I'm back! I got inspired to write this while reading a story that had memory loss as a focus. I'm sure this has been done before, but I'm doing my take on it, so hopefully I can provide a unique spin on it. This is my first Faberry fic, and I'm as nervous as I am excited. Reviews are greatly appreciated and I thank you all for taking the time to read this. I promise it won't be as confusing as my last story, and I apologize to those who have read "Dream" and the first chapter is messed up. I will eventually fix it, but I can't find my original so it's hard to fix. Also, any discrepancies with the show are probably not intended. My timeline might be off, like where Sam is concerned, but for this purpose Quinn and Rachel are seniors, Sam is back, Mr. Schue and Ms. Pillsbury are not together, and Shelby is not at the school anymore. Anyway, enough about that. I bring you the first chapter. No promises on an update schedule, or length.
Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or anything associated with it. No profit is being made and no copyright infringement is intended.
She's all for second chances.
Not necessarily a redo, but a chance to make herself better. Her pregnancy, for starters. She'd never take back having Beth, but she was given a second chance after giving her up, and she's making the most of it. Well...sort of.
Her priorities have changed. It's a bit unrealistic, in a sense, to say she's grown up so much after having a child, but she can't lie and say that it hasn't changed how she thinks and feels about, well, everything.
At seventeen, she can look back and see who she was, and see how thankful she is to have had the moment of clarity (even if it included sex with Puck) to see what path she was going down.
She's not perfect by any stretch of the imagination. She's still quickly annoyed, though can you blame her? -she does spend every day watching Finn attempt to learn simple dance moves. She still feels her stomach turn over whenever she passes by the classroom Shelby and the Trouble Tones used before, a mixture of fear and hatred and envy dancing together in one big bottle of emotion. Quinn doesn't think that feeling will ever pass.
She still walks down the hallway, wanting to be able to ignore the looks and the feeling of needing to impress everyone sending those glances. She still hides behind books and eye rolls and glares, wondering if there really is only one person (two including Santana, who just really couldn't care less) who dares to look through her facade.
"Just a bit sharp."
Quinn smiles to herself. She guesses that hasn't changed, either.
"I wish I had something sharp," comes the predictably swift and lame comeback from Santana.
"But other than that, it was quiet lovely, Quinn," Rachel assures her with a friendly smile.
That is something that has changed; Rachel offering compliments with her criticism.
Quinn smiling from it, even inwardly; that's new, too.
It's something that's as surprising as it is dangerous. It's the whole reason she's avoided a friendship with Rachel. Fear. This fear of the unknown.
All her other relationships, romantic and not, have been predictable. They've been comforting in their boringness- though her "friendship" with Santana is hardly ever boring with trying to predict what new insult the brunette will have next. Finn, Sam, Cheerios, they all were to lead her to something she wanted, necessary stepping stones to whatever goal she had in her sights.
But Rachel...Rachel and Quinn's path is unknown, because she's never allowed her mind to travel down that road, one that she never allowed to exist, and now that she's the New Quinn, it's something that seems more and more likely the longer the school year goes on.
Unfortunately, with Rachel, comes all of Rachel. And with all of Rachel comes her obsessions; dancing, Glee, music in general, and, worst of all her obsessions, Finn. Losing their competition because of a lame, totally inappropriate kiss should have sent Rachel into overdrive anger mode – well, whatever the Rachel Berry version of that would be – but instead, she was upset for a bit until the quarterback took her out on a date.
Quinn surmises it must have been one hell of a romantic date to make up for losing, but whatever it was, they are now back together and more sickening than ever. Rachel has very little patience while instructing others in Glee, but Finn's two left feet go by unnoticed. His one tone singing inspires eye rolls from the rest of the group but tears from Rachel...and Mr. Schue, Quinn snickers to herself.
But it really shouldn't matter. These should all be things piled on top of the list of why she shouldn't want to be friends with Rachel, but they aren't. These are just challenges for Quinn's competitive spirit to overcome. Reasons for her to prove everyone wrong and to answer Rachel's long standing question of "Why can't we be friends?"
But she knows why. She might not fully understand it, but she knows why a friendship is a horrible, horrible idea. She knows why her stomach sinks when it's time for Glee. Why every duet causes her to bitterly huff and bring out a book to read. Why she avoids Santana's stupid glances every time Rachel gets up and sings.
She also knows why it's so easy to give in to Rachel, after years of being so strong. Because even when she was horrible to Rachel, she was so drawn to her, so focused on her.
Quinn sometimes wishes she could go back to when she had herself convinced it was simple dislike.
Glee finishes with another (lame) pep talk from Mr. Schuester, who seems to be staring at Finn the whole time.
Quinn hides her smile when she hears Santana whisper to Brittany about his man crush on the giant. She said she's trying to be better, not that she's a saint. Plus, Santana has a point. She looks from Schue to Rachel, imagining what type of throw down there would be to compete for Finn's attention. Who is she kidding, there'd be no throw down, just a sing off. And probably a dance off. And maybe piano playing. Maybe Mr. Schue would rap.
Great, now she just snorted.
Rachel looks up at her, a light smile on her face, obviously a sign that she's curious about what has tickled Quinn. Not wanting to incite a lecture on why Finn is worthy of everyone's affection – and Quinn is sure Rachel has such a lecture prepared – she just shakes her head and looks away. It's annoying that she feels the disappointment from Rachel. It's more annoying when she see's Finn's arm come around Rachel in comfort and Rachel lean into it.
It's better when she sees Santana throw a jolly rancher at Finn.
"Santana!" he says loudly, rubbing his head.
"Finnept?" Santana calls back lazily.
"Why'd you throw that at me?" he demands angrily, glaring at her.
She leans back in her chair. "Automatically assuming it's the Hispanic. That's a bit racist."
Mercedes' ears perk up, and she looks at Finn sharply. "What's this about you being racist?"
"I'm not!" he says in exasperation, looking around wildly for support. "I love Michael Jackson songs." He stops and looks at Rachel. "Wait, is he black?"
Rachel's eyes widen, though Quinn isn't sure if it's in shock over Finn being so stupid as to think that explanation makes things better or him being stupid to open his mouth at all. Probably both.
"Finn," Rachel says softly, sighing lowly. "Yes, he was black. And we know you aren't racist. Santana is just messing with you."
"We know you treat everyone equal," Mr. Schue says in support, smiling widely.
"Just like you, Mr. Schue," Santana mumbles sarcastically.
Quinn finds herself enjoying today's Glee class suddenly. Even with the Sonny and Cher duet they all were forced to witness Rachel and Finn preform.
Mr. Schue dismisses them shortly after, with words about preparing songs, but Quinn blocks it out, knowing it's the same thing each day. Instead she busies herself with gathering her things, taking extra care to put her book into her bookbag as she keeps an eye trained on the front row of seats.
"I promise I'm not a racist," Finn says quietly to Rachel, looking around to see if Mercedes or Santana are nearby.
Rachel's shoulders lift slightly, but other than that she doesn't seem to be affected. "I know, Finn."
"I just don't want you to think I have a problem with your Dad...you know, because he's black." The boy leans in closer as he says this, and Quinn's eyes widen as she watches him, wondering how his brain could possibly be sending such stupid signals to his mouth.
"Or because he's gay," he continues in the same low tone.
Quinn doesn't even pretend to be interested in fiddling with her things, she's watching Rachel's reaction, praising the girl for being able to put up with that much stupidity in such large quantities, especially all at once.
"Okay, Finn," the captain says, offering the boy a smile, probably in lieu of kicking his teeth in like most normal people would be considering doing.
"Okay, good," Finn says, now back in his normal happy-go-lucky voice. His face splits in a wide grin and he picks up Rachel's bag and leans down and kisses her loudly.
Quinn finds her focus shifting suddenly, wishing she would have left as soon as Glee had ended. She becomes so focused on leaving that she almost misses Rachel stepping in front of her.
"- if you're interested."
The blonde looks up, giving Rachel a strange look at the confusing words. "What?"
Rachel looks down shyly, obviously not expecting to have to repeat herself. Apparently her courage was only good for one delivery. "I um..I said I could help you with your pitch sometime...i-if you are interested." Seeing the unchanging expression on Quinn's face, she quickly back peddles. "But not that you desperately need it. I mean you are a tad sharp, but it's not really noticeable, just to me since I have such advanced training, so..."
Both girls breathe when Rachel finally shuts up. "Um..." Quinn looks around, eyes landing on Finn watching them intently, and it's his strong gaze that makes her mind up. "Sure," she says finally, obviously shocking Rachel, who was probably expecting a much harsher answer.
Rachel takes a few seconds to process the cheerleaders agreement, but soon her bright smile appears. "Okay. Good. That's good," she says nervously. "I'll give you my number, and we can set a time to meet to work together."
They exchange numbers, and Quinn has never been so glad to be just a tad bit sharp.
"Come on, Rach," Finn interrupts. "My parents won't be home until six..." he drops off, completely unsubtly, and just like most things where Finn is involved, her happiness is short lived.
She watches Rachel, hoping the brunette will tell Finn that she can't, or that she doesn't want to be alone with him, or that she's moved on to at least partially evolved species. But she doesn't, and Quinn has come to expect this now.
She expects the drop in her stomach now, too.
She expects that nothing will change with her and Rachel.
But she doesn't expect to be so wrong.
She doesn't expect that she won't get to meet up with Rachel for practice.
She doesn't expect that things are about to completely change.