As a mentor in this cesspool, it's never a good idea to favor one hero above all the others. Picking favorites can only ever end in heartache. You knew that from the first day you accepted this job, and you remember it to this day.

Still, there were always those demigods that you couldn't help but remember more distinctly than the others. [Oh, don't play stupid, you old horse. You know exactly what I'm talking about.] Even though the little brats had died forever ago, you still somehow remember their faces and names. [I don't know why you bother.]

Hershey Lee, ah...Hercules is a prime example. I suppose he was your biggest accomplishment. He killed the Nemean Lion, the Lernean Hydra, the Hind of Ceryneia, blah blah blah - the whole Twelve Labors. Honestly, I don't see why he's everyone's role model, he did kill his wife and children. [So Hera made him go mad, she meddles with everyone's lives. Why does he get special treatment?]

Then I suppose there's Peter Johnson's half-brother Theo Seas [Oh, fine. Theseus. But he's dead now. Does his name matter?] to think about. He "braved" the labyrinth (more like charmed my Ariadne into helping him), killed the Minotaur, but was too stupid to remember to change the sails of the ship to signify his survival, so his poor father Aegeus threw himself out of a window and into the sea. [He was a bright one, that one.]

There's also Jensen. [Jason.] He wasn't a demigod, but I know you liked him. He was an interesting boy, I must admit. The mortal led the Argonauts in their search for the Golden Fleece, and, I suppose, it wasn't an easy feat. [What? No, I didn't mean that in a positive way.] But personally, I think gaining the favor of Hera was his greatest accomplishment. [It's still not saying much.]

You miss these heroes, I know you do. But despite all your years of experience and wisdom and that annoying habit of remembering names, you forget that they each broke hearts without a second thought and manipulated enough people to make Hera and Aphrodite proud.

If you recall, Theseus used Ariadne to find his way through the Labyrinth. When she was no longer of any use to him, he abandoned her on an island to rot. He left the girl he owed his life to, let Daedalus be captured by Minos, won Helen over a bet like she was a strip of land, and had the gall to try to steal Persephone from Hades for his friend.

I worry for your standards of what a hero is sometimes.

Jason was a strong leader and a warrior, but like most of the little nose picking brats, he died alone. Medea spilled blood for him and gave him the world, and in return he promised to make her his wife. If he was smart, he never would have made an oath like that with the goddess of marriage as his patron. Needless to say, the boy broke his promise and Medea's heart.

Hercules was the worst. For all his bravery and strength, he was a despicable human being (and an even worse god). He manipulated young, naïve Zoë Nightshade to betray her family, lose her place as a Hesperid, and be blotted out from history. He didn't even thank her for her help and sacrifice. [I haven't been spending too much time Artemis, stop interrupting me.]

Then, as if one girl wasn't enough, Hercules humiliated Achelous and stole his fiancé. She killed eventually, of course, but he just popped back out of the Underworld as a god and now I have to put up with him for eternity.

If these boys were your definition of a hero, then I fear for Olympus' future. Yes, admittedly they began as three great, young men with good hearts, but they all failed in the end. As cruel as it is, only your final act proves whether you're a hero or not. [You know it's true.]

Even your current favorites, the girl Annie Bell, and that upstart Peter, will fail in the end. They might seem like brilliant demigods for now, Chiron, but they will be the ones to fall the farthest and the hardest. You'll see. [Yes, I meant that both figuratively and literally.

Oh, don't even try to lie to me, Chiron. I know they're your favorites. You've known Annie Bell since she was a little girl, just seven years old. You watched her mature and grow into a strong, brave heroine that Athena herself can't help but be prideful of.

You knew as soon as you went undercover as Mr. Brownie that Peter was something special. He stood up for the weak like a true hero of old and killed the Minotaur with his own horn. You watched him become one of the best swordsmen this camp has ever seen. And you witnessed him develop powers that not even the most famous of his half-brothers possessed.

You were there when they completed their first quest of many. You rallied your impossible brethren and saved them from Logan Cook's clutches. You watched Peter hop onto his pegasus and fly away to save Annie Bell and Artemis.

I saw that you were heartbroken over Peter's "death." Never did you ever look so relieved when he seemingly "came back" from the Underworld. You were there when he was offered to become a god and turned it down for Annie Bell. You didn't sleep, eat, or drink when you realized that your favorite pupil was in Lupa's hands.

Hercules, Theseus, and Jason might be your favorites, but Percy Jackson and Annabeth Chase are your shining stars. You'll remember them, every word, quest, and heroic qualities millenniums after they perish like all puny demigods do.

What?

No, I don't care. I haven't really been watching them. Just, ahhh - observing, yes, I couldn't have those two make a mess of my camp. I mean, Camp Half-Blood, not my camp in particular.

What are you talking about? I hate this godforsaken cauldron of death and children. I'm only here because of my probation... Of course I'm still on it, Zeus didn't pardon me completely... Oh, that's what he said? I-I had no idea.

Oh, stop it. I don't care about Percy and Annabe - Peter and Annie Bell. I didn't attend Peter's funeral, I wasn't impressed when he turned down power for love, I didn't say I had to spend fifty years of my life away from my Ariadne and wine so I could watch Peter and Annie Bell grow old together and maybe see their impudent offspring, and I certainly don't think they're heroes.

I'm going back to Olympus before daddy dearest sees I'm missing. And you're impossible, absolutely impossible. When Percy and Annabeth prove to be bloodthirsty traitors, I'll be there to tell you I told you so.

...What? No, this is not my way of coping with their...predicament. I could care less if the whole camp was in Tartarus, good day, Chiron.]


Really short, lacking in detail and action, in general not my best fanfic, but Mr. D was fun to write. Please review!