Guess who's back, back again. i am back, tell a friend.
hey, guys what's going on. yes, i am back with a new story. i will be doing better with updating because i am on summer break with nothing but time because i have nothing to do. (sad tears) so i have been writing every day so i got some this story started. i wanted to get up before the summer ends and before the whole twilight thing dies down. so that's what we're shooting for.
before i get to the story, you know i got tell you guys some things. one, i had a hard ace time with this title so if you dont like it, i dont know what to tell you. 2, i'm trying my hands at different povs so it will be going back and forward between bella and edward. 3 and probably the last thing before we start, bella is suppose to be like really smart in this story. because of this, there might be some words not normally used in every day convo. i'm pretty you can just click on the word and press "search" to find out what something means, but if you dont, i will post a mini dictionary probably at the beginning of the next chp or something.
...oh, one more thing: if there is anything that might remind you of AP or AM, this is not a conclusion of those stories, i didnt do it on purpose. just a heads up...
enough of me. sorry. enjoy the first chp. as always, not beta so please go easy on the grammar comments.
High school. It's supposed to be the best four years of your life – well until college, anyways – but that is far from the true when it comes to Isabella Swan, which is me, by the way.
It started in freshman year. Coming from an elementary school where I wore nothing but strict uniform that I followed like my life depended on it, it is an understatement that fashion wasn't exactly my strongest suit when I came to high school. However, considering most of my classmates were with me at said school, one might assume that was a poor excuse.
It's not that I really care about my fashion sense, or lack there is as the popular girls like point out ever so often. I personally think that people – teenagers, especially – put an extreme amount of thought into what they wear every morning. I mean the girls here act as if they're attempting to astonish a movie producer or something. I personally think they're just something to keep people from being bare and unprotected while moving from point A to B. This is why I stick to my loose fitting jeans and t-shirts I had forever. They're comfortable, inexpensive, nor are they very hard to find in stores. Most importantly, I don't feel as if I'm going to suffocate from lack of oxygen like I'm sure some of these girls do.
Then there's my sophomore year. That year was a little better than the first, I suppose. Somehow, the most popular girl in school, Rosalie Hale, chose me to partner for a project we had to do in our English class. She wasn't focus to do so; she actually picked me by choice. It didn't surprise me when the teacher told us to pick someone to work with and she walked over to me. I thought she was going to make fun of me for always working alone, but she didn't. However, it did surprise me when she smiled and asked if she could work with me.
Then as we worked, she never pushed all the work on me like nor did she blow me off or make fun of me in front of her other friends as I thought she would. We shared the work equally and end up getting an A on the project. She actually stood up for me when people picked on me and told everyone I was her friend. It didn't stop people from making fun of me, but it did decrease it.
Someone who would label her as the typical dumb blonde cheerleader, but she was way smarter that people think. She is one of the smartest and nicest people I have ever met. That could be why she's one of my best and only friends at Forks High School.
If anyone thought I was lying about that, they should take a look at our lockers. I opened my locker and smiled at what I saw. The proof is in the pictures we take together that is taped all over the inside of the metal doors as well as the walls of our bedrooms.
However, I could see why people would still be skepticism our relationship. Rosalie Hale, the definition of a golden girl. She has golden blonde hair with shiny deep blue eyes that would make the deepest and prettiest ocean look dull. She was the typical cheerleader, which is funny because she wasn't typically a cheerleader. But then there's me. The girl with the glasses, oversize clothes that look like they should belong to a boy, and has her hair in a messy ponytail every day. Not only that, but I'm the one who cares more about studying and passing all my classes than I do about hair and parties. I was the typical nerd. We weren't supposed to get along as well as we do.
This is why I decided what I did. Two weeks ago, on of first day as high school seniors, I made a promise to myself that this year would be different. I would no longer be known as Rosalie's dorky friend that "she probably hanging out with me because she feels sorry for me" other girls words, not mine. I would reinvent myself and live the life a high school student should. However, I don't think I was off to a good start considering I was still staying at home on the weekends, skipping lunch to study in the library and still look the way I do.
I sighed at the thought. Honestly, I think the promise was easier to make then to follow through on. The problem was, I don't know where to begin. I grabbed my books and I closed my locker door. After I did, I turned to walk to the library for another lunch along, but then I became motionless. I saw the football team walking towards me. The sight froze me.
Of course he was in front, leading the pack with his girlfriend on his left. Tanya, the head cheerleader, and the occasionally – by that I mean more than I would like – throne in my side. He walked through the hall like he own the school as he tosses his football in the air then catching it to toss it again. he was the quarterback and the captain of our football team.
His bronze hair was perfectly messy, like controlled chaos. I'm pretty sure that's exactly what he was going for. I wondered how long it took him to perfect that "Look at me. I just roll out of the bed looking this hot" look every morning. I'm sure he would be more than happy to learn he got what he was aiming for. His Leatherman jacket hung loosely on his body. I hear all the time from all the students that he has the built of Eli Manning with the slingshot arm to match. I honestly didn't know what either of those meant since I never watched a game in my life. It was no wondered why he was most wanted boy in school. He was Edward Cullen.
Regardless, the All-American-Pretty-Boy wasn't the reason my whole being forgot how to move.
As the group of guys passed me, one was walking too close and bumped into me. When he did, I lost control of my hands and everything I was holding spilled out of them. "No." I groaned as I looked down as my paper spread across the hall floor. I knew no one would help me because no one ever does when something like this happens. I even heard a few giggles. Blood rose to my face and heated it. I should grab my papers before people step all over my papers and my embarrassment worsens.
I bended down to gather. "Are these yours?" I heard a voice as I was picking up my books. I saw papers being handed out for me. I looked up to see who helping me. I thought it was teacher and I was ready to get him a polite smile. The thought to do anything flew out of my head when I saw who it was.
Jasper Hale. He was the second half of the "twins of golden perfection", as people called them. He was my best friend's twin brother and the receiver for the team. He was also the reason I was frozen the first time. I've known most of my classmates, him and Rosalie included, since about sixth grade. I have been secretly in love with him ever since.
He was smiling at me and helping with my papers. The image of him so close once again had me frozen in my place. "These papers; are they're yours?" he repeated when I didn't say anything back. I couldn't believe that he, of all people, was actually helping me. So I couldn't say anything back. His smile slipped in a worried one. "Are you okay?" he questioned.
Wonderful, he thinks something mental wrong with me. Make a movement, say a word, do something so he doesn't think you are incapable of doing so.
I nodded quickly. I was nodding so fast, my glasses slipped down. I gulped as I pushed them back up. This was not going well. "Yes, yes. Those are mine." I finally choked out. I handed out my hand for them.
He gave a light chuckle as he stood up. I quickly followed him and held my books to me. I saw him flipping through the papers in his hand. He looked at me. "Isabella." He said. I'm sure he got it from my papers since I label everything with my full name and date. He looked at me. "I think I know you. You're friends with my sister, right?" he asked. Just I predicted, that was the only thing he knew me as. Because it wasn't like we went to the same school since sixth grade or anything. the thought was really sad.
Regardless, I nodded quickly again, causing my glasses to slip again. Again I pushed them up. "You have a lot of stuff here. Some of this isn't even due for like weeks." He said as he handed them out to me.
"I like to stay on top of my work, I suppose." I replied in a soft voice as I took them, carefully not to touch his hand as I do so. I would probably faint in the middle of the hallway if he touched me. If I wasn't embarrassed enough before, passing out in the middle of the hall from one simple touch would do it for sure.
"That's cool." He said simply as he pushed his hands in the pockets of his jeans.
"R-really." I shuddered.
He shrugged. "Yeah, it's better to be ahead than behind."
"Jasper." Someone called him. He turned to see was calling him. I looked to see Edward signaling Jasper. "Come on, dude. What the hell's the hold up?" he asked.
"Here I come." Jasper answered back. He turned me and smiled at me again. "I have to go. Sorry about the run-in. I'll pay attention to where I'm going next time." He joked with a wink before turning away and jogging towards Edward.
"It's okay." I said softly. So softly, I was pretty sure he didn't hear me for he was already with his friends by the time I got it out. I still couldn't believe he actually stopped to help me. He was so nice, even to someone like me. Besides that fact that I wanted give Rosalie a reason to claim me as a friend, Jasper Hale was the real reason I wanted to change. The reason I was willing to change for him because I wanted nothing more but for him to ask me out and I knew he would never do it while I was like this. I knew he saw me just as his sister's friend, and most likely nothing else. But if I don't do anything else this year, I would change that.
"Stare much." I heard the perfect pitched voice I've become use to. I turned and smiled when I saw my best friend leaning against my locker. I couldn't help but wonder how long was she standing there like that. "Let me guess; you were thinking 'Wow Jasper's butt looks great in these jeans'." She teased.
I clinched. She knows I wasn't that shallow and that I hated it when makes jokes like that. That's just like saying I enjoy being friends with her because her looks. I love both of them for their hearts. Their looks were just an unnecessary plus. "Actually, if you must know, I was thinking of how sweet he is." I told her the half-truth.
She rolled her eyes, just like any other time I speak so highly of her brother. "Please, enlighten me. What did Prince Charming do this time?" she asked.
I sighed blissfully. "He helped with my books."
"Rosalie, he helped after knocking out of my hands, he didn't have to do that. Plus he even said it was 'cool' that I had so much work." I continued telling her.
She groaned. "Enough, please. Sorry I asked." She stopped me. She doesn't like it when I talk about Jasper like he's the Superman to my Lois Lane. To her, he's just a brother. To me, was everything and more. He could do no wrong. She pushed herself off my locker. "You know, I think I'm getting real tired of hearing how your love for him makes everything he does and says so great. You know he's leaves clumps of hair in the drain every morning. It's so damn disgusting, but you probably think it's fucking adorable."
I giggled at her. "Probably." I joked. "You mind stop swearing like that? You're better than that." I lectured her.
"Right." she chuckled, not taking how I feel about cursing seriously.
"In addition to that, do you mind that saying that so loud? I don't want the whole school to know. Just give people another reason to make fun of me." I reminded her.
She shook her head. "I don't understand why you don't let me handle people for you.'
"You can't fight all my battles for me all the time. Besides it will not solve anything and you know that." I told her.
She rolled her eyes. "Anyways, I'm pretty sure everyone knows, besides the football team. But they all share one brain that cares about nothing but their pigskin ball and partying with their groupies with pom-poms." She said in annoyance. Even through her brother was the receiver and she was dating the head of the defensive line, she was never a big fan of the sport. Or maybe it was our team she wasn't fond of.
I shook my head at her. "Please don't conjoin Jasper with the rest of that coterie. Your brother is deeper than you give him credit for."
"Whatever." She mumbled, knowing she wasn't getting through to me. She turned to my locker and opened it. She knows the combination to my locker just like I know the one to hers. Its best we should since we both keep our things in each other's lockers as they were our own. It's like we both have two lockers instead of one.
She reached up to the top shelf to grab her – as she calls it – "dancer's playbook". She takes pride in the fact that she is the choreographer for the cheerleading team and not an actual cheerleader. I can only assume that it was because she feels the same way about them as she did about the football team, nothing but annoyance. "You're not going to lunch today, right?" she asked as she flipped through the notebook. I shook my head no, knowing she could see me. "Great, I'll spent lunch with you." She announced.
I gave her a puzzled look. "Aren't you eating with Emmett?" I asked. She usually eats with her boyfriend and his team and plays the role of good football girlfriend; texting me the whole time. She can easily balance her relationship with her boyfriend and her friendship with her nerdy friend perfectly. I honestly don't know how she does it.
She shakes her head. "Nah. They have a game next weekend and I really don't feel like listening to them talk about the same damn plays over and over."
I smiled. "So I have you for a week." I was happy because I hardly get to see her during school.
She turned me and smiled. "Lucky you Izzie." She responded, using her nickname for me. She turned and looked into the mirror she put on my locker door. She rubbed lip gloss on her lips and made a pose or two into mirror. She offered it to me. I look at it then shook my head. She gave a laugh. "Right, what was I thinking?" she teased. She placed the notebook on her arm before closing the door. "Mind if we make a stop?" she asked as we started walking.
"What are you reading?" she said as we sat in the blenchers of the empty football field. It was only place completely empty during school. It was late August, so the weather was still nice enough to sit out here. But knowing Forks, I will be in the library by in mid-September. I thought I should enjoy it while it lasts.
I showed her the cover of the book, carefully not to lose my place. "Othio?" she read the cover. I fixed my glasses and nodded. I giggled when she gave a dramatic groan. "Shakespeare. I don't understand how anyone could understand anything he is saying. I will need help when we get to him, that's for sure. Speaking of which, aren't we studying him in November?" she asked.
"More like early December." I corrected her.
"So why read it now?" she said before taking a bite of her salad. Before we came to the field, she wanted to stop by the cafeteria to get something to eat; also to tell Emmett she was eating with me for the week. I would assume it went well enough. I wouldn't be sure. I stayed outside and waited for her. I don't really step a foot in there. Don't want to give Tanya another place to harass me.
I shrugged. "It's on the reading list. I had a copy from reading it last summer so I thought I'll read it now. Besides, it's not like we're doing much of anything yet."
She nodded. "Very true. so remind me, what's that one about again?" she asked. I gave her a small synopsis of the play. I made sure I covered the bases because I didn't feel like going too much into it. When I was finished, she nodded to let me know she understood. "If anyone asks me, the guy was a complete idiot."
"Why do you say that?" I asked before taking a bit into my ham and turkey sandwich I brought for lunch. Unlike her, and the rest of my classmates, I don't buy my lunch every day. I find it easier to just bring it.
"He should have just trusted his wife. And to kill her on top of it?" Then she shook her head. "It's just not right."
"It's just a play, Rosie." I laughed at her, using my nickname for her, before turning back to my book.
"Still…" she said before taking another bit of her salad. "Speaking of clueless people who should listen to others…" she stopped and I looked at her. "When the hell are you going to ask my brother out?"
I groaned. "Rosalie, not this again." she hates when I talk about him, but she doesn't hold her tongue when it comes to me asking him out. I don't understand her. "
"What? I'm tired of you talking about it and not doing anything. The whole 'admiring from afar' thing is so seventh century. Just do it already, its honesty not that hard."
I sighed. I closed my book and leaned against the blencher behind me. "Easy for you to say; you were born outgoing. While, I was not." I pushed up my glasses and looked at her. "You want an answer?" I asked. She nodded. "When I live up to my last name." I told her. She gave a laugh. I guess she thought I was joking. I tossed my book in my bag before leaning on my knees. "I'm serious, Rosie. He will not date someone like me."
She took a drink from her water bottle. "You know I hate it when you're down on yourself. You're very pretty. No one might be able to see it under baggy clothes."
I gave a snort. "Tanya doesn't think so." I told her.
"Oh please. Screw Tanya Denali. 80% of her isn't even really her. At least you have natural beauty." She picked at her salad. "You know he likes you." She said.
Now it was my turn to laugh. "No." I simply said.
She looked at me. "No you don't know…"
"No he doesn't." I interrupted her. I had to say, I was impressed she went to the whole reverse phycology thing. Impressive, yet complete translucent. It might have worked with someone else, I knew her better that. I'm sure she was just saying that as her way to give me a push. "He would have to notice me before he does something like that."
"Who said he doesn't?" she asked.
I gave her a knowing look. "Rosalie, allow me to ask you something: if he likes me so much, why hasn't he talk to me beside when I'm being a klutz?" she was about to say something, but stopped. "I'll tell you why, because as deep as I believe your brother is, he's still a guy and guys at this school don't notice girls who aren't giggling like they're high, flipping their hair like something's wrong with their neck and wearing something so tight, it might as well be body paint." I mumbled angrily.
Rosa laughed at me. I guess she heard my tone to voice. "Is that bitterness I hear in your voice, Izzie?" she teased. It was a rare occasion where I get upset like that and she knew that. "What is that about?" she asked.
I sighed and stared at the field in front of us. "Yesterday when I was walking to my class, I saw Jasper flirting with Jessica." I told her.
She rolled her eyes. "That slut. She was probably flirting with him."
"He sure didn't like he minded." I mumbled. "I don't know what he would see in her. She such a…bimbo." I said, because I couldn't think of a word to describe her better.
Rosalie laughed out loud. She also knows that I wouldn't say something like that nor would I ever talk about someone. But I couldn't help it; I feel like letting it when it out comes to Jasper. "I really like when you're upset like that. When you let your feelings out, you sound like a teenager and not someone writing a novel for college reading level."
I smiled before giving her a shove. "Shut up." I teased.
"But I wouldn't disagree with you. Not at all. The girl thinks she will be important by sleeping with the entire team and she doesn't even do it with the first sting players. It's nasty." She said in disgust as she shook her head. "Don't worry about Jasper. He knows how she is and was probably giving her the time of day to be nice."
I smiled. I had a feeling he wouldn't do something a low as hooking up with her. He's not someone like Edward who loves female attention; at least he doesn't show it. Rosalie saying that made me feel better. "That's good, but where exactly does that leave me?" I asked.
Rosalie sighed. "Bella, if you honestly don't like the way you look because you think Jasper is that shallow where he cares about something like that, change yourself." She said as if was so simple. Gee, wish I would have thought of something like that.
I gave a snort. "I don't even know where to start." I told her, looking away again.
"Let me help. I can sleepover tonight and do your hair in the morning before school."
I shook my head. "No thanks." I answered.
"You don't want to change." She stated.
I gave a deep exhale. "I do. It's just that I think I need something deeper than a surface change. I need a personality change as well. Because your outgoing personally is something you have been born with, if you tried to help with that, it would be like someone who was born skinny teaching someone how to lose weight. It doesn't work as well as you like to believe it should."
"Well, how the hell do you think you're going to get that 'deeper change'?" she asked.
"I don't have any idea." I sighed. "Is it so hard to be admired more for my thoughts than for my appearance?" I asked, more thinking out loud than actually asking her.
"Sadly Izzie, it is. As bad as it sounds, teens are hellva shallow." She said like she was disappointed in our generation. I would be lying if I said I didn't agree with the sound of it. "But look on the bright side…" she rested her head on my shoulder. "You'll always have me, no matter how hard to try to get rid of me." she teased.
I giggled. "Now who's being down on herself?" I teased back before rested my head on hers. "Thanks Rosie." I said. I don't know if she knows how much I really appreciate her friendship. I heard the sound of a distant bell. "We should go before we're late." I told her. She nodded in agreement before we grabbed our bags and made our way back to the building.
hey there, welcome the bottom of the page. the chp will probably be up this time tomorrow or this time friday. i gotta see how it does first.
oh...i just remembered the AP/AM outtakes. they will be there. i have to get in the mood to write those because as you know (and if you, you about to find out) i lost my chps so i have get in the rewrite it. that is also the reason this story is happening now instead the one with Bella and Jasper. i have to get the nerve to rewrite that because of the "graphic" scenes i wanted in there...so...yeah.
dont much else to say so...
like always Luv & Rockets!