Surrender? Yeah, Right!

Since she sold the Last Chance Garage in Chicago to her sister, Charley was having a blast running her new one in Wildcat City, Kansas, home to Leo the Patriotic Lion and other such heroes of his kind, all who were (and are to this day) too proud of the USA to ever leave or abandon it. She never thought she'd receive as much business as she was getting lately. As stressful as it was, it almost doubled her income. "Good thing I hired extra employees," she said to herself as she came down from the top room of the attic to the garage that she used as her house. "I never thought yesterday would end!"

"Had a long night, Charley, ma'am?" Modo asked.

"Pretty much, Modo," Charley replied as she yawned again. "Business is booming, but it almost gave me a headache."

"Looks like it. You sure have your hands full."

"You might say that. Where's Throttle and Vinnie?"

"Oh, they're on some case with SUPERCAT, WARCAT, and Leo the Patriotic Lion. I'm not with them because of that flat tire I suffered last night as Rump tried to eradicate us again. At some point, I'm going to join them. And I'm certain Stoker's in his superhero form again."

"I think I like him better that way."

"We all do, Charley, ma'am. We all do."

"Yeah. So, what's the case?"

"I don't know, but I'm about to find out." Modo ran to his bike after getting the okay from Charley that it was ready to go again, gunned his engine, and caught up with his friends after seeing Throttle whistle to him. "You coming, Modo?" he called.

"Yeah, sorry, bro," Modo apologized. "Charley helped fix the flat tire I had last night and she said to wait at least 12 hours. Now that 12 hours have passed, you can update me on what's happening."

"I'll tell you what's happening, bro," Vinnie spoke up. "Old stink fish is back!"

"What?!" Modo exclaimed in mild shock. "But I thought Lord Camembert banned him from ever returning."

"He did, bro," said Throttle, "but that still didn't stop him from trying again. One thing that will help, as Leo was telling me, is that we won't be hearing from Lord Camembert anymore."

"Why is that?"

"Leo's actions coupled with his all-powerful beliefs got Lord Camembert sent to some intergalactic prison, and his death penalty, which worked to perfection, involved the electric chair."

"And just when I thought that was out of style." Modo turned to cough.

"Well, it's either that or death by firing squad. Fortunately, you and I are not going through either of those, though we almost did."

"Well, that's because Carbine fell for Napoleon Brie's tricks."

"That's true."

The Biker Mice rode on towards their destination, eradicating goon after goon. The strange act this time was that all the goons had messages for our heroes: "Surrender!" That was it. Apparently, Limburger was either losing his touch or his sanity. But either way, Vinnie always replied back, "Surrender? Yeah, right!"

"Oh, I'll give up my bike, when you pry it from my cold, dead fingers!" Throttle would add.

"No one's taking Lil' Darlin'!" Modo would conclude.

Meanwhile, Limburger was showing no gratitude to his henchman. "Hurry, you hypocritical help meat!" he bellowed at Karbunkle. "With all these goons, those bothersome Biker Mice will never be able to find us. Now speed up the goon regenerator!"

"I'm doing the best I can, your cream cheesiness," Karbunkle argued, "but it's at full power!"

"Blast!" Limburger exclaimed. "And just when I thought it was only halfway decent. Just try and find good help these days! Oh!"

While the goons kept coming, the Biker Mice kept taking them out. Modo relied on his bionic arm, Throttle used his pistols, and Vinnie, well, improvised. Along the way, they were joined in their fight by the weaponry from Carbine and Mace, and the super suave moves of Rimfire, who was playing hard to hit. WARCAT, Wildcat City's top biker who wore only black and spoke with a gruff voice, joined the action with a combination of his trusty six-shooter and his biker's use of smokescreens.

High above in the sky, SUPERCAT and Stoker, as Super Stoker, watched the action from below.

"Well, seems like they're making progress," said SUPERCAT.

"Slowly," Stoker replied. "For every one they're taking out, six more are appearing to continue. Where are all these goons coming from? That's what's got me suspicious. Oh, and by the way, Limburger's back."

"But I thought his boss banned him for eternity."

"He did, but then Leo had him sentenced to the electric chair in some intergalactic prison trillions of light-years away. It would take weeks for you and me to find it if we looked. I think you and me better check out his hideout and see what is happening. He hasn't got the time to rebuild his tower, and besides, in its place is the new city hall."

"Sound like a plan to me. First, let me contact Leo and see if he knows anything. He's always on top of things. Faster than me, perhaps."

"You do that. Leo's the greatest."

Stoker flew on with SUPERCAT towards Limburger's hideout as the mighty Cat of Steel paged his comrade. In a flash, Leo's voice came on the other end. "Oh, SUPERCAT! Thank heaven you called me!" he began.

"What's going on, Leo? Have you been taken hostage again?"

"No, but I've been wondering why all the ruckus that is disrupting the peace. None of our city's premiere marching bands can practice."

"I know that's something that would upset you, no doubt about it. I'm actually investigating with Stoker right now."

"Good. Keep me posted. Just so you know, I am at city hall, where I just finished a proposition with the mayor. The one about fixing the traffic light systems after they went haywire. It was a success."

"Oh, good. Glad that went well. And I'll keep you posted. Over and out." SUPERCAT's communication link went blank. "Anything yet, Stoke?" he asked.

"I see it," Stoker announced. "My X-ray vision is telling me he's got a goon regenerator. That explains why six goons appear for every one taken out."

SUPERCAT activated his X-ray vision. "Now I see it," he said. "Let's trash it!"

"You bet." The two superheroes steadied themselves and flew down to the hideout.

Meanwhile, WARCAT tested the new autopilot feature on his bike due to one of the goons capturing him and the Biker Mice, tying all four to one pole with a big chain. While the autopilot feature worked, the bike couldn't escape the laser fire from one of the other goons.

"I've been there," Modo said to himself. "At least Lil' Darlin' is okay."

"Oh, no! Fireball!" WARCAT exclaimed. "If they've damaged him…" Does it sound déjà vu to you? It should. Rump was guilty of damaging Lil' Darlin' in a junkyard earlier in the careers of the Biker Mice, and Modo felt the glow of rage within his one eye. Here, a similar feat was happening, but WARCAT had no experimentation done on him. Still, because he could bench press 850, he began to flex his muscles within the confines of his anger.

"Big guy, pump it up!" Throttle called.

"Yeah! You the tiger!" Vinnie added, laughing his signature triumphant laugh when WARCAT broke free. The Mice were able to reclaim their bikes while WARCAT drew his six-shooter and continued to open fire on the goons. They continued their struggle with all their might.

"It's no use!" Karbunkle had said to his boss.

"Apparently not. I'm deducting it out of your pay for not making the goons fast enough," Limburger replied.

"Ha, he can't deduct it from my pay, because I don't get paid!" Grease Pit interjected.

"And at that price, that's overpriced!" Limburger snapped back at Grease Pit.

"Sorry, boss," said Grease Pit. "In the meantime, them rotten rodents are getting better at what they're doing."

"But they can't…WHAT?!" Limburger's interrupted remark was directed towards the explosions coming from above. "It's an attack! ACTIVATE DEFENSES!" SUPERCAT was throwing fireballs at the goon regenerator, and Stoker was adding to the effect with his powers. The resulting blaze of the fireballs left the goon regeneration in a billion jigsaw pieces.

Leo had finally gotten close enough to see, as he had found the hideout and was spying on the action. "Ah, I wondered about how the Cat of Steel could create those fireballs," he said to himself. "He creates them out of nothing! Incredible! And good thing I wore the golden armor today." He jumped out and karate-chopped his way through the rest of the brick wall that wasn't torn down by the explosion that destroyed the goon regenerator.

"AAAAH!" Limburger screamed as he tried to get away, but Leo got there first. "You again!"

"The one and only," Leo replied as he pinned Limburger to another wall. "What have you got to say for yourself, terrorist?"

"Permit me to offer you some advice that may be vital to your health," Limburger shot back. "NEVER MESS WITH LAWRENCE LIMBURGER!"


"Does it look like I got it? Now let go of me!"

"After I take you to jail!"

"GET OFF!" Limburger shoved Leo out of the way, but Leo was back there in a flash. The two wrestled one another while SUPERCAT and Stoker grabbed Karbunkle and Grease Pit and dropped them in Alcatraz, then shot back faster than a speeding cannonball just in time to see the wrestling match end with Leo victorious. (Leo had grabbed Limburger and threw him towards the last of the goon squadrons, leading the Biker Mice and WARCAT to peel him off and turn him over to the police.)

Back at the Last Chance Garage, the group celebrated their victory while Charley took a look at WARCAT's bike and made the necessary adjustments. "Just relax, okay, WARCAT?" she said reassuringly. "He'll be just fine."

"Thank you, Charlene," WARCAT replied humbly. "That's a big relief."

"Hey, glad to see your bike is back up and running, big fella," Throttle spoke up, high-fiving WARCAT.

"When did you get in the act?" Charley asked Leo.

"Let's just say I was on top of it the whole time," Leo replied. "But of course, I couldn't have done it with the super soldiers of Mars!"

"Anytime, Leo," Throttle replied. "You ever need our help, you just give us a call."


Biker Mice From Mars © Rick Ungar, Tom Tataranowicz, Tom Tataranowicz Animation, Brentwood Television Funnies, and whoever else owns the rights

Leo the Patriotic Lion, WARCAT, and SUPERCAT © me