A/N: Guys, college is so busy ): But I've been writing in my notebook on the train/during boring classes, so I'll have lots of updates over the next week-ish. So, for now, here's the next chapter. Enjoy!
Hidan frowned and pulled the blanket up to his chest. He couldn't get his mind off of Deidara, no matter how hard he tried. He would have wondered why, but he already knew. The blond was unstable, even more so than usual, given the current situation.
"Why did Sasori hit him?" Hidan whispered. He was too exhausted to keep up his usual crude language.
For a moment, Kakuzu thought. Then, he shrugged. "Because he's a short tempered idiot."
Ignoring the remark, Kakuzu continued. "Sasori can deal with a tremendous amount of stress. But eventually, he hits a point where he just snaps, rather than dealing with it in a normal manner."
"So, he is a fucking idiot."
"He's not close to many people, so he usually isn't aware of his breaking point."
"Not a good excuse, if you ask me."
"It isn't. Deidara's a lot, and he didn't know how to handle it. The boy's depressing, and needs constant watch and attention."
"That doesn't mean he can beat the shit out of him because of it."
"I completely agree."
"What pushed him over the edge?" Hidan asked softly. Already, his mind was beginning to come up with possible scenarios. The good thing about Deidara was that he was extremely predictable.
"Sasori wouldn't tell me."
"Unfortunately, I think I know," the albino practically whispered.
Hidan sighed heavily before continuing. "He told Sasori that he's in love with him. Sasori's too embarrassed to tell you, probably. But you should hear how Deidara talks to him...it's obvious."
"...He's gay?" Kakuzu sputtered without thinking.
Hidan blinked once, then twice. "Fucking look at the kid, dumbass."
"The three of us are fags, you idiot." The albino said, rolling his eyes as if it were obvious. "Does that fucking bother you? Fucking let me know before you decide to deck me in the face. I don't want to end up like him."
"...Would you react like that?"
"Me? Fucking no. I'd probably kill you."
Kakuzu's jaw dropped, but he quickly regained his composure. He shouldn't have been surprised; Hidan would do something like that.
"I don't understand...Why Sasori of all people?" Kakuzu muttered. "He's my best friend, but I know he's an ass."
Hidan smirked. It was the same reason Itachi had fallen for Kisame and he for Kakuzu. "He's emotionally attached to him. Sasori was kind to him, so he associated happiness with him. Then, the bastard fell in love. When there's only one person who treats you well, and you're with them every day, you don't have many options. Especially with Deidara. He develops feelings way too quickly.
Kakuzu sat in silence for what seemed like an eternity before nodding slowly. "That...wow." Then, the thought for a moment. "Are all of you like that?"
"I don't do dumb shit."
"That doesn't answer my question."
"Doesn't fucking matter. It's none of your Jashin damned business."
"Unlike Deidara, I'm not a risk taker, or an idiot."
"Hardly. Who fucking does something like that?! You already know you're going to get rejected, so—"
"Hidan, why are you getting so worked up about this?" Kakuzu asked, watching the albino as he paced around the room, face a bright shade of red. Wait, why was he—
Kakuzu could have punched himself in the face. How dense could he be? Hidan knew exactly what was going on with the blond, because he was feeling the exact same thing.
Shit, he was pretty fucking stupid not to notice it earlier.
"How did you get Deidara's feelings so well?"
"I'm good at that shit."
"Personal experience, dumbass."
"Not fucking important."
"Are you in love with someone?"
"What are you—fucking—no!" Hidan stammered, face beginning to turn even more red.
Kakuzu gave the younger man a flat look, but said nothing. As long as he had known Hidan, he was aware that the kid was a shitty liar. "Ah. What personal experience are you speaking from, then?"
"Will you stop fucking around and talk to me?"
"Why the fuck not?"
"Because I don't need you to fucking punch me in the face when I tell you that I have a Jashin damned crush on you, damn it!"
As soon as the words left Hidan's mouth, he wanted to kill himself. Of all the things to do without thinking, he had just done the worst.
Kakuzu, on the other hand, was shocked that the albino had even gotten the words out. He already knew what the kid was thinking, but hearing it was a whole different story.
"Why would I—are you saying—"
"Forget it, you fucking son of a—"
"Oh. You're embarrassed."
"Of course I'm fucking embarrassed!"
Kakuzu sighed heavily. Embarrassed or not, he wasn't surprised to see Hidan getting so worked up over it. After all, the kid overreacted to just about everything. Why would this be an exception? Wordlessly, he leaned forward, until he was only inches away from Hidan. He hesitated for a moment, then moved forward again, pressing his lips firmly against the younger man's.
Rather than completely freaking out—which Kakuzu completely expected—Hidan stayed completely still, making only the smallest of attempts to kiss the older man back. Carefully, Kakuzu pulled away and blinked a few times before realizing what he had done.
"Shit, Hidan, I'm so sorry, I didn't—"
Before Kakuzu could even finish his sentence, the younger man launched out of his seat and threw both arms around his guardian. "You're a fucking idiot," Hidan muttered. Even though the words were leaving his mouth, he couldn't keep a wide smile from breaking out on his face. "I fucking love you."
Upon hearing the words, Kakuzu couldn't help but smile back. This kid was crazy, overdramatic, and loud, but he wouldn't change it for the world. "I love you, too, Hidan."
With less caution, Hidan pushed himself up and slammed his lips into Kakuzu, pulling the both of them backwards so that they collapsed onto the couch. As the two of them stayed there, mouths working against each other, the albino couldn't remember a time when he had been happier.
The trip back to Kisame's house was completely silent. Itachi stared out the window, while Kisame focused on the road. What he had seen was nothing short of awful. He had never experienced Deidara at such a low point, and it was actually horrific. What made matters worse was that he had absolutely no idea as to what he could do. Sasori was the root of the problem, so none of his efforts would be good enough unless the redhead was involved.
Had Itachi been in the boy's situation, he would have left. His guardian wasn't worth that much suffering. Wasn't worth killing himself over. But Deidara saw something in him, and he couldn't get the blond to change his mind, no matter what happened.
When they got inside, Itachi threw himself down on the couch, and Kisame went to the kitchen to put on some tea. When it was finished, the two of them sat next to each other, silence still as strong as ever.
As he reached towards the coffee table for his tea, Itachi looked down at his hands, and saw that they were shaking. At first, he thought he was cold, but pushed the thought aside when he felt a white hot anger seep into his body. Deidara's touch still lingered on his skin, and the boy's tears still burned him.
For the first time in a while, his thoughts were diverted from his insecurity, and were now focused on Deidara's suffering. He was furious...not at Deidara, but Sasori. He looked over at Kisame, who sat on the couch, completely unaware of what was going on in his head. Though he was livid, Itachi always kept his cool, calm facade.
This time, however, he completely forgot his fears, he forgot Kisame, and he forgot his disorder. All he knew was the sting of Deidara's grip against his flesh.
"He's an asshole," Itachi whispered, surprising himself when he felt the words pass through his lips. The vibration of his vocal chords tickled his throat, and it scared him for a moment until his anger pushed the fear away.
Kisame, on the other hand, looked like he was about to die from shock. He had never heard Itachi say anything with so much emotion.
"He's a fucking asshole," Itachi said, louder this time. Kisame, rather than being relieved that the Uchiha was finally speaking, knew that this was dangerous. He moved close to Itachi so that if he reacted, he'd be right their to either help him, or stop him.
"He's a fucking asshole!" Itachi screamed, slamming both hands down on the coffee table, almost to the point of making the wooden surface crack.
Kisame leaned forward and seized Itachi by the shoulders. "Who are you talking about, Itachi? What happened?" he asked, only to be shoved backwards by the younger man.
"How can you be so stupid!" Itachi hissed. "None of you see it!"
"Itachi, what the hell are you talking about?!"
"Sasori and Deidara, you moron," Itachi growled.
"...What?" Kisame managed to force out. "Itachi, what's going on?" he asked softly, noticing that the younger man was now shaking violently.
"Deidara works so hard to make that bastard like him. He always acts like everything's fine, and acts like an idiot to make sure no one gets as depressed as he is. Sasori has absolutely no respect for him, and he treats him like shit."
Kisame stared at the Uchiha, and rose a brow. He had heard everything that Itachi had said, and absorbed all of it, but something more important had caught his attention. "Are you...crying?"
Sure enough, Itachi was beginning to tear up, and his face turned beet red from embarrassment. Of course, he shook his head "no."
"Itachi, why are you letting this hit you so hard?" Kisame murmured, letting one of his hands rest on the boy's shoulder. It was upsetting yes, but it wasn't worth a complete meltdown.
Then, Kisame remembered that unlike Itachi, he was stable.
"Deidara doesn't deserve this," the Uchiha began. "He starves himself, he mutilates his body...he's slowly killing himself. And you know what? He never asked for help, and he never tried to get attention. He loathes himself, and he needs help more than any of us, but he'd rather die that inconvenience anyone, especially Sasori," Itachi blurted out, voice turning cold at the mention of the redhead's name.
"Itachi, it'll be okay."
Kisame couldn't deny that. The Uchiha, for as long as Kisame had known him, was sharp. Not only that, but he never had a problem seeing reality. Though sometimes, the blue skinned man couldn't help but think that it contributed to many of Itachi's issues.
"I'm sorry, Itachi."
"Why can't I do anything to help him?"
Kisame shrugged, and held the boy even tighter. "Sometimes, all you can do is watch."
Itachi shook his head. That wasn't good enough for him; there was no way in hell he'd sit back and watch the blond die. "Kisame..." he whispered, looking up at his guardian. Now, he let tears fall freely down his face, but his expression was as emotionless as ever.
"If Deidara kills himself because of this, so will I."
Kisame's eyes widened, and his jaw dropped before he could stop it. Considering how much Itachi hated talking, he knew the younger man wouldn't waste his words on over exaggerations. What disturbed him most was the look in Itachi's eyes; he was dead serious, and left absolutely no room for Kisame to doubt him.
It was then that he saw the extent of Itachi's damage. He had always been aware of the Uchiha's disorder, but it had never shown itself with such intensity.
Kisame paused for a moment, and stared at the Uchiha, who had now taken a seat next to him on the couch. His small frame was still shaking violently, full of pent up anger that had yet to be fully released. "Itachi?"
Said boy looked at him blankly.
"Are you in love with him?"
As soon as the words processed, Itachi's eyes widened. Where the hell had that come from? The thought had never crossed his mind, so how had Kisame suddenly come to that conclusion? He thought for a moment about it, though, just to humor his guardian. No, it was nothing like that. He shook his head. "No," he responded flatly.
Even though the Uchiha was always blunt, the quick, forceful response surprised Kisame. "Ah, alright."
Now, Kisame felt extremely uncomfortable. What had he just gotten himself into? "No, no, I just thought, since you're always looking out for him, and you're always thinking about him, that maybe you—"
"Without constant supervision, he will die. Sasori is not providing it, so someone else must take his place."
"Itachi, I don't think you can handle that much—"
"Someone has to. I don't care if it kills me, I'm not going to let him do this to himself," Itachi whispered.
Kisame sighed and sat Itachi back down on the couch, sitting down next to him right after. "Calm down."
"Fuck that," Itachi spat, more violently than he had intended. He knew very well that he was making his guardian uncomfortable, but he honestly didn't care.
"It's not fair."
"Well, yeah, but—"
"You're so nice to me. And what the hell do I do? I never talk, I never try to communicate with you, and you treat me so well. Hidan and Kakuzu get along fine, and what about Deidara? Do you know how hard he's trying to be nice to Sasori? He fucking adores him! Why is he the one to get treated like this?!" Itachi all but shouted, tears beginning to well up in his eyes. Why? He would have done anything to take Deidara's place. After all, he knew he could handle it. His family had been the same way, so it wouldn't have been anything new. He was used to disappointment. Deidara was still naïve.
"Itachi, stop," Kisame pleaded. "This isn't something you can change."
"I have to try."
At the sharpness in Kisame's voice, the Uchiha froze in place. The older man put a hand on his shoulder and pulled him back into a hug. "You're scaring me."
"What does it matter?" Itachi murmured, hiding his face in his guardian's shoulder.
"Itachi, look at me."
Reluctantly, said boy looked up at Kisame.
"Please, just...stop. I don't want to lose you."
"...What?" Itachi sputtered out, eyes widening considerably.
"I don't know what I'd do if you killed yourself. Just...be careful, okay?" Kisame murmured.
Just like before, Itachi's chest tightened considerably, and it because considerably harder to breathe. He was nervous. Anxious. No...what the hell was going on now? Unaware of what to do, he did the only thing he could think of: he curled up against Kisame's chest and proceeded to break into a fit of violent sobs.