you?"

Usami looked at Misaki's unseeing emerald eyes, perplexed.


"I want to draw you, Usagi-san...let me?"

The moment Usami realized what Misaki was trying to do, he smiled. His chest was so warm that even a man at his age could cry. But he held himself together and instead guided Misaki's hands on his face. Misaki would be able to 'see' him by feeling him.

Closing his eyes at the slightest touch of Misaki's fingers, Usami sighed. "Fine by me."

Misaki's soft fingers travelled from Usami's cheeks to the man's forehead. The boy's thumb running shortly on Usami's lips. It felt ticklish when an index finger from the boy traced the bridge of his nose. And Usami swore he could feel himself about to lose it when the boy peered into his eyes as if they could see.

"Usagi-san, you're...shaking."

"I am? Haha, that's weird..."

"You're pretty Usagi-san."

"Baka. Don't go out saying men are pretty."

"But you are! You're good-looking outside but good as well inside," Misaki replied looking so serious. "I've learned from my stay in the hospital that kindness is the one thing the deaf can hear and the blind can see. And you're so full of it."

The man narrowed his eyes. "I am not as good as you put me to be. I have ulterior motives with everything."

"Still!" Misaki blurted. "Usagi-san, could you describe to me your colors?"

Usami sighed. He never could win with Misaki. At least, he wanted Misaki to be always on the winning side.

He gathered the boy's hands and led them back on his cheeks, enjoying the warmth Misaki's hands had.

"I have a pale skin." "From all the staying in the hospital."

"My eyes...they have the hue of lavender..." "Eyes that enjoy watching you."

Misaki delved his fingers into the man's locks. "And you have soft, silver hair that almost goes white with the sun rays..."


"Just guessing!" said the boy chuckling. "I can see you clearly! You wait for my drawing! It's a gift from me! Okay?"

To Misaki's surprise, he could sense the shift on Usami's position. They were sitting together on that warm sand but he could feel himself falling. He felt himself falling gently and slowly like he was being rocked by the calm sea waters.

"Misaki. I'm about to kiss you."


"Say no if you don't want to."

Misaki closing his eyes was the only enough reason Usami needed. Gently their lips met. Warm and perfectly fitting each others. And it stayed that way. An innocent first kiss for the boy, a fearful and marvelling one for Usami.

"Misaki..." Usami whispered as he rested his lips on the boy's eyes, moving to the boy's ear. "I want you to see through me...forever."

The boy didn't care about the sand sticking on his body. He circled his thin arms around Usami's neck making him lose his balance and off they rolled on the powdery sand.

Misaki thought it would be the best to have Usagi-san be by his side, telling him all the things the man could see. So the brunette nodded fervently, accepting the offer with all his heart.

The boy never knew the offer was literal.

"Are you nervous?" Ijuuin asked, stroking his favorite patient's hair.

The room was painfully bright. All focused on the boy's eyes as the medical tools and apparatuses were laid beside him. A faint song in the back ground, Ijuuin signed for a nurse to give Misaki the a shot to make the boy sleep.

"He's never visited me this entire week, sensei...he promised me he'll see me to the operating room," Misaki mumbled with a shaking voice. "He said he's going to be with me..."

"Misaki...he couldn't make it today because he has an important business to attend."

The nurses and the other doctors inside the operating room glanced at each other as Ijuuin, the ine in charge took his phone out.

"Eh...speaking of the devil..." Ijuuin frowned at his phone.

" phones inside the OR!"

Ijuuin bowed his head slightly. "Aww guys you're all so rigid. Let this one go, okay?"

"Here, you're Usagi-san is calling to cheer you on."

Misaki's eyes, unfazed by the hot lights above him went teary. His lips quivering.

"Hello? Hello Misaki?"

The boy was so afraid about this whole operation process he was feeling he won't be able to go out of it alive. But Ijuuin talked him out of it and assured that it will be a 100% success rate. And Usami promised he'd be outside waiting. So Usami's absence was making Misaki feel so frightened.

"Usagi-san you never picked up the drawing I made for you..."

"I am sorry I couldn't be there...even if I wanted to, I have to stay here. Be strong there okay and let's watch a million sunrises and sunsets together. I know the operation will be very successful. Ijuuin is a quack. But a very good quack."

Ijuuin looked away. "That bastard."

"Usagi-san, when will you come here?"

"...I love you Misaki."

The silence after the phone call was deafening. Ijuuin put the phone away and put on his operating gloves.

"See...he didn't care if every body would hear that last part. So you stay with me in this whole process. It's not just me who's going to make this successul Misaki. It's your will power. Okay?"

They shot Misaki something that made the boy feel like he was floating and drifting away.

"Relax...and try counting backwards from 10 to 1..."

The boy exhaled, his mind full of his Usagi-san. "Ten...nine..."




And the eye transplant began.

Still with the bandages around his head, on his eyes, Misaki felt for the walls and walked towards Ijuuin Kyo's office. Wearing his hospital gown, Misaki ran his hand on the smooth surface and with one hand, holding his sketch pad.
It has been a week and a half after the operation but his doctors said they couldn't yet remove the bandages so he still remained in the dark. In truth it wasn't even that that was bothering the brunette. It was something else so he was on his way to Ijuuin's office.

"Ijuuin-sensei?" Misaki called as he gently pushed the door open.

The silence inside it was enough of a proof that there was no one. The boy went in anyway as he always did and headed for the table he knew was just a few feet away. He sighed and placed his sketch pad on the table when his hand caught on something.
Curiosity ruling over, the boy picked it up off the table and felt for it.

"Did Ijuuin-sensei change phone models?" the boy's fingers ran against the cold device. "Rich people...tsk tsk..."
Not familiar with it, he pressed something accidentally on the phone.

"Hello? Hello Misaki?"

Misaki opened his mouth to answer, but his words got stuck in his throat.

"I am sorry I couldn't be there...even if I wanted to, I have to stay here. Be strong there okay and let's watch a million sunrises and sunsets together. I know the operation will be very successful. Ijuuin is a quack. But a very good quack."

With shaking hands, Misaki gripped the phone tighter. "What...what's this..."

"...I love you Misaki."

Sliding down the floor, Misaki's grip on the phone loosened and it fell. He had no energy so suddenly. He was all so confused. And the repeating voice in that phone was making him feel so tremendously afraid. A part of him might have known from the very start...but he didn't want to admit it.

"Ah...I hate being a doctor..." Ijuuin grumbled, swinging the door to his office open. What he saw wasn't really what he was wanting but was expecting. It happened sooner though.

"...together. I know the operation will be very successful. Ijuuin is a quack. But a very good quack."

"Misaki," Ijuuin started, going to where the teen had slumped. He picked up the phone and stopped the recording from playing over and over.

"Why?" Misaki croaked. "WHY?!"

The man in white pulled the boy up and let Misaki sit properly on the chair. He knelt before the boy, holding Misaki's hands.

"He was dying Misaki. No one could save him."

The boy froze. As if he seized to breath. Nothing made sense.

"That recording, he did that before he..."

Ijuuin felt hurt too. Despite the bandages on the boy's face, it wasn't enough to absorb all the tears flowing from the boy's eyes they were streaming down the pale face.

"He was very healthy! What...what dying are you saying..."

"When did you first met?" Ijuuin gently asked.

Misaki gritted his teeth. His shoulders shaking in anguish. He felt so betrayed.

"T-two months...ago..." the boy whispered barely audible.

"Misaki...two months ago Usami Akihiko was released from the hospital. Because there was no way of curing him. It was him who insisted on being released instead of being trapped here," Ijuuin gripped the boy's hand tigher. "That week was the predicted week of him dying. But miraculously...lived two months longer. I believe and he believed, that it was all because of you."

"When? When did he..."

"Two days after your seaside trip...his other lung collapsed. He had a rare case. He's got a traitor inside his body...Misaki this is inevitable."

"He promised me we'd watch many places...he promised me...why did he have to lie!?"

Ijuuin stood, sanitized his hands and gently tugged on Misaki's bandages. "Usami might have been a jerk even for a friend...but he never lies..."

Slowly, rolls of bandages left Misaki, falling on the floor. Ijuuin's gentle fingers were soothing. But because it was soothing, the pain stabbing inside Misaki's chest was more profound. Like there was something around his heart trapping it with tight groping.

"Open your eyes...slowly..."

Ijuuin grabbed a square mirror on his cluttered table and raised it a good distance from Misaki's swollen and flushed face.

"You could still watch many scenes together."

The long days of darkness slowly changed into brightness. Everything was foggy from the operation and his own tears. Misaki blinked a couple of times and the blurry face staring back at him became clearer...taking a sharp form.

Misaki slowly reached out to the small mirror before him. He pulled it close to his face. His throat hurt so badly he could scream. But he was left staring at the pair of eyes looking back at him with such vibrance.

"My eyes...they have the hue of lavender..." Misaki remembered as he stared at his new lavender eyes.

"I may have hated Usami's guts...but if someone would ask me who's my best's him," Ijuuin mumbled turning his back. "I know it's painful but I am sure it was more painful for him to keep it from you."

The brunette started choking on where he was sitting. He was staring at the most beautiful pair of eyes before him. He could only cry.

"Put this into your mind Misaki. Usami will surely want you to continue looking out with his eyes. Don't let this grip you down...cry everything tonight...and tomorrow...pick yourself up."

Ijuuin went out, closing the door. He rested his back against it. His own lips quivering at the painful shout he heard from inside his office.

"Damn you Usami. You surely enjoy dramatic exits..."

The Haka was polished. The morning due dripping from the flowers of his previous visit, it sent sparks of little rainbows on the marble monument.

Misaki slowly settled before the Usami Family grave and smiled. He'd been visiting the grave thrice every week for the past three years.

"I have an exibit tomorrow. I wish you were there...Usagi-san."


chapter end notes:

i hope you enjoyed this. arigatou
*light house wishing*, if you don't know is another one shot i wrote. so if you haven't read it yet, please give it a try!^^